September 2001
09-02-2001
Movies this week: O, Jeepers creepers
worked several days this week finally got to work alone. not like i dont know what i am doing. everything is going fine there. almost lost tara this week but we talked it out. i am trying to be more comunicative for her but it is difficult for me. i am supposed to go to a 2600 meeting on friday. i am looking forward to that. i made a deal with a guy online for a copy of every simpsons episode made. 17 cds worth of simpsons. thats alot of "Doh!"s.
09-09-2001
Movies this week: the musketeer, rockstar, some other crap.
My cousin jennifer came up this weekend. i took her aroud the city and to city club. i think she had a good time. i have been working quite a bit. got my first paycheck, one weeks worth. i finally got a joystick fro the new game i have been playing, called world war 2 online. i was asked to join a group of people who play together as the infamous 3rd SS panzer division. to me its an honor. i missed the 2600 meeting my own fault damn it. oh well, there is always next month. i now notice how everyday my love for tara grows stronger. i dont think there will be a limit either.
09-16-2001
world trade center fell due to a terrorist attack.
this week was a particularly dark week for me. the love of my life has left me. thats right tara left me. and a large part of me has died. there is an emptyness here that i fear will never leave. snd if your reading this it is not ment to hurt you or make you feel guilty tara. i feel she has been manipulated by another girl has saw a moment of weakness in her. i believe this girl used taras own sympathetic heart against her. this other girl is known for doing such things. i love you tara and i will always miss you. every girl i will ever know will be compared to you.
i also left my job today. i told them i wanted 2 weeks of emergency leave. the said ok so i left. i just cant be up there in that dark and lonely booth with these thoughts going through my head. i just cant turn it off. i trtuly believe that if i had finshed my shift i would have had a nervous breakdown.
i had never anounced this before but... about 6 months ago tara and i secretly became engaged. it was so sweet too. she asked me over Instant messenger. she made me want to be a better person. she was my sole motivation in life. i miss her so much. i have never felt a hurt like this before.
i love you tara.
09-23-2001
this week has been very hard for me. copeing with this loss is too much for me to bear. i had to quit my job. being up in that booth all alone with nothing to do but think almost caused me a nervous breakdown. only thing i have done was work on setting up a second computer for my family guy/simpsons server. as soon as i get a big harddrive it will be complete.
tara i love you. please come back soon. life has no meaning without you.
09-30-2001
oncec again a difficult week. but i feel better now. because are now back together, once again she is my girlfriend and still the love of my life. i was asked to bring a resume into a local computer shop this week and have an interview next thursday. i look forward to it. im drunk and i hurt
