When she was 12 years old, and I was a senior in high school, she started becoming almost bloated, and began losing control of her bladder. I took her to the vet and he did many tests; all of the results were bad news. I was in denial that she would have to be put to sleep because I could never make that decision about my best friend who had been with me through all of my growing up. I kept wanting to put out more money to somehow cure her but my parents knew that ending her pain was the best answer.

I couldn't go with her that day because I knew it would be too hard. I kissed and hugged her goodbye and told her I would always love her. When she left with my dad and brother as she was stepping off the porch she looked back at me. It's been almost 10 years since that day, but I still remember it vividly. That look she gave me said so much. It told me she understood where she was going and that it would all be ok now. I really felt like she knew it was her last goodbye to me and she couldn't help looking back almost to make sure I would be ok. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do and I still miss you Sootie with all my heart. I hope that wherever you are, you are running and jumping and playing your heart out and that I will see you again.