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It was a non-illuminated and violently precipitatious night. My 4-wheeled
vehicle suddenly came to a halt on a god-forsaken road. As I stepped out of my vehicle, I noticed a mansion, rather eerie in appearance, on top of the hill next to me. The mansion was surrounded by an extinguished forest to the left and a 7-Eleven convenience store to the right. As I approached the mansion, I noted that the landscaping was in disarray, with no live vegetation. The outside lighting was not functioning. There was also significant debris (dismembered limbs, household trash, skeletons, etc.) on and around the driveway area.
When I came to the front door, I noted that all visible windows were unclean and full of cobwebs. I pushed the doorbell, but I found that it did not work. I then used the heavy and somewhat lubricated knocker, which appeared to be coated with a clotted-type substance. There was also a severe rodent issue, as bats suddenly swooped from the belfry. It took 1 minute, 7 seconds from the time I used the door knocker until the door was answered. The associate who opened the door was a male, approximately 7-feet tall, age undeterminate, with very short black hair
and what appeared to be electrical knobs on his neck. He was not wearing a name tag. He told me to beware the haunted mansion and to leave at once, then he closed the door. I found him to be unpolite and unwilling to help me. I wandered around the front porch for another 5 minutes waiting for another associate to help me. Finally, I knocked on the door again. A different associate opened the door, female, approximately 6-feet tall, age undeterminate, with long, upswept black hair with white streaks. She was wearing a name tag, but sitting on her shoulder was a black cat, whose tail obscured her name. The cat hissed at me, which I found to be unprofessional. The female associate was polite and friendly, asking if she could help me. I told her that my vehicle had broken down on the main road. She asked if I would like to use the telephone, and I said yes. I entered into the foyer, which had black carpeting, black paint on the walls, and a tapestry of a headless horseman on the southeast wall. The female associate asked if I would like a Bloody Mary, and I said yes. She then asked if I wanted to add an eye of newt with that, successfully upselling me.
At this point, I informed her that I was an independent contractor hired to
complete an award shop at her location. I congratulated her on completing all the required steps, and I handed her a gift certificate for $20.00 to Supercuts. She was so thrilled she uttered a bloodcurdling scream, thanked me profusely, and then slammed the door in my face.