Date: Fri, 06 Jun 1997 23:07:01 -0700 From: Bill Hart (by way of Phaedrus ) Subject: SRU: Hiding Out Spells 'R Us: Hiding Out by Bill Hart Once again Jonathan Warner arrived at the mall in search of the elusive store. He desperately needed to find the store before _they_ found him. His life was at stake. His friends had told him it was in the mall. But they didn't give him the exact location. And sometimes the locations given conflicted with others. The only thing that was consistent was the warning "Beware of the old man who runs the shop." Jon had heard the rumors about the old man and his spells. He wasn't sure he believed them. But it was an option to investigate. Besides, being a live buxom coed was infinitely superior to being a dead example for a loan shark's surviving clientele. Just as he had done every day for the past week, he entered the mall at the little used entrance. He sat down on one of the benches just inside the door to contemplate how he'd search the mall today. He looked up. "I'll be damned." he whispered softly to himself. There was the store, as plain as the nose on his face. Spells 'R Us. * * * * * Alric, an apprentice wizard, had just arrived in the backroom of the shop. The Council of Wizards had assigned him to watch over the shop while the old man was gone, just like the time he'd watched the shop before when the old man had taken a vacation. But this time was different. The old man had just disappeared. And, if you could believe the rumor, he was dead. That was a frightening rumor. Anyone who could kill a wizard as powerful as the old man. . . Just then, the tinkle of the bell over the door interrupted his thoughts. There was a customer in the shop. He shifted into the semblance of the old man and went out to greet to his customer. "Good morning, Jonathan. Or would you prefer to be called Jon?" "Jon... will be fine. But how did you know my name?" "Its really a simple wizard's parlor trick, Jon. Please, don't tell anybody I told you that. It'll just ruin the mystique of the shop." "Sure. Whatever you say." "Good. Now what do you need?" "I need some help. . ." "No, no. Don't tell me." interrupted Alric. "We really need to consider the mystique of the shop once again." Alric frowned. "You know, you are in quite a lot of trouble. You shouldn't borrow from loan sharks, especially if you aren't going to be able to pay them back." "I know. But my friends said you might be able to help me. Can you?" Alric scrutinized his client very carefully. "I believe I have exactly what you need in the backroom. Wait here." Jon paced back and forth. "Hurry up, old man." he thought. "I haven't got all day." "Here it is." said Alric as he re-entered the room carrying a small vial. "This will be perfect for your needs. All you need to do is follow a few simple instructions and all of your problems will vanish. "You need to go someplace where you want to fit in undetected. Then, simply drink the potion. You'll fall asleep. A little later, you'll wake up. And when you do, you will be completely unrecognizable to all of the loan shark's goons. In fact, even your own mother won't be able to recognize you." "That's great. How much?" "How much is it worth?" "Look old man, don't play games with me. My life is in jeopardy." "I'm sorry. How about a dollar?" "One dollar??" "Not enough?" asked Alric. "No, that will be perfect." "Then its a deal." Jon took a dollar out of his wallet and handed it to Alric, who, in return, gave Jon the vial. "Have a nice day, Jon." said Alric as he waved a hand at the leaving Jon. "Imagine that." he thought. "Less than an hour on the job, and I've already made my first dollar. The Council will be pleased." * * * * * "What a moron." thought Jon as he walked across the campus. "How could anyone be taken in by that old fool." He needed to find a place where he wanted "to fit in undetected." He had determined that someplace on campus would be best. But where? Wandering around the campus hadn't been much help either. He'd aimlessly wandered up to the Sigma Beta Beta sorority house. He had considered drinking from the vial inside their house, but he didn't really want to be a coed. He really wanted to find some place where he'd be regularly fed, have a roof over his head, and not have to worry about running away from anybody. There weren't many places like that around. "There he is! Get him!" came a voice from across the quad. "Oh shit!" exclaimed Jon as he ran into the house better known as the 'Sorority of Buxom Babes.' "Womanhood, here I come." Jon found a chair in the hall and sat down. He unstoppered the vial, then quickly drank the contents. There was a momentary dizziness. A big yawn. And silence. * * * * * When Jon woke, he was confused. He didn't know where he was. He felt strange. Smaller. Following a cursory examination, he wasn't all that shocked to discover he was female. It was what he had expected when he was forced into the sorority house. He was now a she. She opened her eyes and looked around. She was sprawled on a bed in a room that screamed femininity. Obviously, she now resided in the sorority house. She was suddenly pleased. There was a large dresser with an even larger mirror along the wall. She could see her reflection. "I'm beautiful." she thought. "This might not be as bad as I thought. I doubt I'll ever have to pay for another meal. That old man was right, my mother would never recognize me now." Once again, she sprawled languorously on the bed. She sought, in her mind, for her name. Kitty. Her name was Kitty. "What a sexy name." she thought. "Sure to drive males wild." Then the door to her room opened. It was CeeJay Larson. Now she knew for sure she was still in the sorority house, her new home. "Kitty. There you are! I've been looking all over for you." And in naming her, CeeJay had completed the spell. All memory of being Jon Warner vanished from her mind. No one remembered Jon Warner. She was Kitty now. In fact, she had always been Kitty. "Are you ready to go down to breakfast?" asked CeeJay. "Breakfast. I'm starved." thought Kitty. Then she looked up at CeeJay and answered "Meow." END