'Sweet youth,
Tell me why, sad and sighing, thou dost rove
These pleasent realms? I pray thee speak me sooth
What is thy name?' He said, 'My name is Love.'
Then straight the first did turn himself to me
And cried, 'He lieth, for his name is Shame,
But I am Love, and I was wont to be
Alone in this fair garden, till he came
Unasked by night; I am true Love, I fill
The hearts of boy and girl with mutual flame.'
Then sighing, said the other, 'Have thy will,
I am the love that dare not speak its name.'


does anyone get the meaning?
i like this poem. :) this is an excerpt tho.
it's about homosexual love.
used in court in 19th century for some homosexual case.
:/
qte sad.. :/


"Two loves" Poem by Lord Alfred Douglas.

i dint know Oscar Wilde was gay.
and his partner was Douglas.
ahh. so cool. haha.
i like gays. but not transves.
or at least these were the charges against him i think..


this is Lord Alfred Douglas.
His father is a Marquess.
he's damn effeminate.
but qte not bad!! for a long dead guy. haha.

Some love too little, some too long,
Some sell, and others buy;
Some do the deed with many tears,
And some without a sigh:
For each man kills the thing he loves,
Yet each man does not die.

i'm feeling too studious ler.
feeling also, a lil too much like a certain someone
who acts smart.

heh. whatever..
i'm going bonkers

rock ya body :: 22:29

Congratulations! You have an understanding of the
goth culture!

A True Goth Quiz


why i did this quiz,
i won't ever know.. and somehow.
i have an understanding of goth culture!
like. er.. wahh, haha

rock ya body :: 19:51

my daddy's using 7250..
he's changing to 7250i.
i dunno why he change lor.
i mean. it's just the zoom camera thing.
:|

Wen.. you like the dress then go buy ba!!
but i dunno where you'll wear it to tho.
haha.
how much is it?

sian.
ydae night i couldnt slp til 5..
i felt like Wen..
as in. the sleeplessness.
couldnt sleep cus my throat's so damn sore.
kept coughing non-stop.
irritated.
my nose is bleeding too.
not bleeding in the sense like flowing out.
but my mucus when i sneeze is tinted red.
and there are like some hardened red bits.
sounds and looks damn sick la.

rock ya body :: 17:23

A- Age: 17

B- Boyfriend: dont have...

C- Chore you hate: i dont do chores.

D- Dads name: tiong aik? haha. like who wants ter know/

E- essential make up item: eyebrow pencil!

F- favourite actor: johnny depp. he's hot.

G- gold or silver: gold. silver.. is a lil crass.

H- hometown: sg.

I- instruments you play: recorder?! haha. i dunno..

J- job title: student...

K- Kids: what abt kids?.

L- Living arrangements: with my fam..

M- Mom's name: margaret

N- number of people u've slept with: haha. depends on the definition of slept with..

O- overnight hospital stays: ya. when i was a baby.

P- Phobia: bugs

Q- quote you like: .. umm i dunno.

R- regular drink: milo

S- secret crush: i dont have a crush. and this is pointless. i mean if its a SECRET crush. no one in the right mind would say it right.

T- time you wake up: afternoon

U- unique habit: err. i dont know what is unique.

V- vegetable you refuse to eat: i dont eat veg

W- worst habit: er. too many ter count

X- X-rays uve had: i nv had one

Y- yummy food you make: er. i cant make ath. i can cook tho.

Z- zodiac sign: scorpio



last kiss: err. loooong ago.

last good cry: quite long ago...

last library book checked out: er. very long ago too..

last crush: er. is dt considered a crush?

last phone call: er.. tht i made or received?? if its the last call i made. 2 days ago. ter wen. abt meeting time. if received think its a while ago. relative called

last tv show watched: err. spongebob. 2 days ago

last time showered: 2 hours ago

last shoes worn: er. my m)phosis ones. dont remem if its the slippers or flats.

last cd played: er. I Love You 2

last item bought: err. food i think

last downloaded: pan wei bo - ai shang wei lai de ni

last annoyance: with myself. and boredom

last thing written: by hand? dunno. prob when i wrote smth for my mom..

last sleep: last night 4am i think. make tht last morning//

last chatted with: er. online. wendy.

last sexual fantasy: err. i dont have them. even if i did. i think i won't say it. haha

last weird encounter: err. dont knoww.

last ice cream eaten: today. the walls one i think. y'know the new tub with hardened syrup and stuffs. named choco heaven or smth.

last time amused: when i read funny blog entries..

last time wanting to die: er. long ago.

last time in love: err. if i fell in love.

last time hugged: er. long ago..

last time scolded: my mom. ydae..

last chair sat in: i'm still sitting. in my armchair in front of the com. okay.. not really sitting. sorta sprawled on my chair and com table.

last shirt worn: er. nike golf polo tee. it's my newest PJ top. i like.!

last poster looked at: RotK.

last show attended: rugrats go wild.

rock ya body :: 01:00

[Slept in your bed] last person? me... and besides me, wen lor.
[Saw you cry] i'll assume its the last person for the rest of the qns la. umm no one i think. but lotsa people seen me cry..
[Made you cry] it was too long ago. i can remem lor.
[Spent the night at your house] wen.
[You went to the mall with] er. wen. okay. does it seem like an obsession? haha. it's not okay, i just dont feel very well so havent went out for 2 days. plus.. my hp.... :(
[Yelled at you] er. mom..
[Sent you an email] er. fridae. gay and lesbian network. haha.
[Said they were going to kill you] i dont think anyone wants ter kill me! i'm too perfect. haa.
[Dreamed something really crazy and then it happens the next day?] no.
[Stalked someone?] yes. usually someone who i cannot stand who's abt ter do smth stupid. or looks so ugly tht its funny. and i also stalk transves.. not very long tho. haha. all for the sake of entertaining myself. i'm perv right.
[Had a mud bath?] er. no. but i have mud soap!
[Wished you were the opposite sex?] hell yea.
[Had an imaginary friend?] hell no.
[Math or English?] math..
[What are you going to do after you finish this survey?] surf the net, blog more if i'm bored.
[What was the last food you ate?] er. dinner. i drank my 5th pack of milo tho.
[are you bored?] hell yea.
[How many buddies are on?] er. i dunno. 7 who i actually talk to i guess..
[Last noise you heard?] my cough....
[Last time you went out of the state?] er. last mth. went Aus.
[Lucky number?] i'm too unlucky to have a lucky number.
[Things you like in a girl/guy?] er. looks, style and qualities. mainly this 3 ba.
[Do you have a crush on someone] right now.. no.
[Do they know?] er. no.
[Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?] no..
[What do you think of Ouija boards?] er. sometimes they work.
[What book are you reading now?] er. archie comics.?
[What's on your mouse pad?] i have no mousepad..
[Favorite board game?] these qns seem damn familiar. checkers or smth.
[Favorite magazine?] her world i think..
[Favorite sound?] silence
[Worst feeling in the world?] fucked-up-ness..
[What is the first thing you think when you wake in the morning?] what kinda weird dream was tht.?!
[Do you like scary or exciting rollercoasters?] er. its only exciting when its scarey.
[How many rings before you answer?] depends
[Future daughter's name?] er. dunno. xiujuan jr. haha i dunno.
[Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?] er. yes. not just a. haha
[If you could have any job you wanted, what would it be] er. smth tht is damn easy, and i make tonnes of money frm it.
[Do you type with your fingers on the right keys?] no.
[What's under your bed?] dust, and one dollar..
[Favorite sport to watch] soccer..
[Did you have fun doing this] noo. but its okay la. better than having nothing to do.

i'm blogging helluva lot.

rock ya body :: 00:33

this is the most boring holiday i ever had.
i'm bored staying at home
i'm bored going out.
i'm bored with going on holidays.
i'm so damn bored la.
siann.

rock ya body :: 00:18

oh. read the Newpaper,
and Beckham is suppta be the sexiest man in the world alive
and George Clooney and Ben Affleck lead in the US.

am i really outdated.? cus somehow
i thot tht Brad Pitt was still sexiest.
haha.
and anw, Ben Affleck is ugly la..
really ugly. he grew so much uglier. why is he still sexy?!
and David Beckham's voice is so eeyucks.
how can that be sexy?!

also i think Orlando Bloom,
(or known as Legolas in LotR or Will in PotC)
looks like Beckham.

and what about Johnny Depp??
he's my current "swoonable" material..
and what about my "Lunchberg"?
in soccer, i think he's one of the hottest, if not the hottest.
too bad for me e's not a ManU player.
if not i can drooool like crazy.

J. Lo is the sexiest woman alive.
er. that one.. i dont really know why.
i think her butt is too big.
as in. not proportionate ter her breasts.

i think Kurt Cobain can be the sexiest man dead.
he is damned goodlooking.

there's a big hype over Van Nistlerooy's skills la.
i think he doesnt have much skill, nor flair.
i think Giggs is much better.
and the best striker in the EPL is indubtably(?) Henry.

I am getting so bored without school..
my brain is rotting
and i have nth left ter bitch abt.
that i'm discussing actors?!
i am exasperated beyond belief.

.. and i forgot how ter spell "indubtably"
see. my brain is rotting.

rock ya body :: 00:12

i'm irritated.
my mom's not gonna buy me a new hp.
she;s making me use my daddy's old hp,
and he's getting a new hp.

okay.
maybe not so very irritated.
cus his hp isn't some lansai hp.
and even if i could get a new hp,
i dunno what i want.
-sighs.

and i changed the template.
got the guestbook thing.
somewhat ripped off from Wen.
haha.
it's not just somewhat. it's alot ripped from Wen.
cus i'm too lazy ter do a proper job.
hehh.

my cough/cold is really bad..
hasn't been this bad since Pri sch.
as though i'm having TB like tht.
argh.
my throat is damn sore.

and i love Milo!
drank 4 packets today ler! :)

rock ya body :: 00:00

went town with Wen today.
damn bored.
anw. she cut her hair.
and its pretty bad.
she's got bangs too now.

had dinner at Crystal Jade,
dint do much today.

somehow feeling very bored with everything.
:|

rock ya body :: 22:50

Went Sentosa today.
With Wen, Sab, Neo, Kang, Chuns.
Qte okay la.
But I was sianned throughout..

Anw, i was cracking a lame joke.
which was not funny, because it was too lame,
at Wen's expense,
and Wen said,
"fuck you la."
and I went,
"I dont want to fuck you la."
and she said,
"I dont want you to fuck me either,
I want to fuck you."

again,
my lack of narrative skills
has made smth funny,
seem totally unfunny.

sighhh

rock ya body :: 22:55

1. What's your name? xiujuan. or gan siew kuen!
2. How old are you? 17.
3. Do you have any nickname? er. xiu/siew?
4. When is your first love? umm. last yr.
5. First kiss? sec1.. some dare kinda thing. wait. does the qn refer ter when or with who?
6. How tall are you? 173cm 5ft8
7. How many girl/boyfriends have u had? mmmm. i;ve got 1 gf.
8. Sour, spicy or sweet? spicy.. the questions are too vague man. i like spicy foods. and people too.
9. What would you do when you are free? umm. my com. but i dont think i'm really free. my waking hours are either spent gg out. or at the com.
10. Hobbies? well. i like ter bitch ard. and i also love ter laugh at un-smart persons.
11. Do you club? yepp.
12. Favourite magazine? her world i figure.
13. Are you a smoker? no..
14. Are you drinker? i think. so. i'm not addicted tho.
15. How much money will you bring when you are out? er. if i have less than 50. i'll bring it all. but if i have more money. i'd bring abt 80 or so.
16. Car, diamond or money? i want a bloody ferrari. i pretty much have the rest. okay. not so much money. but still.
17. What phone are you holding now? i fucking lost my hp..
18. Coffeebean or starbuck? coffeebean! i'm staying away frm coffee right now. for reasons unknown.
19. Where do you stay? braddell.
20. What is your favourite food? spicy... and prawn/lobster/crayfish type of seafoods.
21. How many siblings do you have? 2.
22. Chocolate, Sweet or cake? how abt a mudcake with french vanilla ice cream, topped with choc syrup.
23. Can your ears move? ya.
24. Do you dye your hair? ya/
25. What languages do you speak? eng cl.
26. How many phones in your house? 4.
27. How many toilets? 3
28. When you are doing your business in the toilet what would you do? reading.
29. Do you swim? ya.
30. Do you gamble? yeah.
31. What is your favoutite sport? not really sure...
32. Love,techno or classcial? umm. love. i hate techno. and classic bores me.
33. What is your favourite drink? umm. water right now.. my throat's throbbing
34. What is your temper? Low, middle, high? um. middle ter high. in tht range.
35. What kind of person you are? a normal one.? i dunno.
36. What would you wear when you go to bed? er. tshirt and shorts.
37. What is the 1st thing to do when you wake up? i look for my stuff toy ter hug.
38. Do you eat breakfast? no..
39. Favourite tv show? i dont watch tv much.. porb a cartoon.
40. Who you want to meet? er. johnny depp. he's real shuai. he took over ben affleck's shuainess ler. affleck looks fatter now..
41. What type of person you are? didnt this qn come up earlier.?
42. Where do you like to go? er. somewhere where i can be rid of stupid people.
43. Do you wear specs? nope. nor contacts.
44. When is your birthday? 15nov
45. Do you buy branded goods? yes.. all goods are branded. be it LV, Gucci or some obsolete lousy pasar malam brand.
46. How many hours do you spent talking on phone with someone? er. depends on the person. i like ter keep it short tho.
48. If a guy or a lady want to know you as a friend, would you give your number to them? if tht person is shuai or vv pretty. hell yeah.
49. Do you watched R(a) movies? ya many. i'm a perv.
50. One night stand? with?? i dont think so.

rock ya body :: 22:48

heard from the radio..

today is World Aids Day...
and prevention of Aids,
is as easy as ABC!

A for Abstinence from casual sex.
B is for Being Faithful to your partner
C is for Condoms. use condoms consistently!


have no real idea why i posted this.
haha.
seems kinda cute tho.

rock ya body :: 14:23

damn bored.
argh
ydae was a horrible day..
arghh,
man utd lost ter chelsea.
altho i knew it would end tht way
even before the game started
it still irked me ter no ends
when man utd lost.

still think the penalty was wrongly given.
chelsea deserved ter win.
but not thru tht penalty.
and if it wasnt for the penalty.
it would be a draw.
and man u wont be 4 points behind chelsea.
arghh.
i'm irritating myself.

Ranieri still said manu's better,
so act-humble.
argh.

woah.
i'm so soccer-ed up in this entry.
i want manu to win!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

rock ya body :: 13:24

i am super irritated.
i lost my hp today.
sucks.

anw. i hate my dad.
cus my mom was irritated and she started screaming.
and said she wont buy me a new hp.
okay. she always overreacts.
then my daddy came and act nice.
then aft tht, when he left
i heard my mom saying tht
its so irritating tht she has ter find time
ter buy me a new hp..
and then my dad said dont buy a new hp for me.
wtf.
i hate hypocrisy.

said i'm too spoilt. wtf.
i'm just spoilt okay.
there's a diff there.
you want too spoilt.
i can give you too spoilt.
chh.

anw. went out with wen today.
ter get her xt's present.
and. walked ard.
took corny pics at topshop tho.
cus we chose mostly ugly clothes for each oth.
right here...










somehow the clothes dont look as bad as they felt now..





i'm still damn irritated.
my bro left 4 or 5 hp in cabs.
my lil bro left 3 hps in the wash. within 3 mths of purchase..

i only lost 2 hps so far la.
and one got run over.
and i get screwed!?
when no one else does
wtf.

rock ya body :: 22:31

rugrats was cute!

aft tht we went ter sos.
it was okay la.
was slpy tho.

wen stayed over at my place.
but cldnt get ter slp..
and i cldnt slp well with someone sharing my bed..
i must get a king bed sometime soon huhh.

she left like at dawn.
yaa. really dawn..

i'm bored.. slpy too..

rock ya body :: 17:21

i'm damn bored.
Wen's coming over soon,
and then we'll go watch Rugrats!
yea rugrats!
with the wild thornberries.
donny is so cute!!! haha.

haha. i love nickelodean cartoons!!

:)

rock ya body :: 15:54

my mom wants ter tell Auntie Serene
(who is siewping's mom)
tht siewping is crked.
haha..
i'm persuading her ter not tell..
why go fuck up someone else's life..

:/

rock ya body :: 22:12

i was so bored tht
i simply got myself irritated again.

how can certain persons be so full of self-importance?!
that thought disgusts me.

arghh. really dread the next year.
i hafta make my choice soon. argg.



and to choose,
is to always leave someone or something behind...

rock ya body :: 20:11

Why did you have to leave me?



When you said that love will conquer all?



Why did you have to leave me?



When you said that dreaming was as good as reality?

rock ya body :: 19:40

1. My desktop shows: umm. a totally pink wallpaper with a guess model..
2. Book I'm reading: Lord Of The Rings: Return Of The King... all it has done so far, is making me feel like not watching the movie..
3. On my mouse pad: i dont use a mousepad??
4. Favorite board game: Checkers?
5. Favourite magazine: Her World? i dun really know...
6. Favorite smell: Givenchy Irresistable or smth. wanna get it..
7. Least favorite smell: shit.
8. Worst feeling in the world: depression..
9. Favorite sound: no sound at all.. i like silence
10. First thing I think of when I wake up in the morning: time?
11. Rings before I answer the phone: i try not ter answer it.. hopefully someone else will..
12. Favorite color: shades of red, and black and white..
13. Do I like my name?: its okay i think. ahha..
14. I was named after: err. god knows..
15. Favorite food: i like seafood... i like pasta, i like sandwiches, certain hams... so mb.. Ravioli Marinara with Turkey and Mushroom Foccacias??
16. Do I drive fast?: i cant drive YET..
17. Chocolate or vanilla?: choc
18. Worst disaster I fear: .... i dunno.
19. Storms, cool or scary?: err. its just irritating.
20. My first car: ... my first car would prob be smth cheap. and then i'll save up for an expensive one! :)
21. Dead or alive, I would like to meet: er... i have no idea.. prob JFK, find out whats the big hype abt him.. like. so what if he was the first prez ter get assasinated in office, or smth.
22. Zodiac sign: scorpio.
23. Favorite drink: ..dunno.. diary stuffs. i like milk.
24. Favorite vegetable: i hate vege. prob long beans french beans or smth..
25. If I could have any job, it would be: tai-tai..
26. Hair, long or short: not too long, not too short..?
27. Times I've been in love: mmm. depends on the definition... prob once. or none..
28. Glass, half-empty or half-full: i dunno now.. i usually say fill up the cup when its half empty or full....
29. Do I type with my fingers over the right keys?: nahh
30. Favorite movie: POC. i think. haha. watched it 3 and a half times...
31. What's under my bed?: dust.
32. Lucky number: i like 31..
33. Favorite sport to watch: soccer.
34. PC or Mac: PC
35. On my nightstand: umm is tht a sidetable thing? i've got a hi-fi tht tks up half the space, chargers, md, lamp..
36. Pillows on my bed: 2 pillows, 2 cushions, a bolster? many stuffed animals.
37. In case of fire, I'll take: a fire extinguisher..
38. I admire: err. i dunno.
39. Best thing ever invented: aircon! :) and heater tooo.
40. Most influential person: in sg? LKY..
41. Favorite place(s): my room! tho its dirty, messy, used ter be really smelly. but i love it all the same! :)
42. Do I say my prayers?: nahhhhhhh
43. Minutes I spend in the shower: depends on how rushed i am..
44. Most prized possession: have no idea...
45. My best asset: err. i dunno... i like my feet tho. haha.
46. Jewelry I wear: right now? a ear stud and 2 dangly things, my omnipresent chain..
47. Coke or Pepsi: cherry coke! altho i dunno why everyone hates it..
48. What I had for breakfast: i had.. nth?
49. Favorite time of the year: hols.
50. If I were a cartoon character, I would be: sinbad! frm the movie. cus it looks so fun swinging on all the vines. :)

rock ya body :: 11:23

Went shopping with Chrys today..
We bot tops frm Zara.
Walked a lil,
and came home.

Dint so Sentosa with Wen cus...
her buddy class are really really. er. loser.?
haha. cept for one person la. :|

rock ya body :: 19:37

oh ya.
in aussie,
Rugby is huge.
so anw.
i watched bits of the finals.
and i think Johnny Wilkinson or smth like tht
the Eng player.
is qte cute.
haha. yes.

rock ya body :: 01:16

ooh Wen
i missed ya too!
vv sianned.
no one ter shop with me in Aussie. haah

rock ya body :: 01:11

woohoo!
I'm back in sg.
like finally.
i missed my bed tonnes!!!
the bed in the hotel i stayed in was a SINGLE bed.
not even supersingle. sigh.
and it was like. slping on wood.
i love my bed.! :)

i'm irritated.
spent i think 80+ for presents back.
then i realised.
tht the stuffs i bot..
were not really souveniers.
ER. i felt real dumb aft tht,
and. i bot chocolates for Cand.
really really cute chocolates tht are heavenly,
and i squashed them.
argh.

the weather was cold while i was there.
this morning,
when i was still there, it was warm.
so i think i'm damn unlucky,
tht i got all the cold weather.

the interesting thing was,
i went ter Philip Island ter see the Penguin Parade,
and i saw penguins having sex.
haha. qte cute/
they'll honk alot just before the do it,
then they're terribly silent when they have sex.

the aeroplane trips were good too.
watched 5 movies i think.
Hollywood Homicide,
American Wedding,
Bad Boys II,
Uptown Girls,
Pirates of the Carribean,
and Sinbad!

oops. tht was six.

shall blog more next time.
haha.
and i met Sara. ya.

Oh ya,
i love Australia,
cus i think Australians make me look
damn damn slim.
cus they're all so so so fat. :)

rock ya body :: 00:57