Story 1 - Aoshi No Obi or Purple Passion

      The cool stream gently carressed the rocks along the bank.  Meditating to the sound of the liquid mirror, Aoshi leaned against a stalwart pine.
       All of a sudden his eyes flew open.
       "That's it!" He snarled, "This butt-bow has to go!"
Misao:  But, but (whimpers) Aoshi-sama!  You look soooo kawaii!!
Mamoru:  Hai... buttbows look sooo good... (looks after Sailor Moon's butt as she walks by)
      Aoshi cranes his neck to view his own butt-bow. 
       "I don't know - I'm  not sure how to wear it..."
       "That's okay," said Mamoru.  "I'll get Usagi to teach you."
       "Nani?"
    As the writer had a lapse in a plot-line, Aoshi took his double kodachi and decided with stern consternation and  resolved that he should find a better accessory for his already-great-trenchcoat-motif.
Misao:  (stops Aoshi) where do you think YOU'RE Going?!?
Aoshi:  (reddening: teardrop) -_-* Well, ano... er... um... (sees Usagi walk by) HER!  I was
           going to learn how to wear THIS (gestures to buttbow) from her (points to Usagi)
Usagi:  Oh yeah.  I can show you that... and much more... (winks)
Aoshi:  (blushes) ...oro...
       Suddenly, Kenshin popped u out of the bushes, fuku hanging off his shoulders.
        "Nani? Aoshi, you can't say "oro".  That's my line!"
        Aoshi sternly surveyed Kenshins disarray of clothing.  "Um, Kenshin?  You might want to fix that..."
        Kenshin looked confused.  "Fix what?  Oh, my clothes."
       Sano suddenly popped up out of the bushes behind Kenshin.
       "What's happening?"
      Everyone in the storyline suddenly stopped and blinked as they came to the scary realization that Sano and Kenshin (partially unclothed) had just popped out of the same shrub.
      <Everyone pauses again as they realize the obvious plug for this portion's writer>
Kaoru: (appearing out of no where) KENSHIN! HOW COULD YOU?!? (bitch slaps
           Kenshin, Kaoru runs off to relieve her sorrows in Enishi's arms)
Touga:  (bitch slaps Kenshin) Don't you know that us red heads are supposed to stick
            together?
       Aoshi:  Touga, you suck!  Someone needs to kill you, and has for a long time.
       Sano:  Suck?  <drags Kenshin back into the bushes>
       Aoshi:  I challenge you to a duel.
       Touga:  Die!
  <All of a sudden some kick-ass Utena soundtrack music is heard>
Aoshi:  <pulls out his kodachi> bring out that pitiful excuse of a weapon.
Touga:  <sneer> You have alot of nerve for not even having the Power of Dios!
Aoshi:  <blinks> Fine.  If it's THAT that I need...

<all of a sudden, Gambit and Vash step to each side of Aoshi>
<Aoshi slightly twitches his left eyebrow and Vash/Gambit backs arch as double kodachi come from their chests>

Touga:  Uhhh... oro...
Kenshin:  <his hand appears from the bush>  That's my line!
Aoshi:  Shut up!  <grabs the Kodachi and with the "Flowing Movement of Water" Technique
          confuses Touga>
Touga:  Ohmigosh!  There's so many of you!  I'm tingling with excitement!  Where do I
          start?
Aoshi:  <slices Touga's head off bringing an abrupt end to the meaningless life of Touga>
           <somewhere, Jennifer looks up>
Darth:  What is it, Mistress?
Jennifer:  It was teh sound of a thousand voices calling out in pain.
Darth:  Forget that <pats his lap> Come back.