-- An S-TEK Reprint (514) 597-2409

THE GAY POPULATION.

    While in St. John's is hardly San Francisco, people may be
surprised to discover how many gay people live and work here. The
number could run as high as 10 per cent of the population. If this is
the case, many gay people find it incredible that so many myths about
them remain.

    Chris and John, (not their real names) are a young gay couple who
live in St. John's. Chris 'came out of the closet' a year ago. John
hasn't fully come out yet.

    "It's crazy how many myths, misconceptions and outright lies still
exist about us"' Chris said. "A lot of people still think that all gay
people, especially men, are promiscuous. I think that there is
probably less promiscuous gay men than promiscuous straight people."

    "Why is it that people think that gay people are only out for sex?
We have loving relationships just like anyone else. A lot of people
think that all gay men are effeminate and all lesbians are butch," he
said. "That is not true.  They think gay people have a choice about
being homosexual. That is not true. They think that all male
hairdresser are gay. Misconceptions like this would be funny if they
weren't so widespread and damaging."

    "What get me mad is when a straight man looks at you as if he
expects you to jump him where he stands," Chris said. "They needn't
feel so insecure. Sometimes I feel like saying 'Don't worry, I won't
touch you if you paid me!'"

    Most gay people feel that they are no difference from anyone else.
They love as much, get hurt as much and need just as much affection
and reassurance as anyone else.

    "In a way, being gay means that you have even more problems than a
straight person," Chris said. "If John and I have a fright in public
it is very difficult to make up then and there. If we have a problem
that a quick hug would cure and we're in the mall where we can't
really do that, the problem festers. By the time we are in a position
to make up, it can sometimes be too late, the damage is already done."

        TELLING THE FAMILY

    Lord forgive me anything as long as I was never gay. I moved out and
told them, 'Look, I'm gay. If you can't handle it I'll just stay away.'
It took them a while to get use to the idea," Chris said. "Now
everything is fine. My mum is great about it."

    John has not come out. In public, with his family and employers,
he continue to live a lie. Chris is the opposite. He is out and proud
of it.

    "I haven't a problem telling people that I'm gay," Chris said.
"Sometimes I will not tell people if I know that it might offend them
or something. But if I'm talking to someone and they even hint of
being homophobic, I cut them off. I'm not very good that way. People
who can't handle it aren't worth it. It is too much trouble for all
concerned."

    "One thing I really can't handle is people who ask me why I choose
to be gay," Chris said. "I did not choose to be gay. No one choose to
be gay. You are either born gay or you come to realize quite early
that you are gay. Choice has nothing to do with it."

    Chris said he realized that he was gay when he was about seven.

    "I had been abused as a child. I've found myself wondering whether
I was abused because I was gay or weather I was gay because I was
abused. Either way it doesn't matter. I am gay, for whatever reason,
and I am happy."

        ACCEPTING HOMOSEXUALITY

    John said he felt that he was born gay, but he went through a lot
of development before he totally accepted it.

    "Environment has a lot to do with it. Some people don't come to
realize that they are gay until after puberty," John said.

    Chris feels that even though he is gay he would like to have
children.

    "I'd love them. I'd adopt them. I don't think that it matters
whether you are gay or not. As long as there is love in the
relationship."

    Despite the number of gay people in St. John's, Chris and John
feel the social scene is rather stagnant.

    A downtown St. John's club known to the gay community, is the only
gay bar Chris knows about in the province.

    "Even in Toronto where there are more bars, the community is
fairly insular," Chris said. "I think lesbians have a bit of a easier
chance with other woman and no one seems
to care. If a man dances with another man - even if they aren't
actually gay - they get some funny looks.

        GAY BASHING

    Sometime public reaction goes beyond just funny looks. Chris said
when some people get a few drinks in, they are prone to fighting.

    "As far as gay-bashing goes I haven't had it happen to me but I've
heard of several others who have," he said. "I'm very fearful. I don't
mind putting up with a bit of harassment, but I don't want to get
beaten up."

    "The closest I've come was when I was walking towards the East
End, downtown. This is the cruising area for a lot of gay men," Chris
said. "I was not looking for anyone, I was just out for some air. As I
turned to go back to work I saw two bare-chested men. They started to
throw things and shout "You'd better run faggot! We're going to get
you faggot!""

    "These guys were pretty big so I was scared," Chris said. "When
one started to chase me I took off. Luckily a friend happened by in a
car."

    John said that he heard the was a group of people in town who used
to beat up gay men.

    "One would come to the club and pick someone up. He'd take him off
in a car and drive to a parking lot or something. Another car would be
waiting, full of men who would beat the man up pretty bad," John said.

        LITTLE SYMPATHY

    Chris said there have been complaints made to the Royal
Newfoundland Constabulary, "but nothing seems to happen. Someone told
me the (the RNC) laughed, as if saying gays deserved that sort of
treatment."

    Until it was recently dissolved, there was a gay association in
St. John's. As far as Chris and John are concerned, it was not much
use while it was in existence.

    "It seemed to be more of a dating service than anything else,"
Chris said. "If someone really put there mind to it they could
probably get funding from the Secretary of State to set up an
association," he said. "I think that there should be some sort of
origination. Gay people should have somewhere where people can help
them deal with any problems they have."

    "This might seem to prove that gay people are difference, but I
don't think this is the case. Gay people are the same as anyone else,
"Some people have kept their misconceptions about gay people
because they are afraid," Chris said.

        AIDS FEARS

    "Since the AIDS virus appeared some people are even more afraid
and therefore more prejudiced. They have no reason to be. We are not
monsters. We are not sick, perverted or diseased, or in need of help
for our condition."

    "We are no difference from anyone else," Chris said. "We are just
as afraid of something as AIDS as anyone else. One of the differences
is that we don't look for someone to blame, we simply practice safe
sex to protect ourselves and other people. We are no more to blame for
the spread of AIDS as is any other person, heterosexual or homosexual,
who have sex without any protection."

-- An S-TEK Reprint (514) 597-2409