Volume I Issue 6 October 31, 1997
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Fear and Loathing in Malvern, PA
Malvern, Pennsylvania,
set the tone for the rest of the tour. We performed Of Mice and Men
at
a small all boy Catholic Prep school in Eastern Pennsylvania, outside of
Philly. We had some trouble locating this hidden school, and proceeded
to make several U-turns, until we located the elusive school. A trip isn't
a trip if we don't make at least one U-turn. This could be anything from
pulling into a street to getting off a major highway and getting on in
the opposite direction.
The students were very
friendly. A couple of them even tried to get me to hit on the new music
teacher. They said all the students hit on her because she was only twenty-three.
They told me she still lived at home with her parents. I told them at least
we would have something to talk about.
We also learned that
nothing gets a bigger laugh out of a bunch of adolescent boys, as the term
"Stroking it."
A Pain in Manassas
We then journey to the
Old Dominion. Where we had our most difficult load in to date. As we wound
our way up stairs and down long and short hall ways, we managed to only
damage every other wall and corner.
We performed both Of
Mice and Men and a full length Taming of the Shrew at Flint
Hill Academy in Manassas (sounds sort of like a rap group doesn't it).
This place was like a palace for rich liberals. The girls were wearing
pants and the teachers were wearing ear rings.
We met a lovely girl
named Courtney (pronounced Court-NAY). She interviewed us for the school
newspaper. And she seemed to have no trouble drawing our otherwise withdrawn
cast member, Jon, out of his shy little shell.
Also, in Manassas we
gained two official sponsors. The IHOP (known to many as the International
House of Pain). Our waitress Kristen, not only memorized our orders without
using pad and paper, but even remembered what we had the night before when
we came in the next day. She was originally from St. Mary's County. She
left there because she was running away from something.
The other sponsor will
be featured in an upcoming issue of the Review.
Kiss my Ashville
Then there was North Carolina.
We arrived in Ashville and were welcomed by big cookies and the water with
the lemons in it. We enjoyed our stay in a lovely Motel 6, and yes they
really do leave the light on. After we convinced the people at the Ashville
to let us do the full length version of Of Mice and Men. I have
never seen so many people who want ed to do extra work. And then after
the show more big cookies.
The next morning we dined
at the Waffle House (known to many of you as Sliders). Colleen said, "It
was my first time, and I can't say that about many things."
This is also the time
that I would like to complain about one of those inexplicable Southern
traditions, Sweet Tea. All I have to say is why. Are they too lazy to open
up a couple sweeteners and use a spoon? If they have Sweet Tea, why not
Sweet Coffee? And what are grits any way?
You Say Lima and I Say Lima
We are big in Lima, Ohio.
I mean huge. We performed for over 1600 students and teachers at the Lima
Civic Center. They roared, they cheered, and they snickered. It was cool
to perform where such greats as Shirley Jones and Seasame Street: Where
the Hell is Big Bird Tour, had gone before.
One exceedingly gross
moment in our tour, was our dear Chad's injury. Chad ripped a large chunk
out of his leg. This lovely would required several stitches. Colleen and
I were the first medics to respond. I kept a level head and began to treat
the wound. Colleen saw the ripped flesh, looked away, and said "I'll go
get Bill!" She's a real trooper.
Many people feel that
Ohio is just one great big expanse of grayness. Well they are right, but
the people of Lima will always have a place in my heart.
Silly Vania, Franciscans are for Kids!
Then it was up the road a piece to
Sylvania, Ohio. A suburb of Toledo, home of Max Klinger and strip clubs.
We performed at the Franciscan Life Center. Those nuns are so cute as they
wander around in their habits.
Our performances of Mice
were fairly well received. After Buzz dropped that "God damn, tart. . ."
line a lot of the unnecessary snickering disappeared. And they served these
donuts that tasted homemade.
The real highlight in
Sylvania though was the Clarion where we stayed at a surprisingly reasonable
rate. It was very nice and the bar was excellent.
Since we had a weekend
to kill we decided to go to Cedar Point Amusement Park. Any of you who
have been there know that it is a magic land, filled with the greatest
of all rides, the roller coaster. They have nine of these marvels of the
modern age. We got to ride five of them. They had hanging coasters, standup
coasters, wooden coasters, and big-ass drop coasters. The highlight for
many of us was the Magnum 2000. It climbed a staggering 204 feet to the
top and then shot you the same 204 feet down. If you were lucky, your stomach
joined you a minute or two later. This ride was so fast, after it was done
Chad had a bug solidly lodged in his forehead. Cedar Park is a must see
if you are ever near Sandusky, Ohio.
I Heard My Moma Cry the Night Chicago Died
I know many of you have
been to the Windy City, the Second City, the Toddling Town . . .
Not me! It was my very
first time in the town with enough clichés to support two hospital
based dramas. And overall the experience left me undamaged.
We didn't actually stay
in Chicago proper, instead we lived in Alsip. Alsip, a short Metra train
ride from downtown Chicago. Things I saw while riding on the Metra.
* Soldiers Field
* Urban Decay
* The Homeless
* Skyscrapers
* Those tenements from Good Times
Amazingly similar to
all the other cities in the United States, I have ever seen.
Later I got to see this
sprawl from above. Bill and I spent the $6.75 it costs to go to the top
of the Sears Tower. You know you can see four sports venues, four states,
and four red light districts from the lofty heights of the Sears Tower.
Personal moment of fulfillment came for me when I recreated the moment
in Ferris Beuller's Day Off, when they placed their heads against the glass
and looked down the building. They don't exactly encourage this, since
I had to step onto two rungs of the railing to do it. But it had to be
done.
We had the rare opportunity
to be in the audience of a nationally syndicated television show. I don't
want to give the name of the show away, but the initials were J and J.
The topic of the show was the ever relevant "I don't mean to be rude, but
chick looks like a DUDE."
The host handled this
topic with all the delicacy she is known for. And with the exception of
the lesbian kiss, which we were told would be edited out, the show went
smoothly. Something about the sponsors being afraid of lesbians kissing,
but they were fine with friends and family making money off of their loved
ones, who for one reason or another were more comfortable in men's clothes.
Welcome to America.
Speaking of America and
obvious consumption, the Miracle Mile. My goodness, what an obvious symbol
of consumption. Sachs, Viacom, Sony, Nike, and F.A.O. Schwartz, all along
Michigan Avenue. They had this elevator in Viacom store that turned into
a turbo lift and made all the sounds. Then you were dropped off in the
middle of a huge Star Trek department. I was in geek heaven.
Special Thanks
A big thank you to all the women in our lives who have given their time to assist us in our merry cause. Carol, Kathy, and Cali all have helped with our load-ins and the assistance was much appreciated. A personal thank you to Natalie for filling my life with joy in Chicago.
Upcoming Events
Well we are finishing
up our run in Towson, Maryland this week. Then we head off to Western Maryland
for a show in Lanconing. then Demerest, New Jersey, Brooklyn, and Sugar
Loaf, New York, and then Manassas again.
Just a reminder that
we will be having evening performances in College Park of Taming of
the Shrew on December 4, 5, & 6 at 8:00 p.m. And a matinee on Sunday,
December 7 at 2:30 p.m. If you can please come see us at the Tawes Theatre.
Its a big house and we need to fill it.
If you would like to
drop a note or post card to any of the Players, send it to:
Name of the Company Member
c/o Patty Kloss
Olney Theatre
2001 Olney-Sandy Spring Rd.
Olney, MD 20832
Until next time, don't
look under your bed.
Scott McCormick
If you have comments or suggestions, email me at [email protected]