1. Man in the cloth's shop: Can I try the blue suit in the window?

  Manager: No, sir, you'll have to use the changing room like everyone else.

2. Customer: How long will my pizza be? 

   Waiter: We don't do have long ones, sir. Only round.

3. What do you get if a herd of elephants trample Batman and Robbin?

    Flatman and Ribbon 

4.  What did the young porcupine say to the cactus?

     "Is that you Daddy?"

5. What did the envelope say to the stamp?

    "Stick with me, baby, and we'll go places."

6.  Why is a naughty boy like the letter D?

      Both make Ma maD.

7. What do you do if you see a skeleton running across a busy road?

    Jump out of your skin and join him.

8.  There once was an old man of Waling, Who had an expectorant feeling. But a sign on the door, said  DON'T SPIT ON THE FLOOR, so he looked up and spat on the celling. 

9. Ahmed : Sir, would you punish me for something I didn't do?

   Teacher : Of course not, why?

    Ahmed : Because I didn't do my homework.

10.  "Grandma, what is a weapon?"

      "A weapon is something you fight with."

      "You mean like Granddad?"