| According to the Alaska Department of Fish and Game, while both male and female reindeer grow antlers in the summer each year, male reindeer drop their antlers at the beginning of winter, usually late November to mid-December. Female reindeer retain their antlers until after they give birth in the spring. Therefore, according to every historical rendition depicting Santa's reindeer, from Rudolph to Blitzen, had to be a girl. We should've known. Only women would be able to drag a fat man in a red velvet suit all around the world in one night and not get lost. |
| Bag This Idea I am giving this bag as your Christmas gift Now do not get angry and do not be miffed Along with this gift are the top ten ways To use this bag through the holidays! Number one is simple and easy you see Put a gift in the bag and send it to me! Number two use some markers and stickers to dress it up nice Give it to a neighbor filled with sweet smelling spice Number three with adult supervision required Put in sand and a candle and light when desired Number four is to tie it with twine on your tree Then you'll have an ornament to remind you of me Idea number five will help you stay slim For diets on Christmas are very grim Fill the bag with your favorite holiday snack Close up the top and give it a smack Then eat all you want and keep your attitude cool Broken treats have no calories and that is the rule! Number six (for tree huggers only) Recycle this bag with your paper stacks And save a tree from getting the ax Number seven take the bag outside where its cold Fill it with snow, use the bag as a mold Into the freezer the sack will go Save till July when you're longing for snow! Number eight fill the sack with canned goods for the needy When you get to heaven you won't look so greedy! Number nine this bag is good for storing those leftover bows The reason you keep them, nobody knows! Number ten is to fill the bag with tinsel and confetti At the New Years Eve Party you will be ready! I gave you my ideas to fill you with cheer Merry Christmas to you and a Happy New Year! -Caralee Beers |
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| Office Holiday Memo |
| To: All Employees From: Management Subject: Office conduct during the Christmas season Effective immediately, employees should keep in mind the following guidelines in compliance with FROLIC (the Federal Revelry Office and Leisure Industry Council) 1. Running aluminum foil through the paper shredder to make tinsel is discouraged. 2. Playing "Jingle Bells" on the push-button phone is forbidden (it runs up an incredibly long distance bill) 3. Work requests are not to be filed under "Bah humbug" 4. Company cars are not to be used to go over the river and through the woods to Grandma's house. 5. All fruitcake is to be eaten BEFORE July 25. 6. Egg nog will NOT be dispensed in vending machines. In spite of all this, the staff is encouraged to have a Happy Holiday. |