Setting: Four months after ‘Goodbyes. Disregards any and all spoilers for

season five.

Disclaimer: I don’t own them. You know it. I know it. So sue me if you want

to, oh mighty PTB. You may take my money, but you’ll never take my freedom.

ONE WEEK 1/11

by Desi

* Prologue *

*********************

I know that I’ll get over this for sure

I’m not the type who dreams there could be more...

(You Were There -- Southern Sons)

*********************

"Hawaii??"

"Yeah - in a little under a month I’ll be in Hawaii for a whole week."

"You’re kidding!"

"Nope."

"God. I am in the wrong line of work."

"Hey, JAG officers get sent to exotic locations all the time."

"Yeah, when someone dies, or when something blows up, or crashes..."

"Hmm. Okay, you do have a point there."

"Of course I do. But anyway, let me get this straight. You have a whole week

of shoreleave. In Hawaii."

"Jealous?"

"You have *no* idea."

"Actually, the ship is docked for eight days in total, but I will have a few

duty shifts."

"Oh, poor you."

"Yeah, well, it’s a tough job..."

"Oh please. Excuse me while I go throw up."

"You really are green with envy aren’t you?"

"Do you blame me? While you’re stretched out on the sand, in the sun, exotic

women draped all over you... I’ll be stuck here behind my desk in DC!"

"Sounds like you’re the one who could do with a break, Mac."

"What? Oh, no I’m okay... Just a little wishful thinking, you know?"

"Why don’t you... ah... why don’t you... come to Hawaii?"

"What?? I can’t just -"

"Mac, when was the last time you took a vacation?"

"Well..."

"If you have to think about it, it’s been far too long. I bet you have

tonnes of leave just piling up, don’t you?"

"I just don’t see why -"

"Why *not*? Come on, Mac. And you know, it’s been four months since I left.

It would be good to see you again."

"I don’t know -"

"Just say ‘yes’ Mac."

"Stop trying to bully me, Harm!"

"Do you see what’s wrong with this picture? The very fact that you need to

be *bullied* into a week of sun, surf, and sand in Hawaii."

"..."

"Was that a sigh of resignation?"

"Well... I guess the Admiral would give me a week off..."

"Of course he will. This is going to be great, Mac. I can introduce you to

some of my friends out here... we can do some serious sunbaking... you might

even end up draped with a few exotic Hawaiians yourself."

"Yeah, I guess."

"Don’t sound so enthusiastic."

"Sorry. I’m still getting used to the idea. But you’re right - it’ll be

great."

"Good... Oh, hey Mac, there’s someone here waiting for the phone..."

"No problem."

"I’ll give you a call in a few days."

"Sure. And Harm... thanks. I think this may be just what I need."

"Hey, what are friends for?"

"Yeah... Well... Talk to you later, then."

"Bye, Mac."

* Day One *

*********************

How could you give your love to someone else,

And share your dreams with me?

Sometimes of all the things you’re looking for,

It’s the one thing you can’t see...

(Save the Best For Last -- Vanessa Williams)

*********************

It wasn't a big, dramatic reunion like in the movies. She didn’t squeal,

drop her bags, and run into his outstretched arms. He didn’t lift her off

her feet and swing her round. And they definitely didn’t kiss passionately

while passers-by saw them and smiled indulgently.

Instead, they met in the lobby of the hotel she was staying at, with wide

grins and a brief hug that conveyed much emotion, but hid even more.

The afternoon of their first day together was spent, typically, at the

beach. Giving ample opportunity for them both to relax, work on their tans,

get caught up with each other’s lives, and most importantly, to

surreptitiously check each other out in their respective bathing suits.

That evening, however, saw them joined by three of Harm’s fellow pilots. To

have dinner, ostensibly, but Mac was under the distinct impression they’d

come to check her out.

"Oh yeah, Pappy talks about you all the time Major," Lt. Erin ‘Potluck’

Hartnell said with a wide grin before taking a swig of her beer.

"Really?" Mac drawled, hiding a grin as she saw Harm’s embarrassed

expression.

"Well, I wouldn’t say *all* the time," he began defensively.

"Honestly, he never shuts up," Harm’s RIO, Lt Silverburg, broke in, ignoring

the other pilot’s protests.

Enjoying Harm’s shipmates’ obvious attempts to embarrass him, Mac responded,

"So what kind of things has he been telling you all about me?"

"Well Ma’am, only good things that I’ve heard," said the third man at the

table - callsign Bouncer - in a smooth southern drawl, "Though I don’t blame

him. If I had a girlfriend as pretty as you are, Major, I’d talk about her

all the time too."

Rolling her eyes at the compliment, it took her a second to realise there

was something inherently wrong with Bouncer’s statement. Turning to Harm,

she raised her eyebrows at him. "Girlfriend?"

He sighed, grinning sheepishly. "I’ve told them we’re just friends - they

don’t believe me," he finished with a shrug.

"Oh, you’re not going to give us that old line too, are you Major?"

"It’s not a line," she replied, "We really are just friends."

The three looked at the former partners seated next to each other - an

obvious couple no matter what they might say. Their expressions betrayed

their scepticism more than adequately.

Mac looked over at Harm helplessly, but he simply shook his head. "Don’t

even bother," he advised, somewhat wearily.

"Right... Well, anyway," Hartnell spoke up, graciously changing the subject,

"What do you guys say we move on to somewhere a little more lively?"

The meal had been over for a while, and the group had been lingering over

their drinks as they talked.

"I’m definitely up for a little action," Bouncer immediately announced his

assent. He drained the last of his beer, then looked towards Harm and Mac.

"What about you two?"

They shared a glance, then Harm replied, "Oh I think we might just hang

around here for a while longer."

"Well, I guess I better go with you two, if only to keep an eye on you

both," Silverburg said. "They’ll only end up in a fight, or some kinda

trouble otherwise," he explained to Mac.

She in turn sent Harm a pointed look. "Oh, I know the type." At which Harm

did his best to look offended.

"Well I guess we’ll be leaving you two alone then," Hartnell said as she

rose from the table, a knowing look on her face. The others joined her and

they quickly said their goodbyes and turned to go.

"You didn’t want to go with them?" Mac asked once they’d left.

"Nah," he replied easily, then pursed his lips in thought a moment before

continuing. "Why would I want to go with them when I can stay and... dance

with you?

"Dance?" She couldn’t suppress the pleased smile that immediately crossed

her lips.

"Yeah. Come on," he said, standing and holding out his hand to lead her over

to the tiny dance floor in the corner.

And then they were dancing.

They were dancing. Slowly. To a slow song played on an antique harlequin

jukebox.

It felt good to be in each other’s arms. Natural. Comfortable. Innocent.

Intimate, extremely *nice* - but still innocent.

Innocent, that is, until something quite small, seemingly insignificant,

happened.

He shifted his hand slightly on her back. A slow glide upwards from just

above her waist to rest between her shoulder blades. Her bare shoulder

blades. The touch was exquisite. Electric. And suddenly both became very

much aware of the other body pressed against their own.

The awareness came suddenly, but when it did, everything was immediately

different.

It could have happened then. It almost did. Her eyes were level with his

chin, but it only took the slightest movement and their gazes met. Her hand

tightened around his. His touch against her spine became a caress. What was

once natural, comfortable and innocent was now most definitely otherwise.

They stared at each other, and for a long moment it seemed like something

was about to happen. Inevitably so. But before either could succumb to what

was so obviously a preordained event... The song ended. And with it the

spell they were under.

They pulled away from each other and returned to the table to finish their

drinks. Acting like nothing happened because neither was sure that anything

actually had.

* Day Two -- afternoon *

*********************

just you and me

on this island of hope

a breath between us could be miles

(I Love You -- Sarah McLachlan)

*********************

Harm was on duty that morning, and so Mac took the opportunity to sleep

extremely late, and then laze away a few hours stretched out by the hotel

pool. They met up again in the afternoon however, and decided to explore the

beachfront for a while.

They strolled along the boardwalk, enjoying the relaxed atmosphere and

browsing the market stalls. Mac was debating whether or not to have beads

woven through her hair, when she noticed Harm had wandered off a little way

to watch as a tattooist worked on a customer.

She sidled up him. "Thinking of getting one?"

"Are you kidding? No way," he answered emphatically.

"And why not? What’s wrong with tattoos?"

"Nothing," he told her, smiling at her accusatory tone. "But last time I

checked they fell under the jurisdiction of personal choice - and it’s my

personal choice not to have one."

"Is it the pain thing? Cause you know it does hurt like hell, but that’s

nothing a big strong sailor like yourself shouldn’t be able to handle."

"No, it’s not the pain thing," he scoffed, then took her elbow to guide her

away from the tattooist, just as he steered the conversation away from

himself. "You know Mac, I still don’t know anything about yours. Except of

course, that I’ve seen you in that little bikini of yours and still have yet

to see it, which really only leaves two places for it to be..." he trailed

off, his eyes challenging her.

"There’s three places it could be, actually," she responded boldly.

"Where - ?"

"Use your imagination."

His eyes widened in alarm. "You mean..."

"Oh, I’m kidding. Here, you want to see it so badly?"

He took a hasty step back and held up his hands in refusal. "No, it’s okay,

forget it."

She rolled her eyes. "Harm! Come here and stop panicking - I’m not going to

flash you." Calmly she reached up and undid the top button of her sleeveless

blouse, then pulled it and the bikini top underneath to one side - just

enough to reveal a tiny colourful butterfly on the inner slope of her right

breast.

His curiosity quickly overcame his initial reluctance, and he leant in to

get a closer look. It was with a sudden jolt, however, that Harm realised

just what, exactly, he was staring at, his face mere inches from her chest.

He straightened immediately and backed off. And if he hadn’t been so busy

trying to act nonchalant, he might have noticed the way Mac’s breathing had

increased ever so slightly along with his, and the way her teeth

surreptitiously bit into her lower lip.

The previous night’s almost-encounter on the dance floor had most certainly

*not* been discussed. The incident had been filed away - along with a

hundred other moments - under ‘D’ for ‘Denial’. At least, that was the

official story. In reality, they were both thinking about what happened.

Both wondering what would have happened if they’d taken that step. Why

they’d allowed themselves to be distracted by the end of the song. And what

on earth was holding them back.

"It’s uh... It’s nice," Harm said finally. "Pretty," he added. "But I would

have thought you’d have gone for something a little more..."

"What?" she demanded as she straightened her shirt.

He shrugged. "I don’t know... skull and crossbones, something like that."

She crossed her arms over her chest. "Something more macho, you mean."

"No - this isn’t a masculine/feminine thing, Mac - I just thought you might

have gotten it done with a bunch of Marine friends, and picked out

something... tougher."

She narrowed her eyes. "Okay, I’ll buy that. Nice save, by the way. You

know, I still think you should get one." Now she smiled. "And I know what

would be perfect."

"Do tell."

"You could get *Property of the US NAVY* tattooed across your six!" she

finished with a laugh.

He rolled his eyes at that. "Oh, funny."

"Yeah, I thought so," she said, grinning.

He shook his head and chuckled in spite of himself. And for a moment he

simply looked at her. The oh-so-pleased with herself smile, laughing eyes,

the aura of self confidence - the refusal to be ashamed of who she was. He

looked away before she noticed his scrutiny, and took in their surroundings

instead.

The afternoon was fading by then, the shadows lengthening as the sun fell in

the sky. "Hey, you feel like finding somewhere to sit down and have a

drink?"

"Sounds good - all this walking is thirsty work."

"And afterwards, we should head down onto the beach. We can... ah... watch

the sunset."

"Sure, why not?" she agreed again.

They were walking side by side, and they faced forwards as they spoke, but

out of the corner of his eye, harm was sure he saw her smile.

* Day Two -- dusk *

*********************

Some say love, it is a hunger - an endless aching need

I say love, it is a flower, and you it's only seed

(The Rose -- Bette Midler)

*********************

It was dusk, and the sun was just falling below the horizon - casting a rosy

hue across the sky and setting the waves on fire. Harm watched Mac

surreptitiously as they wandered along the shoreline.

"It’s so beautiful here," she sighed.

He studied her features as if he’d never seen her before. He’d been doing a

lot of thinking lately. Circumstances had changed. *He* had changed too. And

Mac... somehow he seemed to be only just discovering who she really was.

Even though, of course, he’d known all along.

He was brought out of his contemplation suddenly as she glanced over and

caught him watching at her. But she simply smiled softly, and turned her

gaze back towards the water.

"Will you marry me?" he asked quietly.

Her head whipped around to stare at him, and it took her a full five seconds

to speak. "What?!" she finally whispered in disbelief.

He calmly repeated the question.

She moved round from beside him to face him, about to ask something like

‘are you for real?’ or ‘are you kidding?’ but then she looked in his eyes

and *knew* that he meant it. And so she asked the only question that really

mattered. "Do you love me?"

He reached out and lifted her fingers to his lips, pressing a soft kiss

there. Both their hands were trembling. "Yes," he answered simply, and

honestly.

"I love you too." There were tears in her voice. And a great sense of

release, at finally being able to voice her feelings.

"Then you will?"

"Wait, no - hold on." His face fell in the short time she took to continue.

"I’m not going to get engaged to someone I’ve never even kissed."

"Oh..." his reply came with a great sigh of relief. "Hey, we’ve kissed

before."

"That time doesn’t count."

"No you’re right, it doesn’t. So how about this?"

He kissed her then with a sweet, slow intensity, and when they separated

again all she said was, "Ask me again."

"Sarah, will you marry me?"

A gentle smile crossed her face as she replied.

* Day Two -- evening *

*********************

Kiss me,

Beneath the milky twilight

(Kiss Me -- Sixpence None The Richer)

*********************

"Is this real?" she asked a while later, as they sat higher up the sand,

gazing up at the gradually appearing stars and the waning moon.

"I hope so," he replied, running the fingers of one hand along her bare

upper arm, causing her to shiver slightly.

She leaned her head against his, and drew his arms more tightly around her

middle, drawing warmth from his body to ward off the cool breeze blowing in

off the water.

"You have to buy me a ring," she announced suddenly, sitting forward

slightly and turning her head to look at him.

"Of course I will," he answered calmly, pulling her back to her former

position, resting against his chest.

"Good. Because no one will believe me unless I have it as proof."

"Why wouldn’t they believe you? And by ‘they’ I assume you mean everyone

back at JAG?"

"Yeah, well you know it was strange - I told Harriet first, after the

Admiral, that I was dropping everything to come and spend a week with you

here in Hawaii, and at first she was a little surprised, but after that once

everyone had found out, there was nothing - no comments, no speculations,

not even any funny looks. I didn’t have to convince a single person that you

and I were still ‘just friends’. The way *your* friends reacted - that’s

more like what I expected."

He considered that for a moment. "Mac, don’t you think - and okay this is

just a theory - but isn’t it likely that Harriet told everyone in advance

not to act suspicious because she didn’t want you to freak out and change

your mind about coming?"

"Actually that does sound a lot more likely - I mean, even *Carolyn* didn’t

bug me about it... And that does seem like something Harriet would do."

"Okay then, so you don’t need the ring as proof?"

"No, but I want one anyway. And when are we going to get married?"

"How does tomorrow sound?"

"Tomorrow??" she frowned, "Okay this time you *must* be kidding."

"Yes, tomorrow, or the day after if you want. But Mac, I don’t want a

lengthy engagement. And if we don’t get married sometime over the next few

days, then that’s exactly what it will be."

"Well, okay I don’t want that either. And I guess this doesn’t really

classify as ‘rushing into things’ since we have known each other for three

and a half years."

"We certainly took our sweet time didn’t we?" he said, his voice rife with

amusement.

‘God, yes," she laughed in response.

"So how about tomorrow then?" he brought them back to the subject.

"Well, for starters, we need someone to perform the ceremony. And we need to

find rings..."

"We can do all that tomorrow morning. I’m sure the base pastor would do it,

or else we can track down a justice of the peace here in town."

"Sounds like a plan," she said, and turning in his arms again, she placed

her hands on his face and drew his mouth to hers.

After quite a while she drew away from him and jumped to her feet, holding

out her hands to pull him up beside her. "Come on," she urged.

"Where are we going?" he asked, confused at the sudden change of focus.

She stepped closer and put her arms around his neck. "There’s one more thing

we have to do before I can marry you," she told him seriously.

"And what’s that?"

"I have to see how good you are in bed."

"Excuse me?" he spluttered, his eyes wide with incredulity.

"Well, if I won’t get engaged to someone I’ve never kissed, I’m certainly

not going to marry someone I’ve never slept with," she reasoned.

"Way to give a guy performance anxiety," he muttered.

"Don’t worry - I’ll go easy on you," she said before pulling away, grabbing

his hand, and all but dragging him off the beach.

* Day Two - night time interlude *

*********************

I don’t care if the sun don’t shine

I get my loving in the evening time

When I’m with my baby :)

(I Don’t Care If the Sun Don’t Shine -- Pattie Page)

*********************

Anticipation is an extremely potent emotion. It took forever to reach the

hotel. And it took forever for the lift to arrive. And the ascent to her

floor took forever again as they held each other’s gaze across the crowded

interior. And it was a slow, seductive dance as she located her key and

unlocked the door.

She didn’t bother with the lights as she entered the room, taking a few

steps in and then simply waiting. She heard him close the door behind him,

and then they were alone. The atmosphere was static, and the temperature was

rising steadily - heat radiated from *everything*. Her body. His body. It

pulsed from the air around them and between them, from the carpet beneath

her feet, from the furniture - from the *bed* against one wall. The heat

pervaded her senses and encompassed her thoughts.

And then she felt it. His hands resting lightly on her shoulders.

She turned to face him, meeting his eyes through the darkness. She raised

her hands, letting them drift up his arms as she took a step towards him.

She realised they were both feeling it - the indecision and uncertainty

along with the delicious tension and exquisite warmth flowing between them.

"Mac, we don’t have to do this..."

"I know." Of course she knew. But she appreciated the sentiment of his words

even as she dismissed them. "But I want to. Don’t you?"

His reply came with a firm grasp on her upper arms as he pulled her up

against him and his mouth lowered to hers.

And then the *heat* took over, and the moment of hesitation, along with

everything else, was forgotten in its wake.

It was frantic, those first few moments. Mouths devouring, tongues tangling.

His chest was rapidly bared as buttons were dealt with and material was

thrust from his shoulders. Breathing was a secondary objective, their lips

never parting. His hands were beneath her shirt, exploring soft flesh. Hers

danced across the harder planes of his torso, smoothing over sculptured

muscle, down to work on the fastening of his pants.

And then his hands emerged to run down her arms and still her endeavour,

bringing her hands up to rest against his chest as his kisses slowed.

She broke away somewhat impatiently. "What?"

His fingers caressed hers. "It’s too fast. I don’t want to rush this - I

want it to last."

Torn between desperate need and the desire to prolong the sweet torture, she

took a deep breath before nodding her agreement. Her arms slid up to

encircle his shoulders then, and she pressed close against him, burying her

face against his neck. His hands in turn stroked over her back, pulling her

closer as he inhaled the sea-salty scent of her hair.

One breath, two breaths, against the warm skin of his throat, and then she

turned her head to bite down gently on his shoulder, her teeth grazing over

the firm muscle. Her tongue ran along the line of his collarbone, up to the

juncture of his jaw, over the tip of his chin to lap playfully over his

lower lip.

His hands clutched at her back in response to the teasing, one moving to

hold her head as his mouth captured hers. Then they were kissing again,

slower now - though no less passionately. And by unspoken agreement, they

moved as one across the room towards the bed.

He lowered himself to the mattress, and she kicked off her sandals before

coming to stand between his knees. His hands moved to the buttons of her

blouse, as did hers, and together they removed it, letting it fall to the

floor behind her. Her hands stilled against his shoulders then as his arms

encircled her to reach for the string tie of her bikini top, which soon

joined her shirt on the carpet.

His hands dropped to her waist and smoothed over her hips as he brought her

closer, burying his face against her stomach for a moment. She ran her

fingers through his short dark hair, savouring the intimacy.

And then... and *then* he raised his head, and ran his tongue lightly over

the tip of one breast, agonisingly slow. Her knees weakened at the sudden

sensation, and her hands moved to clutch at his broad shoulders. She looked

down and watched as his mouth tortured her left nipple, then the right,

pausing briefly to press a kiss to the newly discovered tattoo. Her mouth

fell open, her breathing quickened, barely even registering as his hands

made short work of her skirt.

All she could reach of him, though, was his back and shoulders, and she

wanted more. She pulled away, and lowered herself to her knees before him,

her lips meeting his momentarily on the way down. She moved on quickly

though, skimming her fingers over his chest, following closely with her

mouth and tongue.

"God, Mac," he groaned as she nipped at his navel, warm pleasure flooding

through her at the sound.

She held his gaze, letting him read the intent written there as she pulled

his shoes off and tossed them away, quickly and efficiently divested him of

the rest of his clothing. She leaned in close once more, inhaling his musky,

wonderfully masculine scent before finally dropping her eyes from his to

look at him - all of him - and smiled with a decidedly *feminine* pleasure.

She teased the length of him with tongue and teeth, before enveloping him in

her mouth, enjoying both the taste of him, and the power she could exert

over him in this position - if that’s what this joining was all about. It

wasn’t though, and so when he reached for her arms to pull her up, she went

willingly, grinning at his murmured "You’re gonna kill me if you keep that

up" as he manoeuvred them both to lie back across the bed.

He kissed her again, a slow, hot, open mouthed kiss, as his hands ran over

her body. Stripping away the last material barrier between them without

ceremony, his mouth left hers to mark a path of destruction across her skin.

She gasped, her hands clutching at his shoulders, the bedspread, anything

within reach, as he latched onto one painfully tight nipple, treating the

other to the same attentive nipping and suckling before moving on.

The feel of his hands on her thighs, urging them apart, sent a sudden jolt

through her as his tongue drew wet, lazy patterns across her belly. He

settled between her knees and it seemed that every muscle in her body was

tensed in anticipation of relief. Relief from the pooling, throbbing ache

that had been painfully present since that first magical kiss on the beach

at sunset.

First there was a cooling rush of air as he breathed against her, and then

his mouth was on her and all she knew was the feel of his lips and tongue.

She cried out at the first contact, her hips lifting instinctively to meet

the assault. His tongue moved languorously over her heated flesh, grazing

his teeth over her clit before pulling it between his lips and gently

sucking. "Oh God, Harm," she breathed his name over and over as the tension

built deep within her. She was close now, so close, but she couldn’t see

him, or touch him and she wanted him, needed him with her.

She said his name again, louder, grasping for his shoulders to pull him up

and away from his enthusiastic ministrations. He raised up and over her,

understanding her reasons - the same he’d had before when urging her away

from him. This time - their first time - was for the both of them together.

And so he moved to cover her body with his own, their lips joining once more

as she raised her legs to encircle his hips. His mouth moved from hers and

they simply stared into each other’s eyes as entered her, a thousand words

of pure emotion passing silently between them. They remained still for a

moment, adjusting to the new sensations, and then he began to move slowly

within her. She could feel him stretching her, and filling her, the

exquisite friction as he withdrew and then filled her again causing a rush

of incoherent noise to leave her throat. Hoarse, panting breath becoming

gasps, then moans and cries as the pressure mounted. She planted one foot on

the mattress to press up against him, his own movements becoming faster and

more frantic as together they approached their mutual goal.

It came in a torrent of pleasure and shattered cries as he thrust deep

inside her one last time, their bodies irrefutably joined as they tumbled

over the brink as one.

They returned gradually to themselves minutes later, though it felt more

like hours had passed as their racing heartbeats evened out and they no

longer had to remind themselves to breathe. Their mouths met in a series of

slow, luxurious kisses as they rolled onto their sides, her head pillowed on

his arm, neither wanting to lose contact with each other for a second.

His fingers brushed strands of hair from her forehead as their mouths parted

so they could look at one another directly. And they smiled. Lazy, contented

joy present in the curve of their lips.

"So," he spoke eventually in little more than a whisper, "Did I pass?"

"What?" was all she could manage just then, still drifting in a pleasant,

hazy afterglow.

"Still gonna make an honest man out of me?" he clarified.

And then she remembered, quickly replacing the wide grin that appeared with

a pensive look. "Oh I don’t know... I think I could use some more

convincing..."

"More?"

She nodded. "*Lots* more. You up for it sailor?"

In a flash she was beneath him, her arms pinned above her head. It was all

the reply she needed.

* Day Three - morning *

*********************

Sunshine on my window

Makes me happy

Like I should be

(Calypso -- Spiderbait)

*********************

"Where did you disappear to?"

The sound of her voice startled him as he entered the room, and he whipped

around to see her sitting up at the table in her bath robe.

"I woke up and you were gone," she accused, munching into a slice of

pineapple.

"Well, Mac I didn’t want to wake you. I waited for a while - I ordered

breakfast, which you seem to be enjoying right now... I took a shower... I

watched you sleep..."

"You watched me sleep?"

"Yeah. You’re very cute when you sleep, you know."

She hid the pleased smile that threatened to appear in her coffee cup. One

night with him and she was turning into the biggest sap in the world. That

was just great.

"So where did you go?"

"Well you were showing no signs of waking up anytime soon," he answered,

holding up a white paper bag, "So I went down to the store in the lobby and

bought myself a toothbrush."

He was standing by the table at this point, and tossed the bag onto it

before leaning down, placing both hands on her face and kissing her in one

fluid motion. She smiled after he pulled away, and smiled again as he licked

his lips and said, "Mmm... Good pineapple huh?"

She nodded, reaching for more fruit and wondering if she was *ever* going to

stop smiling like an idiot.

"You know," he began, moving to sit in the other chair at the small round

table, "It’s getting pretty late..."

"I know," she replied, "Oh-nine-twenty-four local."

He let out a laugh, shaking his head - he should have expected that. "Mac,

you know, married couples tell each other *everything*. Including the secret

of their internal clocks."

"*Sweetheart*" she exclaimed sweetly, her voice dripping sarcasm, "You

wouldn’t want me to reveal all my secrets at once, would you? Where’s the

fun in that?"

He sighed, resigned to the fact that she was simply never going to tell him.

"Well anyway *dear* I was just thinking that we do have a lot to do today."

"I know that too," she said, draining the last of her coffee and then rising

from her chair. She picked up the bag containing his toothbrush and handed

it to him, then moved over towards her suitcase. "I’m going to have a

shower. Why don’t you brush your teeth, then head on back to that ship of

yours. You need to check in, don’t you?"

He stared at the bag in his hands. "Yeah..."

"And while you’re over there at the base, you can talk to the chaplain? I’m

going to go looking for something to wear. If nothing else is exactly

traditional about this, I’m at least going to wear white. How bout we meet

back here at, say noon? And we can go looking for rings."

"Sure..."

She turned back towards him. "What’s wrong?"

He frowned a little, then shrugged. "Nothing, really. It’s just... You’re

very calm."

"I’m *calm*?"

"Well, yeah. You’re acting like this isn’t a big deal at all."

"Oh. Well I guess I am calm. But that doesn’t mean I don’t think this is a

big deal... This is the *biggest*. It’s just..." she trailed off as they

looked across the room at each other. "Well what about you? Are you *not*

feeling calm? Are you having second thoughts?"

He stood at that crossed over to her. "No! Not at all. But I mean, you said

it Mac. This is the *biggest* deal. I’ll admit to feeling a small degree of

nerv... anticipation. I was just wondering how you can be so calm about it

all."

She smiled up at him briefly before biting her lip and looking away. "This

might sound stupid... But yesterday on the beach was so perfect... And last

night was so wonderful... I mean it all just feels so right." She shrugged

slightly, and looked up at him sheepishly to find him gazing at her in

wonder. "What?"

His thumb stroked her cheek. "I love you."

There was that damn smile again.

* Day Three - dusk *

*********************

At last

My love has come along

My lonely days are over

And life is like a song

(At Last -- ??)

*********************

The sun was setting once again over the water. The new lovers stood barefoot

in the sand, their hands linked as they listened to the good-natured

chaplain read from his prayer book. Good-natured because he’d let himself be

whisked off the naval base and down here to the beach when they suspected he

would really have rather performed the ceremony in his nice cosy chapel.

Harm snuck a look at the woman beside him, barely hearing a word the man

before them was saying. She was so beautiful, wearing a long sleeveless

cheesecloth dress, the light material fluttering around her ankles in the

breeze. A red hibiscus flower behind one ear was her only adornment, that

and the smile on her face as said "I do."

Mac glanced up at the man beside her, his fingers gripping hers tightly. She

could scarcely believe that this was the same arrogant, over-confident

flyboy she’d met three and a half years ago. Because *that* flyboy she never

would have married in a thousand years - let alone just three and a half.

*Will you marry me?*

One short phrase. A handful of small words that had changed their entire

world.

And so, just twenty-four hours after those four little words were uttered,

they exchanged vows and rings. And finally, a kiss.

* Day Four *

*********************

We talk about it all night long

We define our moral ground

But when I crawl into your arms

Everything - it comes tumbling down

(The Ship Song -- Nick Cave and the Badseeds)

*********************

She snored, he discovered. Only when she lay on her back, and even then not

really very loud at all, but still most definitely snoring. Something she

denied with vigour when he told her.

"I do *not* snore!"

"You do - I heard you just before."

"I don’t, Harm."

"Well, if you don’t then you were doing a pretty fair imitation of it. Mac,

you know if the wind changes your face might stick like that. Mac? Mac put

down that pillow..."

He was ticklish. She’d always suspected he might be - not that she’d given

it all that much thought. But he was, very much so. Especially his ribs. An

extremely valuable piece of information she’d discovered by accident during

a pillow fight earlier that morning.

Now, though, she was lying sprawled on her back across the bed, idly

listening as he sang softly to himself whilst shaving. It was funny how you

could know someone so well, and yet still have so much to learn about them.

She’d already found out a few things about Harm - the ticklish thing, for

instance. But also other stuff. Like the fact that he couldn’t stand it when

the toothpaste tube was squeezed in the middle.

"Mac, I’m sorry, I just have to say this..." He’d picked up the tube where

she’d left it beside the sink and held it up in front of her eyes. "The tube

should be squeezed from the bottom up. The *bottom* see?"

He’d even demonstrated for her. And all the while she’d been choking back

laughter around the toothbrush in her mouth. The serious expression on his

face was almost too much. Who cared about how a tube of toothpaste was

squeezed? Well, he did obviously. And so after she’d spat and wiped her lips

she simply patted his arm soothingly. "Okay, I’ll try and remember that."

She’d been feeling extra indulgent just then, as they’d just emerged from

the shower... Another newly discovered trait. The man could work wonders

with warm running water and a bar of soap. He gave an mean foot massage,

too. Yes, all in all she’d been in a fairly accommodating mood all day.

Just then he emerged from the bathroom, freshly shaved and wearing only a

towel. He came and stretched out beside her on the bed, his head propped up

on one hand as he looked down at her.

"Harm?"

"Yes?"

"I’m hungry."

He let out a laugh. "When are you not?"

"Hey, it’s the middle of the day - we skipped breakfast. Are you saying

you’re *not* hungry?"

"Well, I guess I could eat something..."

She rolled her eyes, putting one hand on his chest and giving him a push.

"Why don’t you make yourself useful and call room service?"

"Yes Ma’am," he grinned before getting up and moving over to the sideboard,

"What do you want?"

"How ‘bout a chicken salad? Oh, and an orange juice."

"Okay..." he said as he perused the room service menu lying by the phone.

"You’re scanning for anything with the word ‘tofu’ or ‘lentil’ in it, aren’t

you?"

His silence was answer enough.

Later, after they’d eaten and decided that perhaps, in a little while, it

was possible that they just might leave the hotel room... maybe... Mac was

once again reclining across the bed, though this time she had her husband’s

chest to use as a pillow. She stared at the ring on her third finger for a

time, her left hand held up in front of her eyes. Stared at the intricate

woven gold band that was a smaller match for his as he played with her hair,

running his fingers through the soft strands.

"You realise, of course," her voice shattered the quiet calm, "That sooner

or later we’re going to have to take a reality check."

His hand paused at her words, then returned to its gentle ministrations, and

she felt the rise and fall of his chest behind her as he sighed.

"I knew it was too good to last."

She turned her head against his shoulder to look at his face. "What was?"

"The present - too good to last," he clarified. "You want to talk about the

future, don’t you?" he asked gently.

"Well... yes, I think we should. We only have two days left together then

we’re both out of here - in different directions."

"Okay," his voice was resigned, "Why don’t you start?"

She took a deep breath, gathering courage before sitting up and turning to

face him. "I’ve been thinking about this since you proposed, and I’ve

decided... I’ll give you four years, Harm."

He simply looked at her. "Four years for what, exactly?"

"Well... remember that promise you made me - oh, about a year ago? After

Harriet had little AJ? That gives you four more years till you have to make

good on your deal. The thing is, I won’t do it alone. If we’re going to have

a family, it won’t be with you away ten months out of the year. So. Can you

handle that, Harm? Four years, and you can fly all over the world. But then

I want you back where I can have you with me every day."

Oh please say yes, please *please* say yes, she pleaded silently. She hadn’t

wanted to give him an ultimatum. But it was what she had to do. No matter

how *right* they were together - how much they loved each other - if he

didn’t give her this one thing it simply wouldn’t work. Not in the long

run.

"Four years," he repeated, his face unreadable, "You know, I want a family

too, Mac... And I wouldn’t ask you to do it alone - I wouldn’t want you to.

I’d want to be there for everything. So... yeah. Four years I can live

with."

She sat for a moment in stunned silence - scarcely daring to believe what

she’d just heard him say. And then she moved, throwing her arms around him,

almost suffocating him in her enthusiasm.

"Thank you," she whispered against his neck, "I love you so much."

With that she pulled away just enough to reach his mouth, and she kissed him

- intending to demonstrate the truth behind her words.

* Day Five *

*********************

Oceans of angels

Oceans of stars

Down by the sea

Is where you drown your scars

(Malibu -- Hole)

*********************

"Harm, why did you propose?"

They were stretched out side by side on colourful beach towels, letting the

sun dry them after a lengthy swim in the surf.

"Ah... Because I love you and wanted to marry you?"

"Well, I would hope so... But there had to have been some reason why you

proposed the way you did. It did sort of come out of the blue."

He sighed. "I guess it was kind of a spur of the moment thing..."

Mac rolled over at that, propping her head on one hand and raising an

eyebrow at him over her sunglasses. "Not something a woman wants to hear

from her husband of two days, flyboy."

"Well no it was more than that," he quickly amended, "You know when we were

dancing that first night? I really wanted to kiss you..."

"Yeah I kinda got that," she smiled, remembering.

"But I didn’t - kiss you, I mean - and you didn’t either. And it just seems

like we were both having a hard time getting past the whole ‘just friends’

thing, even if we wanted to. I think we were too used to the way our

relationship was. The way I saw it, if something didn’t happen to shake us

up a little, then we’d have just kept on the way we were indefinitely."

"So you’re proposal was more of an ice breaker than anything?" she asked

dryly.

"Sounds kind of dumb huh? But you know that’s still not all of it. When we

were walking along the beach, watching the sunset, I was thinking about a

lot of stuff. Everything had been changing so quickly for me, but you were

the one constant all along. I didn’t want to lose that - lose *you*."

"You would never have lost me."

"Maybe. And maybe it seems like marrying you was just an insurance policy

but I know that’s not the way it was. You know why? Because I asked myself

something. I asked myself what it was that I really wanted. And the answer

was simple. All I wanted was you."

She had to take a very deep breath. "You sure know how to sweet talk a

girl."

"Well I’ve had a lot of practice... Ow!!"

"You had to go and ruin it, didn’t you?" she said in mock annoyance.

"So can I ask you a question now?" he asked a little while later as he

rubbed sunscreen on her back.

"We’re taking turns now? Well sure, go ahead."

"Are you sorry we got married the way we did?"

"What? Of course not! I wouldn’t have married you if I didn’t want to."

"No, Mac, I didn’t mean it like that. I meant, are you sorry you didn’t get

to have a big traditional ceremony with all the trimmings."

She thought for a moment before speaking, glad in a way that her back was

towards him. "Are you asking because of Chris? Because if you are you should

know that what you and I did is nothing like how it was back then. I was a

seventeen year old, drunk delinquent who didn’t even know what love was. I

was looking for a way out, and he was there. What we have is so different it

doesn’t even bare thinking about."

He took her shoulder and urged her round to face him. "Mac no, I wasn’t

making that comparison. I just thought a big wedding was something you might

have wanted - regardless of what happened in the past."

The dredged up memories were too close and still painful, but she managed a

small reassuring smile. "Harm, our wedding was wonderful. *Beautiful.* In

its own way it was everything I’ve ever wanted. And while I’d be lying if I

said I hadn’t always pictured the perfect fairy tale white wedding - every

girl does at one point or another - I’m not sorry. I don’t even think I

would have wanted one if we’d had the time and the means to do it. Because

no matter how lovely it was... it wouldn’t have been perfect. Uncle Matt

wouldn’t have been there to give me away... And my mother wouldn’t have been

there to help me get ready, and to sit in the front row crying..."

He put his arms around her then and pulled her against his chest, holding

her close. And she smiled, her face pressed against his warm skin, thinking

that even though the rest of her family life was far from perfect, now she

had him. A new family. And in that respect at least she felt pretty damn

lucky.

Pulling away she spoke lightly, wanting him to know she was okay. "Speaking

of mothers, *Harmon*, just what is yours going to say when she hears about

all of this?"

His eyes widened immediately, and he flopped back onto the sand behind him,

his hands covering his eyes. "Oh God..." he groaned, "I didn’t even think

about that... I haven’t spoken to her in three weeks..." Moving his hands

back over his hair he looked up at her. "You know, she’s already crazy about

you, Mac. It’s me I’m worried about. She is going to be so pissed..."

"About which part?"

"Oh, once she calms down I’m sure she’ll tell me it was the smartest thing I

ever did... It’s the way we went about it she won’t like." He groaned again.

"I am not looking forward to this phone call."

"Well at least you won’t have to actually see her for a while. I, on the

other hand, have to walk right on in to the Admiral’s office and tell him I

married *you*!" she cried in dismay.

Harm couldn’t help it. He laughed. "Oh man, I would *love* to see his

face... Think you could smuggle in one of those tiny little spy cameras and

record his reaction?"

"Harm it’s not funny," she moaned plaintively, "It’s going to be awful!!

*And* I’ll have to tell my Uncle when I go to visit him... I don’t even want

to think about what he’ll have to say..."

"He’ll be mad?" he asked, sober once again.

She shook her head, suppressing an embarrassed grin. "No it’s not that... In

fact his reaction is most likely going to be along the lines of ‘I told you

so’. He was always teasing me about you..."

"Oh really?"

She rolled her eyes. "Don’t let it go to your head, okay?"

"And just what are you suggesting about my ego Major?"

"Simply that it doesn’t need to be fed, Commander."

She was sitting looking down at him at this point, and he grabbed her arms

and pulled her suddenly so that she overbalanced and fell across his chest.

"You know what you are?" he said, wrapping his arms around her back and

holding her in place when she started wriggling, her hands trapped between

them.

"What am I?"

"A handful.," he stated flatly.

"*Only* a handful?"

"Well, maybe a bit more than that."

She pressed her mouth down on his, hard, kissing him thoroughly and as

deeply as she knew how. Then she ended the kiss as suddenly as she started

it, and raised her eyebrows at him.

"Okay, a *lot* more than that," he amended quickly.

She smiled in satisfaction before kissing him again.

* Day Six *

*********************

Through the storm we reach the shore

You give it all but I want more

And I'm waiting for you

(With Or Without You -- U2)

*********************

She clung to him all night long. And he clung right back. They had made love

slowly and passionately, and then settled down, ostensibly to sleep but she

didn’t think either of them actually did. She might have dosed a few times,

but always she woke fully again with her arms around him, the room shrouded

in darkness. The night seemed to last forever. And she wanted it to. Because

this was their last night together.

Eventually though, morning came, as it always does. They rose early as the

room turned ever lighter shades of grey with the pale morning sun. And they

were faced with the prospect of just so many hours left until she had to

leave for the airport. So many hours left before her flight departed. So

many hours left to kill while they waited for their time together to be

over.

It was with a sort of morbid desperation that they considered this. What to

do with themselves today? And so they went jogging along the shoreline,

their feet pounding over the firm wet sand, dodging the waves as they

travelled up the beach. And then they went for breakfast at a fruit juice

bar, eating bagels and drinking power smoothies. Then they went shopping for

souvenirs - things they thought little AJ might like, and Mac found a

charcoal sketch by a local artist that she thought would look good in her

apartment.

Later, back in the hotel room, she sat beside him on the bed while he made a

phone call. A very important phone call. And one he was extremely reluctant

to make, though he knew he had to sooner or later. And all things

considered, the longer he put it off the worse it would be.

"Mom, hi it’s me."

*Hello Harm, how are you?*

"Oh, I’m fine. I’m, uh, calling from Hawaii - remember I told you I was

having shoreleave here?"

*I’m not senile yet, dear.*

"Sorry Mom, I know you’re not senile. You know, Mac’s here with me..."

*Oh really?*

"Yeah, she needed a break from work and so she came out to see me while I

was in port. Anyway, I’m calling because I... *we* have some good news..."

*‘We’ have good news...?!*

"Yeah... Mom, Mac and I -"

*Oh my goodness! Oh Harm I’m so happy for you! Frank!! Frank!!*

Mac watched all this with interest, especially when he suddenly held the

phone away from his ear abruptly.

"She’s yelling for Frank," he explained.

Her eyes widened. "But you didn’t tell her yet. Did she guess?"

He shrugged as his mother continued calling for her husband. "I don’t know

what she thinks. Hold on." He gingerly put the phone back to his ear. "Mom?

Mom! I didn’t even tell you the news yet..."

*Oh you don’t have to. You finally came to your senses and asked that girl

to marry you, didn’t you? Frank!! Oh where is he? Fra-ank!!*

He looked up at Mac again, placing his hand over the receiver. "She thinks I

asked you to marry me."

"Well you did," she said with a grin.

"Mom!" he said, finally gaining her attention again, "Mom, you’re right, I

did propose to Mac. But that’s not all. We... uh..." he cringed, waiting for

the explosion, "We already got married."

Mac could hear the reply clearly from where she was sitting. *What did you

just say?* But Harm simply reached out and took her hand, smiling briefly at

her before speaking again. "Mac and I got married. Three days ago."

He rolled his eyes. "*No* Mom - I did *not* get her pregnant!"

She had to wince at that. They should have expected that reaction. She

returned her attention to the one-sided conversation.

"Well, I guess it does seem like we rushed into it -" she heard him say next

before he was obviously cut off.

"Yeah but -"

"Well why should we have waited when -"

"No, Mom look -"

"Mom, I know I should have let you know sooner but -"

Mac couldn’t help but grin, stifling the urge to laugh out loud as she

watched Harm try to get a word in edgewise. Finally he sighed and held out

the phone to her, looking thoroughly chastised. "She wants to speak to

you."

Hesitantly, she took it. "Mrs Burnett?"

*Oh... dear I think you’d better call me Trish,* the older woman said in a

surprisingly calm voice.

"Well then, please call me Sarah."

*Sarah. Well now, maybe *you* can explain to me why you let my son talk you

into this?*

"Oh, well... He didn’t really have to talk me into anything - it was both

our decisions. Neither of us wanted to wait. And once I leave for DC again,

we might not see each other again for months. I’m sorry we didn’t let you

know sooner Mrs - *Trish*... It just all happened so quickly," she said all

this in a rush, hoping she wouldn’t get berated as Harm had before her.

*But wouldn’t you have preferred a lovely big ceremony, with all your

friends and family with you?*

"Actually, all I really wanted was to marry him. It didn’t matter how we did

it," she said gently but firmly.

*Oh Sarah, I should apologise - I am glad, really I am. I’ve been hoping

that he would finally see how much he cares for you. He always speaks so

highly of you, you know. And I’m so glad that he’s finally found someone...

you’re both going to be very happy, I can tell...*

Mac looked up at Harm then as his mother trailed off, her expression

slightly panicked. "She’s crying!!" she whispered, gesturing frantically for

him to take back the receiver.

"Mom? Are you okay?"

*Harmon Rabb Jr!* came loudly over the phone then, causing Harm to roll his

eyes again and mouth ‘she’s just fine’ to Mac before being caught up in the

conversation.

After a few minutes of ‘yes Mom’ and ‘I know Mom’ he finally ended the phone

call. He looked at her for a moment before saying, "You have to call her and

Frank once you get back home. I think they want to have you over for a

weekend."

"Oh um... okay," she answered tentatively.

"You alright?" he asked, placing a hand on her back.

She smiled, leaning into his side. "Yeah."

"You don’t have to, you know. They just want to get to know you better.

You’re part of the family now."

"I know... it’s just a little overwhelming. It was fine when getting married

was just about the two of us..."

"And now?" he asked, his voice betraying concern for her answer.

"It’s still fine... There’s just a lot to think about, you know?"

"I know. At least Mom’s okay with you. I told you she would be. She can’t

wait to see her new daughter in law. I’m the one she’s mad at."

"Still?"

"Oh yeah. I don’t think she’s going to totally forgive *me* until she has

two or three grandkids sitting in her lap."

"Well, that’s going to be a pretty long time to hold a grudge."

He scrutinised her face after she said this, not seeing anything wrong in

her expression, but he had to ask anyway, just to be sure. "Mac? You know,

four years *is* a pretty long time. Are you sure you’re okay with this?

Cause if you’re not, I want you to tell me."

She looked down at the floor then, frowning slightly. "If I asked you to

come back to JAG, would you?"

He took a deep breath before answering. "Yeah, I would. Is that what you

want?"

She met his gaze again. "No, not really. Well, of course I want you back

there - I want you to get on the plane with me this evening and come home

with me... But more than that, I want you to be happy. And if that means

waiting a few years while you follow your dreams, then I will. It’s not even

a tough decision at all."

"You’re sure?"

"Yes!" she stressed, rolling her eyes. "And you know, it won’t hurt me to be

able to concentrate solely on my career for a while. I haven’t told you this

yet, because nothing’s definite, but I’m up for my promotion again in a few

months."

He grinned widely. "Mac, that’s great! So maybe next time I see you I’ll

have to salute you, huh?"

"You better, Commander!" she laughed, before her face suddenly fell.

"What is it?"

She rose from the bed abruptly. "Nothing," she said as she crossed to her

open suitcase. *Next time I see you...* The words echoed through her head.

God, she hated this. She kept forgetting, and then something would always

remind her again. "You know, I only have a few hours left. I should finish

packing," she said quietly.

She had her back to him, so she didn’t see him approach - grim

understanding, compassion, and his own pain written on his face. But

suddenly he was there, turning her to face him.

"Not yet," he told her, his voice husky soft, and kissed her.

They made love then. Undressing each other slowly, touching each other

suddenly far more important than individual pleasure. Being together was

still so new for them, and yet the feel of their bodies entwined was already

so familiar it was painful. They didn’t speak, instead communicating without

words. Each breath, each sigh, a promise of love. And each caress a

whispered goodbye. They made love. And it was passionate, and beautiful, but

with an underlying desperation that comes with attempting to forestall the

inevitable.

* Day Seven *

*********************

It's easier to believe

In this sweet madness

Oh this glorious sadness

That brings me to my knees

(Angel -- Sarah McLachlan)

*********************

Walking into JAG headquarters in the middle of the day, it was difficult to

believe that only yesterday she’d been in Hawaii. Officially she was still

on leave. But she knew all too well that if she stayed home, she would only

dwell on... everything. Here, at least, she could immerse herself in her

work.

Telling Harriet had been... entertaining. Typically, the lieutenant had

spotted the ring on her finger straight away. Mac had to wonder whether

she’d been looking for it. Once she saw it of course, her eyes widened, her

eyebrows shot up, then her jaw dropped, and she sucked in a deep breath and

Mac *knew* she was about to start squealing. So she grabbed the other woman

by the arm and hauled her into her office before she could make a sound.

Amidst exclamations, spontaneous hugs, and demands to see her ring more

closely, she’d finally managed to explain.

Telling Mic had been... interesting. He’d eased off on his pursuit recently

- she guessed there was only so much rejection a person could take. Still,

the fact that she’d gone away for a week single, and come back married, was

nothing if not a shock for her poor partner. First he’d laughed, asked if it

was a joke, then he became distant and aloof, giving her an icy

congratulations before leaving rapidly. He obviously thought the whole

situation was insane. But at least that was over.

Which left one person she had to speak to.

She entered his office and stood at attention. Back rigid, eyes front,

firmly reminding herself that she was a marine and could handle this.

"Major, good to have you back. How was your leave?"

"Fine, thank you Sir... But Admiral, that’s what I wanted to speak with you

about."

He glanced up at her from the papers in front of him, and nodded briefly.

"Well then, take a seat."

She sat. And then realised she didn’t have the faintest idea how to start.

"What’s all this about Major?" he demanded after a few seconds of silence,

growing impatient. After another moment he looked her straight in the eye

and said, "And tell me it doesn’t have anything to do with that ring on your

finger."

She looked down quickly, realising she’d been twisting it round nervously,

and obviously calling immediate attention to it. "Actually sir, it does,"

she affirmed, finally finding her voice. "I got married during my leave,

Admiral."

There was a pause. "I see." His lips tightened just the tiniest bit. "And

may I ask to whom?"

*Oh God.* "Commander Rabb, sir."

His eye twitched almost imperceptibly. "And... am I to assume..." he began,

then went on in a considerably louder tone. "Oh for God’s sake Major! What

the hell were the two of you thinking?" He pushed away from the desk and

stood up.

"I can’t speak for Commander Rabb. But he proposed to me and I accepted.

Sir." She stated boldly. Nervous or not, she could handle confrontation

better than confession any day.

"And so you went and got *married*?"

"Yes sir."

She watched as he closed his eyes for a brief second, then looked back at

her with his sharp gaze.

"You do realise what this is going to look like, don’t you Major?"

"Sir, with all due respect, the Commander and I maintained a strictly

professional relationship during the time we worked together here at JAG.

However we aren’t serving within the same chain of command anymore,

Admiral."

He considered her for a another few moments, and then nodded once curtly.

"Alright Major, that’s fair enough. You’re dismissed."

He’d dismissed her. With that particular knack he had for dealing with

annoyances, he dismissed her! And she had to leave without having the chance

to explain further, without having any sense of closure... As she left the

room she was keenly aware of his displeasure, and feeling decidedly unhappy

about the whole thing.

A little while later she was back in her office, unable to avoid the fact

that once again, her life had been irrevocably turned upside-down. In true

fashion, Harriet had told Bud, who’d told Tiner, who’d told the rest of the

known world, that she had gone and married Harm. So now she would have

questioning looks to contend with all day, along with people wanting details

(Carolyn wouldn’t leave her alone for long), Mic’s anger (he probably

thought she’d been leading him on), and the Admiral’s general disapproval

(and boy did he ever know how to hold a grudge).

But in a way she was glad for the fallout of her actions. Otherwise she

might begin to feel like the whole week hadn’t happened - as if it was all

some beautiful dream that she’d just woken up from. The whole thing might

not even be real, but for the ring on her finger. It was a bittersweet

feeling, the ambiguity of it all. And it was painful. Because it was a

reminder that she had one glorious week behind her. And six or seven months

of loneliness in front of her.

Setting: Seven months later...

Disclaimer: I don’t own them. You know it. I know it. So sue me if you want

to, oh mighty PTB. You may take my money, but you’ll never take my freedom.

ONE WEEK 11/11

by Desi

* Epilogue *

*********************

And I will squeeze the life out of you

And you will make me laugh and make me cry

And we will never forget it...

(Throw Your Arms Around Me -- Paul McDermott )

*********************

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. Mac now knew without a doubt

that ‘they’ were right. These past few days she’d barely been able to get a

thing done, distracted by the thought that soon, she would see Harm again.

It had been almost seven months since that week in Hawaii. They had managed

to see each other only once during that time - a weekend in Darwin. His ship

had been in the area participating in war games with the Australian Navy,

and she’d flown out to meet him for just a few days. They had laughed about

it, calling it a second honeymoon. But the truth was it seemed almost cruel,

only able to be together for two short days. No, not even that - not even a

whole forty-eight hours.

It was with a fond yet bittersweet smile that she let herself be distracted

for what must have been the fiftieth time that day, as she looked over at

her favourite photo. It was a polaroid, propped up against her pencil jar,

that Harm had sent her when he heard about her promotion. Apparently he’d

gotten a friend to take the photo as he stood at attention, saluting the

camera, but with a big cheesy grin on his face. It was the goofiest picture

she’d ever seen. And she loved it. She knew the message scrawled on the back

by heart. *Congratulations Lt. Colonel! Told you I’d salute, didn’t I? Your

loving flyboy, Harm*

It had been difficult, these past months. So very, very difficult. Relying

on letters, emails and phonecalls to stay in touch - all of which had gotten

steadily longer as the weeks went by.

But today she wasn’t sad - just excited. Because he was coming home tonight

for two whole weeks. And if she could just get all her work finished, she

would be able to start her leave, and go home to wait anxiously for him to

arrive. She’d wanted, naturally, to meet him as he stepped off the plane,

however he’d told her not to - he didn’t know when he would be getting in,

and didn’t want her waiting around for hours. Of course, that’s what she was

going to be doing anyway, just in the dubious comfort of her own home.

Assuming she ever made it home. Daydreaming seemed to be all she was good

for at the moment.

It was just a little after midday when she was out in the bullpen, talking

to Harriet when the elevator doors opened, and for no immediately apparent

reason, she glanced up at the sound.

And suddenly he was there.

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. Mac could readily attest to

this. And so there was absolutely nothing in the world that could have held

her back as she wove around the desks between them in record time and

literally threw herself into his arms.

And this time it *was* a big dramatic reunion - just like in the movies. He

dropped his bags just in time to be nearly bowled over as he caught her up

in his embrace, and wrapped his arms around her. And after simply holding

tightly for one breathless moment, they pulled away just enough for their

lips to meet in a needy, passionate kiss. Both heedless of the audience they

had.

Once they finally began to surface, Mac pulled away to look at him in

disbelief, one hand stroking his face the other clutching at his shoulder.

"Harm what are you doing here? You weren’t supposed to arrive till late

tonight!"

"We got in early, so I took the first flight here I could," he explained,

reaching up to take her hands in his - putting a little distance between

them before finally turning his attention to the rest of the room.

They maintained constant contact though, as he was greeted by various

people. They held hands as Bud and Harriet came over to say hello, and her

arm went protectively around his waist as Mic approached. But she needn’t

have worried. He had settled down into the simple role of friend and

colleague in recent months, and now he reached out amicably to shake hands

with Harm. Thankfully no hostility present in the exchanged words.

The Admiral emerged from his office just then, apparently able to sense the

commotion going on outside.

"Commander Rabb," he announced gruffly, "Nice of you to drop by. I hear

you’ve been doing some fine work lately."

"Thank you Admiral. I know I’m just visiting, sir, but it feels good to be

here."

The two watched as the former Seal dropped his considering gaze to their

tightly joined hands, resisting the urge to spring away from each other

under the scrutiny. But then his expression softened, almost imperceptibly.

"Well Colonel, I don’t see much point in you sticking around here the rest

of the day..." he trailed off meaningfully.

"Thank you sir," she said, not bothering to hide her smile.

"So as long as you’ve finished up all your work you’re officially on

leave."

"Yes sir."

He turned away then, his manner brusque as usual. And if anyone had really

been looking, they might have seen the slightly amused twist to his

features. Mac, however, was facing Harm with a decidedly crestfallen look on

her face.

"I still have to finish up the Baker case file... It’ll take an hour at

least," she moaned, wanting nothing more than to grab her husband and take

him home.

"Don’t worry Colonel, I’ve got it covered," Mic spoke up then, still

standing nearby. "No arguments - you covered for me the other week,

remember? I owe you one."

She grinned sardonically. "I don’t actually think I was going to argue, but

thanks all the same Mic. I really appreciate it."

And having it all settled, she ducked into her office and retrieved her

things and the file, which she thrust into Brumby’s hands on the way past

him. Then she reached for Harm’s hand again, and together they all but ran

to the elevator. They were kissing before the doors slid shut.

*********************

There’s no aphrodisiac like loneliness...

( No Aphrodisiac -- The Whitlams )

*********************

It was quite possibly one of the most wonderful things in the world to wake

up in the arms of the person you loved, especially after an extended absence

from one another.

"Hi..." She greeted him with a sleepy, contented smile.

He pressed a kiss to her hair. "Good morning."

She rolled onto her back and stretched before turning to settle against him

once more, her eyes closing again. "I missed you," she murmured, running her

hand over his chest, her aim not to arouse, simply loving the feel of him so

warm and close.

"Missed you too," he responded, though the words seemed inadequate for the

emotions they described.

She groaned slightly then, as she pulled her fingers through her hair. "We

only slept for a few hours... No wonder I don’t want to wake up."

"Just go back to sleep then," he soothed, his hand rubbing up and down her

spine.

Still not opening her eyes, she shook her head, her nose brushing his

shoulder. "No, I don’t want to go back to sleep either." She couldn’t see

his answering smile, but she knew it was there.

"Want me to go make some coffee then?"

She tightened her grip on him. "No. Stay here."

"Okay... She doesn’t want to sleep, doesn’t want to wake up, doesn’t want

coffee," he mused, "What does she want, then?" He watched her face, loving

the way her nose crinkled in amusement, her eyes still steadfastly closed.

Then she sighed. "Just hold me."

"Mac?" he asked softly a few minutes later, wondering if she had, in fact,

fallen asleep again.

But then she spoke. "Yeah?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"Of course you can. What is it?"

"It’s about Brumby... I was just curious... He mentioned you covering for

him last week..."

"Harm, you’re not still worried about Mic and I are you?" she asked quietly

- she was feeling far to cosy and content to get upset about anything just

then. "You shouldn’t be. He isn’t chasing after me any more. He even has a

new girlfriend. He was talking about a favour I did him a week and a half

ago. I took over a case for him so he could spend some extra time with

her."

"Oh... Sorry Mac, it’s just that you never really mention him in letters or

when we talk... I thought you might not have been saying anything so I

wouldn’t get upset."

"I haven’t been saying anything because there isn’t anything to say," she

told him as firmly as could be expected when she was far more interested in

the feel of his hand against her back, and the smoothness of his chest

beneath her cheek.

"Well, that’s okay then."

Now, finally, she opened her eyes to look at him. "Did you really think he

would continue chasing after an obviously happily married woman? I know you

never liked him but he’s not that bad."

He shrugged. "I don’t know, I don’t think I’d put anything past him..." he

began, then quickly amended upon seeing her face, "Okay, you’re right. Mic

Brumby is a wonderful person who doesn’t deserve my recriminations."

She rolled her eyes. "Well I don’t know about that. He can be pretty

annoying sometimes."

"Glad to hear some things haven’t changed. So who’s this new girlfriend of

his?"

"Oh, she’s career Navy, a health worker over at Bethesda. Tall, blonde, long

legs. You’d like her."

"Ouch. Guess I deserved that one."

"In the worst possible way."

"But you know what?"

"What?"

"I like you more."

"Glad to hear it." She sighed then, thinking about how much she’d missed

this. Missed his smile, the sound of his voice... Missed the way he could be

so corny and sweet at times, and so passionate at others...

He read her mind, seemingly, or else the read the emotions in her eyes

because the next thing he said was, "God I missed you, Mac."

That was another thing - she missed the way he said her name. Hardly anyone

else called her Mac anymore - it was either Sarah or Colonel. It might not

be the most attractive name, but to her it was as much an endearment as

anything when he said it .

"Yeah I know," she replied, and reached her head up to kiss him.

"Hey you remember Quicksilver? Uh... Lt. Silverburg, my RIO?" he asked, once

they’d settled down again.

"Yeah, why?"

"His wife had twins a few weeks ago - identical boys. They were born a month

premature, but they’re okay now. The poor guy was so desperate to see them

he was seriously considering going AWOL for a while there. He’s on leave now

though - same two weeks as me..."

"Wow," she said quietly, "Were they his first kids?"

"Yeah. Should have seen him when he finally got to speak to his wife on the

phone, and she held the phone so he could hear the babies crying... started

bawling himself. It was pretty amazing."

She couldn’t help but hurt inside. How could she not? Knowing that this

wonderful sense of being with him was only temporary, and that it would be

years before she would have him the way she wanted. And years before she

could see him cry over their own newborn baby. She almost didn’t notice when

he started speaking again.

"You know, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately - especially since all

this stuff with Silverburg - and while I don’t know about you, I can’t help

but think that the four years we agreed on? It just seems far too long."

Now she simply stared at him, speechless.

"And... if you want, I’m going to see if I can have my designation changed

back. The Captain spoke to me just a little while ago... I didn’t tell you

this, but he said that there wasn’t really much hope of me advancing further

with my flying... He didn’t say I *had* to give it up, but that’s what he

was suggesting. And you know what? The thought of doing just that didn’t

bother me as much as I thought it would."

Now she was propped up on one elbow, her eyes wide, but still unable to say

a thing, so he pressed on.

"These seven months have been awful, I know, for both of us. I keep thinking

about what you said - ages ago - about wanting a simple life. And I think

that’s what I want, sooner rather than later. What about you? I mean, it

sounds kind of appealing, don’t you think? Settling down, being a normal

couple, maybe start work on that kid we talked about?" He realised he was

starting to babble, but she was just staring at him so intently. "Mac?" he

prompted.

And then she started to cry.

Which wasn’t exactly the reaction he’d been hoping for, but he quickly

gathered her to him, stroking her hair and making soothing noises. "Mac,

sweetheart it’s okay. Tell me what is it?"

Sniffling, she pulled away to look at him, and she was smiling underneath

the tears on her face. "I’m sorry," she gulped back a sob, "It’s just... I

don’t think I know how to be happy like this."

"Well, we’re going to have to do something about that," he said and kissed

her cheeks gently, removing the moisture there with his soft lips.

Her mouth sought and found his in a slow, sensuous and loving kiss. Then she

drew away, her fingers lightly stroking his jaw. "Harm, everything is going

to be perfect now, I just know it."

"Yeah, well just wait till we start living together for real," he said with

a grin, "We’re both used to being on our own - we’ll probably drive each

other crazy! May not be as perfect as you expect straight away - might take

some time to adjust."

Easily matching his light mood, now that all previous, lingering sadness was

gone, she prodded him in the chest. "Don’t rain on my parade, okay? And

anyway, I don’t care. I don’t care if all we do is argue all day," her voice

suddenly became sober again, "I just don’t want to be alone anymore."

"Mac, sweetheart, you won’t be, I promise."

She gave him a funny look.

"What?"

"You just called me ‘sweetheart’. You did it a few minutes ago too. That’s

the first time you’ve ever called me anything like that."

"Is it? Oh. Well... do you mind?"

The funny look was replaced by a smile. "No, I don’t mind. I kind of like

it," she said, and placed her arms more firmly around him, pulling him

closer and pressing her face to his chest once more. "It feels... *real*"

THE END