Frank Hall's
Quotes of the Week!
August 1999 -- December 1999, Ed. 4
WEEK:
8/28/99, 8/30/99:
"It smells like pineapples in here, and I'm not kidding."
--Ruthie Bennett, 8/29
"It's nice..." --Frank
"Yeah, my cock's nice, too, but ya don't see me hanging it up on the wall!"
--Scott Abrams, regarding the braille signs in Crane, 8/29
"Well, it was nice to meet you..." --random freshman
"Well..., uhh... It's nice to be met."
--Dr. Heinick, 8/30 [author: Scott Abrams]
"Oh Goldeneye!! The vibrating game!!"
--Karen Kotelnicki, 8/30
"(Cough, cough)... Excuse me... I just ate a granola bar."
--Dr. McGinness, 9/1
"I'm writing a song in your honor." --Pat
"What's it called, 'Slutty Whore'?"
--Brittany Moore, 9/1
"Don't study... ...have sex."
--Pat Holden whining to Brittany, 9/1
"This is aural skills hell, and I'm your host."
--Mr. LaVine, 9/2
"People think I'm nuts, but I'm just drunk, that's all."
--PACES Bookstore Lady while intoxicated [author: Karen K.]
"DING-- That'sRight."
--x
9/6/99:
"Why the hell's it gotta be Labor Day?!"
--random kid in Crane, 9/6
"You could always just shuck clams."
--Ryan Olsen [author: Ryan Olsen?]
Chris Congero: "I'd hate to be down there [Crumb Library Basement] in a fire. There would be no way out!..."
Frank: "...Except for the two staircases down there (moron)."
"Ahh, oral satisfaction."
--Narrator from Child Development Video [author: Scott Abrams]
"Scott, I have a plan..." --Frank
"Oh God, what is it, to be single till you're 40?"
--Scott Abrams [author: Scott Abrams]
"Mr. LaVine, why is the clock going backwards?"
"That is weird... WHOA, THAT IS COOL!!"
--Mr. LaVine, 9/9
"Don't you mean find one and take her back to your room for ravenous shagging?"
--Dan White, via email, 9/10
"I've never done this before..." --Liz Moore
"Oh, so you're a radio virgin, then I'm going to break your radio hymen."
--Scott [author: Scott Abrams]
"What's in your hedgehog's eye?" --Kevin to Collin
"Jizz... what do you expect when you screw a brush?"
--Collin, regarding the image on his computer screen [author: Scott?]
9/13/99: (Unfortunately, these quotes had to be "re-hashed" because the original sheet was stolen from the door).
"I'm good friends with Kev-O [Murphy]... ...wanna go out?"
--Kevin, making fun of Frank, 9/13
"Scott's student has a speech impediment--" --Dr. Schaff
"DAMN!!" --Scott, jokingly, 9/13
"Entertainment in Potsdam-- getting as drunk as possible."
--Dr. Mcginness, 9/15, speaking about what students do in their free time.
"Is the room spinning?"
"No... AHAHAHAHAHHAHA YES!!"
--Megan, Kevin's sister in a test of her sobriety, 9/18
"...." "...." "...." "...."
--Final Fantasy 8, said by 4 different characters in the game [author: Scott Abrams]
9/20/99:
"Does anyone know... ...why?"
--Dr. McGinness, for no apparent reason, 9/20
"The power is back on..." "Hey!!" "Party's over." "Goodnight."
--Pat, Frank, and Kev-O, the instant the power came back on, 9/20-21 c.2:00a.m.
"I'm gonna sell you all to Fredonia for a dog, and shoot the dog."
--Mr. LaVine, Aural skills class, 9/21
"A woman's mouth is for only two things, and one's eating." --Collin to Karen at Dinner
"And the other is also eating." --Frank, 9/21
"How could they leave without telling us?!"
--Liz Moore, 9/23 [author: Brittany Moore]
"Just walk away FASTLY..."
--Pat, 9/24 [author: Ryan Flatt]
9/27/99:
"I don't want anyone listening to a ragtime and saying, 'oh, this is Stravinsky!'"
--Dr. McGinness, 9/24
[singing:]
"Now-that-you're-stinking-rich,
We'll-gladly-be-your-bitch!"
--"Family Guy", 9/26
"George Crumb is on crack."
--George Father, referring to one of the more famous composers of new music, 9/27
"He wrote a piece called 'The Cunning Little Vixen...'"
"...? ...Oh, CUNNING!"
--Frank, misreading Dr. McGinness' handwriting, 9/29
"I don't really want to go home because, I hate my roomate."
--Random kid walking down the hall, 9/29 [author: Scott Abrams]
"Hey, you dike bag slut!!"
--Scott Abrams, 10/2
10/4/99:
"Sometimes, there's an abundance of things...
Sometimes, there's a lack.
Today, there's an abundance of...
Titties."
--Poetry? by Dave Matthews, Woodstock '99
"Frank-Hall-the-third is here, we can start class."
--Dr. McGinness
"I'm no opponent of happiness."
--David Letterman to Harrison Ford, 10/4/99
"With the length of my nose, I'm a danger to everyone."
--Dr. Suchy to George Father who was trying to hit her with his trombone [author: Kevin Murphy]
"I'm gonna beat you with a pineapple."
--Ruth, 10/5
"I'm half a century today. Today is the ultimate of Hump Days."
--Mr. LaVine on his birthday, 10/6
"Chris, is there swing dancing on Sunday?"
"No..."
"DAMN! That means I can't be stood up three times in a row!"
--Frank, 10/6
"Hey Karen. Who loves you more than me, besides that salt-shaker boyfriend of yours?"
--Phil Greco, 10/7
10/11/99:
"Your personality is your best birth-control device."
--David Letterman, to Harlan Williams, 10/14
"Oooh, I got a fly on me... that's disgusting."
--Dr. McGinness, 10/15
(slow week this week as there was an October break).
10/18/99:
The class: Music Literature and Style, monday 10/18/99
Professor: Dr. McGinness
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"I need that pencil back." --Amy Cornell
"Oh, you were gonna take a note?" --Dr. McGinness, 10/18
"It's not all gonna be multiple choice! Oh! That doesn't give you a fighting chance!" --Dr. McGinness
"You have no heart..." --Rebecca Robbins
"That's right, I have no heart, that's a good observation." --Dr. McGinness
"What if we go on strike?" --Rebecca
"Oh, as opposed to all the emotional manipulation?" --Dr. McGinness
"Dr. McGinness, are you okay?" --class
"Am I...?" --Dr. McGinness
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"Mr. Tallman, what are you doing for Halloween?" --kid in elevator
"Oh, I'm gonna go home and have a paigan ritual..." --Mr. Tallman
(-- Dead Silence --)
"HA-HA-HA-HA!!" --Mr. Tallman, 10/20
"Oh hey, there's a cart in the elevator..." "let's ride it!"
Scott Abrams and Mr. Tallman: "YEEEAAAA!!" ,10/20
"I'm going to cancel class friday and move the midterm to monday." --Dr. McGinness
Frank Thad Hotto: [Sing the "Wheel of Fortune" theme song], 10/20
"It's a fly graveyard, what can I say?"
--Dr. McGinness, regarding our Crane classroom, 10/20
"I can't be dry because the first two letters of my name are K-Y!"
--Kyra, regarding xxx, 10/23
10/25/99:
"This is an odd-looking test, because... ..............I don't know how to make a test."
--Dr. McGinness, 10/25
"A required resource was."
--Scott Abram's error message on his computer, 10/26
"There's two ways of pronouncing your mom's name, one is Mrs. Hall and the other is uugghhh!"
--Scott Abrams, in a casual mom joke, 10/28
"Where the F*** is my gummy d*ck?!"
--Mikey Caravello, 10/30 [author: Scott Abrams]
11/1/99:
"How many are dimly aware of their existence today?"
--Mr. LaVine, 11/2
"Frank, you don't have a big one." --Anna to Frank
"Nope..." --Frank in reply
"I need a small one..." --Lorelei
"I guess that means I can help, huh?" --Frank, 11/15 [author: Kevin Murphy]
"You guys weren't born in 1975? I guess I mistook you all for mature adults. HAHAHAHA, that's a pretty funny thing if I do say so myself! Ha-ha-ha, I love my own jokes."
--Dr. McGinness, 11/3
"Hey, it's snowing out, I'm allowed to be crude."
--Frank
"No wonder he came up here."
--Kevin Murphy, 11/7
"Let me eat my _____ by myself!"
--Frank, after being harassed, 11/8 [author: Kevin Murphy]
11/8/99:
"It's a bag of air, like your scrotum." --Collin
"No, no... That's like a bag of raisins."
--Frank, 11/9 [author: Collin]
"The Nazi regime... DEFINES oppression!!"
--Dr. McGinness, 11/10
"What instrument do you usually play?"
--Canadian Brass dealing the ultimate slam to Allison, playing her French Horn, 11/11
"Veneer!!"
--Martin Crane on Frasier, as they all drink, 11/11
"I don't know, Dr. McGinness, ever since I've been in Potsdam, I'm not as smart as I used to be."
--Rebecca Robbins
"Good, it's working then."
--Dr. McGinness, 11/12 [author: Kim Coleman]
"I was in GOONIES!!"
--Corey Feldman in some cheezy skiing movie [Meatballs 4?]
"All I want, is a prostitute right now."
--George (next door neighbor), randomly and solemnly, 11/14
"Homer, what wacky name do you want on the scoreboard?"
"Are Poo and Ass taken?"
"Yeah."
"DAMN!"
--Simpsons, 11/14
"Oooo... cocksuckers..."
--Moaned by Belle, 11/14
11/15/99:
"I don't wanna see girls sing, I wanna see hot... flaming... gay men sing."
--Ruth B., 11/16
"Does it smell like any kind of fruit in here?"
--Frank, alluding to Pineapples
"The only fruit in here is you, Frank."
--Ruth B., 11/16
"Sometimes, I wish I was a lesbian. Oops, did I say that out loud?"
--Chandler, Friends, 11/18
"It's a tit nipply outside..."
--Phil Greco
"Yeah... And it's pretty cold out, too."
--Frank, Winter Camping '99
"I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die."
--South Park Movie, regarding "that time" of the the month [author: Katie C.]
11/22/99:
"I know this is the sex mobile..."
--Dr. Schaff to the three students squeezed in the back of his car, to St. Mary's, 11/23
(Thanksgiving break)
11/29/99:
"Screw you, snow!!"
--Scott, driving up to Potsdam, 11/28
"Would you like to sleep with me?"
--Pat, very straightforwardly (and actually meaning sleep), 11/29
"Do you have any of that beer with the candy in it... you know, Skittlebrow?"
--Homer Simpson [author: Scott A.]
"I don't even know you and you're already excluding me from sex."
--Scott A., 11/29
"I buy a lot of beers."
--Chris Washburn, renowned Trombonist, 11/30
The Dr. McGinness quotes you've been waiting for:
"Somebody told me we only have two weeks of classes left. Therefore, I'm going to ask that you all stay over Christmas break to finish the material."
--Dr. McGinness, very dryly and seriously, 11/29
"Because of the lack of time, we're gonna skip around to the music I like. HAHA!! That's exactly what we're gonna do."
--Dr. McGinness, 11/29
"That's a quote."
--Dr. McGinness, as he looks toward Frank, 12/1
"You look distressed. It must be all that Messiaen talk."
--Dr. McGinness to Tammy, 12/1
"Thad??!!... Oh, Thad..."
--Dr. McGinness, frustrated with Thad and Adaiah in the back, 12/1
________________________________________________________________
"What did you say?! She whips me like a bag of ziti??"
--Julie Brasch, while hearing, "she wants me like a bad disease.", 12/2
"And speaking of gay, nice sweater."
--Bill W. to Pat, 12/2
"Does a guy's crotch smell like spoiled milk?"
--Ryan F., sincerely wondering, 12/2
"What? I missed the sour milk crotch thing."
--Pat, 12/2
12/6/99:
"YOUR BATTERY IS RUNNING LOW. YOUR SCREEN HAS BEEN DIMMED... ..."
--Mr. LaVine's Lap-top
"You're a putz, ya know that?"
--Mr. LaVine, 12/6
"I hate to interrupt the topic I know you love, which is disease..."
--Dr. McGinness, 12/3
"Be sure to write your names and phone numbers on the blue evaluation sheets."
--Dr. McGinness, 12/10
"Bye, don't fail the final, ok??!!"
--Dr. McGinness, 12/10