;.cR. Shlomo/Weddings/3ming/chuppa, miscellaneous
;.l1,6,60,66,1,0,10,75,192,2,15,20,25,127,10,0,
sh3wchup
R. Shlomo
Weddings
3ming
Chuppah, 
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THE CHUPAH
{The Hupah is held up by four poles at 4 corners.  The four polesare traditionally, as far as I have seen at R. Shlomo weddings,held up by four men wedding guests.  I say:  Cf. the vision ofEzekiel. -- sa}

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PUTTING UP THE CHUPPAH:

	And now we need something very special.  We need that theholy bride and her bridemaids and her holy family should walk  alittle bit, to this side, to the left side.  And {the groom}, and and his family walk a little bit to this side and then let's putup the chupah.  And friends, we have to make a little space forthe holy bride and groom.  
	    "Veheshaanu tachas ha'ets".  Avraham Avinusaid to the angels, and you're telling to your children, here's alittle "Ets HaChaim" and mamash you promise your children thatyou'll prepare a feast for them.  Mamash a little bread,   "EinLechem ele Torah" and "Ein Mayim ele Torah".  Mamash I bless youthat whatever you promise your children right now, you shouldalways remember and keep it,  .         
	(Building the Chuppah- song "Yerushalayim")

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WALKING TO THE CHUPPAH

<ABE
	You know my beautiful friends, when a baby is born itbasically knows a lot of things.  We don't have to teach a babyhow to cry.  He knows how to cry.  You cannot force a baby tolaugh, he's laughing by himself.  There is one thing the babyneeds the parents for.  To teach him how to walk.  
	And here I want to give you over a Torah from the Heilage RebMeir Premishlaner.  The Heilege Reb Meir Premishlaner says,`What's the difference between a stranger teaching you how towalk, and your mother and your father teaching you how to walk? It's very simple.  You know my beautiful friends, how do we learnhow to walk?  By falling down a thousand times.  
	And here Chosan and Callah, I want you to open your hearts inthe deepest way. Before the chupah I want to give you over a Torahfrom the Heilege Sod Yesharim.  What is Rochel and what's Leah. Rochel is the mother of Yosef HaTsaddik.  Yosef HaTsaddik mamashis learning the Torah and he keeps every word.  What's Leah allabout?  Leah is the mother of Mashiach.           
	And I want you to know, the Ishbitser says that the Midrashsays, the Zohar HaKodesh says, sometimes you go to your soulmateand sometimes your soulmate goes to you.  Rochel is on the levelthat Yaakov went to look for Rochel... because you cannot look formistakes.  You cannot look for `falling'.  You look to stand up. So he goes to look for Rochel.  Rochel is mamash... YosefHaTsaddik is standing straight,  .  Mamash, I knowwhat I have to do, I have to put on Tsitsis, I have to put keepShabbos, I have to put on Tefilin.  But here comes Leah.  Shecomes to him.  He didn't even know she is his soulmate.  He neverdreamt of her.  It came all by mistake.  All by mistake.  But thisis the deepest teaching in the world.  So here we know that it isso special, Chosan and Callah walking to the Chuppah.  Standingunder the chupah is on the level of Rachel.  Walking to thechuppah, because you only learn walking by falling all the time... is the level of Leah.  So, Chosan and Callah, mamash swear to eachother, you want to connect to each other not only on the level ofRochel, standing, knowing what you have to do...  You should alsobe together on the level of falling... standing up.  Falling andstanding up.                                                       	So here Reb Meir Premishlaner says the deepest Torah.  When astranger comes and teaches a baby how to walk, each time the babyfalls down the stranger says, "Ach, again, can't you learn alreadyhow to walk?  Disgusting, falling down all the time."  That's thestranger.  But a mother says... Let's say the babele takes onestep and falls down a hundred times, the mother says to thebabele, "You know, I can't believe it, you took one step!! Unbelievable!"                                                      	You know what Leah is all about?  Leah is telling everyYiddele, "Even if you fall a thousand times, you keep on standing. Don't stop."  So I want to bless Chosan and Callah, you shouldalways always always, tell each other,  "Gevaldt, you took onestep.  One step."  
	And I want you to know one more thing which is so importantfor Chosan and Callah to know.  Right now this is your littleErets Yisrael.  You're building a little Holy Land.  A little BaisHaMikdash.  And G-d says to Avrohom, "Lech Lecha M'artsecha." Leave everything and walk to the Holy Land.  And Rashi says, "ۙ    "  To get  sachar, to get  reward forevery step.                               	       
	(Reb Shlomo singing, welcoming Chosan to the Chupah)
	"Mi Adir al haCol, Mi Boruch al haCol, Mi Gadol al haCol.  HuYivorech es haChosan v'et haCallah."

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STANDING UNDER THE CHUPPAH

< JOSHU

You know what's wrong with the world?  They have no center.  Theyhave no center.  A woman without a husband has no center.  And aman without a woman has no center.  So right now when your holychasan is standing in the middle and you give him the strength tobe the center, and he gives you the strength to be the center. And the truth is, you know what our real center is?  Our children. Our children are the center.            

[The bride is escorted, in < =joshu, by her parents and hergrandmother. I assume all relatives would be allowed, but I don'tknow.}  

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< my.ak

STANDING UNDER THE CHUPPAH: Why the groom stands in the center

    {To the groom} I know you are very humble, but you have tostand in the center, because you see what it is:  How do you knowhow much you love a person?  I have a guest.  Then the personcomes, oy, you know I really forgot to prepare everything.  Canyou wait a little bit?  I'll go out shopping and bring something. The problem is not that I didn't shop before.  The problem is thatI don't love this person.  When you love a person the most, youprepare everything.  What's the most important thing in the world? To have a center.  Our lives should have a center.  We're walkingaround in circles all our lives.  So here, before you ask {yourbride} to come and be your wife, you know what you are preparingfor her?  A center.  And who is the center?  The Gemora says, G-dis     (mikomo shel olam)  G-d is the center of theworld.
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< sh2mosh < moshe.ak

THE BRIDE AND GROOM STAND UNDER THE CHUPPAH

   So when do you feel how much G-d is protecting you?  When youstand under the chupah, at this moment, mamash G-d gives you thestrength to feel that G-d is above you all the time.  So mamashthis is not the shuk [marketplace] .  You have to buy themerchandise right now.  I bless you to buy it for yourself, foryour children, for your grandchildren.   Whenever you have tastedholiness, doesn't compare to the holiness of the chupah, theholiness of the Kedushin.  Mamash the holiness of all of Israel.                                                                      (Blessings under the Chupah)
            
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< w-y&s

THE CHUPPAH
   (singing) Boruch ha-ba b'shem hashem. Mi adir....
[[R. SHLOMO OFFERS COMMENTARIES ON THE 7 PATRIARCHS, PRESUMABLY INCONJUNCTION WITH THE BRIDE WALKING 7 TIMES AROUND THE GROOM.  Butthe transcriber did not include the Hebrew, so much of thissection is not complete nor even clear enough to be usable. Because of the gaps, what I have editted down to a coherent wholeis much thinner than the original.]

   The first thing is Mi Adir...? Adir means...there's no word inEnglish we just say adir, it's the highest kingdom in the world -Avraham avinu, when he walked in the world, there was nopublicity, but gevalt -- mi adir me-hakol.  His presence was sostrong.  Today Avraham avinu is still aroundd. 
	Yaacov Avinu had 12 children, like nobody ever before, andits the greatest thing in the world --  G-d's reatness , 
	David hamelech, melech yisrael chai v'kayam. David was a realking, David means, above pettiness, above hatred, above all theevil in the world, 
	*You know when mashiach is coming, he's not fighting evil; wehave to do that before mashiach is coming.*           
	*In this world parents have all the rights over theirchidren; not in heaven.*  I want to bless you -- not that youshouldn't yell at your children, you shouldn't even want to yell.Like David hamelech I want you to be above anger, above everythingwhich doesn't fit.    
	Between husband and wife, its so easy to say bad things toeach other, it is so easy to hurt each other's feelings.  I blessyou, from the deepest deepest depths.      to be above all this.
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< w-aa&r

THE BRIDE AND GROOM PRAY SILENTLY UNDER THE CHUPPAH*

	{To the bride} if you ever  concentrated in your whole life,let this be the utmost concentration.  {To the groom}:, Tor youalso, from now until the end of the Chuppah, can you concentrate? Because your life depends on it.  Mamash.  

	I want to tell you something way-out.  That one time a womancame to Reb Nachman and she complained, and she said, "I have somuch trouble with my maid.  She doesn't listen to me.  She makesme trouble".  Reb Nachman says, "You know what the problem is? While you were going to the Chuppah, you didn't pray for that,because whatever you ask for under the Chuppah is fulfilled".  
	So we bless you, Rochela, that even if you forgot to pray forsomething, that it should be fulfilled anyway.  And please includeus in your prayers.  All of us, all of us need a lot of blessingsfrom above.  And Avramela, you should also pray for all of Israel,for the whole world.                               

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< my.ak

THE BRIDE AND GROOM CLOSE THEIR EYES

{R. Shlomo asks the bride and groom to close their eyes}
	When we say Shma Yisrael, G-d is One, we close our eyes.  Ithas millions of reasons.    
	Reb Nachman says: when something is far away from you, youopen your eyes.  The closer it gets, the more you have to squintyour eyes.  And then there is something which is so close, that inorder to see it, you have to close your eyes.  
	When I say, "Hashem Echad," "G-d is One", G-d is so close,that I have to close my eyes.  We bless you that you should beclose to each other all your life.  But this moment is once in alifetime. So I want you to be so close, that in order to see eachother, you have to close your eyes.  
	You know -- children, when they are born, they keep theireyes closed, because they feel so close to their parents, thatthey have to keep their eyes closed.

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< w-y&b

THE CHUPPA

	The Chuppah as much as it is for everyone, the Chuppah rightnow is just for {the bride and groom}.  There has to be absoluteclear space.  Beacuse it's a King and a Queen
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WHY THE BRIDE SAYS NOTHING UNDER THE CHUPPAH: The need to keepsecrets 
< sh2wwy&s  < w-y&s

	Acording to holy tradition, the chatan says a few words {Ie,and only, the formula declaration that he is marrying the bride,recited upon giving her the ring in the presence of witnesses, bytradition under the chuppah} and the kallah doesn't say anything. 
	I want you to know, the truth is, the kallah knows so manysecrets under the chuppah she's afraid to open her mouth.  Becauseshe knows if you know so many secrets and you're not permitted totell, so how do you handle it? You don't say anything.

[R. Shlomo explains, quoted above, that the when the groom coverteh face of the bride, allthe bride's chidren come down heaven,accompanied by the four mothers (Sarah, Rivka, Rachel v' Leah.)}
	And obviously, you know the Torah, there's no torah givenover from the four mothers.            said the highest thing. Itwill not be revealed until mashiach is coming. You know friends,the most unbelievable thing. You know the mashiach is coming, 

	"Hear the voice of the groom and the voice of the bride..."And [when?} mashiach is coming and the one who brings him in, thebride can also say words under the chuppah.  {To the bride} allthose deepest feelings and depths of God-revelation that God givesyou now, you should guard them, the  deepest way.
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< w-y&b

WHY THE BRIDE DOES NOT SPEAK AT THE MARRIAGE CEREMONY

	According to our holy Chacmamin the bride doesn't sayanything.  It is only because what \ is giving you under theChupah is so deep that until Mashiach is comimg, the world has novessels for it.   
	it says when Moshaiach is coming there'll be kol choson andkol challah, you'll hear the voice of the groom and the voice ofthe bride, so the Zohar HaKodesh says, what do you mean a voice ofthe bride, the bride doesn't say anything?  	       
	So it says: before Mashiach is comIng the world has novessels to hear the voice of the bride, but when Mashiach iscoming you'll be able to hear the voice of the bride also.
	{To the bride} We want to bless you  your children should bemarried when Mashiach is coming and your daughters should be ableto speak under the chuppah also, the world should have vessels forthis utmost love.  Obviously women are capable of love much morethan men, that means whatever a man can express in love to awoman, the world has vessels; but to hear how a woman expressesher love to a man, only after Mashiach is comng. So mamash I wishMashich would come right now
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