Disclaimer: I don't own Gensomaden Saiyuki, which rightfully belongs to Minekura Kazuya.
Rating: NC-17
Pairings: Sanzo/Goku, hinted Gojyo/Hakkai
Warnings: language, eventual shounen ai/yaoi, some violence, mild lemon
Notes: At least! The smut! ^^;
I had originally intended for Seiten Taisei to show up here, but Goku didn’t feel like working with me. *snort* But I promise he’ll make his appearance in the next chapter—which I’ll try to get up, despite this coming week being exam week.
If I’m grounded shortly after finishing this fic, it’s because of bad grades. *is dying in Algebra II and likely English* So do not be alarmed if I disappear! ^^; I’ll try not to, though.
Halloween is coming up soon. I’m gonna be Seiten Taisei. XD What about you people?
Constructive criticism and feedback always appreciated.
** indicates italics

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The Becoming by D-chan
Part 4

"Hakkai... you hurt or something?"

Hakkai slowly turned, his face half-revealed in the poor lighting. He stared long and hard at Gojyo, staring as though he didn't recall who he was. Shadows danced across his face, showing a glint of sharp teeth, a glimmer of something sinister. Slowly understanding seeped into his eyes.

That was when he struck. Gojyo had the barest of warnings, just Hakkai's right arm moving slightly backward, before he brought it up and violently out, trying to rip Gojyo's heart out. Gojyo fell back, his shirt torn but enduring no more pain than a few shallow scratches. He swore violently.

Goku's eyes widened. "Hakkai!" This hadn't happened the last time; Hakkai had simply crushed the last of the demon into dust, slipping his limiters back on as soon as he was done. It had taken a bit of a toll on him, but other than that he had been perfectly fine.

Sanzo said nothing.

Gojyo used his stumble to his advantage; he fell back, pausing in a crouched position before he darted up, catching Hakkai's wrists before the demon could do anything else. "Hakkai!" he growled. "Calm down! It's me! Just me!" Hakkai struggled. Gojyo shook him roughly. "Hakkai, get a hold of yourself!"

Realization struck. Hakkai froze, mute, his green eyes wide and catlike, reflecting the moonlight. His gaze lost its bloodlust. He stared at Gojyo in something akin to horror.

"Goku, grab the limiters."

The soft order came from Sanzo. Scrambling to do as told, Goku quickly located the silver pieces in the dirt, scooping them up and fairly thrusting them into Gojyo's outstretched hand. Obviously not trusting Hakkai to do it himself, Gojyo was the one to slip the limiters back into place.

As the first one was clipped back on, the pointed ears seemed to collapse, then melt back into a more round, acceptable shape. After the second the leafy patterns disintegrated, as though they were dust patterns sinking into the man's skin. With the last one the fangs shrank and the veins in Hakkai's taut arms became less prominent.

At last, Gojyo breathed a sigh of relief and released the brunette. "You idiot. What was that for?"

It was rare to see Hakkai struggling to smile; the sight set alarms off in Gojyo's head. "Sorry. I suppose I got a bit... carried away." He paused. "I'm sorry..." His eyes slid shut, as though he were about to recall a peaceful memory, before he pitched forward with a small sigh.

"Hakkai!" Goku started forward, but it was Gojyo that caught him before he hit the ground. With the nearby kitchen windows on, it was easy to spot the blood that soaked Hakkai's shirt and now Gojyo's arm. The half-breed paled, but managed to remain mostly calm. Pressing his lips tight together, he stood, supporting Hakkai, and took him back to the inn. People peered out of their windows, curious to see what as happening but far too scared to actually come out. He glared at anyone that stared, and they flinched.

Goku stared after the retreating two, looking at a loss. When it was clear nothing more was about to happen, lights flickered off one by one and people went to bed.

At last, he managed to say, "What just happened?"

Ignoring the rhetorical question, Sanzo lit a cigarette.

If emotions were akin to water then Hakkai wasn't just sensing ripples of anger; it crashed into him like a wave to the beach. The moment Gojyo noticed his companion had awaken, he began to talk.

"Real great, what you did back there."

Hakkai closed his eyes. His patience was rapidly wearing thin in the past couple of days, and he knew Gojyo knew he was pushing it. Perhaps, as with Goku to Sanzo, Gojyo was the only one allowed to test Hakkai's limits so much.

"Yes," he said calmly, eyes still closed. "I think so, too."

"I can't believe you lost it."

"There's a first time for everything."

"Damn it, Hakkai!" The curse was followed by an explosion of sound that seemed to make the room shudder; even without looking Hakkai could tell Gojyo had taken his frustration out on the wall. "You should have stopped the second you realized what was happening!"

At last, Hakkai frowned. "But I didn't." The admission was almost painful, but it did have the pleasing effect of startling the redhead into temporary silence. "I didn't realize I was losing it until you brought me back." Green eyes slid open, accompanied with a tired smile. "I should thank you for that."

Gojyo finally got his jaw to work. "Yeah," he agreed. "You should."

Neither said anything.

"What did the villagers say?" Hakkai finally asked.

Gojyo shrugged. "Those that saw you think they're delusional because you're such a nice person." Hakkai's lips twitched into the beginnings of a wry smile. "Some are convinced we're working with the demon."

"Of course. We've been plotting this town's demise for years now."

"Not like anyone would miss this shithole anyway," Gojyo muttered, propping his chin with his hand.

Slowly, almost dreamily, Hakkai brought his hand up. He stared as though entranced, eyes lingering on his lifeline. Ever since Gojyo had mentioned the man's short lifeline, Hakkai was prone to stare at it when he thought others weren't watching. It was a bit disheartening. Gojyo closed his eyes briefly, sighed, then opened them again.

"Now what?"

The question, surprisingly, had come from Hakkai. Gojyo paused with his mouth half open, snapping it shut quickly. He had been about to ask the same thing, but it seemed as though Hakkai was at a loss, too. He shrugged.

Lowering his hand, Hakkai pushed himself into a sitting position. He gasped, wincing as pain stabbed through his gut. Off-handedly, Gojyo said, "By the way, you might want to lie still. The bastard nearly tore you a new one there."

A grim smile touched Hakkai's lips. "I see." he cautiously lowered himself. "Slashed in the same general area twice. That can't be too lucky."

"Nope. But at least you didn't spill any guts this time."

"Where's Goku?"

The question was completely off topic, but Gojyo was starting to get used to the random changes. He answered without hesitation. "Probably downstairs. Master Sanzo's been in a *real* touchy mood all day."

"Unfortunate," Hakkai murmured.

Gojyo stood. "I'll get some coffee. Feel up to any?"

A glimmer of a real smile shone through the next one Hakkai gave. "Please." Nodding, the half-breed turned to go, only to be stopped in the doorway as the quietest of whispers carried through the air.

"Thank you."

He tapped the frame for a moment, quickly searching for the best response, before he decided that it was all right to use a typical one. He didn't have to look to know that Hakkai was watching him. Calmly, arrogantly, he said, "About damn time you thanked me."

With that he left the room, Hakkai's amused chuckles ricocheting in his head.

Dinner was another tense affair. No one mentioned the previous night's incident, though it was clearly riding everyone's mind. Goku and Gojyo made an effort to fight, but even Goku wasn't too eager to engage in it. For the most part, dinner was eaten in silence-- and it disturbed everyone.

In the end, Hakkai had felt well enough to come down and eat. He had made an attempt to heal his own injuries, but for some reason he never had been too skillful when it came to healing himself. He moved a bit gingerly but otherwise appeared to be perfectly fine. A random onlooker would never have guessed he'd nearly been gutted the night before.

Sanzo, as usual, finished first. Normally at this point he would sit back and read the paper, but this time he just stared moodily at the wall, eyebrows drawn down. Goku glanced at him frequently but made no move to mention his keeper's behavior.

Not a word was exchanged, but all four filed into Hakkai's room afterward. Hakkai slid onto the bed; Gojyo grabbed the nearest chair and pulled it closer to the bedside; Sanzo seemed fine leaning against the wall; Goku sat cross-legged on the floor, petting Hakuryuu and feeding the dragon leftovers he had slipped from the table.

Hakkai, ever the icebreaker, said calmly, "The way I see it, we have two choices."

"Please," Sanzo said heavily. "Enlighten us."

"We could take a few days to devise a good trap of sorts," Hakkai answered. "I don't think even our good luck will hold out very long if we try that approach, though."

"Good luck, he says," Gojyo muttered.

"And the other?" Sanzo asked with the air of someone who already knew the answer.

Hakkai shrugged. "We leave the village and let them handle the problem themselves."

One would expect a thick silence to follow, but Goku spoke to quickly to let it settle. "No."

Sanzo scowled. "Just for that, I think we should."

"We can't just leave them to their own defenses," Goku argued. Hakuryuu squealed in protest when he unconsciously dug his fingers into the dragon's spine. Startled, Goku quickly released him and the white dragon scuttled toward Hakkai, shooting the boy a look of contempt. Goku sulked.

Running his fingers down the bristly spine, Hakkai soothed his pet. "I'm afraid I'm inclined to agree with Goku."

"Then you two'd better help us think of something fast," Gojyo drawled. "Because it looks like we're fast running out of options."

"Well, he's gotta have a weakness of *some* sort, right?" Goku persisted, resting his elbows on his knees as she leaned forward. "So we just gotta find it and... um..."

"Exploit it," Hakkai said gently.

"Yeah."

"We already know its weakness," Sanzo said shortly. "Light. It runs away every time light threatens it."

"So why not fight it and let Hakkai light up or something?"

Gojyo chortled; Hakkai bit back a chuckle, settling for a patient smile. "My Qi Gong techniques aren't as much light as they are the gathering of life energies, Goku."

The boy sighed, letting his head fall forward. He seemed to be muttering something, but no one quite caught it. Staring at the floor, Goku traced senseless patterns into the wood. He wanted to help, wanted to save these people, wanted to do something to get rid of this village. While it was small and likely insignificant in the larger picture of the world, it still held living, breathing people that wanted to keep breathing just as much as anyone else. That made writing the place off as unimportant seem very unfair to Goku. What did size have to do with anything?

His fingers knotted in his hair, a soft exhale of frustration passing his lips. Still nothing was said. They were running out of options ridiculously fast. It wasn't natural for one random demon to cause them this much mischief; it wasn't right, somehow. Didn't all the toughest adversaries lay ahead?

Sanzo pushed away from the wall, drawing attention. He didn't give any excuse for his sudden departure, except when Hakkai called after him, "Are we finished already?"

"You keep thinking," Sanzo said flatly. "I'm going to buy more cigarettes."

He shut the door quietly behind him, his footsteps gradually fading until it was certain he was out of hearing range. Even then, Hakkai waited a good couple of minutes before he spoke. "I do have one other idea."

Gojyo's head snapped up. "What? Why didn't you say anything?" he demanded. "Now we'll have to explain it to the monk when he gets back--"

"No," Hakkai cut in sharply. He softened his voice. "No, we won't. Because we're only going to explain certain parts to him."

Already Goku was uneasy. Even if it wasn't exactly lying, only telling Sanzo the partial truth was a huge risk. Goku was a horrible liar, too easy to read; didn't Hakkai know that?

As though reading his mind, Hakkai counseled, "It's okay, Goku. It will be the truth, provided things don't go exactly as planned."

"So?" Gojyo demanded impatiently. "What is it?"

Hakkai continued to stare at Goku, his eyes saying more than any words could. When it finally sunk in, the blood fled Goku's face. "No, wait," he said desperately. "Hakkai, we can't... I can't..."

"Listen first," Hakkai said softly. "The way we'll do it is we'll fight the demon one at a time, for as long as we can. We'll wear him down. But you have to be doing a lot of dodging, Goku. I was watching him when I fought him, and I think we can time everything perfectly."

Goku was shaking his head frantically. No longer was he slouched over; his spine was stiff, looking ready to snap in two as he leaned forward, golden eyes betraying his anxiety. "But--"

"Of course, we'll let Sanzo go after you, so he won't be injured when he has to step in," Hakkai was saying.

"I wouldn't worry about that *knight* anyway," Gojyo said mockingly. "He can take care of himself, with or without your help, monkey."

"I know that!" Goku snapped, his voice higher than usual. Both men stared at him, causing him to pause and wince. "I... I know that," he repeated, his voice quieter. "I know he doesn't need my help. And I don't need his." His pause stretched from a couple seconds to a couple minutes. At last, he said, "What d'you want me to do?"

"Come see me later, just when you get a moment, so I can explain things further." Goku looked absolutely miserable, but he nodded anyway. "And don't tell Sanzo what might be happening," Hakkai advised. Seeing the wisdom in that, Goku nodded again.

As though on cue, the door opened. Sanzo looked considerably calmer, though he did reek of smoke. Goku made a face and scooted away when the priest walked past him. Sanzo chose to ignore it.

"So," he said. "Any bright ideas?"

"Just one," Hakkai said.

Sanzo blinked, obviously not expecting that. Then he nodded once. "It better work."

"It will," Hakkai promised.

The adults began to elaborate on the plan, the brunette on the floor only absently noted. Wordless, Goku only half took in what they were saying; the rest of the time his mind wandered, brushing on thoughts he was uneasy to touch. At long last they decided it was about time to retire to bed; in six hours they would need to be awake to put the plan into action.

He didn't like it.

There was a damn good reason Goku didn't like it, but he could see it from Hakkai's point of view. They could continue fighting pointless battles that never got anywhere or run away, but neither plan was very desirable.

But then this way was dangerous. Not really to Goku, but to everyone around him.

Mostly to Sanzo. Especially to Sanzo.

He tossed and turned on the hard floor, not really trying to fall asleep as he was trying to give the impression that he was. After a while he came to rest on his right shoulder. His arm quickly started to feel numb, but he kept still anyway, listening, listening...

Sanzo wasn't moving at all.

He swallowed a sigh, settling for running his fingers through his hair. Against his touch, the diadem felt almost warm; chilled by the winter air, but not completely cold, as though it had melted into his head. It had become such a part of him that Goku couldn't imagine being without it. The idea was... scary.

Because without it he turned into that raging, bloodthirsty, horrible thing. He shivered, but it wasn't because of the cold air.

At last Goku sat up, testing his arm gingerly. It was a bit sore, but hadn't gone numb as he had suspected. He did his best to creep toward the door, but it turned out his attempts were futile.

"Where the hell are you going?"

The voice was so familiar that by now Goku sometimes suspected it spoke in his head rather than his ears. He turned to face his keeper, but all he could make out was a silhouette in the window. The moonlight was little; a cloud passed in front of it, throwing them into darker shadows. Goku could hear himself breathing, could feel Sanzo breathing, could sense that odd, heartbeat rhythm between them again.

The last thing he wanted... the last thing he ever wanted...

Goku forced a grin, one he hoped was convincing. While he couldn't see Sanzo, surely Sanzo could see him. Goku wasn't the one framed by a paler background, so some sort of light should have made him visible to the man.

"I had a couple questions for Hakkai. That's all."

Even though he couldn't see it, he could tell from Sanzo's voice that he was narrowing his eyes. "Obviously questions that I can't answer." Goku wasn't sure what to say to that, so he simply shrugged.

He did have a question, however. "Sanzo?" Without waiting for a response, he plunged on. "What if I had to turn into... you know... *that*... again." Somehow it was hard to speak of his other form, no matter how much a part of him it was supposed to be. "What if I took this off and turned into that thing again?"

Calmly, coldly, Sanzo replied, "I'd kill you."

His first warning that Sanzo was about to move wasn't a shift in the shadows, but a soft creak from the floor. Goku's eyes darted down then back up. Up close it was much easier to see Sanzo, much easier to make out the lines that shaped his glaring eyes, his suspicious frown, the tense lines that drew his eyebrows down. Sanzo was barely two feet away, but those two feet felt much more like two inches. Neither gaze wavered, though inwardly Goku was panicking, silently, fervently wishing that Sanzo wasn't as good a mind-reader as he sometimes thought.

At last, Sanzo averted his eyes, falling back a step. "Better go then, monkey."

Nodding a bit too eagerly, Goku fumbled for the doorknob, slipping out as quickly as he was allowed. Once the door was shut back behind him he let out a long breath. Somehow he wasn't relieved, just more tense.

That would have to wait until later. He hurried to Hakkai's room, rapping with his knuckles. "Hakkai? It's me..."

Unable to escape until nearly an hour later, Goku half stumbled back into the room, forgetting that Sanzo would most likely be asleep. He was tired, having had to listen to Hakkai remind him -- repeatedly! -- what to do. Where to move. How to move. Where to dodge, and how to dodge which attacks just right. The plan had to be executed perfectly.

They had, at best, four hours before they were going to head out. He needed some sleep. There had been no time to rest earlier, no indication that he should try to make time. Therefore, he was tired.

He didn't even feel the eyes watching him.

He was only half kneeling on the floor when the rough hand closed on his wrist, yanking him rudely upward. A yelp escaped his lips before he could stop it, and then Goku felt a partially gloved hand clamp down over his mouth. The next thing he saw was a pair of violet eyes burning twin holes into him.

Softly, ever so softly, Sanzo whispered, "You're so damn annoying."

Goku just stared, unable to summon a proper reaction-- or any reaction, for that matter. When he stammered his keeper's name in utter confusion, it was barely audible, already muffled by the hand over his mouth.

"Shut up," the dark voice was murmuring. "Do you think you can shut up for a couple hours?"

Goku nodded.

"Good." Then the hand slipped away, replaced with the barest ghost's touch of lips. Then another wash of warmth flowed over Goku's face. "Not a word leaves here."

His only response was to twine his arms around the man's neck, pulling him down. The situation was odd, strange, but Goku wasn't about to ask questions. Somehow, he felt that this was important; that if he backed out he was going to miss out on so much; that if he denied these unusual turn of events he was going to be missing some huge piece of a puzzle he was going to have to eventually put together. After all, Sanzo didn't do anything without considering the consequences first -- not most of the time, anyway -- and Goku not only had placed his full trust in the man, but in a way his life, and definitely his heart.

'Not a word,' he silently promised.

The feel of Sanzo's lips on his, insistently prying his mouth open, was instantly surreal. At the same time it was comfortable, easy to go along with. Goku went with it, tightening his arms around his keeper's neck and kissing back with enough excitement to make up for his lack of experience. The man's leg slipping between his brought the play to a whole new level, one that Goku was both eager for and afraid of.

Rough hands slipped beneath his shirt, sliding over the bare flesh beneath, skimming the contours of muscle. Sanzo's thumb brushed over one nipple, drawing a throttled whimper from the brunette's throat. Goku's eyes were clenched tightly shut, as though Sanzo would disappear the moment his eyes opened.

The surprisingly generous mouth left his, moving along his face and to his neck. Sanzo nipped at the boy's neck and Goku felt a brief flash of pain, yet the sigh that fell from his lips was more of a pleased murmur than a pained one. It felt good; felt nice. Sanzo's leg pressed closer to his crotch, and that felt more than good: it shot little bolts of erotica up Goku's spine. He arched into the touch, desperately biting his lip to keep quiet. Both found that nibbling beneath Goku's right ear drew out a strong reaction; he was more ticklish on that side for some reason.

Determined to have just as much control, Goku slipped a hand between their bodies, carefully avoiding Sanzo's arm and going straight for the erection straining against his leather pants. Sanzo's breath caught audibly. Emboldened, Goku felt a somewhat amused smile twist his lips as he rubbed his palm against Sanzo. A loud hiss escaped the man above him; Goku lazily raised his eyes and grinned wider.

"Brat," Sanzo managed to whisper, pushing the boy's shirt up until it bunched beneath his chin. A brief, fleeting kiss was shared, involving little more than a brush of lips and tongues, and then Goku pushed up on his elbows, deepening the kiss as he strained to get closer to his keeper. "Impatient brat," Sanzo whispered again, watching the boy's head fall back as he rubbed his leg against Goku's rapidly growing erection.

There was a moment of hesitation, a pause in which both suddenly realized the full extent of what they were doing. Now Goku noticed the heat in his face, could hear the room echo with his and Sanzo's heavy breathing, could see that Sanzo's eyes betrayed none of his thoughts.

The blonde leaned down slowly, his voice too loud as close as he was, and said, "What are you planning?"

Goku shook his head; he couldn't say anything that wouldn't confirm whatever suspicions Sanzo had. Instead, he switched roles, leaning up to kiss Sanzo beneath the jaw, raking his hands up his sides, sliding them beneath the constricting black leather so he could explore the skin beneath at will. Sanzo didn't protest. Goku allowed himself time to revel in this new privilege, continuously amazed that he was really doing this; he was touching Sanzo in ways he'd only thought of in passing, ways that had never seemed that incredible or important until now. All too soon, and yet with agonizing slowness, they had somehow managed to tangle each other in their clothes, skin slick with sweat as they panted, trying to figure out how to slip out of the constricting materials to move on.

There was something breathtakingly beautiful about Sanzo, something that gave Goku the greatest thrill to realize he was touching such a special man, pleasing him just as much as he was being pleased. It was... ethereal. Surreal. Unreal.

"Stop thinking so loudly," a voice as dark as velvet sounded. A rough, calloused hand slipped beneath his shorts, touching the boy in such a thorough way that right on command Goku's coherent thought process completely shut down.

How they managed not to attract attention Goku was never sure; to his own ears his gasps sounded loud, his whimpers audible enough to be heard not only from every corner of the inn, but every corner of the entire village. Every inch of his skin felt alive, burning with the rawest sensation of pleasure. Somehow his arms had found their way around Sanzo, clutching at the muscles of the man's back as he tried to keep himself as close to his keeper as possible, his breath wet and hot as he panted against Sanzo's skin.

Thought had nothing to do with anything between them, if it ever had anything to do with them in the first place. One thing that Goku had always found interesting about their relationship -- be it companionable or otherwise -- was that both tended to act without thinking around each other. Maybe it just came naturally; maybe there was some deeper, thought-provoking meaning behind it. Whatever it was, it made the moment that much more amazing.

Goku's legs slipped over Sanzo's back, his feet scrambling to find a good foothold somewhere, anywhere in the rumpled sheets. The pressure of Sanzo above him, grinding down against him wasn't as scary as he would have thought; it wasn't surrender that had lead him to end up squirming beneath the man, simply convenience. Sanzo seemed to know what he was doing, and Goku... he was acting on pure instinct. He was reacting to the breathtaking sensations, only concerned with intensifying the friction between them.

It was just when the creaking of the bed couldn't get any louder, when it couldn't possibly hold their weight and activities much longer, when it began to thump audibly against the wall behind them, that Goku finally managed to grasp the release he'd sought this whole time. He let his cry be muffled by his lover's shoulder, his eyes clenched shut as the sensations overwhelmed him, riding over him and slowly ebbing away, taking its time. Above him Sanzo made a strangled sound, his head bent forward, eyes wildly pinning Goku's until he, too, was spent. Though his mind must have protested at the indignity, Sanzo's body couldn't seem to help from going all but limp, half covering the boy beneath him. Both were panting heavily, tired but satiated.

His hand trembling, Goku brushed sweaty hair from Sanzo's eyes. He was hesitant to kiss him, but brave once he found he wasn't going to be refused just because the sex was over. Too tired to do any more than tease, he finally pulled away, rolling over on his back and staring up at the ceiling.

His heartbeat slowly came to beat at a more regular pace, steady and comfortable. He sighed heavily, ready to drift off. The last thing he heard was Sanzo murmuring beside him:

"Wake up soon."

- TBC -

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