This Glassy Surface>

Don’t wander through this glassy surface

Expecting to find more than me

‘Cause what am I without a purpose

But a lone mirage to see

~ ~ ~ ` ~ ~ ~ ` ~ ~ ~ ` ~ ~ ~ ` ~ ~ ~

“We can’t do this Josh...” the blond whispered backing further into the corner.

“Of course we can.... it’s time.... we can’t hide forever...” JC Chasez said softly. He gently touched the blonds shoulder. Lance shrank away.

“Don’t!! That’s what got us into this in the first place......” he hissed sliding down to sit on the floor. Josh sighed. He was tired of pretending. Everyone knew already... they were only going to tell the truth and get it over with.

“Come on Baby... we’ve done a thousand press conferences before... this one is no different...” he crouched in front of the younger man.

“No different?” Lance asked his head shooting upward. “This is the end of everything, Josh! Our careers... the band.... our lives end if we go out there....” Lance whispered. His voice pained.

“No they won’t Lance... life goes on... we still have each other and the guys.... we don’t know how the news will change things... if it changes things at all....”

“You don’t understand Josh... you’re parents were so caring and understanding when we told them about us. My Mom hasn’t really spoken to me in 3 months... the day after we told her she tried to set me up with a friend’s daughter... When we do speak she acts like we never told her..” Lance explained.

“You can’t be the perfect son... no one can.... every parent has a set idea of who and what their children will be. No one ever fits it to a T.... but your smart, kind, handsome, and talented.... you don’t smoke, drink, do drugs, kill, rob, or sleep around. As far as I can tell that’s about as perfect as a child can be Lance!”

“It’s not good enough....” Lance whispered. Josh stood in frustration and anger.

“So I’m not good enough? You want to deny what you are and pretend to be a good little straight boy?... It doesn’t work Lance! We’ve both tried that and failed.... quite frankly I enjoy having you fuck my brains out.... If I’m not mistaken you enjoyed it just as much James Lance Bass!” Josh yelled. “And I’m tired of lying and hiding all the time. Of not being able to share a hotel room with you, or hold your hand, or look into YOUR eyes when I sing a love song. The world isn’t fair. It’s time you realized it and moved on with your life...” Josh’s voice dropped to a tired whisper. “Everybody already knows... they have for weeks now.. All we have to do is go out there and say it’s true.... Don’t you see Lance... we’ll be free to be together...”

“I just can’t Josh....”

“Are you gay?”

“Yes...”

“Do you love me?

“Of course I do!”

“Then why do you care if the world knows?... all I’ve wanted, since I realized how much I love you, was to shout it out to the world.... We can finally have that.... and you won’t let yourself.” Josh whispered. “Whether you come out or not... I am... they have pictures of me with Daniel... I’m cornered....” getting no response he felt his temper flare again. “If your closet means so much to you... then live in it for the rest of your life... I love you Lance, just don’t expect me to cower right beside you....” Josh turned from his lover, pulling the door open and slamming it closed behind him.

The reporters standing outside eagerly rushed forward. Josh was rescued by the two bodygaurds hired as personal security. Once regaining his composure he made his way to the stage up front. Once he had everyone’s attention he began his statement.

Lance peaked around the doorway. All eyes were directed at his love. Josh looked nervous but determined. Lance yearned for that. A wave of self confidence sweep through him as he slipped along the outer perimeter unnoticed. He squared his shoulders stepping up behind Josh. Tapping his boyfriend on the shoulder he smiled for the first time all day. Josh turned in surprise. Blue met green.

“What are you...?” Lance silenced him with an even bigger smile. He turned to look out over the crowd of reporters and fans. His eyes met Josh’s again.

“Shhh.... you’re worth it Josh... no more hiding...” he said quietly.

“Really?” Josh’s voice was hesitant.

“Yeah... now lets give them something for the front page of every newspaper and magazine in the world...” he answered. Josh smiled, stepping closer. Lance leaned forward pressing his lips to JC’s. Arms encircled waists, eyes closed, and tongues danced together, invading each other’s mouths. Josh threaded his fingers in Lance’s hair, pressing their bodies closer together.

The press scribbled notes.

The photographers snapped pictures.

And the world applauded....