| The Sunday Scoop Edition #1 I've got the urge ... to vomit. Ok, well the first ad that I'll be reviewing is for Sunsilk shampoo and conditioner. Yes, alas, a girlie product--well, actually it's aimed more at the house-wife audience; a genre that seems to consist of either fat women wearing citrus colours (who dance around the house wearing a smile like the Cheshire Cat, while flowers fall from the ceiling), or slim, tall, blonde career mums who battle the house work like they do the corporate world. One word: Puh-leeze (and yes, I know that's not an actual word, but you know what I mean). However, in this ad, the mother seems to be a mixture of both: the stay-at-home type, yet she is slim and dances. Ok, the only times I've ever seen my mum dance were at her wedding (because it was tradition), and when she'd had a few too many (because that's what alcohol does to you). Growing up, I always thought I was missing out on something seeing as my mum never danced for joy when she had just washed her hair, nor did she parade around the house with a big grin on her face when she did the housework. In fact, she used to be very agitated while cleaning. I blame the advertising world for making me think there was something wrong, because my mum never had the time of her life when she was cleaning. Nor did some strange man--usually Ian Turpie--appear in our kitchen offering her a miracle product, which would make our kitchen sparkle and ping with cleanliness. Although, I thought I saw him once in the cupboard, but that was just my moron brother trying to scare me. I was highly disappointed. But back on topic: what is it that makes people dance around after they've washed their hair? I wash my hair regularly and I don't feel like a long lost member of Young Talent Time. However, the mother in this ad (let's call her Tina, in honour of Young Talent Time star, Tina Arena) clearly has a secret that she's not letting me in on. Not only does Tina shake her bootie in celebration of her clean hair, but she also gets her brush and plays it like a guitar. Wow, that's happiness for you. Nothing screams 'I've got clean hair' more than a middle-aged woman playing her hairbrush like a guitar. But the part that really had me saying "what the ... ?!" was when her teenage son entered the room and turned the stereo down with an exasperated roll of his eyes, to which Tina danced over to him and started banging her hip against his crotch. Like I said: "what the ... ?!" Well, for once I'm glad that my mum never had shampoo so wonderful that it caused her to temporarily lose her sanity and perform incestuous acts on my brother, because I surely would have been sick and very afraid for my safety. Who knows what it is that makes people dance for joy at their clean hair? Perhaps they've never had clean hair before. Perhaps the director slipped something into their drink before filming. Perhaps they're not actors, but escaped mental patients. Or perhaps they're just being paid a lot of money to make asses of themselves. But I seriously suspect that the shampoo is toxic and has affected their brains. Whatever the reason, I'm steering clear of Sunsilk shampoo and conditioner--it's dangerous stuff. You have been warned. Sarah Taylor, Professional smart-ass. |