Sept 18, 1999
Why French Kissing Is Bad :
1. Who really wants their teeth read like brail?
2. My spit smells bad as it is - I don't need yours making it a national disaster.
3. Messy is okay, sloppy isn't a matter of semantics.
4. Imagine just one thing : slugs mating.
5. Where has that tongue been, young man?
6. When has the French ever been kind to me? I think it's just a trick.
7. While song lyrics like " tongue tied and tied to the tongue " sound cool, the actual practice is painful and imbarassing.
8. I usualy have so much saliva I spend more than half my time swallowing - why would I need some of yours to complicate matters?
9. I can think of so many more things to do with my tongue. . . licking a cats ass is up there . . .
10. . . . . Oh, on second thought, I know exactly where that tongue's been . . .