Girls

There are actually quite a few that I did not mention in this chapter, but I only wrote the ones who I think have impacted me the most throughout the course of my life.   I was never good with dating girls, even making friends with girls for that matter.  I probably have better luck making friends with guys (no I am not gay) than doing anything with girls.  However I really need to thank every single girl that I had feelings on throughout these years; I am thankful to be able to learn so much through every encounter and it somehow made me look and do things differently after each experience.  Perhaps I may seem to be quite a flower-hearted person, but when I actually have a crush on someone, she would be the only person that I have feelings towards and I'll do everything out of my disposal to make her happy (well, if I actually have the chance a guess, though honestly most of the time I don't lol.) 

Throughout all these different experience, good or bad, I finally understand one thing: Your life can never be perfect without a good relationship, but in the same time you can be able to achieve 99.999999% of life without it.  So I guess that made me refocus on life and not pay too much attention to love and romance ever since I understand this truth.  Unfortunately, I just couldn't manage to obtain that 99.99999% anyway, oh well.

Cindy Tsai

To be honest, I really know nothing about Cindy. It is probably the only time that I really was under the effect of love at first sight. I still remember how I was in grade 5 and I first saw Cindy walking pass the hallway and I was totally stunned by her appearance (that's quite a weird choice of words but anyhow). At that time she was definitely the the cutest looking girl that I've ever seen and I just ended up 暗戀 her without even knowing her at all (in fact I didn't even knew that she was Taiwanese haha). I still remember how I would actually stand in the the hallway and stare at the classroom door just to see her walk out in between classes lol.

Eventually when I went to high school I actually get a chance to get to know a little more about her when we were both in the badminton team. Now that I looked back at it it was actually quite awkward how I would bother Leslie and Davie for help and advice on what to do. And of course nothing happened at all during the whole time, and eventually she dates someone else. Actually I don't think I was too down about it at that time; maybe I already expected it long ahead, or maybe she just wasn't as perfect as I used to perceive her to be over time. But one thing is for sure, I really learned a lot throughout the process.

Candy Kong

The process of having a crush on Candy was actually quite weird. It all started when Terry and Stephanie started dating and then they were suggesting that Candy was a very good girl and that I should try to court her. I think I just gradually had feelings for her and gradually convinced myself that I had a crush on her. Candy was actually the first girl that I actually put an effort into courtship and to impress. In doing so I gave her love letters and DIY gifts and ask her for dances. What surprised me though, was the fact that she didn't reject my offers, although she never actually gave feedback to any of them lol. Maybe she is being nice and don't want to hurt my feelings haha. I guess that the most awkward thing that happened was the time when Terry Mak advise me to 表白 and hold Candy's hand. Now that I reflect back at it I feel quite bad for doing it and she didn't get a chance to refuse due to peer pressure (And no, she never accepted and that was what made thing so awkward. As far as I was told she actually became pretty unhappy about it too). It was actually quite 尷尬 afterwards and I forgot how weird things became ever since that incident. I really can't recall why, but eventually I just gave up and things just went back to normal.

I would like to thank Candy though, for giving me such a memorable experience. It was a very valuable learning experience for me.

Jennifer Lai

Ah yan was my dream lover throughout high school. She was just so cute that I just can't find the word to express her cuteness. But she was just a dream lover to me, so she's someone who is unattainable and can only be watched from afar. Maybe I didn't have a very good experience when I tried to chase Candy; I was actually much more conservative when I tried to chase (did it even consider chase? it really doubt it honestly lol) Jennifer. Well at the very least I always tried to talk to her on ICQ, although I was really bad at it and could never really bring up any conversation other than arguing with her that she's 靚女 (yeh I find that pretty stupid now too) I would try to find out what cartoon character she liked and get a product of that character for her. I still remember how I actually bought her a Tarepanda clock for her birthday; that was probably one of teh stupidest thing that I've ever done (送鐘...get it?).

I remember I ended up going up to her and be blunt enough to ask if she could be my gf. I still really don't understand how I had the courage to do it and why I did that, certainly mind boggling. And obviously she turned me down, absolutely no surprises there lol. I think since then I truly understand the concept of dream lover, and just be thankful that I could see her at school everyday and able to talk to her on ICQ.

A few years ago I found out that she finally got a boyfriend (I am always so slow in getting info haha). Of course I was quite sad for a moment since the unattainable was attained, but in the same time I actually felt happy for her that she finally found someone worthy for her love.

Olivia Sit

Looking back at it, I really understand what Olivia meant when she asked why I liked her. To be honest, she really didn't have anything that stood out which made her very attractive (no offense lol). In fact, I never really thought that I'd have a crush on someone who is much older than I am. Possibly what made the difference is the timing of events. It just happened that we were taking the same culinary class and we have the chances to chat and get to know each other. But this whole thing ended up becoming so confusing and chaotic (well maybe it was I who ended up making it so chaotic and confusing). At times things became so 曖昧 that I was pretty confused myself too and it ultimately became unhealthy for all 3 of us. I know how Olivia's past had made her so defensive that she became too skeptical at things and eventually it made her very depressed. Well, not that I think about it, I guess I had been paying too much attention to her and caring her too much, and it got to a point where it became annoyance and it added up to her. Maybe things never worked out, but I think it was different a good lesson and I never regret going through all this.