I was still dressing, and still keeping it secret from almost everyone I knew. One ex girlfriend effectively knew, but nothing was said, she was also the *only* person I had told of my assault years before.
My continuing struggle to find work resulted in my going to Bosnia for six months at the end of 1998. Whilst unable to dress during that period my fantasy life was alive and well... some of my thoughts would not have gone down well with my colleagues had they known!
The country, its history and the developing conflict in Kosovo at the time were all terrifically depressing but I was with a girl (back home) now who was a *fantastic* stabilising influence and our love for each other was growing steadily. I suspect that is what made the difference between Bosnia being my descent into full mental problems (as it so easily could have been) and the turning point it finally became.