| Fuhgeddaboutit! (continued) |
| SPEAK EASY Inc. - Canada's Organization For People Who Stutter - presents: |
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| I trained myself to forget my instances of stuttering. At the end of each day, I made myself remember all the positives of the day: the work I had accomplished, the errands I had run, the feel of the sun on my face, the invigorating taste of a breath of spring air... anything would work, as long as it was positive rather than negative. I soon began to have fond memories of each day's accomplishments rather than failures of stuttering. As a result, my focus shifted away from my stuttering and it lost its grip on my life. Nor would I allow myself to forecast my stuttering, to look forward in the day and anticipate situations in which I would stutter. For many stutterers, anticipation becomes apprehension. We scan the immediate future and predict possible instances of stuttering. The closer they get, the more apprehensive we become. By the time the situation arrives, we have created a self-fulfilling prophecy. We are fully prepared to stutter -- so we do. Instead, I trained myself to dismiss my apprehension. I would fuhgeddaboutit. The moment I detected myself predicting stuttering, I forced myself to replace such thoughts. To deny my stuttering prophecy, I would busy myself thinking about other things -- how much change I had in my pocket, who would win the baseball pennant this year, did my car need an oil change, how high is up, where does my lap go when I stand up -- anything to prevent self-fulfilling prophecy. And it worked! The more I forced myself to fuhgeddaboutit -- to forget about stuttering --- the less I stuttered! Once I stopped setting myself up to fail, I stopped failing! Without the apprehension and reinforcing memories of stuttering, I began to replace the negative with the positive. Instead of storing up negative memories of stuttering, I acquired positive memories of communication. And I continued to build on this positive attitude. Every evening, before I went to sleep, I trained myself to recount the day's activities, remember the accomplishments, and reinforce the positives. Just think! I spent all those early years trying to fight my stuttering. No one cared as much about my stuttering as I did, and I gave it far more importance than it deserved. My world revolved around my stuttering and the effect that it was having on my life. Nothing worked... so I moved onto the next "sure thing." All that wasted time! It wasn't until much later that I finally got the message. I truly wish that someone had taught me that lesson when I was young. It seems so simple: Remember to forget about stuttering! Duh? Fuhgeddaboutit! |