30 - The Guru Syndrome

To become conscious of inner contradictions, he must perforce act out the conflict and be torn into opposite halves. C. G.  Jung

There is a pair of opposites in all things; in each there exists the spirit of the opposite.Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan

 I am at the midst of my true life; I am most deeply myself. C. G.  Jung  

What we are looking for is a human spirit. The personality is the fruit on the tree of life. Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan

It has become clear to me that, because I have been emphasizing the idyllic dimension of people and the environment while underplaying the 'shadow,' mureeds have been lulled into a highfaluted image of themselves and of myself which matches neither the reality of their being nor of mine and brooks contradictions in how they handle situations.

The ideal is the means, but its breaking is the goal. Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan

Here, my own idealistic temperament carries over into others, for one thing because my ideal of the sublime mirrors an archetype and aspiration latent and pressing as a nostalgia in those coming to me for spiritual nourishment, and furthermore, because of the impact that the 'guru image' has on those in contact with him/her. Nourishing this splendid dimension is so important for so many people in helping them to overcome their disenchantment in the sordidness of much of our society and to overcome their inadequate self-image. But if one fails to make the connection between this level of reality and the existential conditions, one runs the risk of escaping from real situations into wishful thinking, also thinking of oneself as special, whereas everyone is special in his/her own way.

Great people have great faults; it is their greatness that is their greatest fault.Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan

Living up to that image to nurture the need of the guru image in people forces me, (although I have consistently disavowed such an auspicious status) and indeed all those in a leadership position, into a role in which one runs the danger of neglecting to confront one's own defects and weaknesses or inadequacies. Because of a pupil's awe in the face of the aura of eminence of the guru, it is sometimes difficult to unmask the justifying faculty of the mind resorted to by a person who is looked upon as an example. The arguments offered often scramble the issue by flaunting contradictions, ascribing them for example, to the "reconciliation of the irreconcilables" instead of striking a balance between clearly defined choices. This is a typical guru syndrome which we are witnessing in our time:  masking contradictions, instead of recognizing their incongruity and correcting them.

Those who try to make virtues out of their faults grope further and further into darkness. The way to overcome error is first to admit one's fault, and next to refrain from repeating it.Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan

The consequence of masking contradictions is the conflict and confusion that these ambiguities arouse in oneself and in others. Since in the drama of real life one senses how important the image is for people "out there", those in a leadership position fear that, should they admit criticism, they would spoil that image. However, by justifying oneself, one deprives oneself of the opportunity of ever progressing. The image cannot hold long unless matched by the reality of one's personality, so that in the end, one's scruple to uphold one's image to help people defeats its own end.

It is no use trying to prove what you are not. If you begin at the end, you will end at the beginning.Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan

Anybody volunteering to embody the archetype representing people's higher self will have to choose between artfully concealing one's shadow, and when discovered, stand on one's high horse, justifying it hypocritically, or alternatively, by putting oneself on the line, be open to be exposed to scrutiny and criticism by all. Should one have the honesty and courage to confront one's shortcomings, one will, in addition, better understand people's problems through seeing oneself in others and others in oneself, thus affording real help to those who also need to transmute their shadow. Clearly, how could one expect to help another if one has not experienced their problems oneself and dealt with them constructively?

You discover your own faults in the faults of others.Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan

By justifying oneself, one blunts one's ability to earmark one's defects.

All impulses originate in the divine impulse but get limited and distorted in man.Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan

The human personality acts as a lens distorting the divine impulse. For example, wrath facing injustice gets distorted as hatred, or mastery as an ego trip; love as possessiveness or nobility as vanity; compassion as indulgence, condoning, or truth as callousness; cautious responsibility as fear or timorousness. If one is not extremely scrupulous about being honest to oneself, one tends to fail to recognize this distortion and firmly believes that one is acting under the higher impulse.

Our personality acts as a lens, distorting our divine inheritance, as in the picture of Dorian Gray. However, this distortion can be redressed by confronting it with its archetype, just like light distorted by a concave lens can be reconstituted to its original pattern by a convex lens. Caruso's voice distorted by the recording machines can be restored to its original beauty just as if we were able to reverse the arrow of time. Even so, our divine nature, suffering from defilement like a distorted exemplar of a perfect archetype, can be reinstated in its pristine glory.

This requires one to match a divine quality latent in divine inheritance with its distortion in our personality without slipping into a guilt complex or a state of despondent self-denigration. The role played by the ideal becomes evident when one realizes that one cannot compensate for the distortion we have inflicted upon our divine inheritance without referring back to the divine model. Conversely, the ideal can only be known in and by means of its exemplification which is perforce distorted.

It is only if one is able to recognize one's inadequacies as a distortion of that very ideal to which one pays lip-service that this ideal can operate in transmuting the 'shadow,' thereby realizing the divine legacy in our being so that it may become a reality in our personality. To know what one's defects are, all one needs is to recognize one's qualities and earmark the distortions of those qualities in one's personality. It is this very distortion of a quality that stands as an obstacle to developing that very quality. Should one fail to admit and confront the defect, that very defect will, by the synchronistic interplay in our relationships with people, call a situation in which we are placed before the choice either of applying the defective idiosyncrasy in handling the situation, or the divine quality of which the former was a distortion.

Pir-O-Murshid was very aware of the hazards of the transference syndrome and warned people about role playing.

Every soul has its own way of life; if you wish to follow another's way, you must borrow his eyes to see.Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan

A further disadvantage of the guru image strikes clearly:  if mureeds or representatives think of me as the image they have projected upon me rather than the real person, they run the risk of going wrong if they assume that my advice is absolute.

Do not take the example of another as an excuse for your wrongdoing. One should take oneself to task instead of putting one's fault upon another. Overlook the greatest fault of another, but do not partake of it in the smallest degree.Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan

Much as I make it clear that neither I or the representatives are entitled to give advice to mureeds as to what to do, some still try to read, in the inflections of my voice, how I feel about a situation. Failing this, they think that, assuming I must have higher guidance, that they need to try to capture this guidance, whereas they run the risk of wishful thinking!

Representatives, particularly, and those active in spreading the message tend to model themselves upon my own life pattern which is practically 99% dedicated to service at the cost of my private life. In this instance, genetic traces of my atavistic ancestry of sannyasins and dervishes and my own temperament that prioritizes service above anything else sets a challenge that people tend to emulate. Here once more, the guru transference image acts adversely, though I warn people not to consider me as a guru or even as an example. People get burnt out, while I go on striding ahead apparently unscathed. This accounts for many representatives handing in their resignations because of being increasingly aware of the stress incurred by accumulating the responsibility of service with the need of matching up their job and the care of their families.

In as much as I am fully aware of this issue in my life, my choice is involved. Assuredly I am becoming increasingly sensitive to the need for balance here, yet I must follow my conscience.

The way you choose is the way for you.Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan

Pir-o-Murshid saw the need for people to give some satisfaction to their personal emotions. In the foregoing, the wisdom of Pir-o-Murshid comes through with clear evidence:

Balance is the keynote of spiritual attainment. A virtue carried too far may become a sin. The fulfillment of life is by being human.Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan

Had Christ not already warned: Give to Caesar what belongs to Caesar and to God what belongs to God.

Pir-o-Murshid gave space to people's need for love, for recognition, for self-esteem, for fulfillment in achievement, for security while equally giving satisfaction to the need for ecstasy, for freedom, for glorification, for the discovery of the divine in one, for sacredness:

He who can live up to this ideal is the king of life. Devotion is proved by sacrifice.Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan

I have to shatter your image of me so that I may make my ideal a reality and you will have to shatter it also, and what is more, any replication of that image in you, especially if a representative or coordinator in The Sufi Order. Since we are so inextricably intermeshed I will have to recognize myself in both your ideal and your idiosyncrasies, as you may recognize yourself in my ideal and in my failures without the screen of your image of me or my image of you confusing the issue.

May our ideals resonate like the multiple projections of mirrors placed face to face, cross-pollinating each other, while we strive in our interconnectedness to make these ideals a reality in our lives so that restored to their pristine splendor, our ideals may fertilize our personalities.
