MarshAngelMarshAngel
watsonma@hotmail.com
http://angelmoon.sinfree.net
rated R-NC17 
disclaimer: standard i.e.: no claim of ownership has or will be made
  
I know Im being slow about this and I apologize for taking so long but school 
takes some precedence after all. The next chapters should be out a bit sooner. 
Be patient with me. 
 
 
Touch
Chapter 8
 
Usagi, would you care to answer the question?
Usagi was suddenly snapped out of her daydream. She stared blankly at her 
teacher completely at a loss as to what the question was.
II uh I dont know.
She received a disapproving glare over the top of her history teachers glasses. 
She sighed in frustration.
How was she supposed to do better in school when she couldnt even keep her mind 
on the subject at hand? It had been a week and a half since Endymion walked out 
of her life and still it felt like things were all over the place. She wasnt 
sleeping, she wasnt concentrating, and all she could think of was escaping the 
mess theyd made. 
Things werent all that much better at home either. Shed made a conscious 
effort to be home earlier and spend time with her family, which turned out to be 
relatively easy, as the Dark Kingdom seemed to have dropped off radar. Things 
were still a little uncomfortable however. 
Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that her father couldnt reconcile 
the picture of the pig-tailed pudgy-cheeked angel on his desk with the sexy, 
mature, superhero she actually was. Whatever it was, it bothered her the way her 
parents looked at her these days. It was as if they were always trying to figure 
her out. But it was the look of worry on her mothers face when she left the 
house every morning and the searching look on her fathers face when she came 
home that really bothered her. It was a constant reminder of the very thing she 
was trying so hard to forget.
She sighed and did her best to attempt to follow the subject. It was boring 
beyond all belief. Her eyes wanted to drift shut. She became vaguely aware of 
Makotos mildly worried sidelong glance. The awareness of her friends watchful 
eyes forced her awake. 
Her friends knew that she was trying harder and their knowledge of the fact was 
like a constant push to succeed. She knew she should be grateful for the 
encouragement and for the most part she was. Unfortunately she couldnt help but 
feel failure was eminent and she couldnt bear to disappoint them. 
****
 
 
Usagi Usagi!  
Usagi looked up with a blank look on her face.
Rei frowned. It had been the fourth time shed called to her friend. Usagi had 
been distracted, quiet, and uncommunicative for the past two weeks. She could 
tell that her princess was only vaguely aware of the weight shed lost and the 
dark shadows beneath her eyes that told Rei she wasnt sleeping well if at all.
Ok thats it! What is wrong with you?
What are you talking about? Usagi asked.
Ive called you four times just now to get your attention and you havent 
answered me and it isnt because youre doing your homework!
Usagi glanced down at the unfinished math assignment shed been working on for 
three hours.
I guess Im just tired. Too much math is not a good thing.
I might agree with that if you had been paying attention to any of it. Youve 
been staring off into space for god only knows how long. Youve been listless 
and you havent been sleeping well since Endymion left.
This has nothing to do with Endymion. Usagi snapped. Im just tired and 
frustrated ok. I feel like everyones staring at me all the time, wondering 
about god only knows what. I feel like Im trying so hard to fix my school 
issues but its not hard enough. I just she sighed. 
You miss him.
No.
You Rei began but Usagi cut her off sharply.
No!
Rei backed down. Usagis tone made it clear there was no further discussion 
despite her opinion.
I was thinking that boarding school might not be such a bad idea. Usagi stated 
softly.
Look, I didnt mean to hurt your feelings or anything. One little comment 
shouldnt send you running off to a whole new country! Rei yelled hurriedly. 
Believe it or not Rei, this has nothing to do with you. Things arent exactly 
working out for me at school. My parents might be right. Maybe I need a new 
environment.
In a whole new country? Rei almost yelled.
Ive just been thinking about it thats all.
Youd honestly consider leaving? Did you forget who you are and what we do? How 
can you even consider leaving knowing what your duty is?
I can because its my choice. Dont you think Ive thought of that?
And let me guess thats the only reason youre still here, Rei said harshly.
Actually, Im more than confident that I could leave and you guys would be fine 
without me.
Then why are you still here? Rei questioned sullenly.
Because you are, Usagi whispered quietly. I think Id miss you guys too 
much.
They both sighed and stared off into space. After a couple minutes, the 
depressive atmosphere got to Rei. She stood up suddenly, grabbing Usagi by the 
arm and pulling her after her. 
Youre depressing me. Lets get out of here and go shopping. 
Now?
Yes now.
But what about my homework?
You werent doing it anyway.
Its a little late dont you think?
Youve been out later and the stores dont close for hours.
Of course Rei never gave Usagi the opportunity to disagree and before she knew 
it they were in the subway. 
I cant believe were doing this.
You had something better to do on a Sunday afternoon? Rei asked  
 Usagi shrugged. I guess not.
Usagi looked around the crowded subway compartment. It wasnt too crowded but 
there were enough people that she and Rei had to stand along with a few others. 
She looked around out of boredom. 
Subway behavior never ceased to amuse her. No one spoke to each other and almost 
everyone sitting had their eyes closed as though trying to block out the reality 
of their current location. She could easily understand. The subways, for all 
their convenience, were one of the more dismal locations and forms of 
transportation of the modern world.  
Her eyes wandered around aimlessly, finding little of interest to look at. 
Suddenly she felt eyes seemingly fixated on her back. She wasnt quite sure how 
she became aware of the feeling of being watched but she felt the sensation 
quite strongly. She turned her head to her left but saw no one looking her way. 
She asked herself the question her mind was trying to push aside. Could it be 
that Endymion was back again? Was she wrong and hed decided to come back. She 
refused to analyze the weak unsteady feeling that thought created in her 
stomach. 
There it was again; the sensation that someone was looking at her intently. She 
glanced to her right and then to her left before turning all the way around. Her 
eyes searched the crowd and settled on a pair of blue-green eyes that didnt 
waver even when she caught them looking. 
She was stunned by the unwelcome feeling of disappointment. It wasnt Endymion. 
Rei had turned to follow her friends eyes.
Oh my god! she whispered. 
What? Usagi asked pulling her eyes away from the ocean colored eyes across the 
compartment.
There is, quite possibly, the most gorgeous guy alive staring at you.
Usagi looked towards him again and had to blush at the intensity with which he 
returned her gaze. He brushed a long lock of shoulder length blue hair out of 
his eyes and smiled at her. She had to admit the guy personified cool and it was 
then that everything came rushing back to her.
That smile, those eyes, the great looks and amazing sense of style. He was a 
modern interpretation of Mael. Of course there was something different about 
this look-alike, because of course he could be nothing but a look alike. It 
wasnt that a reincarnation of her fiance was an impossibility it was she 
refused to accept that this could be Mael. 
 Oh god, hes coming over! Rei whispered harshly in her ear.
Usagi watched dumbstruck as he headed over towards her. It was then that she did 
something silly. She panicked.
The train screeched to a halt and the door opened at their stop and she grabbed 
Reis arm and pulled her out. 
What the hell do you think youre doing?  Rei snapped.
I panicked ok!
You panicked when the hottest guy Ive ever seen starts walking towards you! 
Are you insane? 
Maybe. And dont you think youre overreacting just a bit? Hes not the most 
gorgeous guy to ever walk the planet.
I suppose if youre going to be comparing him to Endymion then that may 
actually be true.
Can I get through an entire day without a mention or thought of Endymion? Im 
sure hed be deeply satisfied to know that its as though he never left because 
he seems to be haunting me just as before! Not everything in my life revolves 
around him, so from here on lets just not mention his name again!
Now whos overreacting? Rei muttered beneath her breath. 
They had just completed the lengthy trek up the stairs from the subway when Rei 
grabbed her and whispered. 
Dont look now but I think your subway buddy is behind us.
Great, Usagi muttered sarcastically. Every moment it found a chance her life 
grew more complicated. Shed lost her virginity, lost her lover, and now it 
seemed the doppelganger of her long lost fiance was following her down the 
streets of Tokyo.
Rei glanced over at Usagi who kept walking without looking back. Why couldnt 
she just admit that she loved Endymion? Rei was certainly no expert on love or 
sex; in fact other peoples behavior concerning both subjects baffled her 
completely. 
How could one involve oneself with another person on such a deeply physical 
level and not get emotionally involved? Sometimes, from what she could see, it 
seemed possible, but then other times when people tried to separate their 
emotions from their sexual involvements it was disastrous. Was that what Usagi 
had tried to do with Endymion? 
From what she could understand at least one of them, most likely both, had 
unintentionally invested a great deal of emotion, that at least one of them was 
having problems identifying, into their relationship and while she had no clue 
as to how Endymion dealt with things she was almost certain that Usagi was in 
denial. 
Of course there was the possibility that Usagi wasnt lying and she really 
didnt love him, but somehow that didnt seem quite right. What she was having a 
hard time understanding was why Usagi, if she did love the man, couldnt or 
wouldnt admit it? 
After a short walk they entered the mall and headed for the escalators. It 
seemed both girls had momentarily forgotten the man following them. Their friend 
didnt seem to have forgotten them however. Usagi entered the first clothing 
store to their right as they stepped off the escalator and He followed them in, 
surprising her by stepping right in her path.
Hi, he greeted confidently as though theyd been friends forever.
She returned his greeting tentatively with a slight question in her tone and a 
very skeptical look on her face. The instincts that belonged to any twenty-first 
century female with common sense kicked in. This guy could be a stalker, a 
murderer, a rapist; he could be anyone. 
He looked so much like Mael. But looking into his eyes, the resemblance seemed 
entirely on the surface.  
He recognized the look on her face. It was the skeptical, wary, look of a girl 
about to be hit on by a perfect, potentially dangerous, stranger. He held up 
both hands in a gesture that was supposed to convey his innocence. 
Im not a stalker.
Usagi raised a dubious eyebrow but said nothing. 
Im merely a guy trying to hit on a beautiful girl.
A small, somewhat unintentional smile spread on her face. What? No line?
What makes you think that wasnt a line? he replied.
Id hope youd be more creative than that.
And Id like to think I didnt need one.
Usagi said nothing, waiting patiently for him to get to the point.
I go to your school you know, he said and she was surprised. 
I dont think Ive ever seen you before. She was sure shed have remembered. 
But then again, she wasnt the most observant person, particularly on school 
grounds.
I just started. Im a senior. Ive seen you.
When she said nothing, he took the moment to introduce himself. Im Hisahiko.
She paused for a moment, deciding whether or not to give him her name.
Usagi, she replied, after consideration.
He smiled thoughtfully. The name doesnt really suit you. Bunnys are such 
fidgety creatures. You seem controlled.
She raised an eyebrow at that comment, pushing away a frown that wanted to come 
to the surface. control, that word was becoming too familiar.
Thats a deep observation considering I just met you.
Im an observant kind of guy. Wait dont say it, he said suddenly.
Say what?
You were probably about to say: Observe this: Im not interested.
Usagi couldnt help but smile. I wasnt. Even if she should, just on 
principle. 
Get turned down a lot? she questioned mischievously.
No not really. He didnt expand on the subject. 
So since you werent going to say that, I dont suppose you would mind if I 
took down your number?
Its going to be hard to take it down if I dont give it to you.
And you seem like the type of person interested in making other peoples lives 
easier.
Usagi thought for a moment. If there were ever a way to get past Endymion and to 
make sure everyone else forgot him this was certainly one way. It wasnt as 
though she got hit on by a cute guy everyday. In fact, she couldnt recall it 
ever happening. 
He certainly seemed likeable enough and despite his resemblance to Mael, he 
seemed nothing like him. She decided, in a flash decision to give him her 
number. 
Well dont you have a little black book or something? she asked. Or is it too 
big to carry around with you?
He seemed only slightly surprised at her decision. He pulled out a card from one 
of his pockets and handed her a pen. She wrote her number down. The decision 
only seemed a little insane after shed made it. 
I will call you, he announced in a way that was oddly convincing. Maybe Ill 
even see you in school tomorrow. Goodbye Usagi.
When he left Usagi suddenly became aware of a very stunned Rei.
What? she asked as though she were oblivious to what had just occurred.
There is definitely something wrong with you.
****
 
 
Usagi arrived home late from the mall with nothing to show for her efforts. She 
hadnt been particularly in the mood for shopping but she had tried. She had 
tried on a half dozen items just to get Rei off her back. She sat down at the 
kitchen table and watched her mother finish cleaning up the last of the dinner 
dishes. 
How was the mall? Her mother asked.
It was ok I guess.
You dont sound too enthusiastic.
Its only the mall.
Ikuko sighed. Usagi used to think shopping was the high point of life.
Have their been any more attacks? she asked tentatively.
Usagi was silent for a moment before answering. No. There havent. That doesnt 
mean that there wont be any more in the future, she added.
I know you dont want to think about it but your father and I would really like 
it if youd just think about some of those schools Usagi.
Usagi played with her fingers mindlessly, staring down at her hands rather than 
facing her mothers concerned eyes.
I have, Mom. Its just not really an option.
Its just that especially with this thing with Endymion
Can we not talk about him? Usagi asked stiffly. Hes gone.
All Im saying is that you need to get your mind off everything around here.
I know that. But you know what I have to do. Leaving isnt an option.
You cant just be a senshi forever, Usa. What about what you need? What about 
your future?
I dont know. I dont know anything ok! Why do we keep talking about it like 
its something I have control over? I didnt choose this life. Sometimes I wish 
I never became Sailor Moon, that I was just perfectly normal, but I cant just 
wish it all away. This is the way it is, I have accepted that so can we just let 
it go! 
Her mother was silent and the tension in the air was thick.
Im sorry Mom. I didnt mean to yell at you. Im just frustrated thats all.
I know theres a lot of pressure on you. I just dont want you to give up on 
your future.
I know.
Usagi left the room, rubbing her stiff neck as she went to her room. She looked 
over at the books on her desk. She had to be in school tomorrow. She had a test 
on Tuesday that she wouldnt be prepared for even she studied. She tried to 
sleep but only tossed and turned fitfully well into the night.
Late night, or early morning she lay wide awake, flat on her back staring into 
the darkness. Shed had a dream, not unlike the ones Endymion induced. Of course 
there was something significant missing. There was the desire but not the 
fulfillment. There had been all the sensations that his touch provoked but 
theyd all faded to nothing. She felt empty and desperate. Why did she want him 
so much?
She gave up on trying to sleep and got up and turned on the light. She should 
probably do something to fill the time until the sun rose and she had to get 
ready for school. She sighed as she looked at the pile of books on her desk. Now 
would be as good a time as any to try to catch up on some studying. 
Unfortunately none of those books were looking particularly appealing at the 
moment.  
She walked over and picked one that seemed more readable than the others. She 
flipped through it first before finally settling on a chapter with which she 
thought she should finally begin studying.
***
At the end of the next school day Usagi was worn out. She could hardly wait to 
get home and relax. She frowned a little as she picked her books up. She 
wouldnt get to relax; she had to study. Study, a short word to describe the 
torturous nature of the activity.
She jumped in surprise and nearly dropped the books in her arms when she turned 
around only to find someone standing there.
Sorry. Didnt mean to scare you.
She looked up to see Hisahiko. 
Hi, she said trying to force a smile but the expression far more resembled a 
grimace. It hadnt been a good day. Early in the morning, when studying had had 
its usual effect, shed fallen asleep at her desk with her books open and had 
rushed to get dressed and make it out of the house but she had still shown up 
late for class. Mitchell hadnt bothered with detention; hed sent her to the 
principals office. She supposed hed hoped to have her suspended but all shed 
gotten was a forty-minute lecture on punctuality and the importance of a good 
education. She was becoming much too familiar with school administration or more 
importantly; they were becoming very familiar with her.
Hed then sent her to the guidance counselors office where shed waited for 
over an hour only to find out that the guidance counselor had gone home early 
and all that wasted time caused her to miss the review for her chemistry exam. 
Shed also been forced to make up a quiz shed forgotten about, and missed while 
sitting in the principals office, but she may as well have not taken it, 
because she failed miserably. 
Hisahiko raised a questioning eyebrow at her. You really should smile more.
Nothing to smile about, she grumbled. They walked towards the exit of the 
school building.
It cant be that bad. 
And yet somehow it is.
Want to talk about it?
She was silent for a moment in consideration. She knew nothing about him, had 
only met him yesterday. It seemed inappropriate to share even the slightest bit 
of personal information with a perfect stranger no matter his attractive 
qualities. 
No. Ill be ok, she replied, choosing not to share. It has just been a bad 
day, not unlike a dozen others before it.
He nodded in understanding. How about I try and cheer you up?
She looked at him questioningly. 
How about I take you out now, for I guess we could call it a pre-dinner late 
lunch slash afternoon snack.
Usagi smiled. I dont think I can go for a meal that complicated. I have to 
study for an exam anyway.
You dont sound too excited about it.
I dont think anyone, besides Ami that is, could actually be excited about 
studying for chemistry. They certainly wouldnt be if they were me.
How about I help you study?
Why would you want to do that? 
Helping you study would make an interesting prelude to my actually asking you 
out.
She was once again surprised and a bit thrown off. I dont think youre 
supposed to tell me that.
I wouldnt want you to be unprepared.
Youre serious arent you? She questioned, not quite sure he meant to help 
her. 
He shrugged nonchalantly. Im good with science and I have nothing better to do 
and even if I did Im sure it wouldnt be nearly as interesting as spending time 
with you.
You certainly have a way with words, she commented quietly. 
When shed given him her number at the mall she hadnt really been hoping that 
hed call. The idea of using him to get over Endymion had been merely an idea 
and perhaps not even a good one. Of course, there wasnt supposed to be anything 
to get over so technically there wasnt a need for anyone else. 
Now that she was faced with the actual prospect of having to make a decision 
whether or not to accept a date from Hisahiko, she was more than a little 
nervous. She kept attempting to push away the intruding sensation of guilt that 
kept thrusting against the edges of her mind. 
There was nothing to be guilty over, she reminded herself. Endymion was she 
stopped herself from following the line of thought. There would be no more 
thoughts of Endymion.
 library?
Huh? Usagi questioned. Shed been so involved with her thoughts; she hadnt 
heard what hed said.
Do you want to go to the library? he repeated.
I suppose so. 
***
 
A half an hour later, Usagi was already grateful for his help. She had a feeling 
she might actually leave with some semblance of understanding of the subject. 
No, not that one, he said covering her hand with his and pointing out the 
correct illustration in the book. 
She pulled her hand away suddenly before she could even think it through. She 
knew hed noticed; there was really no way he couldnt have. She refused to look 
up to see his expression. He was undoubtedly insulted or perhaps confused that 
she didnt want him to touch her.
It wasnt anything so simple as that. Just then his touch had sparked a memory. 
Endymions touch had always made her shiver; he was both gentle and rough all at 
once. Heshed promised not to think about him anymore.
She returned her attention to the book before her; or rather she tried. She 
couldnt seem to focus.
I dont understand, she said for the third time. She could sense the effort it 
was taking him not to get frustrated as he tried to explain how to name carbon 
compounds for the third time. 
He sighed and put down the pen he held in his hand.  Theres something else on 
your mind besides studying. Care to share?
She pressed her lips tightly together and shook her head. No. Id just really 
like to get through this. She stared down at the textbook, not even seeing the 
multitude of words and formulas. She had never felt this confused and out of 
sync in her life. Everyday it got worse and she was actually beginning to think 
that maybe Rei was right, that maybe she did miss him.
 But it wasnt relevant anymore. 
Usagi?
She looked up at him questioning. 
I know we just met but Id really like to get to know you better. If theres 
something bothering you, you can tell me. 
Usagi looked up at him for a moment, staring into his eyes. He looked so much 
like Mael but she couldnt remember seeing this kind of caring and concern in 
her ex-fiances eyes. 
Usagi looked down at her fingers. I dont want to insult you but I dont feel 
comfortable telling you my problems yet.
He smiled in understanding and she was surprised at just how considerate he was. 

She looked down at her watch. She hadnt realized so much time had passed since 
theyd been here. If she didnt hurry, shed be late for dinner. 
You have to go? he guessed.
Yeah, time for dinner soon. I didnt realize wed been here so long. I really 
appreciate your help. Maybe if she rushed out of here he wouldnt have a chance 
to ask her out. She grabbed her books and papers and began shoving them into her 
bag. He handed her the books scattered over the table.
Usagi
Damn it! She wasnt going to be fast enough.
Would you like to go out with me some time?
She took a good look at him, examining the beauty of his features and sincerity 
of his eyes, now a dark green in the subdued lighting, and knew that she would 
say yes. The strange part was that it wasnt because she sensed any sort of 
budding feelings for him. He was attractive but she couldnt see herself being 
with him at any point in her future. She would say yes because this seemed like 
the thing to do. There was no better way to rid ones self of a nagging thought 
than replacing it with another. In her mind she pushed Endymions image aside 
and pictured Hisahikos face.
It was strange. Hadnt she tried to do this same thing so long ago, concentrate 
on this same face? The difference was where Maels eyes had always been 
passionless and bland, Hisahikos were concerned and happy. Were they really so 
different or was it a separation she created in her mind to deny the idea that 
she might actually be falling into the same trap she had the first time around? 
Her instincts said differently though. 
Even if this were Maels reincarnation it didnt make him the same person. The 
Mael shed known had been a product of circumstance and environment. Besides, 
this time she wasnt blind, and she had a choice, and no intention of taking 
this any further than she could control absolutely.   
Sure, she replied simply. It was such a simple answer, such a short reply to 
such a meaningful question. She supposed the toughest questions always seemed to 
have the simplest of answers.
How about Friday? he asked.
She didnt even bother to come up with an excuse and she had been preparing a 
dozen mentally.
Ok.
They walked out of the library quietly together, stopping in front of the large 
building. 
Well Im going in the opposite direction, he announced and for a moment he 
just stood there looking at her intently. Good luck on your test tomorrow, he 
wished finally.
To Usagis surprise he leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. She was frozen 
in her state of shock simply staring at him as he walked away waving at her. 
***
 
The entire week seemed a countdown to Friday. She agonized over the little 
things mentally. What would she wear? What would she do if and when he wanted to 
kiss her? 
It was amazing to her that with the thoughts occupying her mind she managed to 
completely dismiss the feeling of uncertainty about whether shed passed her 
test or not. After the exam she had not felt the familiar sensation of having 
failed disastrously but she was afraid of being optimistic. Why court 
disappointment? 
Hisahiko had called to find out how she did and she had actually spent a 
comfortable half hour on the phone talking to him. It hadnt been an important 
discussion or a deeply personal one, just chatter. When shed eventually hung up 
she couldnt help but feel a little bit of guilt. Was she leading him to believe 
she was honestly more interested than she was? Was this even the right thing to 
do?
On something of an up side however, with Fridays date on her mind she had 
managed to limit all thoughts of Him to a bare minimum. In fact, completely 
involuntarily, Hisahikos image popped up in her head. Of course He still 
remained a needling thought in the back of her mind and the ultimate cause of 
her lack of sleep. Everyday was a mental battle, trying to determine why she 
just couldnt let him go.
***
Friday morning arrived and although shed gone to bed early in an attempt to get 
as much sleep as she possibly could to prepare for later, she still awoke with 
the same weariness that she had every morning recently. This morning was only 
different in that shed woken in the middle of the night racked with sobs. She 
had been momentarily terrified by the thoughts that had resulted in her tears 
but eventually her tears had worn her out and shed fallen asleep once more. 
She had time; or rather she made time, to contemplate the meaning behind the 
awful dream that had awoken her in the night while in the middle of her math 
class. She was too mentally distracted to pay any attention to Mitchell and her 
mood was somber. 
She only vaguely remembered details from parts of the dream Unfortunately all 
the important parts of it remained fresh in her mind. 
It had been the end of the world, as far shed known. Everything had been black 
with death and blood stained and her own moment had come. It had finally been 
her turn to join her friends and countrymen in the finale of deaths dance. 
Beryl had taken pleasure in confronting her personally. Perhaps feeling the 
steel blade in her hands as it slid into the flesh of her victim would be more 
satisfying than merely ripping her apart with energy. At the very last minute 
however, Endymion had arrived, placing himself in the precarious position 
between her and Beryls blade.
Hed offered himself up in exchange for her life. She could still hear the 
sickening sound of Beryls laughter that seemed to shake her very bones. Beryl 
hadnt considered the Earths Prince of much value because shed slid the sword 
through his side and into the heart of the Princess standing behind him. 
She could still remember the sound of the sword as it was pulled from her body 
and his. The sound announced her death and the last thing she saw was Endymions 
terror-filled blue eye staring down into hers with horror as the dark shadows 
crept in. There had been something in his eyes that had comforted her for a 
brief moment; something that terrified her now that she was awake.
He loved her.
 
