In spite of the frightful English pronunciation of many Japanese, I will put most English words below in correct form for easy reading. I may not be able to resist the occasional "Senk yu" (Thank you), "Velly difficarto" (Very difficult), "Pureeez weeeto" (Please wait) or "Noooo probrem!" (No problem), but the rest should be standard spellings.
Situation: You are staying with a Japanese friend and want to do some shopping over the next few days, but are a bit short on yen. You ask your friend (in Japanese) "Could you tell me where there is a bank nearby? I would like to change some money". He pauses, then gives the standard hissing intake of breath before replying.
"Phssssssssst! Hnnnnnnnn, sooouuudessuneeee! Bank desu ka? Hnnnnnnnn, muzukashiiiii desu neeeee! (Hmmmm... A bank? So difficult) [I'm] sooo sorry, can�t say. Please wait! I must call Random-san".
He telephones any random friend, relative or other Japanese, urgently explains the situation and you overhear the words "Hazukashii desu neee?! Doushiyou ka naaa?!" His friend evidently provides some good advice, as he nods several hundred times and thanks them profusely before hanging up the phone.
(on the phone) Hai! Hai! Hai! Hai! Hai! Doumo sumimasendeshita�.(Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Thank you so much...!)
(to you) Ah, soooo sorry! Zis velly difficult! Velly, velly sorry! Butto� nooo probrem! Ah senk yu!" He bows very low, as if acknowledging a standing ovation from the stage.
A pause. You decide to try again.
You: Ummm� Sorry, could you tell me where the BANK is?
Your friend looks incredibly uncomfortable, goes bright red and starts again:
"Ah, sooo sorriiiii�. Velly difficult�"
You interrupt to thank your friend for his "help". The next day, you go for a walk, and see a bank just across the road. You change your money without any difficulty.
A chance to test your cultural competency: What was going on/wrong here?