No More Princess...an "Allie" story

No More Princess...an “Allie” story (ageplay, M/f)

(Author’s Note: This is a different type of story for me. I started it in response to something an online friend did to me. She knows who she is. It’s just something I had to write. There’s a sweetness but also a true sadness about this story. It’s not my typical ‘good girl turns bad, gets spanked, all’s well that end’s well’ type of story. If that’s what you’re looking for, then you might want to skip this one.)

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Hi, my name is Allie. I’m 6 years old and I live with my mommy and daddy and my dog, Luke. He’s a golden retriever. It’s so neat: you throw something and he goes and brings it back. I don’t even do that.

I’m in first grade at school. My teacher says I’m very smart. I’m a little smart-assed, too. Daddy says I’m cheeky. I don’t mean to be. Must be all that smart stuff inside me doesn’t know where to go, so it comes out my mouth. Mommy says I’m sassy. I think they all mean the same, though.

You know what happens when you’re sassy to a grown-up, though? Besides the fact that they get mad? Well, in my house if you’re sassy, you get your mouth washed out with soap, and sometimes a spanking. I get spankings for other stuff, too.

Mommy usually just uses her hand, but if she’s real mad, sometimes she gets the paddle that hangs on the back of the closet door. And sometimes she uses a hairbrush. Daddy uses his hand, or my hairbrush, and sometimes a ruler if I’m extra naughty.

But I’m not usually so bad. Only sometimes, when I forget to be good. But then after a spanking, Mommy and Daddy always tell me I’m forgiven and how much they love me. I know my Mommy and Daddy love me. They’re so nice, and happy.

Well, they were happy. They haven’t been lately. I’m not sure if they know I know this or not, but they been fighting a awful lot. I hear them when I lay in bed at night. They close their door, thinking I won’t hear them, but I do. Sometimes I even get out of bed, and go closer to them to listen.

I know that’s wrong, but I can’t help it. I used to fall asleep at night listening to the stereo. Mommy would put it on real low, just enough so they could hear it. Then she and Daddy would sit in the living room and talk, or read, or Mommy would sew, and they would have the music in the background. I would lay in bed, listening to the music, and the quiet voices of Mommy and Daddy and fall asleep having wonderful dreams.

Now all I hear is shouting. There’s no music. And instead of falling asleep peacefully, I fall asleep restlessly and have not such good dreams. I’m scared. I’m worried. I don’t know what is happening with my mommy and daddy. I don’t know if it’s my fault. I have no idea what they are fighting about.

~~~~~~~~~~

I come home from school and run into the house. Mommy always has a hug for me and a snack waiting. Today there was nothing. Mommy wasn’t even home. Anita, the older lady that lives across the street was there.

“Hi, Anita,” I say as I come in the door. “What are you doing here? Where’s my mommy?”

“Hello, Allison,” she says. She always calls me by my full name. Not even my teacher does that. My mommy and daddy only call me Allison when I’ve been naughty.

“Your mommy had to work a little late today, and she asked me to come over and look after you until she gets home, or until your daddy gets home.”

“Oh,” is all I can think of to say. This has been happening a lot lately. It’s not always Anita who’s here. Sometimes my babysitter is here, or Daddy is home early. Mommy hasn’t been coming home a lot lately. I been missing her.

Anita makes me a snack and I sit at the kitchen table and get started on my homework. I told you I was a good student. I always like to get my homework done fast, so then I can play afterwards. Besides, I’m only in first grade; I don’t gots that much.

I finish my math page, and write my spelling words three times each. The only other thing I gotta do is read. But Mommy and Daddy will do that with me later. We read a book or two every night. We take turns. I read a page, and they read a page. It’s funner that way. And ya gotta pay attention, so you don’t lose your place.

I put my homework away and take out my leggos. I am making the whole town. I just got a new set for my birthday. I awready made the school and now I’m working on the store. Anita sits on the couch, quietly, and watches me.

After a while, I hear a key in the lock and I jump up and run to the door. It’s Mommy!

“Hi, Mommy,” I say, all excitedly. She had left early for work and I hadn’t seen her that morning. I open my arms for a big hug but she walks right past me. I feel hurt, but then realize she’s carrying a lot of stuff. So I wait for her to put it all down.

After she puts it down, she turns to talk to Anita. I stand there quietly, trying not to feel hurt, that she hasn’t even given me my hug yet. Anita smiles at me and says goodbye. I wave and close the door after her. Then I turn to Mommy.

I try again. “Hi, Mommy,” I say in a quiet voice.

She looks at me and at my toys scattered all over the living room floor. “Allison, you need to clean this stuff up,” she scolds me.

“Why?” I ask. “I’m in the middle of making my town, Mommy,” I explain.

“Well, go make your town in your room. I want this stuff picked up now.”

Her voice is rising, and she looks mad. But I don’t care. I feel hurt that she didn’t even say a proper hello to me and give me my hug. I run out of the room, and into my room. We live in a ranch, so there’s no upstairs. When I get there, I slam my door.

I know that’s against the rules, but I don’t care. I’m hurt. Mommy used to come in and give me a big hug and say, hi princess, or hi baby. But now I get nothing. I’m only six. What could I have possibly done?

I lay on my bed, sobbing. I hear Mommy’s footsteps coming down the hall. There’s no carpeting, so you can hear a lot of stuff. She gets to my door and knocks.

“Allison, it’s Mommy!”

“GO AWAY!” I yell.

She tries the door, but I have locked it. I not aposed to do that either, but I still don’t care. I don’t wanna talk to her.

“Allison, open the door this instant!” Mommy says, raising her voice.

I get off my bed, walk over to the door, and fling it open. “There, it’s open! You happy?” I shout.

Then I look down. I know that’s not the proper voice in which I aposed to talk to my mommy, but she made me mad. She stands there in the doorway, with her hands on her hips and just looks down at me.

“Allison Michelle, don’t you get sassy with me, young lady. What, may I ask, was all that about?” she asks me.

“I don’t gotta tell you nothing. You don’t care about me anyways,” I tell her. Then I turn my back on her and walk over to my bed and lie down again.

She sighs and comes over to me. She sits down on the edge of my bed and looks at me. “Allie?” she says gently.

“What?” I ask. I know I am probably in big trouble now, but I don’t care. I’m not sorry I slammed the door or was sassy to her. She deserved it.

“Look at me, Allison,” she says.

I turn over in my bed and look at Mommy. She looks tired. I start to feel bad about giving her a hard time. I start to cry and apologize.

She takes me into her arms and cuddles me. After a few minutes, she asks, “Now what was all that about? You know better than to slam your door and to talk back to me. You know I won’t tolerate that, Allison.”

I nod while I continue sobbing. “I’m sorry, Mommy. I was just mad at you.”

“Why, princess?” she asks. Princess. That’s Mommy’s pet name for me. I loved when she called me that. Most times I did not feel like a princess at all, but it made me smile when she called me that.

I sniffle and wipe at a tear. I look up at her. “When you came home, you didn’t hug me or even say hi,” I explain sadly.

Mommy nods. “Ohhhh,” she says. “I’m sorry, baby. Mommy had a really bad day at work. But that’s no excuse. You’re right; I should have given you a hug when I first walked in. Mommy made a mistake. Do you forgive me?”

As she says this, she holds me in her arms. I can’t help but forgive her. I feel bad that she had a bad day at work. Sometimes I have bad days, too. Everyone’s entitled, I guess. I nod and tell her she’s forgiven.

She holds me for a long time. I am starting to worry, though, that I will not be forgiven for what I did. I look up at her and wonder if I should ask, or just let it drop. Maybe she’ll tell Daddy and he’ll spank me. I don’t want that to happen. I don’t get to see Daddy much as it is.

“Mommy?” I say in a quiet voice.

“Yes, princess?” she says.

“Never mind,” I tell her. Maybe I’ll just keep quiet...don’t wanna rock the boat, or nothing.

“Tell me, baby, what is it?” she asks.

“Are you mad at me for what I did, Mommy? Are you gonna punish me?”

“Punish you? For what?”

I look up. That was Daddy’s voice. Daddy’s home! And I didn’t even hear him come in. I jump outta Mommy’s lap and run over to him.

“DADDDDDY!” I yell, jumping into his arms.

Good thing he put his briefcase down already and was able to catch me. He swings me around and hugs me tight. Now that’s a warm welcome!

“Hi, angel,” Daddy says. Angel. That’s what he calls me. Sometimes he calls me baby, or little one, or sweetie. But I like angel, best. Makes me feel like I am an angel, ‘cept when I’ve been bad.

“I missed you, Daddy,” I tell him. “And I made you and Mommy a picture at school. Let me go get it,” I say, starting for the door.

But Daddy holds me back. “Hold on, Allie. What’s this about being punished?” Daddy asks me.

I look at Mommy then, and then down at the floor. I have forgotten already about that, and don’t want to bring it up.

“Well...” I start to say. Then the whole story comes tumbling out. Daddy looks mad. No, more upset than mad. I don’t know what else to say. I wait for one of them to say something.

Daddy gives Mommy a funny look and turns to look at me. “Allie, that is kind of a big mess out in the living room. I want you to go clean it up. You can bring all those leggos in here and work on your town. I’m going to go help Mommy start dinner. Then the three of us will talk. Okay?”

Daddy says this in a kind of weird voice. I didn’t know what to do so I just said, “Okay.”

I go to the living room to clean up. I hear Mommy and Daddy go into the kitchen. I can’t hear what they are saying, but I hear a lot of pots and pans being clattered about. I bet they were having another fight. Boy, I was so bad; I hadn’t meant to make them fight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What were you thinking, Kat?” Jeff asked her.

“What?! Why is this my fault?”

“I can’t believe you didn’t hug our daughter when you came home! She didn’t do anything to you!”

“Look, I had a bad day at work. The boss said...”

“I don’t care what the boss said. I don’t care about your bad day. I care about our six-year-old, daughter. You just come in, and rush past her. And then the first thing out of your mouth is yelling at her about some stupid toys. You’re a piece of work, Katherine.”

“Oh, gimme a break! I apologized and she forgave me. Why can’t you?” Kat said, sighing. She turned her back on her husband.

“You know darn well that I...” Jeff began to say.

“STOPPP! Stop fighting! I’m sorry! I won’t be bad ANYMORE!!!” Allie screamed, burst into tears and ran from the room.

Jeff just looked at Kat. Neither of them moved for a minute. Then Jeff ran to Allie’s room.

He tried the door, but it was locked. “Allie, open up, it’s Daddy.”

Silence.

“Sweetie, Daddy can’t help you if you don’t open the door.”

Silence. Jeff was frustrated. He had wanted to remove the lock now that Allie was old enough to use it, but Katherine had said she would want her privacy. He thought it was dangerous.

When Kat appeared at the door, he said to her, “Where’s the key? We have to get in there and talk to her.”

“I don’t know,” Kat said.

“This is all your fault,” Jeff told her.

“Oh, of course it’s my fault; everything’s my fault. I can’t deal with this anymore,” Kat said, turning to run off.

But Jeff grabbed her. “Oh, no, not this time. You’re going to stay and talk to our daughter.”

Jeff knocked on the door again. “Allie, sweetie, open up, please. Mommy and Daddy want to talk to you. You’re not in trouble, I promise.”

~~~~~~~~~

I got up and opened the door. Daddy came in and followed me to my bed. Then Mommy was behind him. They both sat down, and I laid on my bed.

No one said anything for a few minutes. Then I couldn’t deal with the silence anymore and I cried, “I sorry, Daddy. I’ll be good. Please don’t fight no more.”

I watched as Daddy looked at Mommy. Then he turned to me and said, “Allie, Mommy and I were not fighting because of you.”

“Yes, you was,” I said. “I heard you. I always hear you,” I admitted.

Daddy looked upset then. I didn’t mean to upset him. Maybe I shouldn’t a told him that.

I bit my lip and looked down. “Sorry,” I said again.

Daddy lifted my chin so that I was looking right at him. “Allie, Mommy and Daddy are not angry or upset with you. You are not in trouble. And I’m sorry if our fighting is upsetting you. Okay?”

I nodded. I didn’t know exactly what he meant, but I nodded anyway.

Daddy went on to explain that sometimes parents fight and sometimes people have bad days. We also talked about my sassiness and the door slamming, and for once I wasn’t in trouble for it.

Things were okay.

~~~~~~

For a bit. Then they got bad again.

Mommy was coming home later and later every day. Daddy was coming home earlier. I didn’t hear any more fighting. Then again I didn’t hear any talking, neither. I think Mommy and Daddy were mad at each other. I didn’t know what I had done. I had been trying to be very good.

I remembered what Daddy had said about them not being mad at me, but I couldn’t help but think it was something I did.

Weekends had always been special family times. Me, Mommy, and Daddy would go somewhere special, or we’d spend the day together doing something outside. Sometimes we’d all just be in the yard. Mommy working in the garden, Daddy working on a project, me throwing the ball to Luke.

But lately, it was just me and Daddy. Daddy said Mommy had business to do. She even stayed overnight once. I was missing her.

One Saturday night, I was lying on my bed playing with some toys when Daddy came in. Mommy was gone AGAIN.

“You ready for your bath, sweetie?” Daddy asked.

“With bubbles?” I asked.

Daddy smiled and said, “Of course.”

I got ready and followed him into the bathroom. I stepped in; it was nice and warm. I played with the bubbles a little and Daddy put my dolls in, too.

While I played, he took the washcloth and washed me. I could do it myself, but I liked when Mommy or Daddy did it. Mommy always made it a game or tickled me. We always laughed at bathtime. Daddy just did it real carefully, and quickly so I wouldn’t catch cold.

“Daddy?”

“Yes, angel?”

“Where’s Mommy?”

“She had to go out of town on business, again, sweetie.”

“Oh. She been doing that a lot lately.”

“Yes, she has,” Daddy said. He handed me the washcloth so I could cover my eyes while he shampooed my hair. I hated when the shampoo dripped down into them when he rinsed.

“How come?” I asked, when he was done.

“How come, what?” Daddy said.

“How come she been going away a lot? Is it cause I been bad?” I asked.

Daddy pulled the plug in the drain and helped me stand up. He wrapped the big Lion King bath towel around me and started to dry me off. Then he took my hand and led me into my bedroom.

“Get panties, and pick out your pajamas. Then we will talk,” Daddy said gently.

It wasn’t a kind of talk you get after you are bad, so I wasn’t worried. I picked out my favorite Winnie the Pooh pajamas and a pair of panties and went back over to Daddy. He helped me change. Then he sat in the rocker and pulled me into his lap.

I cuddled up to him and waited for him to answer my question.

“Allie? You are not bad. You are my good girl.”

“But sometimes, I’m bad. And then you and Mommy fighted. I know it’s cuz of me, even if you sayed it’s not, Daddy.”

Daddy turned me around in the rocker so I was looking in his eyes. “Allie, Mommy and I never fight because of you, understand? And you are a good little girl. Sometimes, not very often, but there are times when you make bad choices and act in a naughty way, but you are a good girl. Do you understand that?”

“Yes, Daddy. But why’s Mommy gone so much? I miss her,” I said.

“I know you do, sweetie. I miss her, too,” Daddy said.

Then Mommy was home again. Things were okay for a while. She said that she and Daddy had a long talk and we were gonna be just fine.

Mommy and I were planning Halloween, even though it wasn’t for a while yet. She LOVED Winnie the Pooh, and had bought a costume for herself. She was making mine, though. It was a Tigger costume. She was sewing it herself. I thought it was great.

We tried to convince Daddy to be Eeyore but he said, “No way.”

But as Halloween got closer, Mommy was gone a lot again. I was missing her so much. Every night I went to check on the progress of my costume, but it still didn’t look like no tiger. I was getting worried it wouldn’t be ready in time.

Late that night as I lay in bed, I could hear Mommy and Daddy’s voices. They was arguing again. I sighed and tried to sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“You said you would have it done on time. She’s counting on you, Kat,” Jeff said, trying to keep his voice down.

“Well, I’m sorry. We’ll just have to buy her a costume. I can’t work on it,” Kat said, coughing.

Jeff stared at her. “Have you gone to the doctor yet? You keep coughing, and telling me and everyone else how sick you are all the time, but you do nothing about it.”

“I’m fine. Let’s stick to one thing at a time, shall we? Are you going to buy her a new costume?” Katherine asked. She was becoming very weary of telling her husband anything anymore.

Jeff stared daggers at her. “I’ll do it. But YOU have to tell her you can’t finish the Tigger costume. And YOU have to tell her that you’re NOT taking her trick or treating, cuz you have something else to do. I don’t want to deal with it. I’M the one who has to deal with the aftermath of everything else you dish out. That poor kid. She’s only six years old for crying out loud!”

“You know what? I’m sick of this! I don’t have to put up with this anymore,” Kat shouted.

“Lower your voice; you’ll wake her,” Jeff insisted.

“I don’t care; let her hear. You baby her too much, anyway. She can’t do anything herself.”

Jeff put his head in his hands and sat back on the bed they shared. “There was a time when you enjoyed babying her with me. I guess those times are gone.”

Kat didn’t answer.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mommy was gone all the time now. Daddy said she was sick and was staying with a friend til she got better. I didn’t believe him. I not sure where she really was, but I didn’t think she would leave to be sick somewheres else. She been sick before and never leaved.

I went down to the living room one night where Daddy was reading the paper. I walked over to him and was holding my hands behind my back.

Daddy looked up. “Whatcha got, Allie?” he asked.

I pulled the bar of soap from behind my back and showed it to Daddy. He raised his eyebrows.

“What’s that for, sweetie?” he asked.

“Daddy? Where’s Mommy? She not coming back, is she?” I cried, dropping the soap.

I had brought it out to prove to Daddy that I knew he was lying to me. I hoped I was wrong. I thought maybe what he told me was true, and then I would feel a little silly. But I guess deep in my heart I knew she wasn’t coming back.

“Oh, little one!” Daddy said, scooping me up. He cradled me into his arms and rubbed my back as I cried.

“She’s not, is she, Daddy?”

“No, Allie, she’s not. I’m sorry I lied to you. You’re right; I should have my mouth washed out with soap. I just wanted to keep from hurting you.”

“You didn’t hurt me, Daddy. Mommy did. How come she leaved?” I asked.

“I don’t know, baby girl, I really don’t know,” Daddy said sighing.

Daddy tried to explain things to me several times after that night. Daddy said that Mommy wanted to do other things, see other people, and go other places. I couldn’t understand why she couldn’t do those things and still live here with us, but Daddy said she just couldn’t.

I was sad. I missed my mommy. Every night, I slept with the Tigger costume...the one she never finished. I slept with the two teddy bears Mommy had gived me for my birthday. I tried to sleep in my Pooh pjs every night, but Daddy said they had to be washed sometimes.

I thought about my mommy all the time. I thought about how she would make me a hot dog for dinner and let me put the ketchup on by myself. I thought about when she gived me my baths. She tickled me as she washed each part of my body. I thought about when she would undress me and dress me...arms up, sit down, etc. She made everything fun.

I missed her. Don’t get me wrong; I loved my Daddy. But it just wasn’t the same.

Daddy tried to come home early and spend lots of extra time with me. I tried to be extra good so he wouldn’t have to punish me. But most of all, I behaved so he wouldn’t leave. I was sure that’s why my mommy had finally left. I had been trying to be so good, but the day before she left, I had been naughty. I got a spanking that night and the next day she was gone.

I was explaining all this one night to my teddy bears. Daddy musta overheard me cuz he came in and said, “Allie? Can we talk?”

I put the bears down and looked at him. “Sure, Daddy.”

“I heard what you were telling your bears, sweetie. Mommy DID NOT leave because you were naughty. I want you to remember that.”

“But Daddy, that has to be it. Mommy used to love me. I was good then. But when I was bad, she left,” I explained.

“No, sweetheart. That’s not it. And we have talked about this before; you are not “bad”. Sometimes you may do some naughty things, but it’s the behavior that’s naughty: not you.”

“Okay, Daddy, but Mommy leaved right after I did a naughty thing. So it must be my fault. How come she don’t love me no more?”

“She does still love you, Allie. She just forgot how to show it,” Daddy tried.

I still didn’t understand. But I wasn’t sure if I was upset still. Now I was feeling kind of mad.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeff didn’t know how to explain to Allie that her mommy was selfish. That she wanted to do things that did not involve a six-year-old. He didn’t know how to tell his little girl that her mother wanted to do things her way and not care about what happened in the real world.

He talked it over with his older brother, Paul. Paul lived close by with his teen-aged daughter, Jackie.

“Pauly, I don’t know what to do. Her poor little heart is broken,” Jeff explained.

Paul put his arms around his younger brother. “I know how you feel. When Sarah died, and Jackie was so young, I didn’t think I could go on. But I had to hold it together for Jackie. That’s what you need to do.”

“But Katherine’s not dead. Although I feel like killing her. I can’t believe she could be so selfish and immature. She’s not the person I married almost ten years ago,” Jeff said, sighing.

“You need to get out of the house. Why don’t you take a drive? Jackie and I will stay with Allie,” Paul suggested.

“Thanks, Pauly. I could use a few hours away. Let me just say good-bye to Allie. I don’t want her to think I just up and left her. I want to assure her I’m coming back.”

“Okay, bro. Go do what you have to do. Allie will be fine. Jackie and I will take good care of her. We’ll order a pizza for dinner and maybe rent a movie.”

“Well, she’s been so fragile lately. She even started wetting the bed again,” Jeff admitted. “She’s afraid to misbehave because she thinks that’s why her mommy left.”

“Go,” Paul said. “She’ll be okay without you for a few hours.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What’cha doing, Allie?” Jackie asked.

I looked up. My older cousin, Jackie, was standing in my room. “Oh, uh, I was just cleaning,” I lied.

Jackie went over to the bag and picked out the top item. It was my Pooh pajamas. “Whatcha doing with these? Throwing them out?” she asked, amazed.

“Yeah, um, they don’t fit no more,” I lied again. I was getting pretty good at lying.

She continued taking things out of the bag: My Pooh pajamas, my two teddies, the tigger costume, a book with “Princess” written across the top, and some other assorted items.

“Allie? Where’d you get these?” Jackie asked, surprised. She was holding up matches.

I gasped. I didn’t think there’d be any harm in her looking through the bag, but I forgot I had stuck those in there at the last minute.

Jackie was staring at me. I looked down. “Umm, what are those?” I said, hoping Jackie wouldn’t know I was lying.

It was at that unfortunate time that Uncle Pauly decided to appear in my doorway. “Jacklyn Rose! What are you doing with matches, young lady?” he roared.

Jackie jumped two feet, dropping the matches. She turned to look at her daddy. I bit my lip. I didn’t know if she would tattle on me or not.

“Ummm, I, uh,” she stammered.

Uncle Pauly stood there in the doorway with his hands on his hips, waiting. “Well?” he asked.

She looked at me and then at her daddy. “I just found them, sir,” she said.

“Found them? Where?”

“They’re mine, Uncle,” I said, quietly.

Uncle Pauly sighed and came into the room then. He sat on my bed and motioned me over to him. He stood me in front of him and asked me very calmly, “Allison Michelle, what on earth are you doing with matches, young lady?”

“I, uh, I,” I stopped; I couldn’t even think of a good lie. I decided to go with the truth. “I taked them, Uncle, from one of Daddy’s coat pockets.”

“I see. And what were you going to do with them, Allison?” Uncle Pauly asked.

I pointed to the bag of stuff. “I was gonna burn all that stuff. All the stuff from my mommy,” I explained.

Jackie gasped. I forgot she was in the room. “You can’t use matches, Allie. You are just little. You could get hurt.”

“I know,” I said, “but I don’t care. I just wanted to get rid of everything from my mommy. She leaved me; she don’t care ‘bout me no more.”

“That’s not true, Allison. Your mommy loves you very much.”

“No she doesn’t!” I shouted.

Uncle Pauly stared at me. Then he sighed. “I can’t talk to you when you are like this, Allison. Go stand in the corner until you are ready to speak nicely to me,” he said, pointing.

“Dadddddy!” Jackie said, stretching it out. “How could you send her to the corner? She’s hurting!”

“Jacklyn, that’s enough from you, unless you want to join her,” Uncle said.

I ran quickly to the corner. I knew I was in big trouble. I hadn’t had a spanking since the day before Mommy left. Sure I had been a bit naughty every now and then, but Daddy seemed afraid to punish me. Now I didn’t think I would be able to avoid it.

Jackie stood quietly; she knew better than to argue with her daddy. I faced the corner: tears silently cascading down my face. After what seemed like forever, I turned around. Jackie was sitting on the floor, looking through the bag. Uncle Pauly was sitting in my rocker.

“Uncle?”

“Yes, Allison?”

“I’m ready to talk to you,” I paused, then added, “nicely.”

He beckoned me over to join him. I climbed up into his lap. “Uncle Pauly?”

“Yes?”

“Is it okay to hate someone?”

He didn’t answer for a long time. “Well, not usually, Allie. It’s not nice to hate people. Why?”

“Cuz I hate my mommy,” I admitted.

“Ohhhh,” Uncle said, hugging me close to him. “I’m sorry, sweetie, that your mommy went away. But I know for a fact that she loves you very much.”

“No, she don’t. If she loved me, she’d be here. She’d have finished my Tigger costume and would be here for Halloween. It’s next week, and she’s not around. She don’t love me or she’d be here at night to give me my bath and tuck me in and read to me. But she’s not! And I don’t care if it’s bad, but I HATE her. And I’m really very, very angry with her!” I shouted.

I jumped down then and ran back to the corner. “I guess I not able to talk nicely yet; I sorrrry!” I cried, sinking down into the corner.

Jackie looked at her daddy and then ran over and put her arms around me. “Oh, Allie, it’s okay. It’s going to be all right.” She turned to look at her father. “Tell her, Daddy. Tell her it’s going to be okay,” she cried.

Uncle Pauly sighed. Then he got up and came over to us. He picked me up and carried me back over to the rocker. He just held me tight while I cried. I really was so mad at my mommy. She had just left; never had even said good-bye.

We did get pizza that night for dinner. Daddy came home while we were watching the Dalmatian movie. I jumped up and ran to him and gave him the biggest hug.

“You came back!” I said.

“Yes, princess, I told you I would!” Daddy said, smiling.

But I did not smile back. I put my face into a big frown and just yelled, “NO! NOT PRINCESS!” I turned and ran from the living room, into my room, and slammed the door.

~~~~~~~~

Paul looked at his brother. Jeff sighed. “I forgot; Princess was Kat’s special name for Allie.”

“Oh,” Paul said. He turned to Jackie then and said, “Why don’t you go help Allie get ready for bed? I need to talk to Uncle Jeff.”

“Okay, Daddy,” Jackie said, getting up from the couch. She gave her dad and her uncle quick hugs and left the room.

The two men sat down. “There’s something you should know, Jeff,” Paul began.

“Uh-oh, that doesn’t sound so good. Did something happen while I was out?”

Paul nodded and told his brother about the bag and the matches. Jeff couldn’t believe it. He did remind himself he would have to be more careful about grabbing matches from restaurants from then on, though.

“I didn’t punish her, Jeff. She seemed so fragile, like you said. I didn’t know how you wanted to handle it.”

“I haven’t punished her since Katherine left. I know that’s wrong. But she thinks that that’s why her mommy left.”

Paul looked at Jeff and said, “I think you need to prove to her that she can still misbehave, get punished, and you will still be here when it’s over and forgiven. Otherwise she will get away with murder, bro.”

“I know you’re right, Pauly,” Jeff said, sighing again. “Okay, thanks. And thank you for being here for her tonight. It felt good to get out for a bit.” He smiled.

Paul smiled back. “Anytime. You know that. I’m just a phone call away.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I hugged Jackie and thanked her for helping me get ready for bed. I wasn’t mad anymore. I gave Uncle Pauly a hug and a kiss and said goodbye to him and Jackie. Daddy carried me back to my room. He sat in the rocker and held me for a long while.

“Daddy?”

“Yes, Allie?”

“I’m sorry I shouted at you,” I said quietly.

“Well, Allie, you know I don’t like that,” Daddy said.

“Yes, sir.” I nodded.

”But I do understand why you did it. I won’t call you Princess anymore if you don’t want me to.”

I shook my head. “I don’t. That was Mommy’s name for me. I never felt like a princess anyway, so I don’t know why she called me that. But when I hear it, it makes me feel sad.”

“Is that why you wanted to get rid of those other things that Mommy gave you? Because they remind you of her?”

“Yes, Daddy. It hurts too much to look at them. I hate Mommy. And I hate her for leaving me!” I cried.

“I know you’re upset and mad at Mommy, sweetie. But please don’t hate her. Hate is such a strong word. I don’t want you using it to describe anyone, especially your mommy. One of these days she will realize how much she loves you and will come back. I’m sure of it.”

“I don’t think so, Daddy.”

“Well, I do. But until then, if you don’t want the things she gave you, we can put them away. All right?”

“I guess,” I said.

“Okay,” Daddy said. “I will find a big box and you can put all the things in there that you don’t want to look at right now. We can put it in the attic, and when you feel like taking it out, you’ll let me know, and I’ll get it down. Does that sound like a good plan?”

I nodded. It actually did. If I had burned those items, and then changed my mind, I would never be able to look at them again.

“Daddy? Are you mad that I had those matches?” I asked, quietly.

“Well, sweetie, I was not happy to hear that. You know that matches are extremely dangerous, don’t you?”

“Yes, sir. We learned about them in health class at school. They are very bad,” I admitted.

“Then you know it was wrong of you to have them?”

“Yes.”

No one said anything for a while. I was surprised that Daddy hadn’t spanked me. I was feeling real guilty. I looked up at him and wondered. He didn’t do or say anything.

I got off his lap and stood in front of him. “Daddy?”

“Yes, Allie?”

“Playing with matches is a very naughty thing to do, isn’t it?”

“Yes, it is.”

“Are you gonna give me a spanking?”

Daddy looked down at me. He smiled slightly. “Well, do you think you deserve one?”

I didn’t know how to answer that. Sure, I deserved one, but did I really want one? No.

“I don’t wanna get a spanking. They hurt.”

“That’s not what I asked, Allison. I asked if you deserved one. I know they hurt; they’re supposed to. That’s how they teach you a lesson,” Daddy explained.

Nothing happened. Daddy didn’t say anything more. He just looked at me and waited. It was too quiet. I knew he was waiting for me to answer his question.

“Daddy? Will you still love me after you spank me?”

“Oh, Allie, I will ALWAYS love you. You are my very special little girl.”

I smiled. Then I frowned. I looked up at Daddy and very quietly said, “I deserve one, Daddy.”

Daddy stood up then and walked over to my bed. He sat down, took my hand and stood me in front of him. He looked down at me and said, “Allison Michelle, tell me why I am about to spank you.”

“Cuz I taked those matches outta your pocket and I was gonna burn stuff wif em,” I cried.

“Yes,” Daddy said. He then pulled my pajama bottoms and my panties down and pulled me over his lap. He raised his hand and brought it down on my bottom over and over again.

{Smack! Smack!} “You will not play with matches, EVER, young lady. {Smack! Smack!} They are very {Smack! Smack!} dangerous and you know that. {Smack! Smack!} You could have hurt yourself {Smack! Smack!} or started a very big fire. {Smack! Smack!} And you definitely {Smack! Smack!} know better {Smack! Smack!} than to take things {Smack! Smack!} that do not belong to you. {Smack! Smack!} Especially things that you know to be dangerous. {Smack! Smack!} I hope {Smack! Smack!} I won’t have to discuss {Smack! Smack!} this with you again.” {Smack! Smack!}

The whole time Daddy was spanking me, I was kicking my feet and crying. I tried hard to listen to the lecture part, but it was hard. The tears were flowing down my face, and my bottom was on fire. I was so sure that Daddy would hate me forever after this.

But he didn’t. When it was all over, he stood me up and held me tight to him. He told me he loved me, and forgave me, over and over again, as many times as I needed to hear it. I felt better, too. I didn’t feel guilty anymore.

“Daddy? I love you,” I said, putting my arms around his neck and squeezing tight.

“I love you, too, Allie. You’re my angel, my sweetie, my little one, my good girl.”

But not his princess...and that was fine with me.

“Daddy, you’re never gonna leave me, are you?”

“Nope. You just try to get rid of me,” he answered.

Then he tickled me and I giggled. Everything was fine again. Well, not perfect, but okay. Mommy was gone. I probably would never see her again. It would take some time to get used to. But I had my Daddy, and that was the best thing ever.

The end.