Whoops...I just realized I didn't put the disclaimer in part 2.
So, this counts for both: Sailor Moon and all respective
characters aren't mine. They belong to Naoko and Toei
and all those other companies. Ok, in this chapter, I'm
wrapping up "Unnatural Phenomena" and doing "Shutter
Bugged".



"Introspection, chapter 3"

by Sailor Tampa

BSBkikass5@aol.com



"......And on the eighth day.......God created Darien..."



**Oh, and many thanks to Jade who has been the *only*
person to e-mail me about this fic, and convinced me to
keep writing it when I wanted to stop.^_^**



"So Darien you have a girlfriend?" Raye asks me ever-
so-casually. Hmmm...if I say no, she'll probably think
she's got a chance with me and never leave me alone...
but if I say yes, she might get the hint. Option #2 slowly
starts to weigh out the previous. But, what if Serena found
out and thought I was taken? Wait a minute...where did
that come from?! -sigh- There you go again Meatball Head
...confusing me with my feelings. I pick up my cup of coffee
and raise it to my lips when a blur of blonde hair catches the
corner of my eye. Without moving my head, I glance over and
see Serena crouching in back of the windowsill flowers, a
hand cupped behind her ear. My heart suddenly starts to
soar, but I don't know why...I glance back at Raye who is
still waiting in anticipation for my answer. Oh, just be honest
with the poor girl!

"No, not at the moment." I say with a deep sigh. I think I've just made the biggest mistake of my life. "Yeah, who's got
time to date, not me, no way!" she says, looking down at
the table.I just roll my eyes and take a sip of my coffee. I glance up and find her staring at me with some weird glint in her eyes....

I shudder and quickly look away. Ugh...its like she's probing my mind for something. After a few minutes, I feel her intense gaze linger off of me. I sigh with relief and look up, only to see Serena sit down in a booth a few tables away. An urge to go over and talk to her wells up inside of me. I guess its because I haven't seen her yet today, or her *brilliant* smile...Damn.

"Hey Darien, do you wanna go rent a row boat...over at Fairview Park?" Raye asks me apprehensively, fiddling with her napkin. I groan silently. I don't really feel up to going anywhere else with Raye...she's a nice girl and all but, a just a *tad* to pushy. Oh, well....I've got nothing better to do.

"Sure, that would be nice." I accept sincerely. Besides, if
Serena followed us here, then maybe she'll she Raye and I
on the lake and become even more jealous....

* * *

"Wow, this lake is really beautiful!" I exclaim as I look out over the sparkling blue water. It kinda reminds me of Serena's eyes....

"Yeah, I can't believe there going to cover it all in concrete." Raye says, looking over her shoulder. "Huh?" I say in disbelief. When did this happen?

"They're going to fill in all in for an office building." she explains, sounding angry. This sucks. I really love this park. Its where I go when I have to study for a major exam, or I want to think,and even when I'm in a bad mood and need cheering up. But Serena usually cheers me up. She always seems to be around when I'm feeling lousy...and then when she leaves, even if we've exchanged insults or haven't even glanced at each other,I always feel better. Its like she's....she's....what I thought she was when I first saw her....an angel. The angel that lights up my life. I continue a conversation with Raye about the park, but my mind is elsewhere. I turn my head to the side in thought. Wait...what's that? I squint and lean forward a bit to try to make out the golden blur on the shore. I relax and sit back up as a smile curves on my lips. Its Serena. She's standing there, apparently angry, by the rose bushes. But, there's someone else with her....it looks like...a guy. Jealously bubbles up inside my chest. I try to calm it but can't. I glare darkly at the figure standing behind Serena. So that must be the guy she was telling me was in love with her the other day. I'll kill him.

***************************

"You wanna go see the flowers?" Raye asks, interupting
my thoughts. Yes! Perfect, Raye! We'll go see the flowers,
well, the roses anyway, and then I'll accidentally bump into
Serena! I have to get a closer look at this lucky bastard.
"Yeah, I hear the rose garden's amazing. I'd like to see it
before its destroyed." I say convincingly. I suddenly scream
and double over in pain, clutching my forehead. No! It can't
be happening! Not again! Why?! Why does this always happen?!
Out of nowhere, I see a flock of wild birds headed straight for us. I glance up at Raye's fearful face and saw only one thing:

A big fat lawsuit.

"Watch out!" I yell, grabbing her head to cover it as our boat
tips over. My head still throbs, but I ignore it and we swim
to shore, sputtering and coughing before collapsing on the dock.

"Are you allright?" I ask, just making sure. She nods slowly
and starts to get up. "What do you think happened?" she
asks me shakily. I put it the only way I can.
"Its like nature's gone wacko!" I exclaim in disbelief. "In
a big way!" she says matter-of-factly finishing my thought.
"I gotta go." she states flatly as she stands completely up.
"Hope you don't mind, there's something I forgot to do." She
runs off swiftly while I lie there still, catching my breath. As soon as I can no longer see Raye, my horrendous headache
comes back and before I know it, I black out.

* * *

Oh man...how long have I been out of it? It must not have
been that long, because I'm still wet from the lake. As I get
to my feet, I feel somehow at ease with myself. Like, I had
just fufilled a mission or task of some kind. I brush the
feeling off and wonder if Raye must've picked up on my
signals that I wasn't interested and gone home. One can
only hope.....

"Shit!" I curse silently as I see her up ahead with Serena.
Serena! I wonder if she's still with that guy...
"Raye, I thought you had to leave." I ask rather annoyed that
she wasn't already gone. She doesn't answer me, and instead
whispers something into Serena's ear which triggers a "You
can waste as much of your time with this creep as you want
Raye!" Her words stung me for some reason. Does she really
think I'm *that* bad? Does she realize what she does to me?
What she's doing to me right now? Looking so devastatingly
beautiful and innocent just standing there. *Just* being?!
And what about her so called "love"....he probably doesn't
deserve her. But then again, who does?Do......I..?
"Hey, ladies,why don't we get a milkshake?"I ask, staring
directly at Serena. Maybe if I talked to her a little instead of insulting her, we might get somewhere.

"Oh, yes I'd love one Darien!" Raye interjects. Oh, man...
I said "ladies" didn't I.....

"Ah! There you are!" A nasal voice shouts from a few feet
away.

"Melvin!" Serena groans as her face washes over with
annoyance. Melvin? Is that--Oh. My.God....this is some kind
of joke, right?

"I'm glad I found you." he says happily as he stops in front of
us all. "I thought we'd go for a boat ride out on the lake, it'll be so romantic!" the short boy with scraggily brown hair and large glasses says. No, this can't be the guy I saw before...Serena looks nervous and then stutters a bit.

"Were not on a date you big dork!" she finally says. I silently
chuckle. It is. And she doesn't even like him! She must've been
talking about another guy. Melvin looks crushed.

"But we shared that prune milkshake, and then took that lovely
walk in the park!" he says defensively, trying to convince
himself that is was a date. I can't resist the chance to tease
her and see her face flush with annoyance. She always looks
so adorable like that...and its really the reason I call her "Meatball Head", just to see her cute profile.
"Sounds like a date to me!" I say tauntingly. And, as if on cue,she blushes and narrows her eyes at me. "You stay out of it!"she exclaims through gritted teeth. "I am not on a date with Melvin,okay?!" she declares, throwing her arms in the air.
"Looks like one to me!" we all say in unison. She balls her
fists and glares at all of us. First Raye, then a blue-haired girl who appeared a few minutes ago, and then me. I can't resist and I wink at her and smile. Her face quickly turns form annoyed to surprised as she blushes a little.

"So....how about those milkshakes?" I ask with a grin. Boy, am
I relieved! Melvin is just some dork that has a crush on Serena,nothing more. And now were going to get a milkshake!

"Yeah!" Raye exclaims as she grabs my arm in her deathlock
again. Oops. I forgot I invited Serena *and* Raye. Serena looks
at me curiuosly and then smiles a little. I guess thats a yes.
She invites her blue-haired friend "Amy" to join us and the girl accepts a little reluctantly. Melvin says something about the internet and then hurries away, much to Serena's relief. We
start to walk to the cafe, Raye still clingling to me. I'm *really* uncomfortable and gently try to pry her away. To my satisfaction, she gets the hint and lets go. Amy and Serena start to talk about how school went, while Raye says something about a Temple, although I'm not listening. I'm staring at Serena, which oddly enough, I find myself doing alot of lately. A few minutes later, we reach the doors. And, being the gentleman I am, hold the door for all of them. Serena is in front of us all, looking for a booth.

"Hey, there's one!" she exclaims as she points her index finger
at it. She quickly runs over and takes a window seat. A few
steps later, we all arrive in front of the booth. Amy moves to
sit down next to Serena when a sudden impulse races through
me. I quickly dash in front of Amy and plop down on the seat
next to Serena. All three of them look shocked. Amy then
shrugs and moves to take the window seat on the opposite
side. Raye is still standing there, staring at me.

"Uh, Darien, aren't you going to sit next to me?" she asks
with a tinge of confusion, but trying to sound casual.

"No." I say flatly. "I want to sit here." Why did I say that?
Raye scowls at Serena and then nods before taking a seat
next to Amy. Serena's eyes grow wide as she turns her
head extremely slow to look at me as if my hair was on fire.
Confusion makes its mark on her lovely face as I look back
at her. Why did I say that? Why did I sit here? I search for
the answers in her deep azure eyes but come up short. I
don't know why I did it, but I did. And for some odd reason,
I didn't regret it.

* * *

I smile as I saunter into the automatic doors of the Crown
Arcade. Ahhh...no love-struck school girls hanging aroung
bugging Andrew and annoying me today! Finally I can relax
a bit. I wave at Andrew and then sit down to play the imfamous
Sailor V game everyone, especially Serena, babbles on and
on about. The start-up music chimes and I start to play,
dodging monsters and calling upon V's special attacks. Hey,
this isn't so bad! In fact, I really like it. Zap! "Oh your dead now!" I mumble under my breath, as I get really into the game. I play for several minutes more, racking up as many points as possible, and ignoring all current surroundings.

"Cheer up , Serena!" I hear Andrew say and pull my eyes away
from the screen for a second, causing Sailor V to bite the dust, and my quarter to be lost.
"What does your brother know anyway?Forget him! If you
wanna go into modeling, you gotta just go for it!" Andrew
encourages Serena with a warm pat on the shoulder. I see
her blush slightly at Andrew's touch and then ask him if she's really got what it takes. Of course she's got what it takes! Beautful, funny, charming, although ever-so clutzy...

"Yeah, absolutely. I can just see you right now--" I think and
then realize I said it outloud. Oh no! "Tumbling right of the
stage! Its Serena the hyena!" I recover quickly, taking off
my dark sunglasses. Phew! That was a close one! I turn to
look at Serena seated on a stool by the crane game, crossing
her arms and scowling at me.
"Just stay out of this, ok Darien? Who asked you?" she demands.
I smile as I rise up off of my chair and tuck my sunglasses
into my front shirt pocket. "I'm just trying to help you Serena...
" I say, barely able to keep my grin from getting any wider and
sounding extrememly fake.
"Modeling's tough work. You've gotta get up early and do
exactly what your told, you've gotta be on time, and you've
really gotta watch what you eat! You can't eat any junk!" I
say.
"Creep! How would you know?"Serena retorts with a frown.
"Well, actually when I first got out of high school, I did some
modeling to pay my tuition." I say hesitantly. Damn, now I've
done it. There goes my secret days as a model. I haven't even
told Andrew about that, I now I've told Serena! What is wrong
with me?!Her mouth drops open.

"You did modeling?" she asks in utter disbelief. I shake my head and continue on. I have to stear her away from it; she'll ruin her life if she models.

"Sure did, and it's not all glamour, believe me." I warn her, trying to sway her desicion. She eyes me catiously for a moment and then sticks her nose in the air.

"Yeah, well don't you worry about me buddy!"Serena says,
obviously confident. I sigh and decide to try another approach to this."I'm not. I know your going to fail. You're never on time, you're always cramming junk food into your mouth, and you can't even walk one block without falling down...and taking at least three other people with you!" I say and immediately regret it. Tears well up in her gorgeous eyes. I can see her holding her breath, trying to keep them from spilling onto her cheeks.

"Thankyou so very, very much Darien, but I'm going to do just
fine, you watch!" she chokes out as evenly as possible and
starts to walk away, fists clenched and muscles tight. I feel
like the biggest jerk. Whats it my business if Serena wants
to be a model? Just because I had few bad expieriences,
didn't mean I had to go and ruin her dreams. I want to
apologize so badly my heart starts to ache. But I know
that the last thing she'll want right now is for me to bother
her. I use all my will power to try to hold back and not
run after her as Andrew speaks.
"You know Darien, sometimes your pretty mean. How
come your always so rough on that girl?" he says a little
angrily. I sigh and swallow hard as I come up with the best
answer I can. I mean, *I* don't even know why I do it.
Except for the fact she's so adorable when she's pissed off....
"I really don't mean to be....it's something that just comes
over me when I'm around her....A feeling that I just can't quite explain." I say quietly to Andrew. He shrugs and walks away to aid some girls with the token machine. I sigh pitifully again as I watch Serena exit the automatic doors. I'm pretty proud of myself for being able to hold back and not talk to her, although I want to...*desperately*. I tear my gaze away from her to look inside the crane game. I wonder if that caped doll is still hiding in there somewhere. Suddenly, I hear a choked sob and jerk my head towards the doors, just in time to see Serena run off at full speed, crying. That's it. I *can't* standit any more. I bolt out of the arcade at full speed, frantically searching for Serena. My heart feels so cold and icy with the knowledge that *I'm* the one who made her cry like that.

"Where is she?!" I mutter aloud, looking all around me. I close
my eyes and let out a frustrated groan. I'm such a moron!
Stupid, stupid, stupid, stup--Suddenly, before I can mentally
abuse myself any more, something, which feels like my sixth
sense overwhelms me and starts to lead me somewhere.
This feeling is so new to me. I've always heard of people having a sixth sense, but nothing this weird has ever happened to me before. I decide to go with the feeling and run straight
ahead, towards the park. As I near the lake, I see two blonde
pigtails flailing wildly in the wind in front of me.
"Serena....." I whisper thankfully as I pick up the pace
and shorten the distance between us. My own heavy breathing
and heartbeat echo loudly in my ears, but still, I pick up on
her agonizing sobs that she's shedding.....because of me.
"Serena!" I yell, hoping to get her attention. She stumbles a
bit, but then pumps her legs even faster, most likely to get
away from me. But she's not. I have to apologize.
"Serena!!!" I yell louder, with frustration and easily catch up
to her. I'm now a few feet in back of her, but slipping quickly. I'm exhausted. How can this girl run so much? Before I can blink again, she trips and falls to her knees on the shore of the lake, sobbing uncontrollably. As I slow to a walk, my heart breaks at the sight of her;crying her eyes out and barely able to hold herself from running so much. Maybe I'd better leave her alone for a while.....NO! No, Darien you are going to apologize if it is the *last* thing you do!I take a few seconds to catch my breath and then kneel down and pull her into my arms. She whimpers angrily and desperatly tries to get away from me with what little strength she must have left.

"Get away from me!" she screams as she punches and pushes
on my chest. I only grip her body tighter in my embrace.
"Get away from me Darien! I hate you! I hate you! I HATE
YOU!!!!!" she cries at the top of her lungs and then falls limp
against me, giving in. I rest my head on top of hers as she
cries weakly into my collar, trembling slightly. My god, what
have I done?! What have I done!? How could I have been so
cruel to her. To a girl who brings nothing but happiness and
light into my life. Who's pure-heart and clutziness are the
things that give me the motivation to actually get up in the
morning! I'm full of self-loathing right now. How could I do this to her.....I know I can't fix what I've done, but maybe I can help it. My own tears threaten to spill as I close my eyes
and bury my face in her golden hair.

"I'm sorry, Serena....I'm so sorry..." I whisper. She responds
with a small whimper and then starts to cry harder again.
I hold her so tightly, my muscles ache, but I don't care.
"I-I didn't mean it Serena...I was just teasing...I'm sorry..."
I say pathetically and shut my eyes even tighter. Her crying
dies down a bit and she sniffs tiredly into my shirt. She
slowly lifts her head up and looks into my eyes.

"T-That's okay, Darien." she stutters softly. "I shouldn't
have gotten so upset. I already know that I'm ugly, and
klutzy and stupid and I'd never make a good model
anyways...."

What!? I had no idea she thought so lowly of herself!

"Serena, " I start as I unwrap my arms from around her
and place my hands on her shoulders. "You are not
*any* of those things! You may not have the best
coordination, or the hottest grades, but your a wonderful
person..." I say kindly. She responds by slumping her
head down and letting another tear escape from her eye.
I tilt her chin up with my forefingers so she is looking into
my eyes.
"....Not to mention beautiful..." I say with a smile, causing
her to blush and smile also.
"Your just saying that to make me feel better..." she giggles,
wiping her face.
"Maybe so..." I start with a grin. "..but that doesn't mean
its not true." She sighs lightly and then tries to stand on
her own. She fails and falls into my lap, where I catch her
by the waist. My heartbeat speeds up rapidly and my breathing
slows. Our faces our inches away from each other. My
mind is screaming at me to stop, but my heart is telling me
to move closer. I don't know why, but I'm slowly inching
my lips toward hers. So close.....so, so close...
" Well, I better be going now Darien." Serena says cheerfully,
just before our lips touched. I akwardly jerk away and stand up.
"Uh, um yeah! So, I guess I'll see ya later then!" I stutter.
She smiles and then stand up herself.
"Thanks." she says softly and then turns and walks away.
I just stand there for a while, with the goofiest grin on my face.I was so close, yet so far. I almost kissed her, but then again, maybe I would've pulled back at the last second. My feelings for Serena have increased dramatically, I know that. But I can't help but wonder, what *would* it have been like to kiss her? I dust off my shirt and pants and then start to make my way back to the arcade.

Well, theres only one way to find out....

* * *



Yes, I know what you people are thinking...this is a bit too
much like Jennifer Wand's "Darien's View";especially all the
references I make, but believe me, its not intentional! I would
never try to steal someone else's idea or story. And, if it seems like I am, let me know, and I'll revise it.