Alcohol Warnings

• WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
• WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an idiot.
• WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to smash your head in.
• WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.
• WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happended to your pants.
• WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.
• WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers.
• WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead and mystery bruises.
• WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.
• WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing with you.

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