| sCrUBBY Jokes |
| Q: Why are Cubs fans like laxatives? A: Because they irritate the crap out of you. |
| Q: How do you brainwash a Cubs fan? A: Piss in his underwear. |
| Q: What's the difference between Bigfoot and a smart Cubs fan? A: Bigfoot has been sighted before. |
| Bill Buckner tried to kill himself the other day by jumping in front of a bus. Luckily it went right through his legs. |
| Q: What is the difference between Wrigley Field & a porcupine? A: A porcupine has 35,000 pricks on the outside. |
| Three baseball fans were on their way to a game when one noticed a foot sticking out of the bushes by the side of the road. They stopped and discovered a nude female drunk. Out of respect and propriety, the White Sox fan took off his cap and placed it over her right breast. the Cardinals fan took off his cap and placed it over her left breast. Following their lead the Cubs fan took off his cap and placed it over her crotch. The police were called and when the officer arrived, he conducted his inspection. First, he lifted up the Sox cap, replaced it, then wrote down some notes. Then he lifted up the Cardinals cap, replaced it, then wrote down some more notes. The officer then lifted up the Cubs cap, replaced it, then lifted it up again, replaced it, and lifted it up a third time and replaced it one last time. The Cubs fan was getting upset and asked "What are you? A pervert or something? Why do you keep lifting and looking, lifting and looking?" "Well," said the Officer, "I am surprised. Normally when I look under a Cubs hat, I find an a$$hole" |
| A first grade teacher was a die-hard Cubs fan. She told the class to raise their hands if they were true Cubs fans like her. The children, not knowing what a Cubs fan was, raised their hands. They too wanted to be just like the teacher, all except one little girl. She did not raise her hand. The teacher approached her and asked, "Why aren't you a Cubs fan? They are the best team and I love them." The little girl responded, "I'm a Sox fan." The teacher asked, "Why are you a Sox fan?" The little girl said, "Well, my parents are Sox fans." The teacher, getting upset at this point, stated, "Just because your parents are Sox fans doesn't make you one. What if your dad was a moron and your mom was an idiot, what would that make you?" The little girl thought for a moment and said, "Well, that would make me a Cubs fan." |
| Q: What does a mama bear on birth control and the World Series have in common? A: No Cubs. |