caPtAin's eRecTIon 6" roUnd
thESe evEnTs chAngEd The lIfe of eVeryOne inVolveD

sober isn't ok ok? yeah yeah

"ThEy Got WoRSe aNd WorSE"- dOUblE QuoTE, tOny BlaIr on HiS WIFe's BloW JobS aND (AnOn) tokER, CHOrus 12 talKinG aBoUt haLLUCINations

" i gOt a feELing i'm noT tHe only onE" eminatES ouT of tHe Steel bUMs of HOrris. EveRyOne on MSN toLd mE to dRInk cRANberRy juiCe (see diagram #1). I persoNAlly sAw adVanTages in boTh tHat ANd aNOTher taSTy beVeraGe; snOT. ah YEs, it had BEen a LoNg daY piCKing sNot wITh an Old, rUSty, hypERderMic coMpass aND (18763926432894686) OCCASIONALLY GETTING A GOOd sCab. As tHe LatIns sAid - " FREnch footBAll pLAyers smELl anD theY Look liKe kINgs, liKe emperors". FU*K. 4 fu*KING daYS maROoNed on tHe ISland Of muM. "RoBSter MobsTEr"- iF i fUCkinG hEAr tHat oNe More TIme, iT's hYperdERMic NEedle lanD foR mE!

DIAGRAM
#1

"I received this warning when visitng the Tribes of Ninanoona. The people seemed friendly..."
CHAPTER B.

Cranberry Juice. the dreaded juice drink assorted with vitamins that plagued me from the MSN people...if THEY were really people.

WARNING: PRISON SEX

ben hawkes, renowned ------ --------. The logistics of an interstellar banana were vital when studying his goony smile

tHe loGIStics of AN InterSteLLar BaNaNa

"In the coming days, dazed and confused, I hallucinated. It was worse than a marijuana cigarette - a reefer" - Verse 12, THE BIBLE

adolF hTLer visits sTiCkmaN LaNd.

"I doN'T kNOw whAT's REAL anyMore.
I can still rely on Vodka ThouGH."

THE VERY TONSILS THAT PLAGUED ME, PREVENTED ME FROM THE SOCIAL EVENT OF THE YEAR (see diagram 12), BEGAN TO SPEAK.

"Four days" they said, "Four days since you've made contact with a real human bean". I gasped. Four days! No wonder I want good so feeling! The tonsils continued- "I'll do you a deal, we get to (fu*k the brains out of your ear) -TWO MEANINGS- and  you can see your friends"                                     

MY VERSION OF THE SOCIAL EVENT OF THE YEAR

B= beer
J= joint
B + J = BJ

HYPERdermic NEEdle

Diagram 12: ACTUAL SOCIAL EVENT OF THE YEAR
                   

"And thus concludes our journey into the mind of a young man, struck with fear, mass paranoia and hallucinations. Whether brought on by prescribed narcotics, prevention of contact with other human beans or a raging fever, we may never know. But rest safe in the knowedge that it was someone other than yourself who experienced this horrifying nightmare... Sweet dreams, Children"