Once I was severely hurt by a couple of ministers. People would say, "I can't believe they did this to you. Aren't you hurt?"
I would quickly respond, " No, I am fine. I'm not hurt." I knew it was wrong to be offended, so I denied and repressed it. I convinced myselfI was not hurt, but in reality I was. Pride masked the true condition of my heart.
Pride keeps you from dealing with truth. It distorts your vision. You never change when you think everything is fine. Pride hardens your heart and dims the eyes of your understanding. It keeps you from the change of heart- repentance- which will set you free. 2 Tim 2:24:26.
Pride causes you to view yourself as a victim. Your attitude becomes, "I was mistreated and misjudged;thereforeI am justified in my behavior." Because you believe you are innocent and falsely accused, you hold back forgiveness. Though your true heart condition is hidden from you, it is not hidden from GOD.
Just because you were mistreated, you do not have permission to hold on to an offense. Two wrongs do not make a right.
Many are this way today. They do not see the true condition of their hearts just as I was unable to see the resentment I carried toward those ministers. I had convinced myself I was not hurt.
Jesus told the Laodiceans how to get out of their deception: to buy God's gold and to see their true condition.
Jesus' first instruction for breaking free from deception was to "buy from Me gold refined in the fire" (Rev 3:18)
Refined gold is soft and pliable, free from corrosion or other substances. It is when gold is mixed with other metals(copper,iron,nickel and so on) that it becomes hard, less pliable and more corrosive. This mixture is called alloy. The higher the percentage of foriegn metals, the harder the gold becomes.
Conversely, the lower the percentage of alloy, the softer and more flexible.
Immediately we see the parallel: A pure heart is like gold-soft,tender,and pliable. Hebrews 3:13 states that hearts are hardened through the deceitfulness of sin! If we do not deal with an offense, it will produce more fruit of sin, such as bitterness, anger, and resentment. This added substance hardens our hearts just as alloys harden gold. This reduces or removes tenderness, creating a loss of sensitivity. We are hindered in our ability to hear God's voice. Our accuracy to see is darkened. This is a perfect setting for deception.
The first step in refining gold is grinding it into a powder and mixing it with a substance called flux. Then the mixture is placed in a furance and melted by intense heat. The alloys and impurities are drawn to the flux and rise to the surface. The gold ( which is heavier) remains at the bottom. The impurities or dross (such as copper, iron,and zinc, combined with flux) is then removed, yeilding a purer metal.
Now look at what God says:
Behold I have refined you,but not as silver;I have tested you in the furance of affliction. Isaiah 48:10
And again:
In this you greatly rejoice, though now for alittle while, if need be, you havebeen grieved by various trials, that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at he revelation of Jesus Christ. 1Peter 1:6-7.