April 21, 2005
Four
After many, many hours spent at collegeboard.com, I have decided upon my top four schools. The list is always subject to change, but at present, I feel best about the following:

1. Villanova University. Villanova, Pennsylvania.
2. Cornell University. Ithaca, New York.
3. University of Pennsylvania. Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.
4. University of Virginia. Charlottesville, Virginia.

And hey Ma and Pa--I don't like your tones. "And what is your criteria for these choices?" Well sir and madam, my main criteria was that you would not get off my ass about coming up with actual school names to consider. I wasn't even going to tell you them until I had researched a bit more but, well, you know how it is--tell the psychologist one thing and the whole family knows, neh? Cripes all friday, give me a break, lest I scrap these schools and not apply.

April 15, 2005
Greater Tuna
Tomorrow is opening night for Greater Tuna and I do not have a voice. Sweet mother of mystery.

April 14, 2005
Fish.Feel.Pain.
It's hard to drive when you're crying.

April 9, 2005
The Start of Better Days

April 3, 2005
I Love Pope
Probably my favorite Grandma Griffin story is the one that goes: two Born-Again Christians came to the front door and asked her, "Would you like to be saved? Would you like a second chance?"

And she said, "No, I got it right the first time," and shut the door in their faces.

April 2, 2005
The Narration that Just Occurred in my Head #5
Pretending is a waste of tiempo, tiempo durante que debes estar escribiendo tu novela.

April 1, 2005
A List of Movies Steph and I Attempted to Make

• The Lions and the Elves (c. 1999): starring Steph and Molly as the liberators; Jonathan and Steven as the oppressors. Filmed by Elizabeth in Steph's backyard, the Liberators arrived in capes, wielding light sabers, and attacked the oppressors of the Lions and the Elves (influenced by Narnia and Middle Earth, I assume). After the villains were slain, we crossed sabers and shouted, "The Lions and the Elves are free!" and then pranced off the screen. Unfortunately, in the final taping, just before we said the one line in the movie, a dead Steven sat up and said, "Do that Elf thing!" (Also, I hadn't washed my hair in days for this, so it was extremely black. I remember being very uncomfortable.)
• The Beanie Baby Movie (c. 2000): starring a whole slew of Beanie Babies (most especially the Teal Teddy, Mooch, Goochy, Tiny, Valentino...) as voiced by Steph and Molly; intended to be filmed by Elizabeth. The stage was the space beneath a chair. A black backdrop was hung and we poked our hands through (with black gloves), maneuvering the Beanies to act as we wanted them to. It was a suspense drama, answering the big Ty question: who is the most valuable Beanie Baby? Though rehearsed thoroughly, it was never filmed. Steph still has the script.
• A Knight Action Movie (c. 1998): starring Steph and Molly as the knights. We were (if my memory serves me correctly) brother knights, sons of the King, and we were feeling nervous about something; perhaps our father the King was expecting us to be good swordfighters and we were not. The cinematography plan was superb, as good as it gets without a storyboard. It would start off filming the pretty butterflies in Steph's garden, pass through the Black Gate, and the peaceful scene would be interrupted by a panning over to two strapping young lads fencing in the courtyard (driveway). The entire fight was choreographed (I jumped over Steph's sword at some point). Then we would clink swords, say "Good fight," and then talk about our father. Never filmed. Shame.
• Animorphs: The Invasion (c. 1997): starring Steph as Jake and Cassie; Molly as Rachel, Tobias, and Marco. Though it had no plan for a filming, we did act out the first Animorph book in Steph's front yard. We spoke to the sky when talking to Elfangor; we made sounds of mutation and discomfort when morphing. A fine performance.
• Orphan Boys (c. ?): Surely Steph pushed for a movie on orphans.
• The Island of the Chams (c. 1998): starring Steph as the Sailor Dude, Elaine as the Fair Maiden, Molly as the Wizard, and numerous other fourth graders as other characters. Steph wrote this script and pitched the idea to us; we supported it a billion percent. Rehearsing on the playground (usually on the grassy area between the swings and where it would officially become The Soccer Field, next to a fence), we memorized lines and planned costumes and created a mental storyboard. The only scenes I remember were the beginning sequence on a ship, and then a moment when Steph was talking to some other character, and the camera would pan over to me, ducking behind a plant, listening to every word. My incantation, though now forgotten, did contain the word "Lazaroo" and we laughed because that's Roo's name. Never filmed.

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