S-U
Space Mountain: De La Terre De La Lune - 'a rollercoaster depicting the journey from the Earth to the Moon; as imagined by Jules Verne', says the instruction manual of doom; but the conclusion was reached that the attraction was simply a modern form of human torture, in which Emma got stuck in a safety restraint and delayed the launch of the ride while cast members struggled to entangle her from the ride's evil grip.
The Space Mountain experience was like being propelled into a pitch black blender at 60 miles an hour; broken only by a moon which leers evilly at you halfway through the torture, laughing at you before you embark upon another 45 seconds of hell. Officially the wildest Disney rollercoaster in the world; Space Mountain was only enjoyed by massacist Sazzle.
Swimming pool - Edd said that there were six pools in the Disneyland resort but never mentioned that all were officially banned to residents of the lowest class Hotel Santa Fe. In the abscence of a communal swimming pool for all hotel residents (that's because a whole water park is planned to be opened soon), George and Sazzle simply sneaked into Sequoia Lodge's pool while the attendants weren't looking.
The man who looked after the swan boats on Lake Disney - After flirting outrageously with every member in the party (except Edd, who even before getting on the swans of doom was feeling ill), everyone - save Edd - fell neck over heels for this guy and lapped up every corny compliment he made. ''Oooh he thinks we're 18!!" chorus Emma, George and Saz in unison, never for a minute realising that they've just been blatantly chatted up.
Trendsetting - Whatever we did within the park - whether sitting around the Plaza Gardens fountain or climbing on the MGM Studios viewing platform - we immediately set trends and all others flocked around us.
Tinkerbell - Tinkerbell flew through the air infront of Sleeping Beauty's Castle just before the start of the Firework display; and it was A REAL WOMAN, I tells ya. Whom was probably killed in the ensuing firework spectacular.
Toon Circus - C'mon sing our happy happy song, our happy happy circus song. Or something like that. Either way: Toon Circus - the Parade Which Follows You. Performing approximately 10 times a day on Main Street USA and following us into any other land in the park. To celebrate the fact that Toon Circus could be experienced up to 54 times per day, free hilarious hats which Emma wore around the souvinier shop, and free red noses, were given away. Edd accidentally chatted up a French cast member giving away souvinier noses, but that's another story.
Tour Guide Barbie - Having scary knowledge of the Disneyland park, Edd knew his exact way round and the location of everything. This made him like a more feminie version of tour guide Barbie.
Thunder Mesa RiverBoat Cruise - The dullest ride in the history of the world: a paddle steamer ride around the Frontierland lake for fifteen minutes whilst being played hillybilly country music. Brightened only by the appearance of a Peter of the Future on the riverbank, a slackjawed yocel in a rocking chair smoking on a pipe.
Uber-Generosity - In an incredible display of gratitude, Emma bought up the entire contents of the Santa Fe shop as a thank you to Edd for organising the trip. She therefore spent half her entire holiday money on these incredibly generous presents; and the other half of her money on the con artist outside the Disneyland Park.
Unsalted butter - As breakfast was all you can eat, featuring the beloved Pain au Chocolat, and food prices in Disney were expensive, many of the party became masters of subterfuge, smuggling food out of the breakfast halls to eat later in the day. Amoung the various baguettes, croissants and slices of ham and cheese, pots and pots of jam and unsalted butter were smuggled. Whilst eating a buttered roll later in the day, it was George who came up with the quote of the holiday - 'What's the difference between salted and unsalted butter?'.
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