THE TELLER'S TALES We open in an adult store, travelling across the room full of adult movies and "toys",through a doorway in the back of the room that's closed off by a curtain,and into a dimly lit back room. In one corner of the room is a man sitting at a computer, and on the computer is The Teller's Tales website. The Teller is on his webcam. THE TELLER Today's Tale deals with the most painful and potentially deadly human emotion there is. Love. I found it in a local newspaper and since it deals with many different sorts of Double Ds, I felt that would be a fitting title. And if you're the kind of freak that has a problem with a little sexual content,turn away now. If not,here is- EPISODE 10: DOUBLE D Red neon light fills the screen. We pull back from the light to see that it's part of a sign on a wall in- INT. A STRIP CLUB-THE LIGHT IS A BEER SIGN BEHIND THE BAR. WE PULL BACK FROM THE BAR AND LOOK AROUND THE CLUB. The club is nearly full tonight. Some groups of friends are drinking heavily and laughing loudly, other men are sitting alone in the shadows. There are three stages and on all three are strippers. Currently stripping are PEACHES,DANA,and CHRISTA. None of the girls have breasts under double D's. In a back corner is the announcer/D.J. doing a little dance of his own. Standing infront of the D.J.'s booth is CHAD. He's staring in awe at Dana,who is topless and swinging around the metal pole at the end of the stage. Beside the D.J.'s booth is a hallway, with three doors on one side and two on the other. The two aren't important right now, but the three are "nudie booths". A man walks out of one of the nudie booths,swaying from being drunk,and zipping his pants. The D.J. sees this but Chad is still staring at Dana. The D.J. looks at Chad as the nudie booth patron brushes past him. D.J. Hey! Chad continues staring at Dana. D.J. Hey! D.J. slaps Chad on the back of the head,and this gets his attention. CHAD What? D.J. Get to work jizz mopper! Booth 2 was just cleared! CHAD Oh...Ok. Chad turns to head down the hallway,but takes one last look back at Dana. Dana has finished her dance and is walking off stage. She spots Chad and smiles at him. Chad smiles back and heads down the hall. D.J. That's it for the lovely Dana tonight folks, give her a hand! The crowd applauds. INT. BOOTH 2-CHAD ENTERS WITH A BOTTLE OF WINDEX AND A ROLL OF PAPER TOWELS,WEARING RUBBER GLOVES, AND STARTS CLEANING THE GLASS IN THE FRONT OF THE ROOM. Beyond the glass is darkness. CHAD Lovely fucking job... Dana's voice suddenly fills the room. DANA (over speaker) Chad? Chad knocks on the glass to confirm that he's in the booth. DANA (over speaker) Put in some money. Chad sets the Windex and paper towels aside and takes off his gloves, then reaches into his pants pocket and pulls out a handful of change. He puts some of the change in a slot beside the window. The room beyond is filled with a dim yellow light. The room is very small,and in the middle is a chair. Sitting in the chair is Dana,in a bikini. CHAD Hey Dana. DANA Hi. How are you doing tonight? CHAD Alright I guess... Same as usual. DANA You're so much better than this job, you know. CHAD I think everybody on Earth is better than this job. DANA Then why don't you quit? CHAD I don't know. (beat) But if I did quit,I wouldn't be see you anymore. DANA You wouldn't stop by to visit? I thought we were closer than that. CHAD We are. I would visit. DANA You want a show tonight? CHAD Sure. If you want to give one,that is. DANA I'm always ready to give you a show. Sit back in the chair. CHAD Ok. Chad turns to the chair in the booth and inspects it. He picks up the Windex,sprays the chair,wipes it off with a paper towel,then sets the tools of his trade aside again and sits down in the chair. DANA You ready? CHAD Yes. Dana begins giving Chad a private show,and Chad unzips his pants. EXT. THE STRIP CLUB-THE SIGN ON THE FRONT SAYS: DOUBLE D'S. The door opens and Dana, now in jeans and a T-shirt, and Chad walk out, talking. DANA Did you notice Peaches got another set of implants? CHAD No. She must be huge now. DANA The girl looks set to burst. It's scary to watch her dance. You didn't notice? CHAD No, I don't really pay attention to the other girls. I just watch you. DANA Aww, you're so sweet. Dana grabs Chad by the arm and gives him a quick kiss on the cheek. Chad blushes and looks around nervously. A good as new '76 Camaro roars into the parking lot and Dana lets go of Chad's arm. DANA There's my ride. CHAD How's it going with Ted? DANA Not that great, we've been having fights quite a bit lately. CHAD Why? DANA He's been bugging me to quit. CHAD Quit dancing? DANA Yeah... The car pulls up infront of Chad and Dana. DANA Hold that thought. Dana opens the car's passenger door. Sitting in the driver's seat is Dana's husband TED. DANA Hi hon. TED Hey. Who's your friend? DANA You've met Chad before... TED Oh yeah. How's it goin' Chad? CHAD Good. How are you? TED You're the jizz mopper right? CHAD Um,I... DANA Chad does clean out the booths,but don't call him that. TED Why not? He does mop jizz doesn't he? DANA Don't be an asshole. TED Alright, shut your door and let's get outta here. Dana grabs her door and starts to pull it shut. DANA See ya Chad. CHAD See ya. TED You keep that cum cleaned up buddy! Dana shuts her door. Chad watches as the car drives out of the parking lot. He sighs, then turns around and walks back to the club. FADE TO BLACK. OPEN AGAIN ON: EXT. DOUBLE D'S-THE NEXT NIGHT. INT. DOUBLE D'S-SCENE'S PRETTY MUCH THE SAME AS IT WAS THE NIGHT BEFORE, BUT ON THE THREE STAGES ARE PEACHES, CHRISTA,AND MIA. Chad is once again standing by the D.J.'s booth, but since Dana isn't dancing he's just looking around. He turns to the D.J., who is once again doing a dorky dance of his own. CHAD Where's Dana? D.J. What? D.J. stops dancing and leans forward so he can hear Chad better. CHAD Where's Dana tonight? D.J. She called in sick. CHAD Oh... In the hallway a man exits one of the nudie booths and Chad heads off to do his job. EXT. DOUBLE D'S-LATER-THE CLUB IS CLOSING FOR THE NIGHT AND CHAD IS WALKING OUT TO HIS CAR,LOOKING DEPRESSED. He gets in the car,a rusty yellow station wagon,starts it up,and drives out of the parking lot. The car sputters as it goes. FADE OUT. OPEN AGAIN ON: EXT. DOUBLE D'S-THE NEXT NIGHT. INT. DOUBLE D'S-THE GIRLS ON STAGE ARE ONCE AGAIN PEACHES, CHRISTA,AND MIA. Chad is in his usual spot infront of the D.J.'s booth, leaning against the wall and just staring into space. The door at the very back of the hallway,the door to the outside,opens and Dana enters,wearing jeans and a T-shirt. Her eyes are hidden with sunglasses. Chad looks down the hall and spots Dana. His face brightens immediately. CHAD Dana! Chad heads down the hall toward Dana. DANA Hi Chad. CHAD How you doing? I heard you called in sick yesterday. DANA Yeah. I'm still not feeling that well, I just stopped by to pick up my check. CHAD What's wrong? DANA Oh, I've just got a cold or something. It's going away. CHAD That's good. (beat) Wait,what's with the sunglasses? DANA What do you mean? CHAD It's the middle of the night. DANA You don't want to know. CHAD What's really wrong? DANA Swear you won't tell anyone? CHAD You know I can keep a secret. DANA Ok,let's go outside. EXT. DOUBLE D'S-CHAD AND DANA COME OUT THE BACK DOOR. DANA Swear again that you won't tell anyone. CHAD I won't. DANA No,swear. Do the whole "I swear" thing. CHAD I swear I won't tell anyone. Dana takes off her sunglasses,revealing that she's got a black eye. CHAD Jesus,I knew it. Ted did it didn't he? DANA Yes. CHAD Dana,what are you doing with a guy like that? DANA I love him... Or I loved him. I don't know anymore. I can't take this. CHAD He does it too much,Dana. You've always got bruises somewhere. You need to get rid of him. DANA I can't just leave him. CHAD Why not? DANA He does shit like this to me for things like spilling coffee,or accidentally throwing away a magazine before he's done with it. Can you imagine what he'd do if I left him? CHAD Go to the police. DANA The police don't do anything. I've gone to them before. CHAD You can't just go on with him beating you. DANA Chad... (beat) What do you think about our relationship? CHAD I think Ted is a worthless sack of shit and you need... DANA (interrupts) Not my relationship with Ted. Me and you. Our relationship. CHAD We're friends... DANA But there's something deeper there isn't there? The shows I do for you. Talking all the time. CHAD Yeah, I guess so. DANA I care deeply for you,Chad. I may even love you. Do you love me? CHAD I, uh... DANA Do you love me? CHAD Yes. Yes,I love you. Dana kisses Chad on the lips and it lasts for a long time. They eventually pull apart. DANA I love you too. CHAD Then leave Ted. We can be together. DANA Don't think he'd reserve the violence just for me,Chad. He'd probably do even worse to you. CHAD Then what the fuck... DANA I say we kill him. CHAD Dana, I can't kill a person. DANA Why not? Wouldn't you like to kill him? CHAD There are laws. We can't. We'd end up in prison. I'm not a big fan of that idea. DANA Not if we're careful. Not if we do it right. Not if we don't get caught. CHAD Everybody gets caught. DANA Not everybody. CHAD It's too risky. DANA Ok,then everything stays the same. I stay with Ted and continue getting black eyes and bruises, and you continue staring at me through a glass partition and jacking off. Because if I'm still married then it goes no farther than that. CHAD Dana... DANA It's one extreme or another,Chad. Which will it be? There's a long pause,then- CHAD Well,how would we do it? EXT. DOUBLE D'S-THE NEXT DAY-WE LOOK AT THE CLUB IN A TIME LAPSE SHOT THAT TAKES US FROM DAY TO NIGHT. INT. DOUBLE D'S-THE SCENE IS THE SAME AS ANY OTHER NIGHT,EXCEPT THE STRIPPERS ARE NOW MIA,DANA,AND ANOTHER GIRL NAMED DIAMOND. Chad is standing by the D.J.'s booth. Down the hallway a guy is walking out of one of the booths. Chad is staring at Dana,so he doesn't notice. The D.J. notices though. D.J. Hey! Chad is still staring at Dana. D.J. Jizz mopper! D.J. goes to slap Chad on the back of the head but Chad turns and catches his hand mid-slap. CHAD I heard you. I've got it. Dana walks off stage,finished dancing. Chad heads down the hallway. INT. THE BOOTH-CHAD QUICKLY CLEANS THE WINDOW WITH WINDEX AND PAPER TOWELS,THEN SETS THEM ASIDE AND PUTS MONEY IN THE SLOT. The room beyond is illuminated,revealing Dana sitting in the chair. CHAD Hi. DANA You ready? CHAD Ready as I'll ever be. DANA It happens tonight. CHAD I know,I know. DANA Remember the directions? CHAD I've got them. Dana laughs. DANA We're actually gonna do it aren't we? Chad smiles. CHAD Yeah. We're gonna do it. DANA And then we can be together. CHAD Do I get a show tonight? DANA No. Save it. Once Ted is dead you can have the real thing. Dana walks up to the glass and puts her right hand on it. Chad goes to the glass and puts his hand against hers. SLAM CUT TO: EXT. DOUBLE D'S-NIGHT-DANA IS GETTING INTO TED'S CAMERO. As she does,she glances over toward the club. Parked right beside the club is Chad's station wagon. Sitting in the station wagon,watching,is Chad. EXT. A BRICK HOUSE IN TOWN-NIGHT-TED'S CAMERO IS PARKED OUT FRONT AND THERE ARE SOME LIGHTS ON INSIDE. Parked across the street is Chad's station wagon. INT. THE HOUSE-A BEDROOM-DANA PULLS TED INTO THE ROOM, LAUGHING. TED You're frisky tonight aren't you? DANA Get out of those clothes and find out just how frisky I am. TED Oh yeah... Ted starts pulling his clothes off. EXT. THE HOUSE-NIGHT-CHAD GETS OUT OF HIS STATION WAGON AND WALKS ACROSS THE STREET. INT. THE HOUSE-BEDROOM-DANA HAS TAKEN HER CLOTHES OFF AND IS LAYING BACK ON THE BED. Ted is pulling his pants off. EXT. THE HOUSE-CHAD OPENS THE FRONT DOOR. INT. THE HOUSE-BEDROOM-TED NOW HAS HIS CLOTHES OFF AND IS CLIMBING UP ONTO THE BED. He starts to climb over Dana put she puts her hand on his chest. DANA Wait. TED What? Dana points down. TED Oh. Ted goes down. INT. THE HOUSE-THE KITCHEN-CHAD PULLS A BUTCHER KNIFE OUT OF A DRAWER. He walks out of the kitchen and into a hallway,where he accidentally bumps into a small table with a basket of flowers on it. The basket falls to the floor,spilling dirt and flowers all over the hall. INT. THE BEDROOM-TED STOPS WHAT HE'S DOING AND LOOKS OVER TOWARD THE DOOR. TED What was that? DANA What? TED That noise... DANA Who cares? It was probably the cat. Just get back to work. Ted does. As soon as he does,the bedroom starts to slowly and silently swing open. Chad steps into the doorway,holding the butcher knife. Dana smiles. They lock eyes and Dana nods. Chad starts walking across the bedroom. DANA Yes. TED (muffled) Mm-hmm. DANA Yes! Yes! Chad reaches the end of the bed and walks around to one side. He stands beside it,looking down at Ted for a couple seconds. Then- DANA Yes! Do it! TED I'm doin' it! Chad taps Ted on the back with the butcher knife. Ted looks over at him. TED What the fu... Ted is cut off when Chad sticks the butcher knife into his throat. The blade sinks in about halfway before Ted jerks away from Chad,falling off the bed. Ted writhes around on the floor,making gargled sounds that are supposed to be screams,blood spraying from his throat,all over the wood floor. Dana crawls to the end of the bed to watch. Chad is leaning against the wall,breathing heavily, trying not to puke. Ted finally stops moving,dead. Dana is smiling,but her smile goes away. DANA What a mess. Dana looks at Chad,who looks sick. DANA Are you alright? CHAD I will be. DANA Calm down,buck up. We did it! He's dead! CHAD Yeah. Dana gets off the bed and walks over to Chad. DANA We can be together now. Dana unzips Chad's pants. DANA So let's be together. CHAD Now? Already? What about... Chad motions toward Ted. DANA We can take care of him after. Dana leads Chad over to the bed. EXT. THE HOUSE-LATER. INT. THE HOUSE-BEDROOM-CHAD,DRESSED AGAIN,IS WRAPPING TED'S BODY UP IN A PLASTIC SHOWER CURTAIN. Dana,in a silk nightgown,is sitting on the edge of bed, holding the cleaned butcher knife. CHAD I don't think dumping him in the Junction Reservoir is such a good idea. It's such a normal thing to do,Dana... People get dumped in reservoirs,ponds,lakes,whatever, all the time,and the killers almost always get caught. Now that Ted is completely wrapped in the curtain,Chad stands up. DANA Yeah,I thought of that. CHAD Then why is that the plan? DANA Well,Chad,there are certain aspects to the plan that I haven't told you about. CHAD Like what? DANA You're not gonna like it. CHAD I already don't like the fact that you haven't told me everything. I told you we had to be careful. Keeping me in the dark about shit is not a good start. DANA Honey,don't worry... Dana walks over to Chad and puts her left arm over his shoulder. DANA I'm gonna be fine. CHAD You're gonna be fine? DANA Yes. You,on the other hand... Dana slams the knife into Chad's stomach. Chad stumbles away and Dana pulls the knife back out of his stomach. He holds his bleeding stomach,looking down at it, in shock. CHAD Wh..what... DANA This is the part of the plan I didn't tell you about. Dana slashes the knife at Chad's throat but he slaps her arm away and the knife goes flying across the room. He then grabs her by the arm,swings her around and slams her against the wall. DANA Yes! CHAD Why? Chad slaps Dana. DANA Come on! CHAD Why?! He slaps her again and she falls to the floor. She catches herself with both hands and lays in a push up sort of position,looking down at the floor,blood running from her nose and mouth. She starts laughing,then looks up at Chad. DANA Beat the shit out of me tough guy! Chad,weakened from his wound,stumbles back against the wall before his legs give out and he falls to the floor beside Ted's body. DANA Holy shit, don't tell me that's it. Dana stands up,looking down at Chad. DANA A bloody nose? Cut lip? Maybe some bruises on my arm? What kind of pussy are you? I can beat myself better than that... Dana slams her face into the wall. Quick black and white flashback- Ted is in bed,looking through a magazine,when Dana enters in her nightgown and with her black eye. Ted looks up at her and lowers the magazine. TED What happened to your eye? DANA I had a little accident. Ted sets the magazine aside as Dana climbs into bed. TED You're such a klutz. They kiss,then Dana pulls away and motions to the eye. DANA So,what do you think? TED You can make anything look sexy. Dana laughs. End flashback,back to the present. Dana goes to a mirrored dresser and swings the back of her right arm into the mirror. It shatters and we see a bright flash,which causes us to- CUT TO: INT. THE HOUSE-THE LIVINGROOM-SOON-DANA IS SITTING ON THE COUCH IN HER NIGHTGOWN,FACE BLOODY AND BRUISED, HER ARM BEING BANDAGED BY A PARAMEDIC,CRYING. Sitting across from her in a chair is a detective. Police officers are all over the house. DANA I knew Chad liked me, maybe he was kind of obsessed, but I never thought he'd take it this far. I thought he was harmless. He killed Ted,then he... he raped me. He acted like I should be happy, he didn't understand why I was so upset. He talked about us going away together. He got so angry. He attacked me, but I managed to get the knife... DETECTIVE I understand that Ted's father recently passed away and left Ted with a large inheritance. Did Chad know about this? DANA Yes. Yes,he knew. DETECTIVE How did he know? DANA I told him. We were friends. I told him that Ted had gotten an inheritance and I wouldn't have to work at the club anymore because of it. That must've been what set him off. Dana starts sobbing. The detective stands up from his chair and sits beside Dana on the couch,patting her on the back consolingly. The paramedic,done bandaging her arm,stands up and walks away. As the paramedic walks out a police officer walks in. POLICE OFFICER Detective? DETECTIVE Yes? POLICE OFFICER We've got a live one in the bedroom. The detective stands up. DETECTIVE Who? Chad Weatherbie? POLICE OFFICER Yes. The detective looks at Dana. DETECTIVE I'll be right back. The detective then follows the police officer out of the room. Dana watches them walk out,no longer crying,a worried look on her face. We freeze on this look. After a couple seconds we pull back,until we're pulling back from a computer monitor and the picture turns back to The Teller's Tales website,The Teller on his webcam screen. THE TELLER Ain't love grand? As I told you,it was a story filled with Double Ds,including the always amusing Death and Deception. Dana should have known that anyone who could stand having a job like Chad's wouldn't be easy to kill. That does it for this Tale,but I've got many more lined up for you,so be sure to check by again soon. FADE TO BLACK. THE END