Sasausage Deities
(in chronological order of indoctrination)

The Great Sasausage All-powerful omnipresent creator with no embodiment

Cledus God of the Cambucha Mushroom People. (see commandment #3) Lives in Desbaaz's Pocket.

Fluffy Three-legged, one-horned, toothless goat god of all things sexual and kinky. Lives in Desbaaz's closet.

Gasseus Goat god of flatulence and Ramen noodles.

Kiwimonga God of small, green, seeded fruits. Zues's bitch.

Erm Transvestite god of confusion.

The Menacing
Guy in the
Bath Robe God of creepy, dark places, bath robes, and toiletries

Snipus God of drunkenness, darts, card games, and cheasy peas

Traceus God of stolen finger puppets, porn, detatchable penii, and pork rinds. He who is hung like a hamster.

Desbaaz God of all souls sold over ebay. Owner of George and Fluffy. Murderer of Cledus and Desmortea. Founder of cults. Axemurderer of hookers. Member of the USN/A. A very sexy Italian poledancer.

Benus God of Mashed Potatoes, Rolls, and Breadsticks. Wandering Prophet of Nonsensical Aclarity and Honeybuns. Owner of Chairicus. Fornicator of Geoecological Townships' Rectii. Discoverer of Truth and Lost Gods. Weilder of the Omnipresent Penis. Choco bandit of section 16. A Real Man. Man of International Mystery and Many Titles.

Lavar Burton Reader of rainbows. God of just plaine being cool

Gonzo God of large noses and blue pubic hair

Auggie Galgothan healer d�mon

Earliscious God of swinging testicles, golden lights, sprinkles (including rainbow ones), and sprinkle guns

Pornicus Pimpeus God of universal muggings, general street information, and women, men, shrooms, goats, and other such novelties on camera

George (unstoppable d�mon) God of all things cute and fuzzy. Comander of the rabid wombats. Lives on Desbaaz's dash board.

Muffin Evile, demonic cat toy of destruction. Was stolen from Desbaaz. =(

Desmortea Goddess of all cute little deformed radiation mouseys. Was sacrificed to George in early 2001.

Keithius The mildly disgruntled african american individual. Lord of the bitchasses. God of time traveling super-sperm and unjustified negativity. (Recieves no toiletries)

Chairicus God of comfy asses.

Carringtonus First of the Triumvate. Lord of Talking Penii and Manly Songs.

Lynchius Second of the Triumvate. Lord of All Things Seriously F*cked Up.

Dailicus Third of the Triumvate. Lord of Jamacian/Rock/Fugging Awesomely Cool Comedy Music.

Hamtaro
Lord of the dance. God of "Dance Dance Remix Revolution�"
(not associated with Hamster Dance)

Gorilla Hobo Lord and Master of all things Hoboputer and Pesoli. Owner of Sled Fred, and Progenator of Benus. Wielder of Cool Tattoos

Brucifer The Lord of Darkness, Grills, and Mad-Silent Ninja Skillz. He-Who-Does-Not-Laugh. Wielder of the Golden Spatula of DOOM.

The Muffin Mayun God of desserts and politeness. Watcher of line 5.

The Great Efseewun God of stompin' around, Lucky Charms (which are the devil), and all words beginning and/or ending with Y. Trainer of corps.

Knappicus God of Pianos, Ben Folds Five, Dolphin Fornication, and Your Mom. Rescuer of Chairicus. Slayer of Gerbils. Consort of Diana.

Brittani Goddess of Sartre (But don't mistake that for self-objectification!), Surrealism, and Sex Collages.

Diana Goddess of Stolen Goddess Names, Normalcy, and Eigerflocken. A french whore.

Cassius Goddess of Rousseau, Revolution, Barricades, and other such novelties of history. Creator of Quesarittos.

Iceman Alcoholic elder god of coyotes, senility, and hookers. Owner of the coolest truck ever.

Jojo Lord of the pissy wiccans, God of youth, adolescence, virginity, and absence of driving capabilities. Devourer of twinkie-resembling hamsters and nuggets.

Ronnie the Pigeon Boy God of Etnies, lung cancer, ravenous, home invading pigeons, trumpets, bitches, psycho bitches, punk bitches, but definately NOT bitchasses.

Gilleus Lord of the one-eyed gods. Discoverer of ancient digital manuscripts of violence. God of pencil shavings, anti-retention, and sarcasm.

Hahnicus God of inquisition, torture, awkwardly timed erections, roadkill, explosively defication offspring, and stick figure legs.... huh???

J-icus R-icus God of racially motivated stereotypes. Archrival of Keithius. Shooter of proverbial "hoops". Lord of the politicians.

Staceus Goddess of all hot DDR chicks, car bingo, scooby, cool whip, and innocence.

Colinus God of Rock training and certification, old movie references, and the funk.

Q-SO God of questionable sexual orientation, Tanqueray, musicals, lack of stubble, and all things metro.

Dorian God of destruction, cat trees, jingly collars, and decietful cuteness.

Goppius Noodleus Goddess of not-so-dirty hippies, gormet ramen noodles, angsty eighteen year olds, headless skeletons, servitude, paperclips, toys, and zelda. Cleaner of apartments for a certain slackass high priest.

The Great Sasausage	All-powerful omnipresent creator with no embodiment
Cledus	God of the Cambucha Mushroom People. (see commandment #3) Lives in Desbaaz's Pocket.
Fluffy	Three-legged, one-horned, toothless goat god of all things sexual and kinky. Lives in Desbaaz's closet.
Gasseus	Goat god of flatulence and Ramen noodles.
Kiwimonga	God of small, green, seeded fruits. Zues's bitch.
Erm	Transvestite god of confusion.
The Menacing Guy in the Bath Robe	God of creepy, dark places, bath robes, and toiletries
Snipus	God of drunkenness, darts, card games, and cheasy peas
Traceus	God of stolen finger puppets, porn, detatchable penii, and pork rinds. He who is hung like a hamster.
Desbaaz	God of all souls sold over ebay. Owner of George and Fluffy. Murderer of Cledus and Desmortea. Founder of cults. Axemurderer of hookers. Member of the USN/A. A very sexy Italian poledancer.
Benus	God of Mashed Potatoes, Rolls, and Breadsticks. Wandering Prophet of Nonsensical Aclarity and Honeybuns. Owner of Chairicus. Fornicator of Geoecological Townships' Rectii. Discoverer of Truth and Lost Gods. Weilder of the Omnipresent Penis. Choco bandit of section 16. A Real Man. Man of International Mystery and Many Titles.
Lavar Burton	Reader of rainbows. God of just plaine being cool
Gonzo	God of large noses and blue pubic hair
Auggie	Galgothan healer d�mon
Earliscious	God of swinging testicles, golden lights, sprinkles (including rainbow ones), and sprinkle guns
Pornicus Pimpeus	God of universal muggings, general street information, and women, men, shrooms, goats, and other such novelties on camera
George	(unstoppable d�mon) God of all things cute and fuzzy. Comander of the rabid wombats. Lives on Desbaaz's dash board.
Muffin	Evile, demonic cat toy of destruction. Was stolen from Desbaaz. =(
Desmortea	Goddess of all cute little deformed radiation mouseys. Was sacrificed to George in early 2001.
Keithius	The mildly disgruntled african american individual. Lord of the bitchasses. God of time traveling super-sperm and unjustified negativity. (Recieves no toiletries)
Chairicus	God of comfy asses.
Carringtonus	First of the Triumvate. Lord of Talking Penii and Manly Songs.
Lynchius	Second of the Triumvate. Lord of All Things Seriously F*cked Up.
Dailicus	Third of the Triumvate. Lord of Jamacian/Rock/Fugging Awesomely Cool Comedy Music.
Hamtaro	Lord of the dance. God of "Dance Dance Remix Revolution�" (not associated with Hamster Dance)
Gorilla Hobo	Lord and Master of all things Hoboputer and Pesoli. Owner of Sled Fred, and Progenator of Benus. Wielder of Cool Tattoos
Brucifer	The Lord of Darkness, Grills, and Mad-Silent Ninja Skillz. He-Who-Does-Not-Laugh. Wielder of the Golden Spatula of DOOM.
The Muffin Mayun	God of desserts and politeness. Watcher of line 5.
The Great Efseewun	God of stompin' around, Lucky Charms (which are the devil), and all words beginning and/or ending with Y. Trainer of corps.
Knappicus	God of Pianos, Ben Folds Five, Dolphin Fornication, and Your Mom. Rescuer of Chairicus. Slayer of Gerbils. Consort of Diana.
Brittani	Goddess of Sartre (But don't mistake that for self-objectification!), Surrealism, and Sex Collages.
Diana	Goddess of Stolen Goddess Names, Normalcy, and Eigerflocken. A french whore.
Cassius	Goddess of Rousseau, Revolution, Barricades, and other such novelties of history. Creator of Quesarittos.
Iceman	Alcoholic elder god of coyotes, senility, and hookers. Owner of the coolest truck ever.
Jojo	Lord of the pissy wiccans, God of youth, adolescence, virginity, and absence of driving capabilities. Devourer of twinkie-resembling hamsters and nuggets.
Ronnie the Pigeon Boy	God of Etnies, lung cancer, ravenous, home invading pigeons, trumpets, bitches, psycho bitches, punk bitches, but definately NOT bitchasses.
Gilleus	Lord of the one-eyed gods. Discoverer of ancient digital manuscripts of violence. God of pencil shavings, anti-retention, and sarcasm.
Hahnicus	God of inquisition, torture, awkwardly timed erections, roadkill, explosively defication offspring, and stick figure legs.... huh???
J-icus R-icus	God of racially motivated stereotypes. Archrival of Keithius. Shooter of proverbial "hoops". Lord of the politicians.
Staceus	Goddess of all hot DDR chicks, car bingo, scooby, cool whip, and innocence.
Colinus	God of Rock training and certification, old movie references, and the funk.
Q-SO	God of questionable sexual orientation, Tanqueray, musicals, lack of stubble, and all things metro.
Dorian	God of destruction, cat trees, jingly collars, and decietful cuteness.
Goppius Noodleus	Goddess of not-so-dirty hippies, gormet ramen noodles, angsty eighteen year olds, headless skeletons, servitude, paperclips, toys, and zelda. Cleaner of apartments for a certain slackass high priest.