Forget the Florida balloting controversy and the Supreme Courts Decision to put a coke head Texan in the White House, this is the real reason why Al Gore should be our president. Our story begins in Taiwan. Now there�s really only two good things about Taiwan, number one, the food, if your in to that kinda stuff, like those tai chicken pizzas at Scholtsky�s Deli, I think their quite good but a wee bit on the spicy side, and number two, the hash. But our story has nothing to do with either of those things and we are getting off the subject, our story has to do with no holds barred Taiwanese kick boxing tournaments held in the small town of Taipei. Its actually the country�s capital due to all the revenue it makes from these underground tournaments. Now, way back in 1966 the former attorney general of the United States (1992-2000), Janet Reno was still a woman. She didn�t have a penis of her own yet because the surgery needed to give a woman a fully functional penis was a bit, shall we say �shady� back then. So Janet Reno went on a quest for some cock. What she found was current attorney general John Ashcroft. The two hit it off immediately and were soon aboard a private jet to Taipei to witness the kick boxing match of the century, Zao Ming Chong Wang Zing v.s. Jerry Chan (the now deceased younger brother of Jackie Chan who died in a freak wood chipper accident in 1982). Ashcroft and Reno had a great time at the tournament and on their way back to the States they became official members of the mile high club. 9 months later Reno gave birth to a baby boy, but she decided she could not keep him because it would be weird for the kid to have two fathers. So Reno gave the baby to George and Barbara Bush. George Bush suffered from a narrow urethra and was also impotent, this made it very hard to make babies so he readily adopted the little fella. They named the boy George W. Bush and they raised him as if he were there own. In little W�s adolescence, his parents told him the true story of his biological mother and father. This devastated W and he soon resorted to alcohol and cocaine. All this would lead to him becoming a C+ average student at Yale and winning the Presidency by a hair over Al Gore. But wait, W was born in late 1966 meaning that in 2000, the year of W�s election he was only 34 years old. By law, you must be 35 years old to run for president and that makes W a cheater. Forget the Florida balloting controversy, W�s only 36 and Gore should be our president. �2002 paid for by the organization of getting Bush out of office cause he�s a coke head hippie, |
| Why Al Gore Should be President of the United States |
| Articles by Mr. Grant Glover |