TOP 10 SIGNS YOUR PORT CHARLES MOB
IS IN TROUBLE
[10] One of your best men double-crossed you in exchange for photographs of a semi-naked supermodel lounging in a rubber raft.
[9] The closest thing you have to an Italian-American member is a guy named Shawn whose father works for Chef-Boyardee.
[8] Dirty cops won't accept your bribes from your men without proper photo identification.
[7] Your loansharks religiously check pay phone change return slots for quarters.
[6] One of your toughest bodyguards moonlights as a window dresser at Wyndham's.
[5] As you exit the video store after renting "THE GODFATHER", you hear one of the acne-prone teenage clerks mutter, "As if."
[4] Your former mob moll still gets carded....at the library.
[3] Dara Jensen just replaced your photo on the MOST WANTED LIST with some guy who tipped over the jukebox at Kelly's.
[2] Your biggest fear is running into those troublemakers from the Port Charles Elks Club in a dark alley.
[1] You've started buying your cement shoes at Pay*Less.