Week 10 � With eyes turned to the stars
Writing has failed me twice, now. I just can�t get anything to say what I want it to. Well, what to say� what to say� Samecool, go ahead and post Supplement 4, even though I told you not to. I guess I realized that it doesn�t much matter, if it goes up exactly six months afterwards or not. The irony of all this is that I�m actually feeling a lot better today than I have been for quite some time now.
What do I have to say on life, the universe, and everything tonight? Well, I have this to say �there�s something wrong tonight, the world will have to wait�. It�s a line from The World Will Have To Wait, by Carfax Abbey. It�s shorter than what I usually have to say, so you people should be happy.
You know, I�ve been reading all of my columns again. I like the early ones, they were a lot better than the newer ones are. Supplement 1 was the best, I�d say. Supplement 2 was really quite a deviation, and Supplement 4 was the only time that I�ve ever stayed with one topic for a whole column. (end as of March 27th)
(resumption, April 8th) Wow, my legs have finally stopped shaking, that�s good, I guess. Today was the day of the annual Freshman Retreat. In other words, this was a day that us freshman got to take off school in order to �learn about differences�. I must say that I don�t think anyone learned a damn thing. But I�m rambling, I should answer why it is that my legs were shaking. You see, they split the freshman up into to two groups by English class, one group went on Tuesday, the other on Thursday. Well, most of my friends went on Tuesday, so I got stuck hanging around with Samecool at the breaks, but I suppose that ain�t all so bad. That�s not the reason, though. Y�see, I was really hoping that K was going on the first day, but then she was at school on Tuesday. So, I figured �hey, no big deal. She probably isn�t gonna go, some of my friends aren�t�. Unfortunately, this was not the case. Of course, given my luck, this means that the quad where we go during breaks is about the size of my bedroom (which ain�t exactly huge), and K spends the whole goddamn time wandering around, often times RIGHT IN FUCKING FRONT OF ME! And, well, you can�t really understand it until you�ve been on my end. Speaking of not understanding�
Samecool and �the Caravan� (read �the people Samecool has hung around with since, like, second grade�) have kicked �Tim� out of the spot where they eat lunch because of his habitual use of profanity (help� I can�t get K�s face out of my head�). Of course, they never minded when Jeff, one of the caravanites, swore. And they only cared a little when I did. Besides which, there was, like, a week or two when �Tim� stopped swearing, and of course, �the Caravan� didn�t start treating �Tim� like a human during those times; as a matter of fact, I�d say they actually acted worse then. What really bothers me about this is the fact that the one who kicked �Tim� out is always going on with religious shit. I mean, the fuck ever happened to �love thy neighbor�? It�s not right, man, it�s just not right�
Now, onto a rare 6th paragraph. The reason why I chose the name Orpheus. It wasn�t because of the Greek mythology character, though I am willing to go to Hell and back for what I believe in (oh, I�ve also started drawing, not well, mind you, but I enjoy it). It isn�t because of the White-Wolf game, though I must say that it is one of their better games. It�s actually because of a line from the Cr�xshadows song �Cassandra�: �Like Orpheus with hope entangled � your path was mapped about your feet � leading backward into forgiveness � or forward to a fool�s retreat�. It�s kind of like the way I work up in the head. Even when I know what I have to do to make something right, I�m just gonna keep going to try and make it what I think is right, not what other people think it is. Hell, it�s that kind of thinking that landed me in the incident with K earlier this year�
Well, I�m gonna take a break from doing the column for a while, but feel free to send stuff to [email protected]. I leave you with these last words from a Switchblade Symphony song: �My wings will pull me up into the sky�. I can only hope that mine will do the same.