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;.l2,15,75,192,2,20,25,127,15,0,
;.l3,20,75,192,2,25,127,20,0,
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;.l7,17,124,192,2,34,127,17,2,
=sh931226
START INPUT OF TGG MS.
l6
Transcribed from copy of Yakar tapes by: Tamar Goshen Gottstein, 24 Shimson,Baaka, Jerusalem 93501; Tel: 02-734560
Input from transcript: sa apr. 19 Jan. 1995
Proofed against tape:
Notes (sa) previously input =sh1293yk
Seminar was held at Yakar, Dec. 26-29, 1993
Introduction to those notes follows:

Audio tapes available from Yakar, 10 HaLamed-He, Katamon, Jerusalem; 
     Tel:  972-2-612310; FAX: 972-2-632917
Videotape available from Natanel Shur, Bet El B, D.N. _______ , Israel
     Telephone:  972-2-975280 
Congregation Kehilat Jacob, 308 W. 79th St., New York NY 10024, USA;
TOPIC:  The Seminar was titled, by Yakar, "Everyone talks about Peace, but noone knows the melody" (a quote from R. Shlomo, although not selected by him forthis seminar.)
The Seminar, in English, consisted of 4 apr. 2-hour lectures by R. Shlomo, inEnglish; these are available, unedited, on tape.
An editted videotape is available, as noted above.
TEXT:  The primary text used was sayings by R. Nachman (1792--1810),posthumously compiled by R. Nathan as Likutei Maharn; and re-arranged by topicas Likutei Etzot, which has been translated into English and published by theBratslav Institute (Jerusalem) as Advice.  Mimi Feigelson notes that R. Nachmantaught in Yiddish, but his works (except for the stories) were written inHebrew.
Topics covered were 'Peace' and 'Anger' from Volume 4, p169, ; R. Shlomo'sremarks took the form of commentary on sub-sections of these remarks.
CALENDAR:	The portion-of-the-week was Shemot, but does not figure in theSeminar.
There were no Jewish holidays at the time of the Seminar, although one cancatch allusions to a traditional pagan winter solstice festival co-opted by arather recent Messianic sect and observed on December 25.
TEMPORAL EVENTS: R. Shlomo officiated at two weddings during this period, butthose do not figure in the Seminar.
The Seminar was, of course, over-shadowed by the Peres-Rabin/PLO negotiationson conditions of ceding territorial control of portions of the land of Israel. 
A videotape of R. Shlomo's singing and teaching at the dedication of a Torahscroll at the Tomb of Joseph (Shechem) is available from Natanel Shur, Bet ElB, Israel.
------------------------------------------------------------
.a3
EDITORIAL NOTES FOR THIS DRAFT:  Ok to delete after use:
1) I've not stripped in the Hebrew; that must next be done, in Hebrew (Isuggest using EinsteinWriter; but also with a transliteration, because Hebrewwon't display on standard USA computers).
2)  I think it's important to fill in the REFERENCES, at least clearly tosource; preferably also with English translation of text.  If you can add theHebrew, all the better. 
3)  In many places I've argued that R. Shlomo's work ought not be editted,except minimally.  I don't think that applies to this teaching;  one wants tokeep in all the colour, but trim out the filler (padding).
4)  I continually say that I assert no copyrights to what I've input; and meanit; ie, subsequent editor are expected to feel free to take out my variousinterjections, etc. etc.  However:  (1) Please change the document title (asminimally as possible) so that others don't confuse the versons; (2) Pleaseindicate at the top of your input the trail by which your edit is derived frommy (and any other edits;
5)  I'm using an input format on this document; before outputting you'll needto reformat.  Standard page format is 54 lines of 60 characters each.
6)  I've been trying unconventional paragraphing & punctuation to clarify thelogical structure of oral presentation with minimal edits; think twice beforerepacking it to please your pre-teen schoolteacher.
7)  I make lot of typos; sorry.
l1
.p
1st SEMINAR SESSION, 12/26/93. = SEMINAR DAY 1
TAPED ON TAPE=%PEACE1 (entire) + start of TAPE=%Peace2
Transcribed #sh931226_7yk(tg)pp1-40A
Input on doc=sh931226 + =sh93122b  (sa 1/18/95)

The Pre-Game began at 9:00.
R. Shlomo presumably began shortly around  11:30.
Let Tape = %sh931226yk(1)
TAPE IS APPARENTLY NAMEDf 'PEACE 1' -- Don't yet knowcomplete label, Leah Golomb has it.  Apparently entire tapetranscribed.
L1
-------------------------------------------------------------
START R. SHLOMO lst (MORNING) SESSION, 12/26/93, YAKAR
APPARENTLY START TAPE 1 SIDE A

{start ms. p1 of pp48}

	You know how it it is.  Ok, let me learn for a fewminutes.  Reb Nachman.  Don't ask me any questions.  Andsecond, the most important thing today, I don't want to getpolitical because then we fight each other.  You know howmany people, the thing is, their big reason for fighting ispeace, right.  I want peace, you don't want peace.  Gevalt. I'll knock you off, right.  

	And even before I begin let me tell you someething whichis very important to know.  
	There is a torah from Rebbe Nachman.  {TAPE PROBLEM}
	______ the holy Temple is _____ of the world even morethat (dig it??) .  
	You know in a watch there are a lot of little wheels butthen there's one wheel, the inside wheel right, that turnseverything.
Everything else is working, so why isn't the watch working? It's the same you know, the holy Temple.  And the fact, sadlyenough, brokenly enough, if the holy Temple is destroyed itmeans the little wheel inside is not working properly.  

	So the holy Temple was destroyed twice.   That  meansthe world, the existence of the world, has two enemies. There are two kinds of evil who want to destroy the world.  
	The first holy Temple was destroyed by Nebukenezer. Nubuchenezer was basically a very honest person becaue hesaid, I'm a rapist, I'm a killer, and he made it very clear,he comes to rape all the women and to kill all the men. That's it.
 it.  He was mamash open, a gevalt, right.  Never met a morehonest perosn in my life, right.  
	So this took only 70 years to fix.  Because the evilwhich comes to you 
{START MS. P2}
as evil and wants to destroy is not so hard to get over.
	The second Temple was destroyed by Rome.  Rome -- theworst enemey, less human, more perverted, and more crazy. But they came in the name of civilization.  Now Rome came tobring civilization ____ .  Ah, this is terrible, the momentyou put on yourself the paint of something good when you arerotten to the core.
	You see, with Nebuchadnezzar, to make peace was not sohard.  One way or the other you can put limits to each other. 
	When someone say to you, listen, mamish, do I love you,gevalt do I love you.  OK, I have a little knife in my hand,and it's right in your back, just for novelty, right.  That's the worst, right.  
	So right now when we're getting closer to the rebuildingof the holy Temple, and everything's {APPARENTLY TOOINAUDIBLE FOR TRANSCRIBER TO RETRIEVE; {FNYA1-sa} _____right. 

	You know, there's a passage in the Sans?? [SANZER??]: 
({R. Shlomo greets someone})
	[The SAMZER REBBE?? says:] David haMelech says Anishalom, I am peace _____ been talking to them _____ that Irealize ______ they talk peace but they mean war.  [REFERENCE:  Psalm 120.  'Ani shalom' is usually translated,'I am for peace'.]
	But today I don't want to get involved in peace betweennations.  Right now just learn.  Reb Nachman, peace from onehuman being to the other, because the craziest thing in theworld is that --
	You know when from when I know this {HEBREW:  Number ofthe passage?} the House of Love and Prayer -- not to bebelieved -- there was a big Yoga conference in Geneva
{START MS. P3}
all the yoga teachers of the world.  anyway -- 

	OK now, before even we begin, before we begin after webegin --
	How much of a G-d--revelation is [it?] that we send amissile to the moon?  It's a gevalt revelation, right.  Thatmeans that we human beings, G-d gave us so much sechel, notto be believed _____ right.  Let's say the world began with,I don't know who was the first person who discovered that youcan sit on a horse and go faster, but whoever it was it was agreat revelation, right?  Now we can take a missile and go tothe moon, it's a high revelation, right.  But you know whatone Rebbe said, it's easier to go to the moon than to reachanother human being, 'cause the moon has resistance.  I'msure the moon has a big sigh(?), shalom aleichem.  And whenthey left it definititely  tzelchem l'shalom.  

	But you know what it is:  Peace is not a revelation ofthis world, peace is a heavenly revelation.  It means peaceis, which is beyond borders.  
	Where does hatred come from?  
	I'm _____ I say, I'm a Jew, I'm frum --- You have towake up every monring at six to say kriyat shema blanach??,your tzitzit have to be purple shmon?? gvalt.  YOu don't haveit, you're off, gevalt.  
	What is peace?  When there are no walls, right, no wallsare not of this world.  No walls are only in heaven.  Youknow something, sometime you meet a person, is very cute andsweet but they have so many walls and so many gates you'reafraid that you go in there you'll never get out.  
	But there's the people have no walls right.  I want totell you, something unbelieveable, imagine there are a fewpeople here I will tell -- what's your name, Shlomele --Listen Reb Shlomele, I
.p
{start ms. p4}

want you to tell all your secrets to Dovid.  Chief [Yakar]Rabbi Dovid Zeller.  So what would be your reaciton.  OK,Dovid happens to be a gevalt Yid but, you would [say] listen,I don't know him, right.  
	Have you ever heard anybody coming to the holy Baal Shemand saying, you know I can't really talk to him, I don't knowhim?  Why not?  Because the Baal Shem Tov had no walls,right.  
	See, you can say, I know you and I don't know you, it'salready hard, saying this yes and this no, right.  

	I want to wish the LUBAVITCHER REBBE a Refuah Shlema --you know how many thousands of people -- 

	He talks to them for hours and he never says, no Icouldn't talk to him, no I don't know the guy -- right?  Itell you, I walk on Eastern Parkway [Crown Heights, Brooklyn]in the good old days, and so a yid says to me, where yougoing.  I say, to hear the Lubavitcher Rebbe.  He says, Ah_____
	Not so simple, right.  OK, as it happens Reb Dovidreally has no walls so you could talk to him.  

	Where do we get the strength from not to have walls? Not to have walls has to come from heaven, right.  And Idon't mean heaven, heavn, heaven.  You know, an enechle?? ofREB [GEDALYA?] KEONIG(?) says, the {HEBREW: "shmaim shmainl'H'"  [from the 'Hallel' Psalm 115], heaven is heavenbecause of G-d {HEBREW: aretz?} and the earth he gave tomankind.  So he says, not the earth he gave to mankind. Heaven is heaven because G-d made it heavaen, but {HEBREW:aretz} and the earth -- to make heaven of the earth, this is{HEBREW: _____} this G-d gave to us, this is our mission.  
	It's a good torah to remember, right.  
	So how do we make heaven of this world.  This is why G-dgave us the torah.  The torah is heavenly, right, and theGemara says, until G-d gave us
.p
{start ms. p5}

the Torah on Mount Sinai, heaven and earth never met, up anddown never met, good and bad never met.  When G-d came downon Mt. Sinai and gave us the Torah the walls between heavenand earth stopped mamish. 

	And something else:  
	What is pride?  Pride is:  I have 5 Ph.D's, you havenothing, I speak 7 languages and you don't even know oneproperly, I'm rich, you're poor.  This is all more or less.  

	THE HASSIDIC NOTION OF 'HUMILITY':

	What's a humble person?  
	And I want you to know something very deep:  
	In hassidus and in kaballah, humble doesn't mean: ` youcan spit at me and I say thank you so much, I was just afraidto take a shower and now that you spit on me I have to'.  
	Humble means:  I know esactly who I am.  I know who youare.  And I know that G-d gives everybody certain talents.  
	I want you to know something.  I was telling youyesterday.  Someone said, I'm not sure if it was the KOTZKERor the VOLKER, he was very poor, he says - ah, the heilierRADOSHITSER, was mamash the biggest shlepper of them all
l2
[Prior to R. Shlomo's chevre]
l1
before he became a Rebbe.  It's a long story.  Sonemone saysto him, how can you say every morning, {HEBREW}, that G-d`gives me all my needs'. and HE doesn't give you anything. He says, 'Obviously G-d knows that I need poverty now to fixmy neshama.  So b'ruch haSHEM, he gave it to me.'  Right.  

	I've only to add a VOLKER torah.  Someone says -- Ah,also the RADASHITSER.  He says, 'Aren't you ashamed to be sopoor?  He says, 'Why, did I steal it from somebody?'.  

	You see what it is .  {HEBREW 'ANoach'} means that Ibelieve
.p
{start ms. p6}

that G-d gives everybody in this world what they need for thefixing of their nishamot, right.  That means in this lifetimeI need certain thinsg and G-d gives it to me.  You see, G-dgives always the vessels to what we need to do.  


	TELEOLOGICAL THEORY OF THE HISTORY OF TECHNOLGOY

	Remember, we were learning it 1000 times: 
	It's not because there is a 747 that we can reach Parisin 4 hours, it's because I have to reach Paris in 4 hours G-dgives me a 747.  It's becaue we have to meet so many peoplein our lifetime, if we would have to go with a buggy and ahorse we would never get there.  We have to meet so manypeople in this lifetime.

	So first Rebbe Nachman says, In order to bring peace youhave to be humble.  

	THE XIAN PARODY OF HUMILITY

	And I don't mean this stupid, stupid humility.  Someoneshared with me a good definition what's humble person.  He'sstanding in the Post office in New YOrk on 34th St., histongue is hanging out and he has a big sign, please let mehave the privilege of licking your stamp.  You know.
	I don't want to say anything bad but you know by theworld, humble means, you give up everything, you walk on thestreet and gornisht.

	HUMLITY DOES NOT ENTAIL POVERTY  

	Let me add something.  What do you think Moshe Rabenuwas rich or poor?  Moshe Rabenu spoke to G-d, right, "musthave been the poorest shlepper.  I'm sure he never had awhole shirt and I'm sure who knows that, gevalt, right."  

	Moshe Rabbenu is one of the richest people in the world. Avram [sic, but probably 'Avraham'] was the richest in histime.  YItzhak in this time.  Yak'ov Avinu was the richestman ever in the world
.p
{start ms. p7}

ever.  We don't have the faintest idea of how rich YakovAvinu was, right.  Yosef haTzadik, right, not even a joke,right.  Yosef haTzadik, gvalt.
	But therefore you know I didn't make borders, right.  Sothe first thing, is and this is it, you know, the Torah isnot even given to you when you are so proud.  Becuase it'spossible to learn torah days and nights and every word yousay just confirms that you are something.  
	You know I can learn torah that's even here _____ now weare learning Rebbe Nachman.  I walk out on the street, thefirst yid I meet I say listen brother, yow dare you aretalking to me, I just learned Rebbe Nachman for 2 hours, I'mreally like in a very high state of mind.  Then it wasn'ttorah, then it wasn't from heaven. Torah from heaven is, themore I learn, the more it opens my heart.

	What is peace.  You know what peace is.  Peace is like{HEBREW Kibutza htzaron??} like what happens to me when I amangry at someone when I'm an enemy with someone.  Thedistance between me and that person is awesome, right.  Youknow physically, a person can sit next to me.  But gvalt ifyou are not peaceful with each other, it's further than fromhere to the moon, right.  So you what it is today -- thewhole, forget about today, yesterday.  There is so much goingon to do teshuvah.  That's teeshuva?  Yesterday between meand yiddishkeit was a long distance, right,  and today I'mnot so far anymore, right.  Something happens to the world. I'm getting closer, right.  And you know, imagine maybe untilyesterday he?? didn't even
.p
{start ms. p8}

know he is a Jew, right, suddenly he finds out and he isalready learning like crazy.  So you have {HEBREW emesekfizah? hagoron??} mamish he jumped over hills, overmountains and he got here.  

	Then Reb Nachman says: 
	What is the biggest kiddisuh haSHEM, what is the biggestsanctification of G-d's name.  The biggest sanctification ofG-d's name, if I can give over to people that there is nodistance bwtween you and G-d, that there is no distancebetween you and the Torah.  You know it is so deep, you know.

	You know sometimes you walk into a house and there thehusband and wife, they're sweet, they're cute and everything,but you can see they need a travel agency to talk to eachother, right.  And sometimes you see husband and wife andthere's absolutely no distance.  But sometimes you seechildren.  Today most young people need heavenly travelagencies to talk to their parents.  
	I think I told you once on Tesha b'Av, at the House ofLove and Prayer, we were talking about the saddesst day ofthe year.  So one young lady got up and said, for me theTisha b'Av of the year is Thanksgiving.  On Thaksgiving Ihave to go home and meet my parents.  Nebuch, heartbreaking,right.  It's her privte Tisha b'Av.  So Reb Naschammn says,in order in order to have this heavenlienss, theheaavenlienss like the tzadkikim have, in order to have thisheavenliness of the  torah, you have to be really humble. Humble means to know, to be clear on it, G-d gives me what Ineed and even talent-wise, or money-wise

.p
{start ms. p9}

or everything-wise, G-d gives you exactly what you need.  
	Listen, imagine that the king, and he says to me, I wantyou to buy me a car , and gives me $10,000.  And then he saysto someone else, get me icrecream and he givem them onedollar.  I will say ha, I'm better than you.  I'm not betterthan you.  But here he's only bringing him an icrecream, heneeds a dollar.  In order to bring a car ne needs $10,000.   
	The Rabenu shel Olam gives you whatever you need inorder to do what you have to to in the world.  
L2

{TAPE REFERENCE:  THIS IS 12/26/93, SHORTLY AFTER 11:45 A.M.
FIRST SESSION BY R. SHLOMO OF THE 12/26-12/29 YAKAR SEMINAR.
R. SHLOMO WAS SCHEDULED TO START TEACHING AT 11:00, but sincethis is apparently Tape 1, he probably began closer to 11:30}
L1

	So what it is, if I had no distance between me andpeople, if I have no distance beween me and the torah, thenwhat I shine into people, that there's no distance betweenyou and G-d.  
	Ah gvalt you know, it's so deep: 
	Reb Nachman says:  There is no peace in the worldbecause people deep deep inside feel so far away from G-d. And they feel so far from each other, and peace is mamish cutthrough the long distance {HEBREW:} that is what peace is allabout.  

	You know, obviously I don't even want to say it.  Butthe word peace mens we don't kill each other other, who talksabout that.  Wwe are talking now about closensss betweenpeople.  

	And Reb Nachman says an unbelieveable word here. {HEBREW: }  	You know there is two of kinds of fearing G-d. If I am very distant from G-d, I know tha there is one G-d,then my fear is really G-d forbid that G-d will punish me. How close I feel to a policeman when comes to arrest me.  Imean, standing right on top of me, I don't feel close to him. So why am I afraid that G-d will punish me.  Because I'm notclose to him right.   If I'm close then real fear of G-d isnot fear.  The real yirah is this awesome G-d-awareness.  Youknow what the Baal Shem Tov says -- what
.p
 {start ms. p10}

does it mean I fear G-d?  

	This is really a beautiful torah of the Baal Shem's. It's good to remember:
	To fear G-d means I'm so afraid that I will do somethingand suddenly G-d willl be far way from me.
	You know I love this girl very much but I'm so carefulwhen I talk to her _____ I don't want to every say anythingwhich will break apart our relationship.  If I don't love herthat much I don't give a dam', right.
	This is so deep what he says:  
	You know what it is, gvalt, imagine a person comes andwants to become a Jew, right, a big issue today.  Thequestion is, the person they are talking to, how close do youmake them feel, that they are close to G-d.  How close do youmake them feel that they are to yiddishkeit.  
	Then Reb Nachman says:  There are to kinds of peace. Becuase the first thing is, Reb Nachcman calls it shalomb'Atzmomav, there has to be peace in your bones,unbeleiveable.  You knwo what it is, anything which is real Ican mamish feel it in my bones, right.  Meaning to say, if mybones don't feel it, it's not for real.  Head stuff, I don'tbuy it.  I feel it in my soul.  The question is always, likeall the Rebbes would say., I mean, do your toes feel it,right?    
	So the the first thing is, are you torn apart inside,are you schizopherenic and even holy schizopherenic.  I'mholy schizophrenic because I want to be so frum and I'm notyet. {FN10q-sa} 
Even that is not good, even that is bad.  Even just thinkingthat you're --
	Oh, this is what I wanted to tell you the most importanttorah:
	REB MOTELE CHERNOBLER {text: Reb Mote {start ms. p11} ofChernoble} 
.p
{ms. p11, which starts: 'of Chernoble'}

says, what is a pagan?  This is mamish awesome.  Reb Moteleof Chernoble says a a pagan is somebody who does the mostawesome avera in the world, and after that , it's time todaven mincha, and he davens minchca thinking G-d doesn'tlisten to me.  
	And what is a yid -- an emese yid. l  He says, I can dothe worst avera and after that I mamash daven Yom Kippurshmoneh esrei, 'cause it's clear to me, that sure I shouldn'thave done it, but it's nothing to do with my relationship toG-d.  You know because if G-d tells me to do certain thingsand not do, it's not becaue G-d swnat to make it hard on you,or G-d wants you to listen to HIM, _____ it's for your good. For your good.  
	But we say it's even deper than this you know:  
	So he says, you know the Gemorah says that Adam wasdriven out from Paradise because he was a a pagan.  Adam haRishon was created by G-d and how can you say he was a pagan. And Reb Motele of Chernoble says, because he thought thatafter he does something wrong he's not so close anymoe.  

	'Cause you see what Avraham Avinu is all about.  Andhere I wnat you to mamsih really open your hearts:  
	What did Avram Avinu bering down when he prayed forSdom?  Why was Noach --  what's B'nei Noach, the children ofNoach?  
	But they're not yidden, Avram Avinu's a yid.  Noach,when G-d told him, I have to destroy Sdom you know what is Imean, ___ the people of the flood? _____ why, I mean they areso far gone I can't reach them anymore.  Ah, you mean there'sa distance, it's paganism.  You know what Avraham Avinu says,the most perverted most disgusting creeps in Sdom and Amora
.p
{start ms. 12}

just give me 50 tzadikim and I wil show them that there's nodistance.  You see sadly enough, and a lot of people thinkthat doing tsuva is that you have to sit there and keep adiary of all your sins and then go over it and just like the______ says drown yourself -- bathe in the mud, right.  Sitthere and think oh I did this, I did this.  Real teshvuah isjust to realize, I'm mamish there --  I'm mamash There!

	So the first thing he says, there hs to be peace in myown bones, the peace is, and this is what it is.  You knowwhat, really when you do something wrong, you know what thegreatest punishment is.  That you feel a stranger to G-d. Sadly enough and you know what Rebbe Nachman says:   You knowthe place when I do something wrong I'm not only feeling alike a stranger to G-d, I suddenly feel like a stranger toall the people I love.  It's awesome, right.  You know thereare day I make a few mistakes, coming home, suddenly I don'tfeel so close to my children.  Ah, I made a mistake. right.  

	You know Reb Nachaman says, mamish, I shared it withyou, but it's a good torah to remember:   Yosef haTzadik wasnot angry at his brothters right, that's {HEBREW} he sees hisbrothers and he should call them, you know, you tell them thedirtiest filthiest names, you're disgusting.  You sell  yourbrother, what's going on with you?  Yosef haTzasdik says, I'myour brother Yosef, and please don't be sad that you sold me'cause you did the best thing in the world, right. _____ 
	So Reb Nachman says the deepest torah in the world:  IfYosef would have done something wrong with the wife ofPotiphar

.p
{start ms. p13}

he would have not had the strength not to be angry at hisbrothers.  It would have been so far away from him.  It'sawesome, right.  But because he didn't do anything wrong.  

	Haven't you ever noticed little babies, they don't feelfar from anybody. Every little boy or girl, anybody they talkto , theyll tell you everything, all their secrets.  Becuasethey feel close to you.  They don't even know that there issuch as thing as not being their best friend.  
	I remember at one point when my sister's litle boyIsrael kol was in my shul, he was three years old, he waslike , still the cutest -- not the cutest, [Rbtzn.] Emunah[Witt]'s children are pretty cute -- and he's coming to myshul you know and everyone says the Rabbis grandson, youknow, and he went to every person in shul and told themeverything that had happened to him since he was born.  Istill rmemeber that.  He could not imagine that there issomebody that is not interested, yeah, because how could younot, right.  
	Someone says to me, you have to teach him that peopleare not interested.  Hat v'shalom, I'd never tell him that,that's the end, right.  But this is what we adults are allabout.  
	And when we meeet somebody who really want so to knowand we don't tell them anymore. That's because we are soafraid to open our mouths right.

	Also something else.  You know most of us are fafraid totalk to ouruselves.  'Cause I'm afraid to hear what I wouldtell myself back.  
	I want you to know something awesome: 
	The heiliger REB LAZER MENDEL the son of Reb DovidLelover, the son of the holy Reb Dovid Lelover, the son was agvalt rebbe.  He would go every day to the Holy Wall andl theonly day he would not go was on Tisha b'Av, remeeber.  So thechassidim asked him, Rebbe, on Tisha b'Av when all
.p
{start ms. p14}

of Israel is going why don't you go?  So he says, I'll tellyou:  Every morning when I come to the holy Wall to daven, Isay to the holy Wall good morning.  I can hear the holy wallsaying back to me, good morning.  On Shabbos I say goodshabbos, I can hear the holy wall saying back to me goodshabbos.  But if I would tell the holy wall on Tisha b'Av,what I want to tell the holy wall, and then I would hear theholy wall answering, me back, I wouldn't be able to liveanymore.  Soi I'm not going.
	It's a gevalt; remember it, awesome.

	So you see what it is.  Most people are stranger totheir own neshama (soul) {TRANSCRIBER'S PARENTHESIS} becauseall ouR mistakes are coming, as simple as it is, because weare not, we are so far form ourselves.  Now it's so easy youknow. Let me ask you would you give up a million dollars for5 dollars?  You imagine there is a person who wants to giveyou a million dollars.  But he he owes you five.  Are yougoing to fight about the five and take a chance of losing themillior dollars, you wouldn't right.  
	You know, sometimes husband and wife, parents andchildren, they fight over five dolars and they are losing outon the milllion dollasrs.   Because of that husband and wivesbecome strangers -- 
.p
{start ms. p15}

-- children -- it's not worth it, right.  

	And you see its the depest depths:  
	As long as you are not close to yourself, close to G-d,you don't know what it is to daven.   
	You know what davening is, remember we are larning it alot of times:
	  I go to Rothschild and I tell him, listen brotherRothschild, I read in the Jewish press you're giving a lot ofmoney.  I would like to build a Yeshiva.  Brother Mickey,brother Dovidele, Mimie, brother me, -- humble me, Brother H. I would like to have two million dollars.  He would say OK, Iheard good things about Yakar, tyou'll get two milliondollars.  I walk out and I say, listen, by the way, you know,um, ysterday you know I did something to my musclesyetsteday, cows-be-praised it's gone y' know, I have sometrouble with my back when I bend down, would you mind puttingon my shoes for me.  I say, ok, just tie them.   He'd throwme out.  What a chutzpa.  So I'll say to him listen 2 milliondollars is more than tying the shoes right, but why is is itI can ask you for two million dollars and I cannot ask fortying my shoes?  
	Because to tie my shoes I have to be close.  

	And now listen to what all the Rebbes, say, a tora thatMoshe Rabbneu gave us:  
	Davining, Moshiac will teach us; we haven't learnt yethow to daven.  

	And if you remember to [transcript sic]  torah from allthe Rebbes:  
	Moshiach means the annointed, it also comes from theword        , to pour out your heart, to talk.  SoMoshiach is coimng.   

	You know why was Jerusalem, why was the holy Templedestroyed.  Because, he says basically, beit Tefilati l'kolha-Amim, My house is is a house of prayer for all nations. You know what that means.  Here, you feel close to G-d.  Andif you feel close to G-d, hopefully you feel close to everyhuman being, close.   And suddenly what
.p
{start ms. p16}

happened to us sadly enough becuase we hated each other.  Weweren't close to each other.  So we lost the closeness of  G-d.  Awesome.

	You know it's really not to be believed, it means if youare not really close to people you don't know how to daven.  
	I don't want to say anything bad but:
	Imagine today every person who was hired as a chazan andyou would first go to their houses and find out how do theytalk to their wife and their children, if they talk to them_____.  If you're not very close you cannot be chazan.  Idon't trust you.  You are not the one to pray our prayerbefore G-d.  

	Ah, then he says:  
	If you have peace with yourself, and there is peacebetwen you and G-d, then you are the one to bring peace otthe universe.  
	Ah, that's really something else, right.  Shalom haKlali, Rebbe Nachman always talks about private peace, andworld peace, and if you _____ the holy Temple {HEBREW} gevaltright _____ 

	Those people that try to fix the generation and theytell them what is wrong but they tell them in such a way --	Like Rabbi Akiva says, I don't if anybody really knowshow to tell another person they are doing wrong.  You knowwhy?  'Cause if you tell them too much you destroy them.  Butif you tell them too little then you are lying because it wasmore than that.  Very delicate.  

	I want to bake a break for one  minute.  Anyone want tosay something fast?

{TRANSCRIBER'S NOTE:  Someone spoke. [Madeline?  If so,summarize what she said.}

{R. Shlomo continues:}  It's a good torah what you aresaying.  Why did the Leviim _____ have to wash the hands ofthe cohenim?
.p
{start ms. p17}

Because basically the Leviim might be jealous that thecohanim were the same tibe.  Whey were you chosen and not us? I mean, you're jealousk, you really feel far away.  So theLeviim washed the hands of the conaim.  They were so glad,we're so glad that you are holy.  We were learning it lastnight
l2
{N.B.:  I DON'T KNOW WHERE THAT TEACHING WAS?  I THINK AT THEYAKAR COFFEE SHOP, BUT CHECK; that's 12/25/93}
l1
a RHIZENER tora:
	What is the highest level in serving G-d -- [it] isbeing happy that somebody else is serving G-d.  Gvalt that isawesome.
	Listen:  If I'm the biggest tzadik, there is picture ofme in the Jewish Press saying I'm the biggest Rebbe, why not,I didn't have to pay so much for it, you know it was an openweekend.  But you see another yid --  {FN17q-sa}
l2
[completion  of this illustration left by the lecturer to theimagination of his auditors, so accordingly might be filledin: `and get jealous, because (eg) there was a commericalmessage for his extraordinary family-style glatt kosherNapolianian gourmet restaurant & pizza parlour, located in abeautiful country village in the Modi'in region, in the midstof my teaching -- sa.] 
l1

remember on Chanukah and when we initiate the Third Temple --this is when we make a bracha of somebody else's hanukalight.  Because I'm so glad that another yid is holy.
L2
{TRANSCRIBER NOTES;  THERE WAS A BREAK FOR ORGANIZATIONAL_____ AND MADELINE'S TORA [continued?] [not transcribed]}
l3
I'd suggest transcribing or summarizing orreconstructing that tora]
l1

{R. Shlomo, continued:} 
	It's a good torah, Madeline.  But you see what it is,not everybody is saying such good toras like you you.
	But on a simple level:
	If you know like, the cohenim are the people, thatpeople do something wrong, they come to the cohenim and tellthem, right cause the cohenim [(?) -- crossed out bytranscriber] bring the sacrifice.  So the cohen says, why areyou bringing the sacrifice?  
l2
[Ie, the cohen must be told what sort of sacrifice it is,since each type of sacrifice has difference allotment andritual. -- sa]
l1
So let's say _____ oh, I'm sorry I didn't keep shabbos, I'msorry I ate ham, right, I'm sorry I swore by [the] NAME,right.  So you have to pour your heart right.  So if you hearjust the words, then you don't hear them properly right.  Butwhen you feel nebach how much blood is flowing from the heartwhile he's telling it to you .  Ah, then you are a goodcohen, right, diffaerent hearing, right.  

	Then also you know -- Hands.  You know like, the cohenimare
.p

{start ms. p18}

you know everytHing iS with their hands, you know.  Butbasically what they are doing is exchanging th blood of theanimal for the blood of the person, right.  Meaning to say,I'd do anything in the world to keep you alive.  And um, alsosomething very very deep you know, uh  
l2
{Henceforth I'll not input transcribed um's & uh's & maybenot even all ah's -- sa}
l1
when a person does wrong it weighs so heavy on them, youknow.  
	Remember, Reb Nachman says:  The heaviest thing in theworld is a mistake.  Not 1000 pounds or 10000 pounds. Mistake.  I can't carry it.  How did I know I can't carry it? Because it stops me form moving, standstilll, right.  Fallingdown to the ground and I can't.  

	You know there is an unbelieveable tora of Reb Nachmanthat says:  
	When you see the donkey of your enemy lying under hisburdern, you have to help him. [REFERENCE:  Chumash,       ]{FN18q(sa)}
So he says obviously we're talking about another person,right.  When my donkey, my stupidiy, is lying under my burdenI can't move, right.  I think I did so much wrong I can'tmove anymore.  Better take off their burden and fast, right. 
	So this is what the cohen is doing, right.   Playingwith life.  
	But your [Madeline's] tora is still better.   Anyways. Everything is good.  Let's learn Bet 
l2
{Transcriber's note:  and now they were claifying the sourcewe were learning from on sheets we got in the Bet MIdrash}
l3
{Inputter's note:  Please specify same, & if possibleinput here in translation}}
l1
Dalet we'll learn later on.  Oh you were learning with theminside right.  
{R. David Zeller:} We were learning the front door.
{R. Shlomo:} Dovid, you're a a gevalt.  OK, the first thingis {HEBREW: Derek Lvks shalom (Vav)???} }  
	You have to mamish search for peace.  
    {HEBREW: shhah shlaom ben yisrael ???   }.  

It's a gvalt right.  Imagine if you would put as much energyas he put into making us peace between us and other nations. If he would put that much energy into bringing peace amongyiddin.  What a country we would have, right.
{REFERENCE: (R. Zeller):} So we are on #6 VAV
{TIMEFLAG:  This here is 12/26/93, apr. 12:14 P.M.}


.p
{start ms. p19}
{HEBREW Heading:  
Vsihih shalom l'kol agam bmgiton??}

And this is very important you know.  You meet a _____person, he is mamashs so good so sweet then there is onething -- they can't stop yelling, they can't stop beingangry.   That means their anger, there's their fight betwentheir anger and the rest of them.  Doesn't fit right. Doesn't fit.  It's a difference.
l2
{TRANSCRIBER'S NOTE:  TAPE TURNED OVER; POSSIBLE MISSINGSENTENCES.

l1
START TAPE 1 (ok: tape=%931226yk1='Peace 1') SIDE B

	EVERYBODY NEEDS SOMETHING FIXED

	And now we are not even talking about crazy people fromanother planet.  Every person has something unfixed in theirhearts or in their lives which doens't fit for them.  All ofus have that thing.

TEACHING OF THE BAAL SHEM TOV:  WHY WE EAT SHAL SHEDUES INTHE DARK 


	And this is a good tora to remember.  It's a torah fromthe Baal Shem.  
	Why do we eat the 3rd meal when it's dark?   You know,Friday night if it would be dark it's disturbing [mod. Heb.mfriach].  Friday night you need light, right.  Shal shudesthe more the light there is the more it's disturbing. And yetthere's a feeling, shal shudes, I want it to be dark.  
	So the Baal Shem Tov says -- because here I ate twomeals of shabbos -- I had shabbos 23 hours and I realizedgvalt, Rabenu shel Olam, shabbos hasn't reached my dark sideyet.   There was still something dark in my heart which isn'tfixed yet, gvalt, right.  So we eat shal shudes in darknessand you see what the deepest part of it is. 
	What's the dark part of me.  I'm afraid that if someonewould see it they won't love me anymore.  

	So everybody knows, by hassidim, by Rebbes:
	[During] shal shudes [there] was even more love by thepeople than even Friday night. Because the depest friendshipis, I know there's something wrong with you but, so I loveyou more
.p
{start ms. p20}

	You know I go to a doctor and I say listen eveyrthingOK, Ok, thank you very much for the visit.  I tell the doctoroy vey gevalat am I sick like a dog, ah, the doctor begins tolove me right,  I'm a good customer.  
	Ok:  The first thing is to make peace among yidden. Thenyou have to make peace beweeen a person and their emotions.  	And I want you to know: 
	Reb YISRAEL SANDERS said:  It's easier to finish thewhole Talmud 7 times than to fix one emotion.  ONe emotion.  	You know like I don't want to say anything bad:  I haveseen, I'm sure you too, I have seen people, I'm sitting withthem and their children walk in and their eyes are blank. The person comes in and brings chicken soup their eyes glow. You know what it means?  They dont' know what to love.  Theirloving is completely off center, right.  

	And then:
{HEBREW:  Presumably quote of the text under study:
Vav:  Hinni shalom yiye mholm bmiditon fbmaraton???????}
	You know what it is a person has to be prepared -- notonly for the moment -- especialy when it comes to emotions. You don't fix your emotion while it's happening.  It's toolate.  You have to fix it before, right.  

	I'll tell you something:  eveyrboyd knows I'm crazyabout bagels & lox _____ .  You just say the wordl "Bai-" I'malready crazy right and I hope you'll say the word 'bagel',right.  I dream.  
	I just saw a stupid movie, my kids were turning on thetelevison, its mamish crazy:  Two sisters, they functionnormally,  you think they are normal right but you have afeeling something's wrong, and then one night they talk toeach other,  they're crazy about chocolate. right.  
	I mean:  the whole movie was stupid, but you know it wasso deep on one hand --  you think you talk to a normal person
.p
{start ms. p21}

and then when they see chocolate they mamish become crazy,mamish they lose their minds.  
	So you don't fix it at the moment, the fixing of it islong before.  
	You remember the ISHBITZER says:  To fix anger is notwhile you are angry; [if] you're angry, you'd better get itout of your system because otherwise you'll get sick.  
	{COMMENTARY BY R. SHLOMO ON PRECEDING ISHBITIZERTEACHING:} That means: I need completely a differentorientation.  I have to fix my inside.  
	{ILLUSTRATION BY R. SHLOMO OF HIS PRECEEDINGCOMMENTARY:}  OK:  Imagine I'm stingy like a dog and I walkin the street 
l2
[eg, in the Reagan-to-Gingreich  USA, from my office to mycar] 
l1
and I see a poor man dying and I don't want to give him anymoney.   It's too late now to fix it, I'm stingy, I don'tcare.  
	{MORAL OF THIS ILLUSTRATION:} When do you have to startfixing it -- long before.  YOu know you're stingy, beegin,fixing it.  
	You know what the RAMBANM says:  	
	Imagine:  I realize I'm (G-d forbid) real stingy, so Ihave a thousand dollars to give out and the quetion is:should I give a thousand dollars in one time to a poor rman,or should I change the $1000 into one dollar bills and put myhand a thousand times in my pocket and give it out.  If youknow you're sitngy, better give out dollar bills.  
	You know the famous stories of Rebbe MENACHEM ofCHERNOBLER:  
	Someone gave him $10,000, 10,000 rubles and _____  whatwas the story there?  Well obviously he didn't take it tohimself.   So at that point a yid comes to him and saysRebbe, mamish my daughter is getting married and I don't havea single penny.  If you could give me some money.  Rememberthe story?   No, it  was one thousand  rubles.  The poor mancomes and says, please give me, I need, 1000 rubles.  So RebMenachem gave it to him right away, obviously. {FN21q-sa}
So Reb Menachem told his story after that, I heard it fromthe OLD LUBAVITCHER REBBE:  He says:  when this person comesto me and
.p
{start ms. p22}

he says, give me the thousand rubles, suddenly brother sotoncomes to me and he says, hey , why should yuou give 1000 toone person, the Rambam says you should change it and give athousand 1-ruble's to a thousand poor people.  So you know,he says, you know what I said to brother soton, why didn'tyou tell me this when I got the thousand rubles, right?  Aslong as I wanted to keep the thousasnd rubles for myself hedidn't say a word, now suddenly when I give it to somebodyelse you come bring me a torale I should change it and give athousand rubles to a thousand people.
 
	You know what it is:  *A PERSON ALWAYS HAS TO KNOW ALITTLE BIT WHO IS TALKING TO ME.* {FN22q-sa}

Is it that part of me which wants to become better, or is itthat part of me that to [transcript sic] wants to destroy me.{FN22a-sa}
l1

	And you remember the TZADOK HACOHEN's torah:  Todaybrother soton does not come and tell you do something wrong; brother soton is too gentle to even utter the word 'sin'. He's refined, the high consciousness, {FN22q2-sa}
he went to an intensive weekend, right, meditation.  Hesays,I have something for ou, the best thing that ever happened toyou, the biggest mitzva in the world.  

	Whey do we yell at teach otehr?  Brother soton comes,listen to me, you remember, you took this certain training,yo never did it, now is the time, now is the time.  
	You know it's the wrong time.
	
	OK:  So Reb Nachman say you have to mamish, to prepareyuouself, to prepare youreself for any happening in theworld, for any happening in the world.  

	Let me tell  you something else:  if I depend -- this isstonrg stuffy.  Today, again, psychology talks about italready, but I don't know how much they are doing it.  Do youdepend on other people
.p
{start ms. p23}
	
confirming that you're right.  Do you have any insight, doyou need always someone else to tell you.  
	Meaning to say, if someone says to you, ah you're thegreatest in the world, then you're happy;  someone comes andsays, you know you're the biggest creep in the world, so whocares, I say thank you so much, glad you found out.  

	Am I standing on your feet or on my own feet?  

	I'll tell you something:  I hear crying, someone'sdrowning in the ocean, I'm running down to save that person,and suddenly someone comes running and says to me, you know,this person that was drowing is not religious. So I suddenlystop, I think maybe  I really should call up the {HEBREW}first and find out if I'm {HEBREW:  mehuyav} to save a personwho's not religious, then I'd think more amd more, oh, what'shisa name, argh, he's the worst, it fact it's a mitzvah tolet him drown.  
	But you know, brother soton [better and unparadoxically:'the yetzer haRa'--sa] is a big Lamdan {religious Hebrew: meaning: _____} The Bal Them Tov alway said , you think onlythe tzadkim are big Lamdanim.  Soton knows more than anybodyin the world; he can quote you every Gemara, every posek tomake you crazy, 
l2
[because uncritical self-discipline is obsessiveness -- sa] 
l1

so you have to prepare yourself, inside, to have a certainclarity. 

	So here what it says:  You know, peace is something soawesome and holy, so awesome and holy, you really need suchstrong vessels for it, you know.  
	I tell you something:  again, I can only tell you on apersonsal level, right, without getting involved in thedepths:  
	You know, I'm sure there are a lot of yeshiva bucherimthat walk around thinking, you know if somene's not Jewish Iwon't say hello to them, if someone's not Jewish I have nobusiness wieth them.  Not that ttey're nbad, not that theyhate them.  But they don't have
.p
{start ms. p24}

business with them right.  

	AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL:  R. Dr. Naftali Carlebach 

	I had the utmost deepest privilege in the world, that Igrew up in a house where mamish like my father was the Rabbiof the Jews in the city, but my father knew every person inthe whole city.  Not only my father knew every person in thecity, every person in the city knew my father.  It was like(ahhh) gevalt.  
	I want to tell you something awesome.   My father savedso many lives it's unbelieveable.  
	I'll give you one little example.  
	You know, after the first world war the communists tookover in Budapet and there was a whole little revoliton at theend of the first World War, (not now) and they killed a fewpeople.  (OK, forgaet it), now we are talking here maybe1934.  
l2
{'not now' and 'ok forget it' may have been remarks directedat someone who wanted to interrupt -- sa}
l1
And a yid comes from Israel and suddenly the Austrian Policedecided that he looked exactly like this person who startedthe riot in Budapest and since the Hungarian police waslooking for him, then he's sentenced to death in Hungary and Austria has a deal with Hungary.  So they have to send himback to Hungary.   And I'll tell you the truth, my father didnot know if it's true or not, maybe it is true, right, but inthe meantiime this yid was ready, he himself admitted he toldmy father privately, "to tell you the truth I admit I was aCommnunist before, then I went to eretz Israel and became a[presumably Zionist, as distinct from internationalist] yid. I have children, my daugher is gettting married in fourweeks.  He was completely broken, right.  He was completelybroken, right.  And he went to all the Rabbis and they saidyou know we don't know you and maybe you really did it wedon't know you.  My father went to the Head, the highestjudge in Austria.  Why was he so close to my father.  Myfather was very close to cardinal Turetou??.
.p
{start ms. p25}

I told Dovedel [R. David Zeller, Director of Yakar].  Becausemy father was the only one who actually knew the whole biblein Latin and in Greek mamish by heart.  Officially everyCardinal has to know the bible, they don't know it, anyway. To make it very short my father went to the Cardinal and myfather went to the highest judge.  My father says I want youto release this person.  He says Rebbe {transcript sic, but'Rabbi'?} Carlebach if you tell me, he'll be released in onehour.  Gvalt right.  Imagine if my father had listened to allthe other Rabbis in Vienna, who told my father what are youtalking to the Cardinal 
{THERE IS A LONG BLANK IN THE TRANSCRIPT; ONE OUGHT TO TRY TORECOVER THE INAUDIBLE MATERIAL}
the goyim right.  In the meantime he saved somebody's life. And imagine.   To go very far, imagine that the chatan of hisdaughter would have found out, the father of the future Kalawas in Hungary, [imagine that the father of the bride wouldhave found out that the father of the groom] he was hangedbecause when he was young he was a Communist, and he killedsome people.  Then the Shiduch would be off, right.  Andbesides the brokenness and everything else.  

	So he says the most important thing is, it has to beabsolutely not important to you what people tell you. Andthere's certain way you have clarity that's what you have todo .
	On one hand peace is much being close to othr people, somuch not having any distance between other people, and yet Ihave to keep a certain dfisdtance.  The distance is thatmamish when I know this is right, I cannot listen to you, Ilove you but I cannot listen to you.

	It's heavy, you see what we do.  We hate people but wealways listen to them.  We always let other people make uscrazy.  You know how many people are broken and lonely inthis world because they listened to somebody else, right. What do we know.
{TRANSCRIBER NOTES:  CONVERSATION WITH MIMI [FEIGELSON}
.p
{start ms. p26}

MF:  She knew the shidduk was righ tbedaause everyone toldher not to marry.
R. Shlomo:  _____ when was that?  Sure, if it's a badshidduch no-one says anythihg bad, right.

{R. Shlomo continues lecture:}
But how do you get this inner strength.  Listen to this.  Thedeepest conflict in our lives I want to be close to people. And I have this stupid idea that close means I have to listento everything you say.  Close means, I have to depend on yourapproval of me.  It's the other way around.  'Cause you knowwhat happens when I listen to you.  After that I'm so angryat you I don't want to know yuou.  You know what it is.  Itis so easy to put everything on other people, when do I puteverything on other people.  When I listen to them at thewrong time.  YOu see on one hand, I really mamish have tolisten to people.   And I also have to be so close.  Butinside it doesn't make a differnece.  I love you.  This iswhat it is.  Where do I learn this from the torah.  

	Now listen to this it's uinbelievable.  Take the wholeGemara right.  I buy an arava, you know, I buy -- you shouldsay listen if Rova?? says I'm wrong, I must be wrong.  I'llbuy a _____ I heard Reb Yochoel desn't like what I said.  Thewhole gemara would be off right.  Imagine my sidur?? wouldsay, you know, we just found out from a fax that Neshmadoesn't agree.  It's off.  

	I want you to know something which I'll never forget. I'm learning a Mesifta, right, and there _____ and my Rebbe's_____ there was one tosfos -- of the Eben Ezra on Kasrusright.  You know when tosfos asked the question in the 14thcentury _____ years and they were the greatest in the world,right.  I"m sure they had an answer but not every word theysaid was written down, right, but tosfos just asks questions,
.p
{start ms. p27}

so here comes one of the chevra in Mesifta comes to RebShlomo (???) 
l2

{I THINK THAT HERE THE SPEAKER IS R. SHLOMO CARLEBACH AND THEREFERNCE IS TO SOMEONE ELSE, MAYBE HIS TEACHER IN YESHIVA,BUT I'M NOT SURE -- sa} 
l1

and says _____ really good, right.  So while he was saying itthere are already 20 people standing there.  What a chutzpa,what do you mean you think, you think tosfos didn't know yourstupid answer.  Shlomo got very angry.  He says, you knowwhat the holiness of us yiddin is.  That tosfos asked thequestion 800 years ago and this little boy here is the onlyone who answers it.   It's unbelieveable right.  'Causeeverybody has their share in the torah and in the world,right.  

	But I'll tell you something swesome, awesome is not thethe word:  Here the brothers want to kill Yosef.  And let'sassume, and they were convinced that they're right, beause Iwant you to know, without geting involved now.  It was mamishfrom heaven, right, 'cause G-d, it was the beginning of goinginto exile but anyway.  It says, let's throw him in a pit,and then it says, and we'll see what happens to his dreams.[REFERENCE:  Genesis, :      Parshat:      ]
And the way it's translasted is, they said it cynical, yea --let's see what will happen to his dreams.  But the Zohar haKodesh says, and the Gemorah, Bat Kol, a voice from heavensays {HEBREW: (v'roah {rest of quote not in transcription}
let's see what will happen to his dreams, right.  And then itsays {HEBREW: v'yshama Reivem}, and Reuven heard it and hewanted to save him.  And it says, OK, the way we learn,simply, Reuven heard, he decided, Ah, I got to get him out ofthe pit.  You know what the Zohar kodesh says.  The onlyperson who heard this voice form heaven was Reuven, {HEBREW,again:  v'yshamer Reuven} He heard a voice form heavensaying, we'll see what will happen to his dreams, right.  Youthink it's the end, it's the beginning, right.  He asks hisbrothers, did you hear something?  They said no, so he shouldsay to himself, ah, listen, obviously I'm dreaming, I'mcrazy, I have to see my therapist

.p
{start ms. p28}

I hear voices.  Where would Reeven be if he wouldn't havewanted to save Yosef.

	So you know the whole prophet Hoshea, who's the master{HEBREW: shuva yisrael}, right, it's because he's a greatgrandson of Reuven and did tsuva.  Awesome, right.


	Mamish, you don't know, you see what it is .  This is sodeep, you know, it sounds so simple.  On one hand I mamishhave to love people.  On one hand I have to know that there'sno distance between me and another person.  But you have torealize what I need for the fixing of my neshama.  G-d is nota yente who is telling eveyone wvearyting abotu me.  G-d istelling me what I have to know for the fixing of my neshama. 
{R. Shlomo:  Sister Mimi, you had enought already?
 MF:  I'll come back later.}

	Then one more thing.  Do you know something?  SometimesI have the greatest opportunities to do something for G-d. And I'm not doing it because I listened to people.  I'mbecoming a stranger to G-d.  Because G-d mamish listened tothe inside of my inside .  You know what it is, suddenly Ihave the deepest secrets with G-d.  Because the deepestdepths is you think G-d can only talk to me via anotherperson.  Although someimtes G-d talks to you via anotherperson.  But if you mamish have this inside, mamish my hearttells me, means G-d tells me directly gvalt, right.  

	And then he says:  You love your friends more if youhave
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{start ms. p. 29}

this inner strength.  So you hear friends, you cannot bringpeace unless you have a little bit on an idea of what youhave to do in this world.  And you have to stick to it.  Youknow it's so easy, it'ss so easy, to get lost, right.  It isso easy to get lost.  And also it's so easy to be angry at G-d.  Why am I angry at G-d.  Because I don't believe thatreally G-d knows exactly what I have to do, fixing my life. Whatever happens this is, that's what it is.  

	I mean, there are thousand of stories but one of the topstories is one of the, I'm not sure it was PSCHISTHER orsomebody else, was suddenly taken to prison.  It was mamishcompletely like, how do you say, it was like false witnesses,it was just crazy.  So he should have been angry at G-d,right.  But it was clear to him _____ Rabbi _____ I have tobe in prison to meet somebody there.   And the crazy thingis, when he came to preison, he met one yiddele who wanted tocommit suicide that night, he'd given up on life, and he wasthere for three days and he mamish gave him so much strengthand then he left.  And this yiddele came out eventually andbecam a big hasid and REB SCHNERSON {the LUBAVITCHER REBBE??}said, I"m so proud of you that you were not angry at G-d whenhe took you to prison. That you mamish knew most probablythere is something important I have to do there.

	I mean I'm sure everybody in their own life hasthousands of stories.  You know you go the wrong way, makethe wrong U turn, you are in the wrong place and think I'm inthe wrong palce.  You are always in the right place.  Theonly thing is if you come to the wrong place and you sit
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{start ms. p30}

there and krecks and are angry and G-d then you won't findout what you are doing, right.  But if someone says, hey, I'mhere, let's see what I have to do.

{TIMEFLAG:  12/26/93  BREAK 12:44; RESUME:  13:14 }

	Reb Nachman says:  If a person is far from Yiddishkeitand far from G-d and then suddenly he wants to become alittle more of a yid, more of a mentsch, the first thing, hehas to be so careful not to be sad because the closer you getto G-d the more G-d can't stand your sadness.

	You know imagine someone comes to visit me and he'ssitting in the lobby and krechsing away.  OK, I don't care. I mean, I mean I wish he wouldn't but he does.  I'm takinghim to the dining room he's krechsing.  Imagine I say OK, I'mgoing to show you my bedroom, ah, listen, if you startkrechising I don't have strength for it.  So he said thecloser you get to G-d, the more you are offending G-d withyour sadness.  Cause basically what does sad mean?  I'm sosad that it is this way and not the other way.  That means Ireally believe the other way is better right.  So again itsmells of paganism, a little bit, the deepest depths.  Itmeans, I don't really believe that G-d knows what HE isdoing.

	But also something else.  There's the pasasge that says{HEBREW:   }  There is strength and there is joy in Hisplace.  It means, whevere G-d is.
{	L'chaim, l'chaim.  }

	You kow what I mean to say.  Let's put this way.  If youare sad during the week, OK.  On Sahbbos you are closer toG_d.  If you are sad on shabbos it's a big avera.  You see,when you eat ham, it's the same if I eat it on shabbos or onFriday {FN30q-sa}
But when it comes to sadness, shabbos is a big avera
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{start ms. p31}

'Cause shabbos --- chevra if you're planning to be sad try toknock it off on Friday.  And again this is very important toknow. We're not taliking here about fake joy.  Imagine I'mmamish sad inside, I'm sad.  Reb Nachman doesn't say that youshould stop being sad inside, if you want to cry, you cry,but remember this,  the most important tora Rebbe Nachmansays:  
	Where does it say that while you are sad you can't behappy.  Here is the deepest tora in the world.   
l2
[Cf. PVK, Zenith 1992(?) (recollected):  'And here you maythink that you are being disloyal to your sorrow.  But yoursorrow can take care of itself.']
l1
In this world -- in the world of four walls, of inches, andone is one and two is two, you're sad or you are happy.  
l2
[Cf. politicized modern Hebrew, 'yesh gvul'; slogan of thosewho feel that the discipline of religious Judaism, and thegeo-political implications of same, are not worth theeffort.]
l1

On the heavenly level, on a non-boundry level, I'm sadbecause something happened to me by _____ I'm filled withjoy.  

	Then:  Rebbe LEVI YITZHAK OF BERDITCHEV woke up onemorning, and he was dancing like crazy, couldn't stopdancing.  So when he didn't come to shul so hassidim camelookig for him coming to his room, the heilige Rebbe Yitzhakgvalt -- the first real hippie in the world, right.  So thefirst really drop-out, dancing like crazy, so they asked himwhat happened.  He said: this norning when I woke up I as sosad, I as so broken, didn't know what to do with myself. Suddenly I realized, gvalt, I'm a Jew.  So who cares for allthis sadness.  I'm so glad I'm a Jew.  
	See:  That means, it doesn't mean you stop being sad, Iwant you to hear, I had a reason to be sad.
{TRANSCRIBER'S NOTE: CONVERSATION}       
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.p
