As a woman, I have been lied to, cheated on, told that I�m stupid, told that I�m ugly. I have been called a cow, pig, walrus and told I need to lose weight.
I found a man whom I thought was different. He said he was, just another lie. He told me I am beautiful. Told me not to change a thing because I am not obese or a BBW (Big Beautiful Woman).
I now find myself doing laundry for a man who wants to go �fuck� other women. I also clean up after him and try to take care of his every need. My life stopped the day I met him. I no longer have my own personality nor do I have any of my old interests or hobbies. I�m useless to everyone else and to myself, but I am very useful to him.
Stripping away the layers, one by one, he manages to alienate my friends and family. They no longer want to be around me. Phone calls go unanswered. Trips to their houses are met with lame excuses before I can get a foot in the door.
So when do I get to become me again? Is it so much to ask that my life remains in tact when I walk into a relationship? Why can�t HIS life be the one that stops? Is there per chance some kind of rule book for this type of thing?
Until all the rules are all spelled out previously, I don�t think any relationship will be free from it�s problems. But becoming a door mat for a man is not my idea of fun. Maybe next year my New Year�s resolutions should be: 1. To find a man who appreciates ME for ME; 2. Under no circumstances will I again become a door mat!
