JOKE 62

Cat Haiku

To all you cat lovers...

You never feed me.

Perhaps I'll sleep on your face.

And that will show you.

You must scratch me there!

Yes, above my tail! Behold,

Elevator butt.

I need a new toy.

Tail of a black dog keeps good time.

Pounce! Good dog! Good dog!

The rule for today.

Touch my tail, I shred your hand.

New rule tomorrow.

In deep sleep hear sound

Cat vomit hairball somewhere.

Will find in morning.

Grace personified

I leap into the window

I meant to do that.

Blur of motion, then-

Silence, me, a paper bag

What is so funny?

The mighty hunter

Returns with gifts of plump birds

Your foot just squashed one.

You're always typing

Well, let's see you ignore me

Sitting on your hands.

My small cardboard box

You cannot see me if I

Can just hide my head.

Terrible battle

I fought for hours. Come and see!

What's a term paper?

Kitty likes plastic

Confuses for litter box

Don't leave tarp around.

Small brave carnivores

Kill pine cones and mosquitos

Fear vacuum cleaner

Want to trim my claws?

Don't even think about it!

My yelps wake the dead.

I want to be close

to you. Can I fit my head

inside your armpit?

Wanna go outside.

Oh, no! Help! I got outside!

Let me back inside!

Oh no! My Big One

has been trapped by newspaper.

Cat to the rescue.

Humans are so strange.

Mine lies still in bed, then screams!

My claws aren't that sharp...

Cats meow out of angst

"Thumbs! If only we had thumbs!

We could break so much."

Litter box not here

You moved it on me again

I'll crap in the sink

The Big Ones snore now

Every room is dark and cold

Time for "Cup Hockey"

We're almost equals

I purr to show I love you

Want to smell my butt?

 

 

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