unsent

dear matther i like you a lot
i realize you're in a relationship with someone right now
and i respect that
i would like you to know that if you're ever single in the future
and you want to come visit me in california
i would be open to spending time with you
and finding out how old you were when you wrote your first song

dear jonathan i like you too much
i used to be attracted to boys who would lie to me
and think solely about themselves
and you were plenty self-destructive for my taste at the time
i used to say the more tragic the better the truth is
whenever i think about the early 90's your face comes up
with a vengeance like it was yesterday

dear terrance i love you muchly
you've been nothing but open-hearted and emotionally available
and supportive and nurturing and consummately there for me
i kept drawing you in and pushing you away i remember
how beautiful it was to fall asleep on your couch
and cry in front of you
for the first time you were the best platform
from which to jump beyond myself
what was wrong with me

dear marcus you rocked my world
you had a charismatic way about you with women
and you got me seriously thinking about spirituality a
nd you wouldn't let me get away with kicking my own a--
but i could never really feel relaxed
and looked out from around you though
and that stopped us from going any further than we did
and it's kinda too bad because we could've had much more fun

dear lou we learned so much
i realize we won't be able to talk for some time
and i understand that as i do you
the long distance thing was the hardest
and we did as well as we could
we were together during a very tumultuous time in our lives
i will always have your back and be curious
about you and your career and whereabouts