The following is a cookie based on Midnight Blue’s “The Mirror of Maybe”. It was written with all

due respect to Midnight and isn’t meant to be taken as a possible future scene or outcome. It is a

thought that popped up into my head at 1AM and begged to be written. So here is a cookie of what

I think would happen when Harry confessed to Sev his private name and true identity.

 

Written by: [email protected]

 

 

A Confession to Make

 

 

“Severus?” came a soft word. It was spoken between two quiet gasps. Yet, held a question in it’s

tone.

 

“Yes, Ash?” Severus’s smoky voice was spoken from somewhere around Harry’s right nipple. He

shuddered and arched his hips upward into Severus’ abdomen.

 

“Stop a sec...” Harry whispered. The warm hot mouth stopped moving and a thin face slowly rose

back into view. Harry wiped at the sweaty hair on the older man’s forehead.

 

“What is it? What’s wrong?” Severus asked. He pushed himself up higher to brace on his elbows.

The man laying under him cupped the back of his neck and pulled him back down again.

 

“I.” he stopped, mouth slightly open. “I’m not all that you think I am. My past, you...” he trailed off

again. Severus offered him a rare smile.

 

“I don’t care.”

 

“You should, you would if you knew who I really am. You’d hate me.” Harry answered. Severus

frowned.

 

“Why would I hate you, Ash? What about you is so horrible then, hmm? Because I doubt it’s worse

then having once been a loyal and true Deatheater.” he sneered the word out with more spite then

Harry could actively remember ever hearing in his voice. Harry sighed and pulled away.

 

“If you don’t want to do this then just say so. It wouldn’t be the first time someone changed his mind

partway through.” Harry sighed and ran a hand through his thick brown hair.

 

“It’s not that I don’t want to do this. I really really want to do this. With you. I just can’t. You’ll hate

me for it later.” he moved to get up from the bed. Long arms wrapped around him from behind.

Harry had felt it coming and still had to resist the urge to tighten up and break away.

 

“Tell me.” came the quiet order. Harry fought back tears.

“You’ll leave.”

 

“No, I won’t.”

 

Silence. It went on forever and then Harry spoke. Harry felt a single tear fall from his right eye.

 

“I now grant you permission to use my private name....” he paused for a moment when he felt

Severus tense and tighten behind him. “Harry James Potter.” the body behind him moved away

slowly.

 

“You’re lying.” the voice cracked minutely. Harry shook his head and sat forward putting his

face in his hands and bracing his arms on his spread knees. “Harry *bloody* Potter?” a question.

A scoff. “I don’t believe you.” the voice was low and dangerous. Harry sighed deeply and looked

up at the ceiling.

 

“It’s the truth, Severus. The-Boy-Who-Lived. Harry *bloody* Potter. The bane of your

existence...” he stopped himself again. He let himself be grabbed harshly and pulled backward

onto the bed. Strong arms braced themselves on his shoulders, pressing him painfully into the

mattress. He looked up into angry black eyes.

 

“Harry Potter is a 16 year old boy. You are not. Now explain!” the words were growled low

in a deep throat.

 

“I am Harry Potter. I was born on  July 31, 1981 to James Potter and Lily Evans Potter. I grew

up at #4 Privet Drive and my best friends are Hermione Granger and Ronald Weasley. But I am,

however, no more 16 years old then you are an active Deatheater.”

 

“You’re not making any sense!” Severus was angry and confused and he wanted answers.

 

“It’s a disguise spell. You can’t break it with an anti-glamour. Only I know how to remove it. I’m

29 years old, Severus. I’ve lived the next 11 and a half years already. In my mind I am a fully

trained adult War Mage. I’ve already lived through the coming war. I watched my friends, my

loved ones die at the hands of Voldemort and I had to stop it from happening again. The mirror.

Last summer at the end of year ball. I got sucked in and I saw my future. It spit me back out, after

I had already witnessed, lived through, the next decade and more. I’m not the same Harry Potter

who went in to that god-forsaken mirror.” Harry cried. He looked up into the face he adored so

much. “I’m sorry if I disappointed you. Everything you know about me has been the truth. My

name is War Mage Ash. Only those closest to me call me Harry anymore. And I’m sorry if I

deceived you. I just…”

 

“Just what? Wanted to play me for a fool? To embarrass me?” came the cold voice. Harry felt his

heart constrict.

 

“I just wanted to love you again. To be with you again. In my world you were taken from me and

then I came back and you were here. Just like I remembered and I knew things, had experienced

more in a half an hour then anyone, even me can really comprehend. I lived 12 years minute by

minute, day by day. Every moment is as vivid in my mind as any other memory and it was real to

me. I loved you and you loved me back. I needed you, but I couldn’t do the things I needed to do,

be with you the way I ached to be with you if the world saw me as a 16 year old child.” Harry

sighed. “I’m sorry.” Harry let himself go limp against the mattress.

 

“Why should I believe you?” the voice was calm and tight. Harry couldn’t look at him. He looked

toward the bathroom and summoned the wet face cloth he had used early in the evening from

beside the sink.

 

“Scars like mine can’t be hidden my magic. I had to use more muggle means.” he handed the cloth

to Severus who took it shakily and scrubbed at his forehead. Harry resisted the wince the harsh

treatment tried to force out of him. His scar was still as numbed as before but was exceedingly

tender with the recent increase of Voldemort’s activities as of late. He watched the dark eyes widen

and the defeat spread across the face hovering above his own. Severus reached up and traced the

long jagged scar resting above Harry’s right eye. He looked almost heart broken. Harry swallowed

his own heart ache and fought to control his shaking hands. Severus hadn’t noticed them yet. “I

release you from your promises.”

 

“Promises?”

 

“You promised me once that you would always love me, no matter what, but since technically you

aren’t really you and haven’t made such promises yet, I release you from it now. I release you from the

promise you made five minutes ago when you promised you wouldn’t leave. I think there is probably

nothing you want to do more than leave now and never look back. Again I apologize.” Harry

whispered. He closed his eyes and tried not to react when the long body stood from the bed and the

sound of door closing floated through the room. Harry curled on his side and let himself cry, really cry

for the first time in years.

 

It was at that moment that he felt a surge of love and concern flow through him. Hagrid. Harry smiled

Half-heartedly and through his heart magic connection tried to reassure his old friend.

 

 

…