It was an exhaustingly hot spring morning on the sun. Oddly enough it was even hotter than that on Earth, who’s only source of heat is from that same sun which was just mentioned. Trees were spontaneously combusting, water was evaporating by the kiloliter, planes were plummeting from the sky (from bad piloting, not the heat, but it definately didn’t make things any better), Broccoli people were drying up, and one stupid, insignificant little person was sunbathing on the beach.

“What kind of an idiot sunbathes on the hottest day in the history of ever?,” asked Greeno.

“This one,” replied Gus. “Why do you ask?”

“Aren’t you burning up?”

“Well, my pants are on fire, but other than that, I’m fine.”

“Liar.” Greeno got out from under his air-conditioned car and poured some water onto Gus’s pants in order to put out the fire, then quickly ran back to the car. Before he made it, however, his leg dried up and started to crack from the heat.

“THANKS.”

“Why did you say that so loud?”

“I accidentally hit caps lock.”

“What?”

“On my computer, I hit caps lock.”

“Do you even know what a computer is?”

“Of course I do, its like a paper weight, for big pieces of paper.”

“Uh huh.”

“Well, aren’t you going to go do that thing I told you to do?”

“What thing?”

“The one about the dolphins and ice cream.”

“You mean when you told me that dolphins probably like ice cream?”

“Yeah, that one.”

“That wasn’t a plan. It was just a thought.”

“I’ll show you a thought.”

“Sure.... Well let’s do it I guess. I mean, it would be good to see the water one last time before it’s all gone.”

“Yeah. Well, lets get going.”

“Okay.”

The two of them drive to the supermarket, where they find not only no ice cream, but also no liquid or frozen goods whatsoever. They continue back to their house where they seem to be hording all things cold, including pounds of ice cream. It seems as though Germany and Fred prepared for the heat pretty well. They all leave towards the ocean, with lots of ice cream, ready to see if Gus’s assumption was correct.

After driving for 300 miles, they start to realize that: (a) Gus doesn’t know how to drive well at all, (b) Gus doesn’t seem to know where the ocean is, and (c) Fred ate all of the ice cream. Despite the fact that they were out of ice cream and almost out of gas, they decided to continue on to go swimming while there was still water.

Gus was forced out of the driver’s seat and Germany took over driving. They were at the ocean in less than a minute according to Gus’s (broken) watch. Upon reaching the ocean, they realized that there was a serious deficiency of dolphins living there, as well as an equally serious deficiency of water. They - except for Gus - could understand the lack of dolphins, since, on second thought, they didn’t live in the ocean in the first place, and it seemed like they were too late to see water anywhere.

They walked through the ex-ocean into a vast dirthole. It seemed to stretch on for ever, or at least to Europe. They kept going farther and farther out with no respect for those lying down, trying to swim in dirt. Well, they didn’t really deserve respect anyway. Following a long trek, they reached the continental shelf. Looking down, it seemed like it went down for ever. Being the genious that he is, Gus decided to jump down. It was a really, really far jump. The fall seemed to have lasted for a whole minute, but it wasn’t that long according to his watch.

As he looked down towards his almost certain demise, Gus noticed a faint sense of luck around him. Suddenly, he saw a giant trampoline directly below him. As his fall came to an end, he hit the trampoline and bounced back up. Upon seeing this, Greeno and the rest decided it would be smartest to jump down after Gus. After doing so, they too saw big trampolines and bounced a lot. A while later, after they all stopped bouncing, they decided to go walk around and see all of the interesting ocean views.

There were some great views from down on the ocean floor. They saw a large coral reef, an area totally filled with dead sea creatures - presumably from the lack of water - as well as just the incredible sight of the sky from so far down. From such a great extra distance, the heat of the sun didn’t feel nearly as harsh. The incredible pressure well made up for that though. Around the time that the sun started to go down, it occured to Greeno that it was seemingly impossible to escape from the bottom of the ocean, especially since Gus was scared of climbing. Shortly later, it occured to Gus that they could stay down there for a long time with all of the dead fish there to consume. With an even shorter time after that, it occured to Fred not only that the dead fish would decay and stuff, but also that the water would more than likely come back down in a day or two.

Tired of hearing everyone’s occurences, Germany decided to make a plan for escape. He decided to take out the self-inflating boat he conveniently had in his pocket. His plan was to hit Gus on the head with it, and then figure out a better plan. After it was executed until the “better plan part”, Greeno noticed how that would be a good way to get out. They could all just float up to the top of the ocean once it rained again. As Germany quickly pointed out, the raft could only hold three people. However, Greeno and Fred said that since they were Brocolli people, they didn’t really count as people, so they could fit the whole gang on the raft. Unfortunately, as those two well knew, it did apply. After a quick vote, it was decided that Gus was the one to stay behind, and that Fred smelled as bad as Chris.

The next day, it started to downpour. Fred, Germany, and Greeno all boarded the boat. Gus didn’t seem sad at all. In a surprisingly short period of time, the ocean floor was covered with water, and the boat started to go up. As Gus’s head got covered up, he began to swim up slowly. However, after swimming a hundred or so vertical feet, Gus began to fatigue. He started to drop down into the water, and it looked like Greeno was starting to shed a tear. Just then, Gus popped back up and grabbed on to the boat. He was just tricking his friends. What a joker, that Gus. He rode along the side of the boat for the rest of the way up.

Now they were on top of the freshly filled ocean, with no knowledge of where to go. Fred reccomended they row one way, and Germany reccomended another way. As a compromise, they rowed both ways, alternating every minute. For the first minute, they went east - the random direction chosen by Fred.

It was quite a miracle that they all went by Gus’s watch to decide when rowing would change, seeing as Germany pointed west. Had they used a properly functioning watch, they may never have been seen again. On second though, maybe it would have been best for the world if these idiots were never seen again, but alas, they returned safely to land a few weeks later.