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Blonde Jokes51. Q: What do you call a brunette with a blonde on either side? A: An interpreter. 52. Q: What do you call a blonde between two brunettes? A: A mental block. 53. Q: How do you change a blonde's mind? A1: Blow in her ear. A2: Buy her another beer. 54. Q: What do you say to a blonde that won't give in? A: "Have another beer." 55. Q: What do blondes do with their arseholes in the morning? A: Pack their lunch and send them to work. 56. Q: What's the first thing a blonde does in the morning? A1: Introduces themself. A2: Walks home. 57. Q: Why did the blonde keep ice cubes in the freezer? A: So she could keep the refriderator cold. 58. Q: How did the blonde break her leg playing hockey with the Toronto Maple Leafs? A: She fell out of the tree. 59 Q: What can strike a blonde without her even knowing it? A: A thought. 60. Q: How many blondes does it take to play Hide and Seek? A: One. 61. Q: Why couldn't the blonde write the number ELEVEN ? A: She didn't know what ONE came first... 62 Q: What do you call a blonde without an asshole? A: Divorced. 63. A blonde and a brunette were talking one day. The brunette said that her boyfriend had a slight dandruff problem but she gave him "Head and Shoulders" and it cleared it up. The blonde asked inquisitively, "How do you give shoulders?" 64. Person 1: What's the difference between a blonde and garbage? Person 2: Garbage gets taken out at least once a week. Person 1: Wrong. You tie the garbage up before you take it out. 65. Q: Why is a blonde like a door knob? A: Because everybody gets a turn. A: So they know when to stop having sex! 66. Q: WHAT DO YOU CALL 10 BLONDES AT THE BOTTOM OF THE POOL? A: AIR POCKETs. 67. Q: Why do blondes hate M&Ms? A: They're too hard to peel. 68. Q: What did Jimmy Swaggart pay for his prostitute and her four blonde friends? A: Regular price, four bucks, four bucks, four bucks, four bucks. 69. Q: What does "Bones" McCoy say before he performs brain surgery on a blonde? A: "Space. The final frontier......" 70. Q: How many blondes does it take to screw the entire Bengals team? A: Just One... Boomer Esiason. 71. Q: What's brown and red and black and blue? A: A brunette who's told one too many blonde jokes. 72. Q: What is it called when a blonde blows in another blonde's ear? A: Data transfer. 73. Q: What does a blonde say when you blow i A: "Thanks for the refill!" 74. Q: How can you tell which blonde is the waitress? A: She is the one with the tampon behind her ear, wondering what she did with her pencil. 75. Q: What did the blonde customer say to the buxom waitress (reading her nametag) ? A: "'Debbie'...that's cute. What did you name the other one ?" 76. Q: Why do blondes have more fun? A1: Because they don't know any better. A2: They are easier to keep amused. 77. Q: How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? A1: "What's a lightbulb?" A2: One. She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her. A3: Two. One to hold the Diet Pepsi, and one to call, "Daaady!" 78. Q: What's a blonde's favourite wine? A: "Daaaddy, I want to go to Miaaami!" 79. Q: What do you call a basement full of blondes? A: A wine cellar. 80. Q: Why are there no dumb brunettes? A: Peroxide. 81. Q: Why does NASA hire peroxide blondes? A: They're doing research on black holes. 82. Q: WHAT DO YOU CALL A BLONDE WITH A RUNNY NOSE? A: Full. 83. Imitation of a blonde refuelling.. (Flap hand, blowing air into ears) 84. Q: WHY DON'T BLONDES BREASTFEED THEIR BABIES? A: It hurts too much when they boil their nipples. 85. Q: What does a blonde say when she gives birth? A: Gee, Are you sure it's mine? 86. Q: What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant? A: "Are you sure it's mine?" 87. Q: What do you call 10 blondes standing ear to ear? A: A wind tunnel. 88. Q: What do you call 15 blondes in a circle? A: A dope ring. 89. Q: Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, a dumb blonde, and a smart blonde are walking down the street when they spot a $10 bill. Who picks it up? A1: The dumb blonde! because, there is no such thing as Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, or a smart blonde. A2: None of them. There is no such thing as Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy or a smart blonde and the dumb blonde thought it was a gum wrapper. 90. Q: Why did the blonde scale the glass wall? A: To see what was on the other side. 91. Q: What do you do when a blonde throes a hand grenade at you? A: Pull the pin and throw it back. 92. Q: Why do blondes take the pill? A: So they know what day of the week it is. 93. Q: Why did the blonde stop using the pill? A: Because it kept falling out. 94. Q: Why did the blonde have a sore navel? A: Because her boyfriend was also blond! 95. Q: If a blonde and a brunette are tossed off a building, who hits the ground first? A: The brunette. The blonde has to stop to ask for directions. 96. Q: What happens when a blonde gets Alzheimers disease? A: Her IQ goes up! 97. Q: What's the difference between Indiana and a blonde? A: A blonde has larger hills and deeper valleys. 98. Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a Porsche? A: You don't lend the Porsche out to your friend. 99. Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a toothbrush? A: You don't let your best friend borrow your toothbrush. 100. Q: What do you call a blonde wearing a leather jacket on a motorcycle? A: Rebel without a clue. |
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