A fan fic by Caleyndar.
Rating: PG.

Notes: This marks the end of Part Three: Faces of War... I 
can not say I expected this twist I have taken, and I 
certainly did not plan on it. Never the less, the next 
chapter will be the first of Part Four: Angel of Tears...
	To the readers, thanks for writing. Please, if you
have any questions or comments, please send them to:
<caleyndar@tac.com.au>.
	Also, I thank those who have helped me with this 
chapter (Y.L.), for I found this a very difficult chapter 
to write. 
	And please, visit my web site:
http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Portal/5907/

Disclaimer: None of the characters belong to me: only the 
few I make up. The story, however, is mine.


The Name Endymion...

Part Three: Faces of War...

Chapter Seven...

	So I came to a point in my life where I decided to 
take charge of the one thing that should truly belong to me. 
Saying such a thing sounds very simple and almost trivial, 
but in reality, it couldnt have been further from the truth. 
In a way, it was perhaps the most frightening thing I had 
ever done. More so than facing the daemons from Hell, than 
being locked in eternal darkness and nothingness. Because
after this, any wrongs that came into my life would be 
entirely my fault. There would be no one to tell me what to 
do, what was right or wrong. And though it sounded wonderful, 
I was indeed very afraid of it, of being so utterly 
independent and alone.
	The bright flash of white light faded, and stone 
walls enclosed us, a tomb for the undead. We stood alone in 
the audience hall of my Fathers palace, in front of his 
stone skull throne. He lounged in it, uncaring, he face dark 
and cold, all amusement gone from his ever sneering face. 
Armand stood beside him, which explained why I stood now 
before my Father. The powers of teleportation had its
disadvantages. You may be able to pinpoint ones presence 
anywhere in the universe, but you could not fore see your 
destination. One travelled along the road without a map when 
one teleported. 
	"You have betrayed me, Endymion," he said, his voice 
full of anger. Still, he did not stand up. As if I was not 
worth the effort. "Not only did you not kill Serenity, you 
saved her life."
	I glared at him, even as I desperately tried to 
restrained myself from charging up to him and tearing out 
his throat. "That is enough," I said in a tight, barely 
controlled voice. "I came here not to speak with you. Armand 
and I have some things we must talk about."
	"Be silent! You have no right to tell me what to do, 
you pathetic excuse for a son! You can not even do the simple 
task I have set for you! Is taking a life so hard?" he 
demanded, slamming his fist down on the arm rest of his 
black stone throne.
	"Dare you to call me a son!" I roared back at him, 
my temper lost into the ocean of swirling emotions. "How can 
you call me your son after you ordered me to kill an innocent 
girl! You are the pathetic excuse for a Father! I am only 
what you have twisted me into!"
	He narrowed he deep blue eyes at me and stood up, 
his cape billowing behind him as he descended the steps to 
stand level with me. Armand stayed where he stood, silent, 
his expression blank. My generals had backed away, and stood 
in front of the double stone doors. 
	"And what a poor job I have done even of that," he 
said icily. "I should have expected nothing else, though. 
You are weak, like your Mother. And she betrayed me too."
	"Dont bring my Mother into this! Do not bring a 
stranger into this argument! This is between you and me," I 
yelled, my hands clutched into fists by my side. Physically, 
I was shaking, and all I could do was not lift my hand to 
him now and slam my fist into his glaring face. "And I am 
not weak. Do you call love weakness? Do you except me to 
destroy the only bright light in my life? Do you except me 
to live in eternal suffering for you sake? You who cares 
nought for me except my powers, you who used me because you 
wished not to do your own dark and evil deeds. You! You can 
call me weak?"
	He smiled evilly at me. "Love is weakness. And you 
are weak. I was once like you. I loved your Mother in 
another time. But I learnt that love, those emotions of 
light, makes you weak and venerable. Just as you are now, 
Endymion. And you are right. I care nothing for you except 
your powers. That is all you are to me. A tool to be used 
and thrown away," he said. "And you are very close to being 
burnt like the trash you are, my dear son."
	Tears stung my eyes. Why did they form, my tears? 
Did it really matter to me what he, my Father, thought of me? 
Was his praise so necessary to me that salt water came to my 
eyes now when he said I was nothing to him, that I was 
worthless? 
	But why now? Why did I care now, when a year ago I 
had no concerns whether he loved and cared for me or not? He 
had meant nothing to me then, so why must he mean the world 
to me now?
	Because, Endymion, your soul was darkened then. 
The Darkness always blocks out the Light, and so it is with 
human emotions. But now, your humanity is your's once more, 
and you are all too human, Armands telepathic voice said 
to me softly.
	I dared not look up at him, fearful of what my all 
too human emotions would make me do. But he was right. He 
told the truth this time. My hearts of hearts told me it was 
so. I had never known my natural parents when I was on Earth, 
and though I had considered the family there who had taken me 
in as my kindred, knowing that they were not of my blood 
formed a wall between myself and them. Their love was never 
the same as the love given to ones natural child. And that 
was what I wanted, I realised as I stood with those cold 
stone walls enclosing me. I wanted to know that those who 
had created me were proud of me. Perhaps that was one of the 
reasons also why I had almost done what Ares had ordered me 
to do. To please him, even though some where deep inside that 
dark soul of mine, I knew that I would never hurt the Angel 
of my Heaven.
	Yet he hated me. He considered me as nothing now but 
an obstacle between him and his road to glory. Greed, that 
inhuman want! Why did it always come into my life? And why 
should I not kill this man standing before me now? He was no 
longer my Father! He never was! He, whose soul was more ugly 
than his stone gargoyles which guarded the twin stair cases, 
whose heart was a blackened lump encased in his unfeeling 
flesh and hard armour. He, who would dare demand me to weed 
out from this universe the only rose I have even seen to be 
beautiful and full of such serenity!
	I lifted my face, my teeth clenched together so 
tightly my jaws ached. My midnight blue eyes so filled with 
hatred and anger locked onto his cold glaring deep blue ones. 
I could feel my entire body raging with this pure hate, this 
destroyer of humanity. Slowly, my entire form took on a glow 
of blue energy as my rage turned into energy.
	"Do you dare strike against me?" Ares asked coolly. 
"I dont think so. You are too weak for even that. You and 
your love. Youre just like your Mother."
	My nails cut into my palms, so tightly were my hands 
clenched into fists. The allurer around me grew brighter. I 
shut my eyes. Dont feel the anger, dont feel anything! 
This beast was only trying to hurt me. Dont give in! Blood 
trickled through my fingers and splattered with soft sounds 
on the stone ground. Blood again, here, within these stone 
walls. Make me bled, make me hurt. Is this your reason for 
living, Father of Lies?
	No more! I will take no more! 
	My eyes flew wide open, burning molten blue. Like 
blazing stars, my hands flew up, filled with my anger, my 
pain, my suffering. All the emotion of a boy who had seen too 
much, believed too much, and had known too little. And all 
that power gathered to my hands, and left them with such 
power I was knocked back, flying into my generals, bowling 
them over as my arms were thrown out by the force. 
	The blue blast slammed into my Father, but never 
touched him. Instead, my own power rebounded off an 
invisible shield and blazed back towards myself. 
	The blue light washed over me, poured in an 
overwhelming stream of pain, of anger. Screams assaulted my 
ears, nails dug into my skin, fingers pulled at my hair. 
Tortured souls, desperately trying to drag me into Hell to 
suffer with them.
	Like the darkness of the night at sun rise, when the 
warmth of that golden globe washes over the cold and distant 
lands, the whirlwind of my emotions came to an end, dying as 
weak spirits die when called on to leave by a powerful 
sorcerer. Without the powerful force to pin me to the immense 
stone doors, I fell forward, onto my knees, and then laid my 
head against the cold stone floor, all life seeping out of 
me, my apparent will to live.
	My generals rose to their weary feet, facing my 
angered Father as if he was the Devil Himself. Did he have 
black wings that towered over all, so very fearfully? 
	He glared at the four of them, seemingly 
disappointed in them as he was with myself. They stood in a 
perfectly straight line as my Father walked up to them. His 
eyes coloured like the raging oceans displayed great 
displeasure and wrath. His dominant figure came to a halt in 
front of Kunzite, and without warning, he lifted his all 
powerful fist and struck him across the face. His jewels 
rings gracing that hand left bloody trails across his once 
perfect face. 
	"You disappoint me, Kunzite. You have failed me, and 
you know how much I despise failure," my Father said once 
Kunzite had stopped reeling from the blow. "Do you forget, 
High General, the reason why I placed you and the other 
generals with my deplorable son? Your job was to finish his
mission if his weak soul could not!" He turned away briefly, 
as if too disgusted to continue. His face was contorted into 
an evil mask when he turned around again. This time, his 
words were for me. 
	"It was too much to ask for, was it not, when I 
wished for a son who would fight with me? One who would do as 
I asked and destroy my enemies?" he pretended to ponder. "Ah, 
well, its what I get for making a child for power," he 
laughed cruelly, his eyes narrowing as he ceased and looked 
at my turned head lying on the stone floor. 
	Did I feel something when his words cut into me? 
Only a far away throbbing. For I no longer lingered in my 
body bound in my silver armour and covered with my tattered 
black and red cape. Else where I floated, watching this from 
a far. His only intent to harm, mine only to have a moment 
of peace, surrounded by everything I loved, and those I 
loved.
	Silently, almost carelessly, I watched as my Father 
walked over to my blankly staring body and crouch down 
beside my lifeless head. "Yes, Endymion, you were created 
neither by accident nor out of love. Rest assure though, 
that your Dearest Mother thought it was for the latter. I 
was not cruel enough to hurt her then," he smiled. "But you, 
Endymion. You were created because I knew that with the
combined blood from both myself and your Mother, your power 
would be very, very great.
	"What a pity you received your Mothers conscience 
too. And her love. And everything else that made her weak 
when she had the power to rule this galaxy. As if that was 
not bad enough, my son turns against me and falls in love 
with my enemys daughter! Well, seeing you suffer makes up 
for some of it!" he laughed, and stood up and picked my limp 
body from the floor with his powerful mental grip.
	"My Lord, what do you mean to do with him!" Kunzite 
exclaimed, breaking from his silence after my Father had 
struck him. The dull red blood had ran down his cheek and 
neck, staining his grey uniform and some of his silver white 
hair that fallen over his shoulder.
	"Silence, General Kunzite! I am placing you under my 
command again, if you must know," my Father snapped, raising 
his hand to move my body over to where his black skull throne 
sat, guarded by the rearing unicorn and roaring stone lion. 
Slowly, without sound, my seemingly lifeless body positioned
itself over the unicorn, above its shape stone horn.
	All four of my generals started as they realised 
what their King meant to do. 
	"King Ares, you can not! Do you forget he is your 
son? He is your blood!" Jadeite yelled.
	"He who is so weak is no son of mine, and there is 
no point in keeping something worthless around. The four of 
you for him is a more than fair trade. Once he is dead, the 
Blood Bond will be broken. You will have no loyalty to him 
any longer. And once again, you will be my commanding
generals," Ares answered.
	My eyes drifted off my Father and my own limp body 
to the one who stood below it, looking with wide brown eyes 
at the already dead flesh above the unicorn. He looked 
frustrated, as if this was not what he had planned, not what 
he had wanted. What did he want? Little angel, little devil, 
my Innocent Child, what have you in your mind? Some sinister 
plan only your clever mind could comprehend? A plan so 
twisted only you with your innocence would want to it work? 
And that plan needed me alive, did it not? For now, at least.
	Ares released my body, and I began the plummet to be 
impaled apon the stone horn pointing towards the Heavens. My 
generals rushed forwards, disbelieving, and Armand just 
stared.
	A burning pain around my disembodied spirit snatched 
me from my thoughts and threw me back into my floating body. 
Whose doing was this! A scream erupted from my throat, and my 
dull half closed eyes widened as my own powers took over my 
body.
	The wind rushing past me died as my body came to a 
halt inches above the horn. My body righted itself until it 
seemed I stood on the air. But I did not command any of this! 
Then the crystal sabre appeared, and my hand closed over it. 
My eyes narrowed and my expression darkened, storm clouds 
passing over the sun. 
	With a predators roar, my body flew towards my 
Father, the weapon igniting as the distance closed between 
us, a weapon to bring justice for all the crimes he had 
committed against me. 
	Time seemed to slow, and I saw everything in the 
finest detail. My Fathers surprised expression and complete 
shock, his blue eyes so like my own widening. And my own arms, 
pulling back, and my mouth opened as if to tear the flesh 
off his very bones. 
	Blood spilled everywhere, splattering all over the 
stone floor, over my own armour and limbs, over my generals. 
The body fell forward, lifeless, so very much dead. And the 
final sickening sound of the severed head striking the 
ground, its skull splitting. 
	Silence fell. 
	My body became mine once more, and it began shaking 
violently. The crystal sabre fell from my hands, deactivating 
by itself before it hit, causing no damage. I lifted my hands 
to my face, staring at them, unbelieving what they had just 
done.
	And then my mouth opened and an endless scream 
forced its way forth from my raw throat. My hands pressed 
themselves against my ears and I just screamed and screamed, 
staring at my Fathers headless body and rolling head. 
	"Did you ever love me?" My voice was shaking. So 
weak, so pathetic. Why did I care? 
	He back was to me, his hands on his hips. He seemed 
to be staring into a world I could not see, though a gateway 
not yet opened to me. "I do not understand you, nor any of 
those who have ever felt the warmth of the emotion love," 
he said, turning around to face me. In his hand he held a 
rose, just in bloom, the colour of blood. "Love does not 
exist to me, in my dark cold world. It withers and dies, 
like the petals of  wilting rose."
	And the rose in his hands turned black, the petals 
falling though space to land at his feet. 
	"Therefore, my son, I have never loved you, and I 
never will." He lifted his foot and crushed the petals into 
a fine power, and then turned around and left though the 
darkness. 
	Kunzite was shaking me and he shouted at me to stop 
my senseless screaming. The others were dragging the body 
and the head from the chamber, hoping that the absence of 
them would bring to me some peace. A slap to my face stunned 
me into silence, and Kunzite let go of me to clutch his head
in pain. I fell to my knees, feeling so very weak. 
	"Why?" was the only word that formed in my mind that 
escaped through my mouth. "Did I hate him that much? God, 
Ive just killed a man! My Father!" I whispered, staring at 
the blood decorating the floor. "And why am I feeling so? He 
who meant to kill me, who has never loved me! Why do I even 
care!" I demanded to the empty space of the cavern. "Damn 
you, Angels! Damn everything. Take my bloodied soul!" I 
screamed like a madman.
	"Dont cry to the Angels nor to God, Endymion. They 
never listen, if they even existed," Armands soft voice 
cautioned me when none of my generals spoke.
	"Do not talk to me!" I shouted, eyes blazing with 
fury. At what? "You, whose name means Beloved of God! Do 
not speak to me! I want to hear no more of your lies!" My 
voice died on my lips, so the last words were hardly audible. 
"I want to die. I dont want this blood on my hands. My 
Father." I pressed my hands against my face, smearing his 
blood over them. Red, red, the colour of blood. 
	"And no one can forgive me for this," I whispered to 
myself. "Those who could would never. I want to go home. 
This never happened. I didnt kill him. I didnt kill my 
Father. And I am no Prince of any kingdom, and my name is 
Darien!"
	Peace, peace, where have you gone? Flown away apon 
the winds scattered by my inhuman actions. Someone, please, 
tell me it was alright, that everything was alright. And that 
it had all been a nightmare brought on by my constant pain 
and suffering.
	My soul, my spirit burning. I could not control my 
body. And the energy sabre, glowing brilliant blue as it 
burned through his flesh and blood, severing his head from 
his body. Those ocean blue eyes that reflected my own 
twisted face wide with shock. Never fear. Just shock. And 
then they had been forever blind. I could still smell the 
scent of his blood. All over my hands and attire.
	"Darien!" A voice I had not heard in what seemed 
like an eternity. But it had only been a few days. Nicolas. 
My friend, my innocent friend. And there was Dawn, looking 
at me with such joy. Oh, if only you knew what I had done!
	Nick embraced me, and I hugged him back. He blue 
eyes and golden locks were highlighted wonderfully by the 
scattered lights of the library. The place in which I had 
often sought peace and knowledge in the past two years. No 
more. I wanted to go home. 
	 "Please, sit down," I said, my voice already 
showing my weakness. "Ive asked my generals to bring you 
here because there is something which I think you need to 
know," I continued softly when they had both taken a seat. I 
dared not look into their trusting and believing eyes. I 
deserved no pity, much less compassion nor trust now. 
	And so I poured out my poisoned soul. Yes, I let 
them know of my dark side. I told them even of my failed 
attempts to kill Serenity, and her fear of me. Then I spoke 
of my Father. 
	And how I had killed him.
	My closest friends were quiet after that. I waited 
not for a reply, and continued.
	"So that is why I wish to leave. I can not stand the 
fact that I have killed my own Father, and that no one loves 
me. Serenity, my Dearest Serenity. She would never forgive 
me now! She would never stop fearing me. I murdered my own 
Father. The one who created me," I said softly, commanding
my voice to be clam, to never tremble. "And I want not any 
of this anymore! I want to be what I was! I want to be 
innocent again. If I can not have Serenity, then at least 
let me have my peace!"
	I fell silent. A tear fell from my eyes, landings 
with a gentle sound apon the varnished heavy oak table around 
which we sat. I dared not look at neither Nick nor Dawn to 
see their reaction. 
	It was Nick who finally spoke. "If you are asking 
for us to return to Earth with you," Nick began, only to be 
cut off by Dawn.
	"Then you shall be returning alone."
	Both Nick and I looked at her. I was surprised. 
Perhaps I had expected all along that she rather than Nick 
would want to return to Earth. This was the last thing I had 
expected. Had she hated me for what I had done, I would not 
have been so confused. But this? 
	"You are hurting now, are you not? You are ashamed 
of what you have done and you are also afraid, Darien. And 
all you want to do is run away. Run away from it all and 
hide behind what you know to be right," Dawn said softly, 
reaching across the table to touch my hand. "Perhaps it 
would do you good, if you did return to Earth. To be 
surrounded by those who will always love you. But you will
leave again, for your soul, your heart, knows you do not 
belong there. And when you return, Nick and I will be 
waiting for you."
	"I want to believe you, Dawn. That I would have 
cause to come back. But its clear that I am not needed here. 
My kingdom can run itself without me. My generals have made 
sure of that. And because Serenity fears me, I will not hurt 
her more by staying. I had wanted so very much to find out
the truth. The truth about everything. But I have not the 
strength now. Not after what I have done. Even to Armand I 
have not the determination to curse. As you say, I just want 
to run away from it all," I replied, my voice very tired. "I 
still can not believe I murdered my Father."
	"Darien, stop it! He was going to kill you, for 
Heavens sake! Surly you had to right to strike back in self 
defence!" Nick exclaimed, sick of hearing me curse myself. 
	I looked into his furious blue eyes. "Did I?" I 
asked. "Perhaps I had to right to defend myself, but not the 
right to kill my maker! And I did not mean to! My body just 
rushed at him," I trailed off. "I need time to think," I 
finally said. "And so Im leaving. You may or may not ever 
see me again. Pray that you do not. I seem to bring only 
pain and suffering to those around me."
	The chair was pushed back as I stood up to leave, 
wanting to say no goodbyes. What was the point? Goodbyes. 
One would only weep. And I had shed enough tears for one 
lifetime already. 
	"Darien, will your generals be going with you?" Dawn 
asked.
	I found the question unusual. She had no reason to 
be interested, but I replied. After all, she was one of my 
closest friends. "Yes. Unfortunately for them, they have not 
the choice. What makes it worse is that now my Father is 
dead, it would be so easy for them to see their loves, were 
it not for me." I smiled bitterly at that and left the 
library.
	Change. The summery of our existence. Change. Over 
the last few days, how much have I cried, shed those ever 
lasting tears? How much have I changed? I now knew my heart, 
I had lost the last of my innocence. Blood stained my soiled 
hands. 
	What did I seek, returning to Earth? To find my lost 
Innocence? To forget her? To forget all my duties, all my 
crimes? Those hideous mistakes. 
	Or perhaps I just wanted to find the Angel of Tears 
and ask that angel of might why I felt so much, why I have 
done all I have done, and how much have I yet to suffer for 
it. 
	Cry to Heaven, child, and ask of it the question 
which forever plagues you. 
	Why, why, why? 
	Who will listen? Will the Angels, will the Devils? 
Will whatever Gods and Goddesses exist have mercy apon this 
child? This damned soul? 
	Pain, suffering. Those things which forever love to 
torture me. You have won. Leave my legacy, leave my tears, 
leave my love. These are the things I will do. 
	Which I have done.

End of Part Three, Chapter Seven.

End of Part Three, period.

