Exeter Zoowatch

Monkey

Hot breaking news! Darwin�s theories seem to have been proven right. Binky, the Chimpanzee from Devon zoo seems to have evolved. This was discovered.., well I think I'll let him tell us himself.
Hiya Mark! I'm Binky, I'm a monkey, I've just evolved.
So how did everyone find out about this?
You�ll have to speak up Mark, they�re only allowing me a shoddy mobile phone.
How did they find out you�d evolved.
Well, some kid threw a notepad and pen into the cage in the zoo, and the after I did a bit of experimentation, poking the other monkeys with the pen and that, I worked out this writing business, and banged out a couple of works of Shakespeare.
A couple of works of Shakespeare?!
Well... I suppose it is a bit of a clich�...
A bit of a clich�! Its hardly a very original idea! Everyone always goes on about an infinite number of monkeys, with an infinite number of typewriters doing that!
Actually, with the dawn of the Internet that theory has been disproven. And anyway, at that point I'd only just evolved, I didn�t know any better.
What about talking- how did you manage to do that??
Talking? Oh, you mean the moving lips about and that.
That's the one.
Well, it�s hardly very hard.
Hardly very hard! Hardly very hard! It�s the single most distinguishing feature of the human species!
Not very good if you don�t mind me saying. You don�t even have tails.
We don�t need tails.
How do you swing from tree to tree then?
We don�t need to.. were civilised.
What�s that then?
Well, learning, culture and that.
Do you mean your schools?
That�s a part of it.
Well that�s hardly something to brag about. I was taken to one yesterday for the children to look at. Might I add that they were complete animals. Anyway, when I was there I got five A levels, and thirty four GNVQ�s. Wait <scribble> thirty five, just finished another one.
Well, there�s more to culture- like music and things!
Does that include Steps?
Well... I suppose technically...
What�s that all about then?
Um...
Excuse me mark but some tourists have just arrived and I've got to entertain them.
Well, thank you very much, Binky the monkey!
Hey! You! Look at my big red arse! Got a banana!