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so my parents went to houston to see the dr. about when she's gonna go under the knife. I forget what life feels like without drama of some sort moving, depression, self destruction, drugs, the hospital, asshole guys,that whole mess with nicole, matt, my grandma dying last summer mom having surgery again.In alot of ways I would never want to change it. but sometimes,It's like so much has happened to me that time has to catch up to even it all out tomorrow I'm gonna go with chris to emos then maybe friday with john gotta call him.my hair is fading to pinkish but it's damn groovy. Between me and spaceboy I think Its gonna be okay I know I'm not ready to hear about his relationships so we just leave that outside of our relationship and It should be alright. Today was unproductive slept till work worked came home hung out with erin. they changed our cable and now we have some new stations but the rest are all screwed up I watched opposite of sex good movie. this is one huge tangle of thought that is just exploding all at once and I'm just trying to get it all down. I wish I was tired but I just kinda here. I've been trying to be really direct with peopleso far it's been working. I hope I get my permit I need to drive I'm in everyone's way including my own at least now I'm doing something about it instead of depending on a boyfriend. god I'm so interesting *Leah |