December 16, 1999
even with one of the most powerful ears in the world at my beck and call i still find it difficult to stay connected to the things that matter.
pick up a phone. dial a number. listen to a tone. hear a greeting.
could it be any easier? yet i still put it off. why? the phone is there to my left yet i stall. why? the line can be connected and the message sent yet it isn't.
sometimes i boggle myself.
how can my mind, my personality, work like this.
it's not my home anymore yet i still think of it as such. my room is diffrent and my friends have moved.
i exist on a seperate form now, and my life works itself without my past. but is this completly so? is not my future shaped by my memories, my history, my collective. how do i stay in contact with these things when they move at diffrent speeds. how can i complete a mission when the general orders seem more complex then the original mission statement.
i must stay connected.
i must stay patched through.
i must stay in touch.
i must stay plugged in to what counts
even in the most complex of systems.