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David Shade (http://www.davidshade.com/): Ross tells us to read "A Passion for More" by Susan Shapiro Barash, c 2001 Berkeley Hills Books, ISBN 1-893163-24-5. Ross has given us another truly outstanding recommendation. The book includes the interviews of 57 women who have had extra marital affairs.
Every woman had something missing in her marriage. Each woman filled the missing need by taking a lover. Some of the women felt guilt about it, but most did not. In all cases, the women were happy they did it, as it ultimately led her to greater enlightenment and fulfillment.
For almost all the women, they had much better sex with their lover than with their husband. For a few, the sex was better with the husband. In all cases, the woman's thoughts were consumed with the man that she had the most exciting sex.
For some women, she had great sex with the man because she felt close to him. For some women, she became close to him because she had great sex with him.
One could conclude from this book that a woman has four basic needs that must be met 1) affirmation, 2) sharing, 3) to feel like a woman, and 4) exciting sex. 1) Affirmation, in that she needs to feel appreciated and respected for the individual that she is. She needs to know that she is affirmed in her endeavors. 2) Sharing, in that she has the need to share her feelings with her man and to receive the sharing from her man. She needs to be able to "communicate" emotionally with her man and to feel that "emotional connection." 3) Feel like a woman, in that she needs to feel beautiful, sexy, and feminine. She needs to enjoy all that comes with being a woman. 4) Exciting Sex, in that she needs to be seduced, excited, and satisfied, over and over again. She needs to experience new things, in new ways, including fantasies and roles.
As I was reading this book, I thought to myself many times "Major Mark told us exactly that in his book 'Scoring with Married Women.'" In fact, it showed that every single word he wrote is absolutely true. You would understand if you had read both books.
I have taken a few quotes from the book to give you a flavor for the book.
Because these are very minimal quotes, they are thus by definition taken out
of context. Certainly, each woman's situation was more involved. But it gives
you and idea...
Honey "The sex was very good, very different. We had more oral sex than
in my marriage and the sex itself lasted longer, the time devoted to turning
each other on. The whole experience made me more sexual and that came out in
the marriage, too. In other words, I used the sex with him to aid sex with my
husband. The affair awakened me sexually. I felt more uninhibited with my lover
than with my husband. We had anal sex. He was a superb lover. I could have multiple
orgasms with him, which wasn't happening in my marriage at the time. I was obsessed
with him when he wasn't around, although we were together a few days a week.
I was happy for a brief time, then I quickly became bored. It was strictly sexual,
the relationship.
There was an excitement in the breaking of the rules, but it was emotionless,
and that is why I became bored. Still, I needed the male attention he gave to
me, something my husband wasn't giving at that time. He was too self-involved
and preoccupied with work. Once he found out, he stopped trusting me and I thought
our marriage would end. Then our sex became incredible because he knew that
it was only the sex that was different in the affair; there was no love. And
he wanted me to be happy in bed. We worked on being honest and attentive like
never before. Now my marriage is sensational, growing on every level.
Kristen "I needed him to be there to hug me and to tell me it was okay. I knew all along that this man wasn't what I wanted. But if sex was what it took, that was fine. I had to get by. The sex was all right, but nothing special. I let this one end fairly quickly."
Lucy "The sex was excellent because he was so skilled. It was a learning experience for me. At first I slept with both my husband and this man; eventually I had sex only with my lover. It was hot. We had sex every possible way. For almost a year there was an intense, hot situation. The sex was wild and continual."
Sandy "It was a wonderful sexual and emotional union and I never felt guilty. My lover adored me. He thought I was beautiful and gave me everything I wanted. The sex was loving and gentle but also uninhibited and open. We'd have sex everywhere. We did it in restaurants, in the back of the movie theatre. Wherever we were, we did it. If we went away, we'd do it on a mountain cliff, in the beach, in the car all the time, in the buggy ride in the city."
Hanna "The sex was very exciting in the beginning. I'd see him daily sometimes, other times a few days a week, so there was lots of sex. Because he accepted me, I was able to play out sexual fantasies. The fantasies were things I would have done with my husband if he'd been willing. But with my lover there was no question that he was willing. My relationship with my lover made me see myself as a whole person and I rejected my husband's needs. My lover was reinforcing. He made me feel beautiful."
Rebecca "Sex with my lover was very different than with my husband. He's more attentive. My lover gets excited talking about it and my husband wouldn't ever discuss it. I tried to seduce my husband all the time. If I began to talk with my husband he wouldn't even put down the magazine he was reading. No matter how important or trivial the matter, he ignored me. My lover listened to anything I had to say. He is the opposite of my husband in every way. Now I think of my lover as very handsome, but in the beginning my husband seemed handsomer."
Priscilla "I realized I needed attention and I sought it outside the marriage.
As soon as my husband left on Monday morning for his job and the kid went to
school, my lover came over and we spent the entire day together.
It was wonderful, absolutely fabulous. During the winter we'd spend the whole
day in bed, leaving only to prepare lunch or to retrieve the mail. The sex was
nonstop and quite different from anything I'd every expected. I became so attached
to him. It was not like any relationship I'd ever known.
The sex was terrific and we were so devoted."
Cynthia "The main attraction was sexual. He was a terrific lover and we had a great sex life all the time."
Marsha "I'd see him once a week, and we'd dance and have sex. It was incredible beyond my wildest imaginings. It became an obsession. If I couldn't see him, I'd flip. We went right to his place and made passionate love. The sex was like nothing you could ever imagine. After coming from a passionless marriage, his passionate love and sex made me crazy. We did it everywhere, on the kitchen floor, the bathroom floor, against the wall, on the bed, off the bed, you name it. I was exhausted and exhilarated and sick to my stomach at the idea of it being six in the morning and needing to drive home to my husband. On the ride home, I kept remembering the six hours of solid lovemaking and my stomach churned at the thought of it. I lied to my husband and said I'd stayed at a friend's house. From that point on, the marriage fell apart. I was bumping into walls. All I did was think of my lover and when I'd next see him. Then I began to realize that it was my husband who had the problem, not me. If my lover would so readily and continually touch me, happily, then my husband was the one who didn't get it.
Lilly "As an affair it was very exciting. The sex was fabulous when we were in that stage because there was less to lose. Once I fell hopelessly in love with him, and it was more than an affair, it was a disappointment. I have a theory that these affairs work wonderfully as affairs but as relationships they rarely work. What I see is how one fantasizes about these affairs, the sex and passion."
Maryanne "As soon as we began the affair, I began to feel good about myself. Mostly it was the sex. We share an incredible sex life."
Marla "The affair began during a bad point in my marriage. I suppose I became obsessed after a time. The sex was great. It was the best I'd ever had. We did everything. We did it against the washer and dryer. The sex was beyond belief. The best in the world. We did it on the train tracks, we did it in bars. He would masturbate me at a crowded bar. We did it in the Tavern, in the ladies room. It was wild and highly sexual."
Julie "The sex was hot and heavy, very passionate. On Wednesdays, I was off from work and we'd spend the entire day in bed at a motel. We did it for hours, having intercourse three times at least. He was very attentive and caring. He took his time and was interested in satisfying me. We never rushed through it. It was wonderful and I realized how unlike a marriage it was. Every aspect of our time together was important. I became obsessed with him and thought of him all the time. I'd drop my kid at school and rush to see him for an hour. We'd stay up all night sometimes, making love and drinking wine. My self-esteem had been low, due to a bad marriage. Then he came along. I was told I was sexy, beautiful, and smart. I felt like a woman again. I began to realize that I needed a lot from a man that I wasn't getting from my husband. Intimacy, communication, sex - I got it all from my lover. I began to identify myself as a sexual being; that was a big deal to me. And I loved the glamour of it, not just being a housewife and a mom, but having a lover with a secret world. We fulfilled each other's fantasies for a long time.
Rachel "He was absolutely magnificent. It was a relationship based on incredible sex."
Alex "As it got going, the sex happened whenever we got together. Sex was unbelievable from the start and it is even better today."
Karen "The sex in this affair is what keeps it going. It is the most amazing ever. Whenever I've been with a lover, I've had sex that goes on and on, but nothing like this. I have noticed the difference between clitoral orgasm and a vaginal orgasm. The sex with my latest lover is in a class by itself. I know the volume of orgasms is much greater with my lover than with my husband. I can't describe it. I do things with my lover that I'd never do with my husband, never. We try everything, we did it eight and ten times a night. I think of him when I'm having sex with my husband. I think about him a lot of the time."
Chelsea "We had a lot of sex. The sex was very different from the marriage.
Sex in my marriage stunk by them. It was weird how willing my lover was to try
anything and so was I. It was a completely different experience. I found myself
doing sexual things I never expected to do."
Eva "The sex was much better with my lover than with my husband, and we did it more times a day. And it was full of love. We'd spend entire days making love. I'd say to him 'Do it 'til you're raw or not at all.' We'd both be sore but happy. We had sex everywhere, on his motorcycle in the woods, and at his house we'd do it on the washing machine. It certainly was a departure from sex with my husband lying flat in bed with the lights out."
Robin "While sex with my husband has always been fine, it was not great.
With my lover, it's so incredible it's hard to give up. I'd like to make love
to him for the rest of my life. It began in a calm manner. I was cautious, a
most afraid. After all, I hadn't slept with someone else in ten years. Then
the sex became wild and crazy. We did it every way possible, we invented things.
We went beyond expectations, beyond anything I ever dreamed of. I never slept
with both men the same day. I was lucky I was able to control when I had sex
with my husband. And I never did the same things with my husband sexually. He
wouldn't ask me to, because he knew I would refuse.
But I did them with this man, gladly."
Samantha "The sex was amazing. The first time, he moved the earth."
Nicole "The relationship was sexual. It was all about sex. Sex like I'd
never known before, total abandon' no part of my body seemed uninteresting.
In fact, it was all extremely interesting to him. Nor was any part of my body
unworthy of exploration. I'd blink and hours would be gone. That was how it
seemed when we were together. I mean my eyeballs would roll. There are few men
who can stay with that kind of thing, that kind of sex. I believe it an unusual
man who puts a woman ahead of himself in bed."
Kate "Sex with him was the most wonderful experience. He was a thrilling
man, in every way. The sex was unique, always different, always incredible.
I began to feel sexual; I could demand good sex with my lover. I didn't sleep
with my husband at all."
Laura "It was a perfect affair. I could think of little else. It was all
that I ever expected it to be. We met during the day for romantic interludes.
The sex was fabulous. Half of the people in my business are having affairs.
It isn't only men who have affairs, but women too. After all, who are those
men having affairs with, only their single secretaries?
Not at all. I know that for a fact. There are so many people having them. I
believe that women have affairs because there is something in their marriage
which is lacking, boredom sets in or they are no longer in love with their husbands.
I have a whole new life. I regrouped and emerged richer."
Jessica "Sex with my husband was basically screwing, something we did
when we went to bed, after David Letterman. It was a routine like doing the
dishes. It was Letterman, brush your teeth, sex. My husband did not like oral
sex and didn't want to do it. He wanted me to do it to him though. I didn't
know this bothered me until after I had the affair. Then I realized how I felt
about it. Once I had my lover, I questioned how happy I was and what it was
I was in search of. With my lover, the sex was much more original, there was
a chemical attraction, and the actual sex lasted longer.
My lover bought me negligees and bustiers, which made the sex exciting. We took
showers together; he'd shave my pubic hair."
Anna "When I'm with him I feel beautiful, sexy, happy and yet vulnerable."
Vivien "He was an incredible lover. I think the sex was always the thing.
We became attached to each other based on this amazing physical relationship
that we shared. The situation lasted a long time. I experienced no guilt as
a result of the relationship. My life felt richer for having two lives. My husband
wasn't so interested in sex so it wasn't a big deal to sleep with another man.
I would see him as much as I could."
Camille "My time with my lover was passionate. At first the relationship was compartmentalized. I was able to handle both. My lover enhanced me so I enhanced the marriage. What my husband couldn't provide my lover would. I became complete. I wasn't only sexual but sex played a big part in it. My lover really listens to me. All our concerns were shared and paid attention to and it spills over into the sex. With someone tuned into me, it's a remarkable difference. I hadn't experienced this love, I would believe most love affairs are really only about sex. But I know how much more it is than that."
Piaffe "I think of it as a relationship about fulfilling dreams not fulfilled by my marriage. This lover was terrific, a dreamy kind of man. I'd never met anyone so exciting and charming. I saw him several times and each time it had that heat. There was intimacy, great, frequent sex, companionship, a sharing of thoughts and feelings."
Jane "I began to understand that the affair had occurred because I was lacking something in my marriage. If someone else fills the void, then that other relationship works for you. It carried me through a bad time. I happened to believe that affairs do make marriages bearable. It was about sex and fun. He'd come over during the morning and we'd have this hot sex and passion. I realized that having an affair while you're married is different. Then the affair is an escape. But if you're not married, that escape isn't necessary."
Randy "I was definitely in love with my lover. The sex was terrific and I learned many things, things I'd never learned in twenty years of marriage."
Barbara "The sex was excellent. It was very different than with my husband and every time we were together we had sex. I had no difficulty juggling two different lives. As long as nothing got mixed together, I was fine. I loved both men. If you have fifteen children you love them all. Why can't you love all of your men?"
And finally, here is a letter that showed up in a national publication.
Major Mark read it to his students in his course "Building a Better Girlfriend."
"I'm a single average looking business man in my mid forties.
During the past three years I've slept with every married woman I have desired.
I meet them in super markets, bookstores, and record shops.
I invite them for coffee, and the rest is easy.
From these encounters, I have observed the following 1. I've not met a woman
whose husband has made love to her properly in the past six months.
2. Many of these women had never had a multiple orgasm. Two had never had orgasms
until we went to bed.
3. None of these women experienced any major guilt from these encounters.
4. Most view themselves as neglected, and view our time as luxurious sin.
In the mean time, I've collected a casual harem.
I'm never pushy, they call me.
Can you explain why so many men are such neglectful lovers?" Signed T.G.
I can highly recommend both of the books "A Passion for More" and "Scoring with Married Women." They will give you a much better understanding of women. In order to understand women, you must study women. If you truly love women, you will find this easy to do.
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Magic Juan:
(On Stephanie) A person who needs to be trained to speak on how to get a woman
in one's life likely doesn't really have much to offer to begin with.
You can't show me one single person in our societies who has not been trained
on how to speak to others. Nor can you show me one of those people who didn't
need that training, since we weren't born with it. We were all trained by the
people around us: family, friends, neighbors, school teachers, whatever. In
many cases, many of us have sought better training -- rather than the random
training we got from well-meaning but ignorant people -- from those who have
actually taken the time to pay closer attention. And quite plainly, if you have
trouble with people who want to be trained on how to speak in order to form
better relationships with women, you are clearly on the wrong mailing list,
because that is exactly the topic of it.
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CEO:
This is my frame. It's along the same lines of Mystery/Sis "Negs/Bratty
little sister". It's something I learned and have been using since Junior
year in college. I never could pin point what I was doing until Mystery/Sis
put labels on it. Now looking back, I can realize what I've been doing and use
it more efficiently in the future. In college after being crushed (and an AFC)
for the last time by this girl, I took my frame from rap songs (Snoop, B.I.G.,
Dre, Easy E-). I turned my college girlfriend into a field experiment. I gave
her everything she needed, but on my terms. I actually reminded myself to be
mean to her. I had perfect timing....just as she was about to get upset that
I was hanging out with the boys, drinking too much....whatever, I would surprise
her with something nice, gifts, take her out, or just tell her something nice.
I stopped kissing ass and girls were falling in love with me. My confidence
was through the roof. I now found it a compliment when girls called me a jerk
or an asshole (they would say it in an half serious way:
HB: are you going to walk me home?
CEO: No
HB: jerk.
CEO: <Smile>)
A few months ago, I came up with my own frame. It's useful to me, because I
believe you can be a gentleman and not supplicate at the same time. It is possible
to do both. Look at Frank Sinatra. This guy had class, always a gentleman and
never, ever supplicated. He was always in control. Being a gentleman alone has
gotten me noticed, because I am congruent. I hold doors open for all women,
the beauties and the beasts, the young and the old.
It's much more powerful for a girl to see you do an act of kindness (without
something to gain), than if you tell her you're a real gentleman.
It's even more powerful than treating her nice (kissing ass). Once a girl sees
that you're a great guy by the way you treat others (waiters, bus drivers, pets
...etc.) and that image is conditioned in her mind, then it's hard for her to
think any other way. She'll rationalize the way you treat her and it will be
more of a challenge. Here's my frame: "Treat her like a Queen, but remember
who's KING". Think about this. Two scenarios: one comes from a King and
one comes from a Joker. Both men are treating a woman like a Queen. The Queen
gets everything she wants, but only one of them can keep her interest. THE JOKER
entertains, he's constantly looking for approval.
He gets her what she wants when she wants, always. He even showers her with
gifts in hopes she'll like him more. He is a "yes" man. He waits until
he is called, and she orders him around. He works around the Queen's schedule.
The Joker also entertains the King. The Joker entertains and the King gets the
benefits. The King also supplies the Queen with what she needs. The King has
other duties and responsibilities. He has his own schedule. He has to control
his kingdom. He gives the Queen gifts when he wants to. He hires a joker to
entertain her. He exudes power and confidence. She knows from the start what
she is getting into and her role in the relationship. The King does things to
please his Queen, not to seek approval. Either way a woman is treated with respect.
Both men are true gentlemen (in theory).
It's your choice. Do you want to be a KING or a JOKER? So "Treat her like
a Queen, But remember who's KING"---- - This frame can also apply to women.
I lose interest in girls who kiss my ass all the time. My ex-girlfriend would
get mad at me and ask me if "we can argue now?" I would say NO, and
there was no argument. I always tell girls who accuse me of being nice that
"I'm not a nice guy, I do nice things".
PART 2: Below is a list of Negs, Openers, and just plain funny things that I
say while keeping this frame in mind.
CEO originals:
1) I say excuse me "You look almost as good as me tonight".. <they
laugh> then I say "I mean it <joking tone> I'm not just saying
it, I mean it" 2)HB: I went to Harvard
CEO: "what happened, couldn't get into PSU (insert your college)?"
3)HB: I live in Long Island, NY
CEO: Oh my God, we're neighbors
HB: Where do you live?
CEO: Hoboken, NJ
HB: <laughs>
CEO: Yeah, can you believe it. We're only 50 miles apart. If you need a to borrow
a cup of sugar,<pause> ask someone else. I don't cook.
4) CEO: Hey, I have a (shirt/skirt/hat) just like that at home (talking a girl
wearing something sexy, obviously feminine) CEO: I was going to wear it today.
That would have been embarrassing. You would have to go home and change
5) CEO: I think that two months' salary for a ring is too little.
When I get married I'm going to use 3 months' salary. So when I'm ready, I'm
going to quit my job and work at Burger King. But every penny is going to the
ring. I'm going to get her the biggest Diamondelle (which is almost as rare
as glass). If you don't think Diamondelle's shine, you're mistaken...Her hand
will be dragging from the weight of it. All her friends will be jealous.
6) HB: If a girl is fixing her make-up and has her compact out: CEO: <I'll
position myself behind her so my reflection is in the mirror or say Hey! And
ask to see it>
CEO: Then I'll say "Why do you have a picture of me in your purse".
I'll take it and look at it. Smile, while I'm looking at the reflection and
say "It's a good one. This is a good looking kid."
Steve Martin:
I put girls on a pedestal...High enough to look up their dress.
Johnny Bravo:
Hey, Baby. I know what you're thinking. How did a statue get off its pedestal?
Don't worry, I'm real.
A Friend:
1) I want to know how you look when I'm naked. (then he takes their hand like
he's going to kiss it, but kisses his own hand instead) 2) My friend was looking
at pictures and saw an old picture of this girl.
HIM: Who's This?
Former HB: That's me!!!!!
HIM: No it's not, SHE'S HOT.
(This girl did gain about 50 lbs since that picture, but I think it's hilarious
and would make for a good neg.)
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Adam:
I got this article from About.com ... from the "Dating Tips For Women"
section. It is written from the woman's perspective, but I thought it really
hit the nail on the head:
Why "Nice Guys" are often such LOSERS
You hear it all the time: "He was such a NICE Guy, and she's such a Heartless
Bitch for dumping him." I get letters from self-professed Nice Guys, complaining
that women must WANT to be treated like shit, because THEY, the "Nice Guy"
have failed repeatedly in relationships. This is akin to the false logic that
"Whales are mammals. Whales live in the sea.
Therefore, all mammals live in the sea." If you have one bad relationship
after another, the only common denominator is YOU. Think about it. What's wrong
with Nice Guys? The biggest problem is that most Nice Guys (tm) are hideously
insecure. They are so anxious to be liked and loved that they do things for
other people to gain acceptance and attention, rather than for the simple pleasure
of giving. You never know if a Nice Guy really likes you for who you are, or
if he has glommed onto you out of desperation because you actually paid some
kind of attention to him. Nice Guys exude insecurity -- a big red target for
the predators of the world. There are women out there who are "users"
-- just looking for a sucker to take advantage of. Users hone-in on "Nice
Guys", stroke their egos, take them for a ride, add a notch to their belts,
and move on. It's no wonder so many Nice Guys complain about women being horrible,
when so often the kind of woman that get's attracted to them is the lowest form
of life...
Self-confident, caring, decent-hearted women find "Nice Guys" to be
too clingy, self-abasing, and insecure. Nice Guys go overboard. They bring roses
to a "let's get together for coffee" date. They try to buy her affections
with presents and fancy things. They think they know about romance, but their
timing is all wrong, and they either come-on too strong, too hard and too fast,
OR, they are so shy and unassertive, that they hang around pretending to be
"friends", in the hope that somehow, someway, they will get the courage
up to ask her out for a "date". They are so desperate to please that
they put aside their own needs, and place the object of their desire on a pedestal.
Instead of appreciating her, they worship her.
We are only human, and pedestals are narrow, confining places to be -- not to
mention the fact that we tend to fall off of them. They cling to her, and want
to be "one" with her for fear that if she is out of sight, she may
disappear or become attracted to someone else. A Nice Guy often has trouble
with emotional intimacy, because he believes that if he learns about the REAL
person inside, she will no longer love him. Nice Guys are always asking HER
to make the decisions. They think it's being equitable, but it puts an unfair
burden of responsibility on her, and gives him the opportunity to blame her
if the decision was an unwise one. Nice Guys rarely speak up when something
bothers them, and rarely state clearly what it is they want, need and expect.
They fear that any kind of conflict might spell the end of the relationship.
Instead of compromising and negotiating, they repeatedly "give in".
When she doesn't appreciate their sacrifice, they will complain that, "Everything
I did, I did for her," as if this somehow elevates them to the status of
martyrs. A woman doesn't want a martyr. She wants an equal, caring, adult partner.
Nice Guys think that they will never meet anyone as special as she is. They
use their adoration as a foundation for claiming that "no one will ever
love her as much as I do." Instead of being a profound statement of their
devotion, this is a subtle, but nasty insult. It is akin to saying to her: "You
are a difficult person, and only *I* can ever truly love you, so be thankful
I'm here." The Nice Guy -needs- to believe that he is the best person for
the object of his desires, because otherwise his insecurities will overrun him
with jealousies and fear. The truth of the matter is that there are many people
out there who can be a good match for her. We rarely stop loving people we truly
care about. Even if we no longer continue the relationship, the feelings will
continue... But love isn't mutually exclusive. We can (and do) love many people
in our lives, and romantic love is really no different. Though he may love her
immensely, there will likely be other people who have loved her just as much
in her past, and will love her just as much in the future. The irony of it all
is: "Who would want to go out with someone who was inherently unlovable
anyways?" More than loving the woman in his life, a Nice Guy NEEDS her.
"She is my Life, my only source of happiness..." YECH! What kind of
a burden is that to place on her? That SHE has to be responsible for YOUR happiness?
Get a grip! Another mistake Nice Guys make is to go after "hard luck"
cases. They deliberately pick women with neuroses, problems, and personality
disorders, because Nice Guys are "helpers". A Nice Guy thinks that
by "helping" this woman, it will make him a better, more lovable person.
He thinks it will give him a sense of accomplishment, and that she will appreciate
and love him more, for all his efforts and sacrifice. He is usually disappointed
by the results. This ultimately boils down to the fact that Nice Guys don't
like themselves. Is it any wonder women don't like them? In order to truly love
someone else, you must first love yourself. Too often Nice Guys mistake obsession
for "love". Get this Guys: INSECURITY ISN'T SEXY. IT'S A TURNOFF.
You don't have to be an ego-inflated, arrogant jerk. You just have to LIKE yourself.
You have to know what you want out of life, and go after it. Only then will
you be attractive to the kind of woman with whom a long-term relationship is
possible.
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PRODUCTS AND LINKS (There's some NEW STUFF in here, and I will try and put something new in here as often as possible):
For those of you who are just reading about this for the first time, I decided a couple of emails ago to add links to these emails. The idea would be to get enough money in to hire someone to take over the administrative work (and also to buy things which would improve this list, such as proper mailing list software) for this list. If you were going to buy the product anyway, just use the link that appears below and you are helping to keep this list going at no extra cost to anyone.
NON SEDUCTION-RELATED SITES
One of the more useful links I have set up is to amazon.com -- I know I buy
a lot from them and I am sure that many of you also do. So I arranged a link
with them and you can now buy from them and help out this email newsletter at
the same time. If anyone has any other suggestions of sites that would be a
good one for me to set up a link to, please let me know.
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/redirect-home/nositeihaveap-20 For those in
the U.K., this should work: http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/redirect-home?tag=cliffslist-21&site=amazon
Here's a way for you to accept credit cards on your site today: http://zzz.clickbank.net/r/?cliffslist
RECOMMENDED LIST
DOUBLE YOUR DATING One of the best places for you to start your journey on becoming more successful with women would be to get David DeAngelo's Double Your Dating e-book. David (who posts here under the name "Sisonpyh" -- which is "hypnosis" spelled backwards) is a good friend that I have known for several years now that I originally met through one of Ross's Speed Seduction seminars. His posts here have been among the most outstanding contributions I have had over the years and his book (and the free bonuses) is highly recommended. http://www.doubleyourdating.com/cl/
HOW TO SUCCEED WITH WOMEN Ron Louis and David Copeland have been reading these
emails for awhile and recently sent me their Mastery Program Tape series which
I have finished listening to. It has some very good stuff on it and that, in
combination with other pieces that you can pick up here and from the other products
mentioned can be a help. For those who are just starting out learning how to
deal with women, this is an excellent basic daily course to take you through
the process of dealing with women. For those who are more advanced, you should
pick up a few good ideas from this set of tapes.
http://www.howtosucceedwithwomen.com/cgi-bin/at.cgi?a=169700
SEVEN MAGIC WORDS
Comments on this product from Tony B.:
I thought I might drop you a quick line regarding some of the more popular sites
that have been seen within this "seduction community." After seeing
several terrible reviews and "flames" from alt.seduction.fast, I decided
to make a decision for myself based upon my own ideas of what could be offered
on the Seven Magic Words product and after several months of reading great novels
about how to attract women and multiple posts about how women are most attracted
to men, I STILL found the site to be beneficial. After joining the site, I was
happy to learn all the new techniques that I have never seen on any list and
that alone made it worth the money. I am not typically the type of person that
spends money on a site especially a seduction site, I would rather pay for some
audio or video, but the information that was offered was different and unequal
to anything I have seen in the past. At any rate, I know you wanted a review..
and I have actually come to know the owner, and he puts more attention in his
members area than I would expect to see from any other site.
http://hop.clickbank.net/?cliffslist/smackudown
DATING INSIDER Not only does this next site give you an unconditional 1 year
no risk money back guarantee, but it stands alone and it's program is unmatched.
Right now they're doing a Free Trial period, and I'd take advantage of this
while you can. The site reads "Learn the proven secrets for meeting, attracting,
and seducing women. From A - Z, you'll discover the most advanced techniques
for picking up women ever developed." Check out their Free Trial (before
it ends) and you'll see why their members like this program so much. Click on
http://www.dating-insider.com/international/welcome.html.
How to Lay Girls Guide The ultimate SEDUCTION SECRETS database: http://www.layguide.com/cgi-bin/affiliates/clickthru.cgi?id=Cliffslist
THE UNKNOWN! (Not reviewed)
HYPNO-TECH Here's another one which I think has been reviewed here in the past
but I haven't gone through the old emails to check. "Do You Want To Know
A Simple, Two Minute Hypnotic Technique That Lets YOU Secretly Put Any Woman
Into An Instant Trance And Persuades Her To Ask YOU Out?
http://hop.clickbank.net/?cliffslist/hypnotech
ADVANCED MACKING Advanced Macking has one of the most enticing websites. An
updated review would also be welcome.
http://links.verotel.com/cgi-bin/showsite.verotel?vercode=66629804000000274976
This one also looked pretty interesting. The link for more information on breakups and loving-styles is http://hop.clickbank.net/?cliffslist/Tigress
Success Secrets Our free newsletter reveals it all Money and Personal Finance
secrets; Business & Marketing secrets; Health, Fitness, and Weight-Loss
advice; Self Defense secrets; Memory Improvement tips; Smart Advice on Flirting,
Dating, Sex, and Relationships; Personal Development tips; Communication and
Negotiation tips; Tax Secrets & Loopholes!
Investment and Stock Market tips; and Much More http://hop.clickbank.net/?cliffslist/prodeskcom
The Ultimate Guide to Powerful Relationships is only $8.95 and looks very interesting. Comments, please. http://hop.clickbank.net/?cliffslist/unicades
Here's a new one I found which needs to be reviewed: "Guys! Get More Pussy
with our Adult Personals Inside Secrets Guide! Plus! Free Survey Results of
Women Using Personals for Sex The Guide contains the following Inside Secrets
Replying to ads - how to get noticed and get a date for hot sex.
Placing ads - how to beat the competition and get lots of replies How to handle
follow up communication to keep her interested. Examples of replies that worked
on us. You can just copy and paste these into your ads or replies. Saves you
time and increases your chances! A directory of the best websites for meeting
hot women! Sick of chicks who are only into cybersex and nothing else! The Guide
contains a list of the best adult personals sites."
http://secure.ibill.com/cgi-win/ccard/rscookie.exe?RevShareID=9804000000274976&returnto=http://www.mysexinfo.com<http://www.mysexinfo.com/
Secrets of Power Persuasion! A course by Jian Wang to teach you how to write
hypnotic language to make others obey your command.
http://hop.clickbank.net/?cliffslist/mrchange
Arte's New Sex Video is kind of interesting. He shows a lot about playing with a woman's g spot (which he demonstrates on his comely girlfriend - but I could have done without seeing your dick, Arte). I will do a more extensive review after I have watched it again more carefully: http://amos.simonweb.com/loveebook/affiliates/clickthru.cgi?id=lrec
HERE'S A NEW ONE
Suspect your spouse of cheating on you? Check this out http://hop.clickbank.net/?cliffslist/spouse1
FREE PLUGS
The following are all recommended but clicking on the links and buying from
them doesn't send any money back here (it is also recommended that the sponsors
of these sites consider setting this up -- from the little experience I have
had since I started the commercial section a couple of weeks ago, I think you
are missing a lot of business by not doing this) http://www.speed-seduction.com/
- The # 1 source; read the free newsletters & get the basic course.
http://www.trucor.com/ - Major Mark's site, the place to learn hypnosis and
about married women
http://www.essential-skills.com/ - learn anchoring, tonality, rapport, goal
getting, etc.
http://www.davidshade.com/ Give women incredible pleasure get David Shade's
Manual
http://www.fastseduction.com/ - great resource, a must visit http://www.sosuave.com/
- lots of free materials, many good ideas and articles http://www.mindcontrolmanual.com/
- seduce men and women through the power of the mind
http://www.oscarbruce.com/ - All his books deal with perusasion, manipulation
and a mild form of seduction. Books like School for Scoundrels focus on getting
your way with people and getting them to see things your way.
Get on Mystery's Lounge - send him an email at [email protected] with
REQUEST MEMBERSHIP in the subject line. Include your REAL name, your experience,
background in the PUA, some online PUA's who can vouch for you (references),
and a real pic of yourself. If you do not wish to give this REAL information,
don't join. Only the PRO's are in there anyways - we discuss lots of stuff but
it's the REAL pix of our conquests and the fact that we don't HIDE who we are
to each other that makes it appealing. MANY of the members Mystery has personally
sarged with. The rule is simple don't fuck up anyone's game. If you can abide
by that and have a track record for contributing, then that's basically good
as gold. Pix are a requirement, however. The Lounge is in many ways an EXTENSION
of Cliff's List and is not an alternative. You don't have to be a PRO, but you
MUST play the game. If you are only WANTING to ONE DAY chase skirts, please
don't bother joining.
Mystery is now offering his in-field Mystery Method (MM) BASIC TRAINING workshop
in several cities. Click http://mysterymethod.1avenue.com/ for more information,
workshop locations, dates & to sign up.
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New Links to be explored (WE NEED THESE REVIEWED!):
1) The website reads as follows and we need someone's review of this: "Impress
everybody! Make your life happen on purpose! Matthew Whiting an English and
Psychology graduate from Canterbury University and later a graduate of The National
Academy of Performing Arts, has created this revolutionary step-by-step training
system which will give you the means to becoming irresistibly attractive. Hence
enabling you to gain the relationship and life that you want. Whether it is
on stage or in real life we all know the "x" factor when we see it!
But can we produce our own individual "x factor"? In this book Matthew
Whiting's radical new approach to "being irresistibly attractive"
will show you how to: Master these personal strategies to become more Charismatic:
· Learn how to be master of your own intention · Taking action
· Being a successful leader
· Learning confidence
· ...and a lot more...
Master these personal strategies for more Passion: · How to be funny
· Leaving a lasting impression
· How to utilize the power of speech
· Extraordinary kissing
· Flirting - a delightful, innocent, and respectful way to play with
each other!
· ...and a lot more...(18 Chapters in total!) This book is jam-packed
with tons of information, (185 A4-size pages). It is written in a tongue-in-cheek
manner which is easy to follow, and you are sure to enjoy. Once you experience
the marvelous changes that Matthew Whiting enables you to make, you can shape
your relationships and other life circumstances exactly as you'd like them to
be." http://hop.clickbank.net/?cliffslist/unicades
2) How to create sexual chemistry! This one looks interesting -- we need a
review!
http://www.attractwomennow.com/cgi-bin/affiliates/clickthru.cgi/Cliffslist
3) Welcome to CheekyCherry.co.uk, home of what has been called the bible of
'attracting women, keeping them and sleeping with them'.
http://www.cheekycherry.co.uk/Main_categories/seduction_and_dating/dating_guide.html
4) Courses for women to seduce men!
http://www.ihrt.co.uk/seductionsystems/text%20gals.htm
5) Guys Guide to Girls - A guide to relationships. How to overcome shyness and understand your partner... http://www.philipov.com/guys1.htm
6) Wally's Seduction Tips for Desperate Bachelors http://www.wallyandmurk.com/wally/sedution/Wallymag.html
7) Help with seduction - for women who want to seduce men.
http://www.seducehim.com/
8) The website reads as follows and we need someone's review of this: "Ladies!
Never date a stranger unless you've checked him out first!
Fortunately, a basic background check is an easy thing to do, via the telephone
and the Internet. In just a matter of minutes, you can find out a great deal
on your own about any potential date (or even your fiance' or husband) using
the simple, free background check techniques described in our new "how-to"
manual.
CHECK HIM OUT FIRST! "Check Him Out! - The American Woman's Guide to Background
Investigations" guides you through the entire background check process
using clear, nontechnical language. You'll be amazed to learn that there's a
lot that can be done just by using the telephone intelligently!
Without even touching a computer, you can usually verify someone's name, address,
age, occupation, and even marital status over the telephone if you know which
government public records office to call and what information to ask for. "Check
Him Out!" is written for you -- the American woman with no knowledge of
public records and background checks, but with a need to do some quick basic
checking. It's easy to follow, and while it won't make you a seasoned "gumshoe,"
it will make you quite knowledgeable about the subject and will teach you all
you need to know to conduct a thorough basic background check on your own --
plus, it will show you where and how to get competent, reasonably priced help
if you later decide you want a more complex, in-depth background check done.
All this for $11.95 is hard to beat!" http://hop.clickbank.net/?cliffslist/washres
9) The website reads as follows and we need someone's review of this: "Learn
how to talk to chicks and get them wet DURING the conversation.
Improve your style! Give yourself a make over, you will be able to look like
a STUD. My Original Proven-to-work, pickup lines. My Secret Cologne that guaranteed
to attract girls like a powerful magnet (Guaranteed to work everytime). How
to get the perfect pair of lips without surgery. Voice Secret - How to make
your voice sweet. (this will turn any woman on). Types of Girls - Detail Explanations
on Poor Girls, to High-Class girls. How to tell which girl is rich, and how
to impress a certain type of girls. Smooth Lines to use in any conversation."
http://hop.clickbank.net/?cliffslist/recognize1
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