Why did Dead End hate her so much? It wasn�t her fault she fell in love. It wasn�t. She couldn�t control how she felt about Scythe. But according to him she had made him weak, it was her fault he had been killed. And he was going to make her life a living hell. It had already started. He had approached her and threatened her and now Firefly lay on the couch downstairs, covered with bruises. He was going to kill everyone she was close to.

Who would he end up hurting next? Knots? Nicholas? Oh God. If he ever hurt her son Gervaise wouldn�t know what to do. He was everything to her. He was the reason she didn�t kill herself after Scythe had been killed. If Dead End hurt her son� she didn�t even want to think about that. She could still hear him screaming on the bed and the noise was music to her ears at this point.

It was all her fault that Firefly had been hurt, he could have been killed at any time. Seeing that man with his hand around his neck, threatening to kill him� it made her sick to her stomach. She had told Firefly to be careful, why hadn�t he listened to her? She told him that man could and probably would kill him but he didn�t even care about that. He just wanted to protect her.

Then it was her fault.

If Firefly hadn�t become to attached to her after his sister had been killed, Dead End would have no reason to come after him. He wouldn�t be downstairs on the couch, barely able to move. And if she hadn�t fallen in love with Scythe, if she hadn�t gotten pregnant and if he had never proposed to her then she never could have made him weak. And he would still be alive. She wanted to know what she did to deserve all this pain. It just wasn�t fair. Firefly didn�t do anything. He only was hurt because of her. She did it. It was her fault he was hurt!

The blade was calling to her again. She couldn�t take it. If she wasn�t alive then no one else could get hurt because of her. Her arm was already ripped up and if Knots hadn�t come in she would have killed herself. But now she was thinking again. It would all be too easy. Firefly couldn�t be killed too. She couldn�t let that happen. She wouldn�t.

She took a deep break and stared down at her blade and all the blood around her arm. It was still bleeding and she was starting to get light-headed. Nicholas was crying louder then ever but she couldn�t hear him. She didn�t know what to do. She couldn�t leave Nicholas but she didn�t want Firefly to be killed, or anyone else she was close to. Firefly� she couldn�t loose him too. She couldn�t loose another person who she was falling in love with.

Her brown eyes moved from the blade to the mirror in her room. Her reflection scared her. So this was what she looked like? Tear stained face, blood shot eyes. This was what Firefly wanted to protect. This was what he could be killed for?

Her fist hit the glass before her mind realized what happened. There was a sharp pain in her fist where pieces of the shattered mirror lodged itself and more blood trickled down to her arm. She stared at nothing now, her reflection gone, broken on the floor.

�You stupid whore��

She bit down on her red lips and shook her head. She couldn�t let him get to her. She couldn�t let him do this to her. She was better than this. Stronger. Firefly was going to be fine. Dead End wasn�t going to do anything to him again. Everything was going to be fine. If she just stayed inside the lodging house and kept Firefly in with her, she won�t have a reason to worry again. She wasn�t going to loose him too.

She wrapped her arm and fist up with the bandages she kept in the medicine cabinet then went to the bed where Nicholas was laying, crying. Gervaise picked him up and held him close to her.

�Everything�s going to be fine��

And for once, she actually believed herself.