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June 5, 2000 
THE NEW RODENT REVIEW
League Sign-Up

    I was at the center of the universe yesterday.  Or at least my own little corner of the center of the universe.  I guess that puts me at the slightly off center of the universe.  Yes, I like that better, much more in keeping with my new the world is not such an evil place attitude.  Getting away from the geography of the situation and getting to the meat of the matter, I think I saw nearly one or more persons from every aspect of my life for the last 10 years, yesterday morning.
    It all started on Monday morning.  I was meeting up with my friend Eric Schoen at his place in Dupont. We were heading over to the Source Theatre to sign up for the League of Washington Theatre auditions.  Now auditions maybe understating this event by calling it an audition.  Understating because it is in fact a Super-Mega-Audition.  You audition for every Theatre Casting Director, Talent Agent, and Porn Director in this little Berg.  And you have exactly 90 seconds to make, for good or bad, an impression. These auditors get to watch you and the other 700 plus people who think that acting is actually a way to make a living, pour their souls out.  Or at least as much of their soul as they can get out in a minute and a half. And these actors stand there and whine about things.  Things like "I never told myfather that I loved him" or "I was touched in an odd place when I went to the movies at age thirteen" or "I really want that can of tuna fish."
    I got to Source with Eric at 9:00 a.m.  An hour before the actual sign-up was to begin.  And there are already a million actors standing in line.  Well actually, more like a hundred, but that is way more actors than I am willing to deal with first thing Monday morning.  And so we have to walk past all of them.  There was Kosha Engler, who I had directed at Potomac's one act festival, and she says hello.  I think "Well that's good at least she is still talking to me, that's a good sign."  Then there is Grady Weatherford, who I was on Tour 49 with, sitting in a lawn chair supplied by Paul Mainard, who worked on The Replacements as an extra with me last year.  He was a video guy.   I had thought I might see one or two people that I knew, so every thing was fine.  Then the gates opened up and the actors from Scott's past just started appearing like some sort of demented curtain call.
    There was Patrick Bussink from Tour 50 and then Elizabeth Richard from Richard III.  Then blamo, Norm Seltzer the guy who directed me in The Foreigner and now in The Sorcerer's Apprentice. Then it was just boom, Tim King and John Benoit from Nutcracker.  And then bang, September Merkle from Richard III. And that girl Bethany from that play I did at Axis four years ago.  And Steve Sawicki the old company manager from Players.  Then I finally got to go inside to register for me and my friend Colleen Berry.
    There was Marianne and as I am leaving Daryl Lazapone walks out of the bathroom, both from the Nutcracker.  I am leaving now and think the whole thing is finally over and I see Michelle Morocco standing up against the wall, looking particularly fine, she was in the show I directed with Kosha.  And then Eric says to me I don't think there was a single person who didn't run up and kiss you and hug you.  I said only you bubby and I hugged him as I ran down the street.
    I suppose the whole point of this story is simple; where do all these fricken people come from?  In this life we seem to gather people to us like tails on a kite.  They trail off behind us and unless we see them every so often we tend to forget how important they were to us for a time.  And how fickle we are about who we actually try to hold onto.
 
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